It was the men's turn for ritual humiliation last night, and after complaining about the fannies the day before, I have to say, the willies weren't much to look at either. Why can't our sexual organs be a bit... sexier?
There was also a bit about sex toys yesterday. The presenter acted like she's never seen a gag or a dildo before. How ridiculous to say a guy can't compete with a vibrator! I find the human attached to the end of a penis to be be quite useful for, you know, going out and getting me a bag of chips after. Oh, and you know, the odd conversation.
Tonight they looked at if 'the porn star look' affects how 'normal' women look. Fearndia Cotwink (I haven't learnt her name yet) went to meet some very unrepresentative women who spend a grand a month on hair extensions and said things about 'pleasing my man'. After that FC decided to have a 'porn star makeover' which involved fake tan, falsh nails and so on (it was more of a WAG makeover). Then she went 'do I feel sexy, no I feel like a slag.' Nice! What a great word to put into teenager's heads, hearty congratulations. One thing you aint is a feminist. But you did look like a drag queen. Personally I don't care if other women want to look 'glam' or 'natural'- what's it got to do with sex, really? Not much. It's just about judging women, as ever. She said 'do you like what the porn look says about you?' but it's not a 'porn look'; some women just like dressing up, like the Snog, Marry, Avoid lot. If people judge you on that, I say fuck 'em.
The condom class was quite useful; why hasn't something better been invented by now? They're pretty rubbish aren't they? All that effort and squeaky latex; urgh. I'd rather not bother. It seems like they rip really easily, too! I think someone needs to sort this out; possibily in the Dragon's Den.
The porn star she interviewed said he does 'gay for pay'; but how does he get a hard on? Would viagra do it? I don't get it. Oh... my boyfriend explained it to me. You can go gay for pay... but only if you fancy it a bit.
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