Thursday 2 August 2012

Big Brother 13: Pulling a whitey

Sorry I'm late, was waiting for my drunken partner to return, and he returned a little later than anticipated. And he ticked the 'boo' box on my blog last night. Well, he needs a 'boo woo' box especially for him. BOO WOO. Anyway.
"You can wear you new white shoes in the muddy afternoon," sang Conor Oberst, on one of his loveliest and most underrated solo songs. Meanwhile, back in the land of living hell, Luke S, Conor and Sara, already whining about quitting as she walks in the door to the white room, enter the much hyped white room task, which they couldn't even bother to fix to get one 'outsider' in there so anyone gave a shit. Dur.
I live on white food anyway, so I'd be alright.
I listened to all three hours of the interview with Tom from last year on the Big Brother Gossip show (search on Itunes, I don't want to link cos I don't want to spoilerise BBUSA for myself) at work today. God, he goes on a lot. It was still quite interesting though; like how he wasn't allowed to speak to his family much when they let him out for his granddad's funeral and stuff and all the bits they cut out and stuff.
Becky LITERALLY this and LITERALLY that. Shut it! I wish you weren't there either. Oh Luke A, stop moaning, you're getting on my wick. Have faith in yourself. What sort of soldier are you? A tin one!
They should play some Basshunter in the white room. Eww, eating in the bath.
Oh Deana, stop going on about being fat. It doesn't win you girl votes.
Is Luke kissing Ashleigh's herpes-covered mouth? Romance isn't dead between these two; pasta, spots, cum-rags, it really is love's young dream.
War is a serious matter; the 'soldier' rubbish isn't. Fuck off, Luke, prawny. Is this show extra long tonight? It's extra boring so far.
HORROR CORRIDOR. I wish whoever walked down it would get evaporated. Corridors of glower. I wish there was a secret house in that white corridor, full of the housemates we deserved instead of this rabble.
Scott is a fool for dropping out of the task so eagerly. I think he thinks the public doesn't like him and he doesn't want to win that way. I would like this task 100% more if Scott was in it. I couldn't care less who wins out of Luke S, Conor or Sara.  I hope the white drink they have to drink is spunk.
What's up with Sara? Pull yourself together. It's like 'I survived beyond and back' in that white room. Her lipstick looks good, though. The white room is flattering to the complexion, like the Apprentice boardroom. It reminds me of that Shattered show that Dermot did where they couldn't sleep and all started hallucinating.
I do understand what Luke A is saying about 'I want to be saved legit' but I think he's still seething.
Conor wants to 'give something back.' I hope it's the money if he wins to Refuge. Sara is really bugging me with her quitty attitude. Where's the Deana-style girl power?
Adam looks all young and cheeky when they flash his face up in between sections. That house has dragged him down.
Luke and Scabby are not going to get a flat together. What do you miss about Luke S, Ashleigh? Is it his sparkling wit or his modesty?
Even when Conor's giving someone a pep talk he's argumentative. He's trying to psych them out to leave.
LOL to Deana being expelled from four schools. What for?!
Scott: 'I don't want to be Luke S.' I don't think even Luke S does anymore.
I don't find Ashleigh very domineering. I just find her quite irritating. Wait until Ashleigh sees the photos of Lauren in Nuts magazine; she'll be seething. No one's going to want to see her scabby old bits.
I like the fact Sara is staying in the white room purely for the undies. Can't she just press Luke S's button for him? It's like the bullshit button on Richplanet.net. Do they think we were born yesterday?
Luke looks like the gayest stormtrooper on the Death Star.
What luxuries are they going to get in the white room: cocaine and milkybars? Conor looks like Friar Tuck today. He's being a dick. Who cares about a massage? He's being so childish!
They've very excited about ice cream and marshmallow. Imagine how excited they'd be if they really got cocaine?
Who cares if Sara said she likes stripping? She just said it to get in the house. Luke A and Adam are imaginingthat very scenario.
Ashleigh calling Deana 'a horrible piece of work' and Becky calling her 'disgusting.' Keep talking! Keep digging your jealous little hole, Danielle Lloyd and Jade. Keep dialling, nation.
LOL to 'men want to be me, men want to be with me.' Robot rock! I like it when Deana takes the mickey.
That white room is like an asylum. Are they even going to turn the lights off at night?
Deana's skin isn't looking so hot at the moment, either. I think it's that house, it can't be good having that air con on you, all the time.
White fact fans: In Malice in Wonderland, Danny Dyer plays the white rabbit character called 'Whitey'. Superhans and Dennis Pennis also star. That film rocks.

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