Thursday, 23 August 2012

Celebrity Big Brother 2012: Do you think I give a fuck right now?

OMG just watched BBUS. It outclasses our BB times a billion. My heart races at all the twists and turns! It's just non stop adrenaline, lies and backstabbing, and those people don't get voted out; they go the distance! Amaze.
Meanwhile yesterday BBUK treated us to three and a half hours of complete rubbish, punctuated only by a few seconds of Jasmine's evil genius. You can see why Simon Cowell likes her; she sure knows how to deliver a one liner. On Nina on BOTS: 'I didn't even know she was still alive.'
Well, 'it's too early' wasn't a denial from Julie, was it? I think she is playing a game, but don't we like a gameplayer/planner these days?
It's not very good that they were allowed to talk 'off the record' on the way to the supermarket, was it? Another production fail. Julie, you've been caught out, just admit it, it's no sweat. You can like two people at the same time, it's no biggie.
Julie said 'situation' uhuhuhuhuhuh. I'm going off leopard print again. Julie and Rhian are like the before and after plastic surgery advert.
Jasmine didn't 'kick off' this morning, she asked you politely what was what, Julie. Don't milk it. I think my mum might have been right about Julie all along. Can we move on from this non 'storyline' now? It hardly matters anyway, Jasmine's gone now, sadly. What were the percentages? I still don't know.
Rhian can't wait to be reuinited with her phone *insert joke here*. Oh get on with it, all this piano and fading in and out is tedious.
Saying 'good luck both of you' is pointless; you might as well say 'good luck neither of you.'
I loved it when Jasmine told Harvey what was what. Tut tut tut! I hate Harvey coming over like a goody-goody when we all know. We all know.
I think we lost the smartest person in the house. It just so happened she was batshit crazy. Well at least we've got Rhian to provide the entertainment....zzzz.
Why are they all cooking right after an eviction? You think you'd be too pumped up to eat.
I'm going to have to fast foward through these nominations, because there's no way in hell I'm sitting through this again. Last night was absolutely ridiculous; should have been 60 second nominations; in out, the end. If they had a clue, I think they packed it in that suitcase full of 50 pound notes they gave Conor.
This is how quickly they should have done these nom noms last night.
Julian even admitted he was shallow! I suspected he was, but didn't think he'd admit it. It's a shame, as I want to get under his skin more.
Prince is nominating Hev. Good. I don't blame him for nominating Julian. Harvey doesn't approve of rinsing men, but he doesn't mind assaulting and cheating on women; whatever floats your boat, I guess.
I think Julian is a cold fish. But he's funny. He reminds me of Brian Dowling in that way, that he's got good quips, but there's not much about him.
Does Harvey have fans? I don't think him swapping with Sitch would be a fair swap. MTV music awards convo: I'd hate a man saying he was going to buy me a dress. I'll buy my own fucking dress, thanks and not have to suck the dick of someone I don't like.
Ashley is so pointless. What a boring housemate. Even his nominations were boring.
So Cheryl, The Situation, Coleen, Julian and Prince Lorenzo are up. I'm glad a load of the oldies are up; makes a change from it being all the young pretty girls. I'm glad the vote is quite split, but I'm worried Prince Lorenzo is going to go before we even get to know him. Prince Lorenzo is an animal activist, too, so us Moz fans should give him a chance.
I think Julie's tactic is just to tell everyone what they want to hear. Which is fine, until people start swapping stories, as happened at the supermarket.
Prince Lorenzo the human calculator is doing the math. LOL to The Situation opening the oven and going 'what the fuck's going on in here' as the chicken is billowing out smoke. My boyfriend said Jasmine probably turned it up to high just as she left.
I REALLY want Coleen to go. I do think she's right about Julie, actually, but I just don't like her. It feels like she's got a vendetta against Julie.
Does Julian call Sitch 'The Occasional Table' to his face? 'Irksome' - lovely word. And calling Samantha Brick common, too. I don't think she so much writes for the Mail as wrote one troll-y article for the Mail.
Why is Julie blowing smoke up Sitch's arse? 'She's got this situation at home.' No, that's someone else she's got at home. She's falling in love with the MTV music awards, FFS, not The Situation. Yeah you're just so right for each other because she's a gold-digger, and he's got the gold. If he wants to be rinsed; then yeah, go for it. But let's not pretend this is Chantel and Preston falling for each other (which they actually did, albeit briefly). This isn't even Jay and Louise. It's not love; it's a goddamn arms race.

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