Tuesday, 2 July 2013

Big Brother 2013: There's more to life than cigarettes and moaning

I'm on edge because I can't get my cat in and I'm not allowed to shout for him because my neighbour has a baby! How lovely, but what about my CAT? Grr.
I don't like it when things are all out of order because they cut to the house for the live evictions etc. Talking of out of order, have you heard that there's supposedly a twist to save Wolfy? If so, the producers must be demented. It's making me want to switch off and I write a blog and do a podcast about this shit. I was really looking forward to getting her out this week. I just don't get their thought process and I don't think I ever will. Am I mental and Wolfy and the twins are really lovely, jovial fun-time housemates? Somehow I doubt it. Why are they ruining the enjoyment of people watching the show? They could have cleaned up on a vote to evict Wolfy this week. The other housemates will never save Gina or Dexter. We can only hope they save Dan and then we can still boot Wolfy out. But it's too many ifs for my liking. When I told my boyfriend about it, he goes 'I'm not watching anymore.' He will, but I bet he's not the only one that feels like that. What with pulling the live feed and then pulling these tricks, they really have no respect for the game or the fans. It makes me sad.
Ha, got my cat in. I win.
Dexter's giving Dan a compliment. Fair enough, it's insincere, but no need to pull a face, Dan. Gina doesn't like Wolfy? I thought they were 'best friends'. Gina: 'There's more to life than cigarettes and moaning.' Are you sure?
Dan, the old sage of the house. Callum: I hope they play 'Womaniser' when he leaves the house. He's so DESPERATE for approval! Take a leaf out of Gina's 'don't give a fuck' book. It's classier.
I love the perplexed faces when Gina, Dexter and Dan get told off for nominating. They're not getting family photos! Dexter was obviously made in a lab anyway.
LOL to Hazel to the twins: 'oh my God, your parents are really good looking!' Queen of subtlety that one.
My boyfriend would be being sick if he was here at the family photos, he hates that stuff and the letters. Don't get sentimental, it always ends up drivel. Dexter on the family photos: 'it shows weakness.' That's exactly what I want from a housemate - a black heart!
Oh God, STFU about cigarettes! Dan criticising Wolfy for not bringing enough in. Isn't he the dude who ran out already? I love Dan's face towards Wolfy. I hate her as much as he does. I like Gina and Dan palling up. They can be team A-hole.
Dexter is an idiot trying to strategise about nominations. You're not on BBUS!
Noms AGAIN. Zzzz. Well, you can't say Jackie wasn't frank. Charlie's face was funny. She should nominate her mum. I can't be fucked to comment on all this again. Hold on, I missed the twins saying 'we're fed up of throwing that dog a bone' about Dexter. How gross! I can't stand them. The way they speak about Dexter is disgusting. Get back behind the deli counter, you little turds. I'm sick of the sight of you.
Nothing personal, Wolfy, just business.
Haha, Dan throwing his toys out of the pram about being nominated. It's up to Callum who he's closer to! That's no way to win an argument, Dan. We all know you hate Callum. Ha, Dan giving twins the stink eye, too. Dan on Callum: 'he's not genuinely nice but I am.' Neither of you are!
And now we come to Wolfy's downfall; or would be if the producers can keep their wooden spoon out. I quote: 'I know I'm going to be saved anyway so I don't give a shit.' Pride comes before a booting!
LOL, Dan is quoting the rule book. Get Vinnie Jones in, he'll suss it out.
Dan has got his little notebook out again! 'Tell me everything you know about Gina.' Well, boobs up to her chin, long fake hair like a dog that's been in a ravine and 14 inches of make up. Is that OK?
Ooh, Dan is being a real douche! I wish he'd STFU, I want Wolfy to go, not him.
Ah, Wolfy continues: 'Don't worry G, I aint going nowhere.' I could enjoy this more if I wasn't shitting myself that the idiot sheep are going to save her tomorrow. Thanks BB for ruining the show AGAIN!
Twin: 'we can only hope it's Dexter.' FUCK OFF. Wolfy: 'the public are going to see that Dan's been calling me an actress.' The public don't care about that, they're more concerned with you being an uber cunt. 
Wolfy: 'I aint even bothered in the slightest.' I wish I could say the same.
Ha, Charlie telling her mum to say how she feels at the time and not to let it all out at once. That's exactly what my mum does, a massive build up and an explosion.
Dan, stop floundering and keep your mouth shut. Why is Gina having a go at Callum? I don't get it. But I'm also so tired of Callum's 'woe is me' face. Callum has permanently got a 'well, I've done my best' expression on. I don't get what they're arguing about, I really don't. Everyone just shut up and let Wolfy dig her own grave, please.
Why is Dexter being nice to Dan!? Dan has done nothing but treat Dexter like crap! Nice guy wars! 'Awkward niceness'! Better than interrogating not-niceness.
Hazel, Dexter got SAVED BY US, THICKO. Why don't you just shut up. You add NOTHING to the show.
Dan calling people 'patronising' and 'cocksure'. Funny! He's REALLY upset about being on the block, bless him. 
Gina calling Wolfy Judas! Not everyone DID vote for Dexter, actually, Hazel, Gina didn't.
Wolfy: 'I'm your biggest competition. Everyone knows I'm going to make it to the final.' Did you see Dexter smirk when she said it? Only an imbecile would make such a statement. Only someone the public despise.
Why does Wolfy feel like she 'deserves to be there'? She deserves to be kicked in the backside.
This whole episode was people just niggling at each other and it actually made me feel anxious. That's not good. Evil is triumphing over good. There isn't even any good, but evil is still winning. It's just like Conor all over again. They are going to give Wolfy a crown and a suitcase full of cigarettes and probably a fucking sainthood.
Voting lines are still not open. So who goes? Big Brother decides. Don't you ever forget it.

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