Friday, 9 June 2017

Big Brother UK 2017: Mate, the world's round

So why bother voting when the people's prick Tom gets to decide who goes out of the bottom two? And why is it all the best people are on the block. If Raph or Arthur go, I riot. I'm a one woman riot right now.
What shape are Emma's earrings? Oblangle? Looks like she's about to go parachuting, too.
Who cares if girls at the gym wear make up! Stop subjagating make up wearers!
Arthur wants to have a wank to 'get that energy out.' Arthur and Lotan have a wank plan. Is it to toss each other off? Kayleigh told him to do it in the pool. Um!
Rebecca is upset she can't wear make up, even though she's still wearing mascara. Boo hoo.
Arthur and Rebecca in the bath together talking about Keiran. Arthur: 'You said you've just given him a blowjob.'
Arthur: 'What is it that ticks your boxes?' Arthur is a character.
Rebecca: 'Keiran needs another 15 years of mucking about.' Arthur: 'By that time you'll literally be dead.' Lol.
You can't win with this task. You have to argue for or against so it's not like your true opinion.
Sukhvinder: 'Climate change is made up. People think the earth is a globe.'
Flashback: Imran: 'The world is flat and there's an outside world that's full of ice.' Oh my god. Do people actually think like this? Oh. my. god.
One in, one out policy for immigration. Like four in, four out on Big Brother in the glittery toilet roll of doom.
Why is Joe being so rude when Rebecca is talking? I agree you shouldn't have kids if you can't afford them, but it's unenforcable so we just have to suck it up. We can't exactly just let babies starve to death (unless we're Teresa May).
Tom thinks we needs a 'vote off' about Brexit. Can we have a vote off about him?
Chanelle comparing Brexit to taking a handbag back. Show your receipts!
Chanelle: 'Oxo layer.' Save it for the 'fake Jade Goody of the week' section of the podcast. Seems like she's making some good points to me!
Why is Joe so grumpy about talking about politics?!
Why does everyone look like they're in their undies? Charlotte... Sukvinder.
Arthur: 'The real question is why do you think the world is flat. The world is round cos I met a bloke who sailed round the world.' Is that your only proof? Hahaha.
Arthur: 'Mate the world's round.'
Sukhvinder: 'I don't want to talk about the flat earth!'
Arthur: 'No cos it's fucking bonkers, love.'
Sukhvinder: 'I don't hang around with fucking morons.' (Ironic)
Arthur: 'Well don't walk too far that way love, or you'll fall of the fucking edge.' Just the best line. You couldn't scriptwrite it.
It's not threatening behaviour challenge ignorant views, Imran. They were soooo touchy about it! Sukvinder goes: 'I'm a big personality and Imran's... um... got a character of his own.' Lol. Talk about crackpot. I didn't even think people had views like that. Absolutely mental.
Why did Arthur start on one of the sisters then? Ha. 
The house voted Labour. Shame they weren't outside voting.
What is the point in telling the housemates the results of the election. Like these fuckwits understand anything. They think the EARTH IS FLAT.
Deborah is taking on Arthur by sitting in between Tom and Arthur. Not exactly pressing the nuclear button is it. He thinks it's a 2D coversation like the flat earth.
Arthur reiterating that Deborah is a rubbish housemate. He rephrased it as 'you're a bad housemate' as they didn't like the world 'rubbish'. The Sun put Jeremy Corbyn in a bin on the front cover this week, so get some perspective. Like that on the Earth.
Arthur: 'What do you want to do, sit and have some backward conversation about politics?'
Hannah saying Arthur's irrelevant and chanting 'who are you' at Arthur is like Jackie trying to take on Ika Wong.
Arthur getting a frosty reception from 'the Earth is flat' brigade in the kitchen. I love Arthur's facial expressions.
Deborah: 'Arthur's really rude.' True, he's mute as fuck.
Why is Emma being so cunty about Arthur! Stop that.
Arthur to Deborah: I would quite like your sister to go.' OMG. He's shameless! It looked like he was going to say sorry, haha.
Mandy is so gross leering over Keiran and 'Leighton'. Mummy sandwich. I'm allergic to wheat since Teresa May ran through those fields.
Imran is rulebooking about Arthur drawing a dick on the wall in nail varnish. Yes, I did just write that sentence. Imran: 'Why are you writing on the wall?' Arthur: 'We're just another brick in it.' OMG. He's a BB legend.
Rebecca and Keiran are desperately trying to cobble a storyline together. Keiran: 'Don't play mindgames with me love.'
Arthur: 'What's the first rule of Arthur's house... don't have a go at Arthur... be yourself and fight fire with fire.'
Tom: 'I'd love to know what your thoughts are about me.' She can't stand you. Charlotte: 'You don't offend me or anything.' He thinks her mum is standing in the way of them getting it on. Can't see it happening. If he evicts her mum, her daughter isn't going to run into your arms, Tom. Charlotte: 'I'm far filthier than her.' I doubt it.
Lotan is teaching Arthur to striptease. Don't.
The crowd cheering seems very quiet.
Imran and Mandy are the only two not safe. So Tom has to piss off either Charlotte or Sukhvinder.
He has to tell Imran why he thinks he's not been saved, that's a bit mean. OMG he's gonna evict the mum.
Ha, Imran has to say why Tom should evict Mandy. not why he should save you.
Mandy: 'You need a rich mix in this house.' That would mean Imran then!
Mandy is such a sore loser. I'm SO glad she went over Imran. The people's housemate finally got it right! Took him all week, the thick fuck.
May saying Tom has a 'gameplan' and talking about about 'throwing people under the bus.' Tom is not smart enough to have a gameplan.
Emma: 'Why did he evict you tonight?' Cos he wants to fuck her daughter. 
Mandy saying Tom sees Charlotte as a challenge. Tom would sleep with anyone who would say yes I think.
Mandy, all you did was be creepy, entitled and a bitch. BYE.
Podcast incoming later if you can stay up til about 3am! Hopefully I can.

1 comment:

n.k. said...

n.k. caught up with the podcast lovin your new chum,you two are a right laugh,keep goin we all appreciate your efforts.