Wednesday, 16 May 2007

The Apprentice- Ta-ra Guzzle

So was she Gazal? Gisele? Or Guzzle, as she was called by Tre in the final five minutes. Either way, her thousand-yard stare didn't stop her getting Sir Alan's gigantic trainer up her rear end. Do you think if I just call him 'Alan' in my blog I'll be arrested or something? It's possible.
Tonights task was to design a trainer. The imaginitive juices truly flowed as Team Grumpy thought of 'Street' in a gaudy green design and Team Bitches came up with an abstract looking 'Jam'. Methinks the kidz would not be so impressed. And giving money to charity? I think they'd rather spend £4 on knives and crack.
Tre was back to his usual bolshy, disapproving self this week, pouring scorn on everything and bigging himself up. If he's so damn good at everything, why does he never do anything?
Miss Piggy was her usual sneering, snobbish self. I really want to break her nose. I very much enjoyed ALAN repeatedly calling her a loser. LOSER! LOSER!
The true star of the night was of course, Simon. He was like an enthusiastic kid with his borederline offensive characature rapping and ridiculous breakdancing.
Margaret's comment was genius- 'If Sir Alan wants a acrobatic rapper Simon's his man'. And if he wants a sour-faced, gash-mouthed Pat Butcher prototype, I'd say you're his woman, Margaret.


Ossian said...

that comment about margaret really made me laugh. i agree about miss priggy.

Red said...

I think Simon fancied himself as a bit of a Craaaaaig David, with that woolly hat on and his "street" lingo/accent.

* (asterisk) said...

I thought Tre was rad in this ep. He came up with everything except the song, virtually. And I loved that he said Guzzle. That was weird. Was it some veiled reference to how much head she's been giving in the house? Ooh er, that's how rumours start...

Margaret's a fucking loon, ain't she? "So, what are 'Beat Boys'?" "Nah, B-Boys, innit. They're like breakdancers, an' that." Like she's any the wiser.

And what was with not putting any colour on those shoes at all, except a poxy logo?! Bizarre.

lightupvirginmary said...

People dragging their blistered feet across broken glass strewn streets (a bit like Jade's mum when they kicked her out of BB) still wouldn't wear either pair of those bloody trainers.

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