Tuesday 18 October 2011

Big Brother 2011 - We've become legends

I've got a friend round who doesn't have a TV and hasn't watched one episode. He's already laughing at 'This house was built on a burial site.' Fact. He also says Marcus is hamming it up since the old days.
No one wants your £110 trainers, Jay.
Louise: 'I love going into a butchers and smelling the meat.' Gross! Butchers smell like death. Murder! Do you know how animals die, Louise?
Look at Aaron's bad taste tattoos. They look like 90s tattoos.
Nominations! Yay. I avoided the result again. Very easy. Anton admits he's got no dignity. Well, we knew that.
Anton's irrelevant nominations! Boo. Play ball, naughty. Ooh, Louise is nominating a man. Weird. Louise is nominating Faye because she wants to have a chat with her. WTF.
Lots of nomination talk today. Crack down, BB! Nice threads, Harry. I'm sure Tim Henman's dad would love them.
I like Anton being nominated by Jem for 'cackling to himself.' A wrestler is intimidated by Jay! He's not punched a pillow in a week now.
OMG Jay doing a poo with the door open! I've seen it all now. Did he say 'I'm coming out'? Strange way to do it! My friend is horrified! I've already appalled him tonight by suggesting dolphins lay eggs, now this. I'm never going to live down my lowbrow lifestyle.
Why is Faye nominating wrapped in that beige towel? Ick.
Interesting Alex nominated Aaron for his mood swings, I'm surprised he didn't get more. I'm thrilled that Anton and Jay are up!
Louise and Jay are pure toilet, with her farts and his poops.
It's been quite a funny BB so far tonight. Tom and Alex's imaginary hair salon. Please let Jay cut his pinkie off. I'd like crisps on tap.
Jay is missing his grandma. No, just her dumplings. Let's see how long this speaking ban lasts.
Even Jay's tomato sauce rantings don't make sense. Plus, they're NOT ALLOWED TO WRITE THINGS.
Jay vs a Pillow 2. The revenge. It's like a bad play. I just said he'd changed his ways! Now he's let us all down again.
I liked Big Brother giving them a taste of their own medicine, cute. Tom; 'I think we should break this silence thing, soon.' I think you already have.
I'm slightly behind on the show and my friend has texted me to say 'this twist is a kick in the groin'. I'm intrigued now. Kick 'em both out! Go eat granny's dumplings.
Jay and Anton deserve to be put in a crypt. Bedsit times! I don't want them to change the noms! I was looking forward to another wolf scalp on my wall this week.
Are they going to get some food in the afterlife? I hate this pair, I don't want them to have that power. It's like a poisoned bedsit! Bedshit! Down at the bottom of the garden/ amongst the birds and the bees/ a little lot of little tossers/ they call the Wolfpack disease! I like their little black outfits, but it's not as good as when Emma's top kept falling down.
Is it going to be Fight Night 2? I hope Jay nuts someone and gets kicked out. I like that crypt, just seal up the doors and leave them in there.
Are they feeding them Halloween sweeties in that crypt? I think they're eating skulls filled with goop and pumpkin bubblegum.
This is a good twist, it's been a particularly good episode tonight. It's just a shame about the two people up for nomination, as it's skewed things in the wrong direction.
'It's been two hours since Jay and Anton went to their graves.' If only. I like those headphones they're wearing.
Don't invoke rule 13, Big Brother. Who do you think you are, Vinnie Jones?
Love Anton and Jay patting their hearts to show the love. But will they be showing the love when they go back in? Who will be wielding the knife ala Victor? Will Tom do a Marco? Who will be shown the door?
Also, isn't it fishy, possibly, that on the first week Aaron isn't up Anton essentially 'throws' the nominations? How would things have been different if Aaron and Anton were in the crypt?
I hope this pans out this week. And don't get me wrong, I hope it's explosive. But I hope the fallout sways in the right direction.
In the meantime, Jay and Anton: I aren't Legend.

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