Monday, 4 January 2010

Celebrity Big Brother 7 (2010): Thank God for Abortion

The live feed was quite worryingly boring last night from what I saw of it. Are the housemates a little old?
I kind of like Stephen Baldwin. Nicola seems thick as shit. But at least she's seen the Usual Suspects, I haven't. I like Alex Reid. I don't know why. I don't know why people don't like him, but they still like Jordan. At least he's a new person to pity.
Haha Nicola is totally tactless! 'Have you got a spray tan?' Nah, his mum's an orangutan.
Stephanie Beacham is pretty cool. She's adding a bit of glamour to proceedings. I like the fact she called herself an old slag and patronised the fuck out of NT. How did she know Baldwin was a Christian? She knew a lot about Alex, too. Oh, the paper.
Nicola: 'What's a devout Christian?' How do parents actually get away with bringing up such brainless children? They should actually be arrested once the child reaches 18 and makes statements like that. Nicola, a man who wears women's clothes is a cross-dresser, whether it turns them on or not.
Sov! is kind of an idiot, right? 'You're smaller than me' probably isn't the smartest meeting to a well-adusted young man like Sisqo (heh).
Politics already is good as a topic of conversation. At least a couple of people have read a paper, even if it's a bad one.
Did Bowers and Reid have a fight? Who knows? Dane looked like he was lying to me. He looked shifty. Why has everyone read the paper? Aren't they meant to keep them isolated? Oh that was in the good old days, right. (sob)
Heidi: 'thank god for abortion!' LOL! The best part was Nicola's face. Yes! Annoy that little div. What a way to make a first impression on people. Brilliant.
Kat is so cute! I think she's lovely with that flower in her hair. Oh god, I'm going to like all the 'baddies'. That can only end in tragedy. Oh Basshunter arrived but I forgot, he was so boring.
Vinnie Jones! What a geezer! Tool.
God, is there any new material, or is it all just recycled scraps from last night? If so, I'd rather watch the Ooglies. I like those little fellas.
It actually made me cringe when Nicola goes 'what's a laundromat?' She's got a BABY. She has the next generation in her HANDS. It's SCARY. I am also ashamed of women like that. Her only good point is she asks questions you wouldn't dare. So not only did her mum fail to teach her any facts or words, she also didn't teach her any manners. Epic fail.
I like Stephen Baldwin. He is charismatic. That doesn't mean he's not pure evil. The jury is still out. What is a 'platonic crush'? Sounds sinister.
What channels is Alex Reid on? Babestation? I was on his side up until then. But I still like him 94% more than I like that dead-eyed monotone, botoxed, 'businesswoman of the year', Katie Price.
Ekaterina is English! Honestly, the papers make up such a load of shit, like she was fresh off the boat, gold-digging and lurking round Rolling Stones concerts with her man-net. She seems really nice.
Haha to Stephen complaining about women's boobies in the paper to Jordan's boyfriend.
OMG Nicola saying 'one of my friends was a proper slag'!!! *shocked face*
Oh Lord, I don't want to hear the Alcoholics Anonymous prayer. Fuck off. I'm out of the frying pan and into the fire.
Has Lady Fa-fa got her eye on Basshunter? Has EKat? I don't know. I'm sure the editors will tell me.
What's up with Stephanie's sheets? Not the appropriate tog? There, there, lovie.
I like the way Heidi speaks to people, just totally blunt and emotionless. It's funny. Alex was up Vinnie's arse. Surprise, surprise. I thought everyone on the planet HATED Vinnie Jones. It's odd to see people crawling up him.
Hmm, quite a sedate opening episode, but it's always the way. Day 4 is normally when BB shitstirs big time and there's a big ruckus. Bring on the brawl!

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