Tuesday, 10 June 2014

Big Brother 2014: I feel like I've let my country down

Tamara: 'I like your hair like that' to Winston. I don't like Winston's hair like anything. It's shocking. Winston seems harmless, though. If Danielle wanted to do something really useful for womankind, she'd tell him off for saying bird. She probably thinks it's endearing, though.
Why does Kimberly like Danielle? I don't get it. Kimberly seems sane. I don't get this whole suitcase thing. I didn't even know they didn't even have their suitcases. Don't care much either. Shred, shred shred.
Danielle doesn't want sex talk 'in the presence of ladies.' Who does she think she is, David Walliams? She needs a parasol to hide under. Pass the smelling salts, m'lady!
I've realised evicting Tamara is the only way to stick it to Helen's crew; they've got the numbers and they need cutting down. Tamara is pretty harmless so far, but imagine the faces. It's worth it for that alone.
More finger blasting talk. I've never heard this expression before Big Brother. It's pretty grim, like someone's stripping wallpaper. Danielle: 'Lads will be lads' but apparently there's different rules for what women can talk about. She's not really helping herself, is she. Every part of me wants to evict her. But I know I'll regret it!
This task is obviously going to be shameful. I wouldn't 'act sexy' cos Big Brother told me to. Fuck, now I sound like Danielle.
Kimberly reminds me of Courtney Stodden moaning about her clothes. Toya is rocking the blue lipstick. I've never seen anyone work blue or black lipstick, hats off.
Pauline is just being cruel lording it over her power. I hope she's up next week. Ooh, we're onto the noms already. Mark and Helen looked upset Tamara was up, so that's a good reason to ditch Tamara. Ugh, Pauline's smug face again! It was bad enough last time.
OK, so Danielle started it with 'maybe it's cos I'm not being a fucking slag.' At least we know now. Oh it was Steven that shitstirred and told the others! Naughty. It's always a guy in the middle doing that and then they walk away all innocent!
Ha, Danielle immediately denying what she said. 'Fuck off you fucking idiot, do you know who you're talking to.' LOL. Helen: 'Get a wash and a hairbrush, you fat bitch.' Charming.
Surely 'I'm going to knock her out' is a threat? Revoke the pass to the finals! We can't put up with this woman until the finals. At least Doolally Danielle is entertaining. Helen is just rough.
Danielle is cracking up in the diary room because she knows her mask has slipped. Danielle wasn't calling Helen a slag specifically, I don't think. I think she was just calling all the sexually active women slags, lol.
How has Danielle got so many friends in the house, I just don't get it? There's nothing likeable about her, she's drab in mind, body and spirit. Are they seeing something we don't? Is it in the edit?
What is Pauline going on about?! She's the wooden spoon and then some. Jale IS actually handling herself well. Pauline is just Vinnie Jones in a dress. Well, jeggings.
I'm glad Chris isn't afraid to be honest about Pauline in the DR. I hope he has the balls to nominate her. There's going to be a serious divide this year and you need to make sure you're on the right side of the crack, fast. And if the wrong person gets the power next, God help us, and God help the viewing figures. Kimberly; good luck trying to get some sense out of that rotten old cunt Helen. I can't bear people who won't accept people's apologies. It takes a lot to apologise. Helen is a gigantic bitch in more ways than one. She is a humourless giraffe. Helen: "I don't want your apology, stick it up your fucking arse.' Danielle's best response to this would have been, 'What, like you did with Wayne Rooney's cock?' But she's too classy (!) for that. Now I've sunk to this level. See what this show does to you?
BBashleigh seems like she might be alright, you know, if she ever gets to fucking speak. I still don't get why her and Kimberly are hanging round with Danielle, she a dead woman walking. The bitchy crowd are going to gang up on them and it's going to be game over, just like what happened to Benedict and Lauren.
I guess BB is going to have to fix who gets the next power, right? Let's hope it's someone with the sense to put Pauline up, and watch her minions disperse.

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