Tuesday, 24 June 2014

Big Brother 2014: Casting you with the same brush

Right everyone calm the fuck down and put your true colours away before we see them. Cos if we see them; God help you! Argh! *puts sunglasses on*
Danielle: 'I don't know why you've put such rude, nasty people in here.' Me either. It's depressing. I can't work out who's aligned to who again this week. Danielle is being quite pathetic, not liking Kim anymore because she's friendly with Helen.
Has Helen got something in her eye? The rotten hag is leaking. She's doing some good victim blaming in the garden. Why has Kimberly aligned with horrid Helen? Oh, cos of Steven. Ugh.
Can't they cancel out Pauline's pass to the final for Helen now she's gone? Please, spare us. Who goes, we decide? Not so much.
Toya is HAPPY about being up for nomination. Pull the other one. Ugh Big Brother is so school yard tonight, girls bitching at each other. Boring. Kimberly is so patient with Danielle. Danielle needs a good shake. Ashleigh is getting as miserable as Danielle.
Another task with a twist - zzz. And another task with gunk! Zzz. And another task with no imagination - standard. Eggs, fish, gunk. Chris looks how I feel.
Winston banging his spoon against a cup like he's in prison is more interesting than what Toya's saying. Danielle on Kim and Steven: 'I don't care.' Why WOULD you care!? You clearly DO care. I don't think Danielle has ever had a boyfriend. I doubt if anyone would book her for a photshoot with Kim because she looks like hell. It looks like she hasn't washed her hair for three weeks.
Dear God, Danielle is being so out of order to Kim, slagging her off to Ashleigh. What a messed up person she is, she needs some hardcore therapy.
Nice to see Danielle letting her (greasy) hair down for once. Braveheart! A fellow homophobe (Mel Gibson, that is).
OMG Steven is so cringeworthy, and I hate that word, but he just IS. Kimberly's face when he kissed her on the cheek was a picture. Ugh, Steven telling her to let go. Maybe she doesn't WANT to let go! She IS cold. But I kind of like that about her.
Ashleigh: 'Why should gay people have to come out?' Er... so people know who they are? It's easy for straight people to say that but most gay people DO have to come out. It's not as easy as it is for her and she shouldn't think it is. It's just lip service.
Is Danielle coming onto Winston with her 'spotless house' talk? Talk about an easy target with Winston. I can't roll my eyes far enough at her one rule for me and women but I'm fairly sure she's making it up, so that makes it easier to listen to.
The pool is quite big this year, isn't it? Wasted on these arseholes. 'Come on, you bastards!' etc. At least they're having a laugh now, except a few miseries in the kitchen, including my favourite, Matthew.
Marlon having a quick grope of Danielle there. I'm surprised she didn't smack him one. 'I could crack that nutcracker.' He's all charm, isn't he?
Hold up, who's in the shower together there? Someone call Pauline! It's Kim, Jale and Chris in there. Filthy fuckers. A threesome!
Toya stop going on about your mum. And is Ashleigh not allowed to have fun cos she's got a boyfriend? She is seriously sour.
I like Kimberly's knitted onesie type thing. I don't like Big Brother at the moment. Also, there's too many people up for eviction again. There's nothing at stake when there's eight people on the block. I want to see an old school style head to head. I suppose there's about as much chance of that as the live feed coming back. Fuck you, Big Brother. We were gonna do a mid-week podcast tonight but we're too depressed - enough said really.

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