Well, this is going well before it's even begun. One: I've got laryngitis so can't speak. Not being able to speak is rubbish. It makes me realise just how much crap I talk and how much I like giving my opinion on EVERYTHING. So I have a feeling that might make me channel all my anger through my fingertips into a giant splurge. I'm also coughing up bits of the back of my throat and look like something off the Walking Dead. I didn't even blog the Speidi doc (sob). Two: my boyfriend has stomped off into the bedroom declaring 'I won't have it on in the house.' Make that the same room. So now I've got feeling like crap, plus feeling guilty on my hands. Three: it's the Brits. It's my tradition to write a bilious blog about it, and I'll be damned if I let a horrible illness stop me. I'm already suffering, so what's a little extra?
So I heard James Corden might be ill, too, and that Chris Evans might be hosting. At least Chris Evans was relevant once, right? Even if he does write that really smug column about going to country pubs and playing golf now.
So opening the show in usual understated style is Muse. Remember Plug In Baby? That was a good song. Not sure how many light years ago that was now. I used to have a poster out of Just 17 on my wall of the guy from Muse, and he looked attractive. I'm serious!
Ugh, Corden is there. Isn't Russell Brand in the country? Shall I just say ALL THE SAME THINGS I say EVERY YEAR? Well if they will wheel out this far prick every year, what do you expect? Oh my God. Mumford and Sons. I'm strongly considering joining the resistance in the bedroom.
Mumford #1 says he 'enjoys doubling the size of the window people get to look in.' That will come in handy in your next job. I always say it, but I honestly thought they were a joke band at first, and they've done nothing to change my opinion. Plus James Corden says he loves them. Enough said. I thought he'd lost weight? Also, why have they redesigned the Brit Award as Cath Kidston's vibrator this year?
Taylor Swift. Where's Kanye on the only occasion you'd EVER need him? Cut to 1D's Harry Styles. Taylor looks like Bug Bunny. She's introducing Best British Female Solo Artist. Has anyone ever heard a Paloma Faith song? Me neither. She's just famous for wearing bits of old carpet. Amy Winehouse? Pretty sure she died over a year ago, are we that hard up? Mitch Winehouse is more relevant. Oh my god, Emile Sande. That is the worst type of music on the planet. I'd rather be forced to watch that programme about a chicken shop on a loop for 24 hours than listen to one of her pathetic, middle-of-the-road dirges. Can't WAIT for her acceptance speech! She makes Corrine Bailey Rae look like Pussy Riot. James Corden attempts to talk to those little slags out of One Direction. They are REALLY EXCITED about the tour starting. Yeah, really excited about all the pussy, to quote that little runt Styles. That's twice I've used the word 'pussy' in one paragraph now (three times, now, actually).
OMG Robbie Williams. This is too much. Someone up there is trying to finish me off. I hope he falls off that step and knocks his front teeth out. I actually mean 'breaks his neck' but I'm trying to build up to that level of vitriol, and he's stealing my thunder. Is this the 'Ring of roses' one? FFS. Shoot me now. Just take me out with the horsemeat burgers and donkey lasagnes and dump me in a fucking ditch. I should DEFINITELY have started watching this half an hour early. I've really fucked myself. There are people playing tubas onstage and Robbie Williams is still the most odious thing in sight. Revolting. Someone drop the bomb, quick, you get him and James Corden for the price of one.
What the hell has happened to Simon Pegg? He looks like a little rat. I used to like him. Back around the time I used to like Muse. And what's he doing with Liz Hurley? Best British Group. Is it someone I hate? Who the hell are Alt-J? The XX, that's a bit last year, isn't it? I'm vaguely up on new music thanks to Song Pop, now, ha. And One Direction and Mumford and Sons doesn't really cover it. Mumford and Sons sounds like a business Alex Polizzi goes to sort out on The Fixer. Like a failing furniture shop.
Nick Grimshaw: are they actively trying to put people on the stage who are more odious than James C? They still failed but only just. Best British Breakthrough. Why are there only four nominations in every category? Rita Ora's been out for ages. Seriously, is this the best they can do? Someone who looks like they're trying to cover up their bald patch with an elaborate comb-over won it.
Oh dear, I've got a bad feeling I'm not going to have a good word to say about this whole night.
Christ, Dave Grohl's just turned up plugging something or other. Kurt Cobain's 46th birthday perhaps? Cue Courtney: 'when the drummer tries to sing!!!!' LOL. It's lucky my boyfriend has left the room. He really wouldn't tolerate this. He was upset enough when Dave Grohl didn't get a slap off that deer in that 15-year-old QOTSA video. Fucking hell, is Dave Grohl sitting with Simon Cowell?
Plan B, don't give up the day job! No seriously, I sat through a bit of that Sweeney, and I've sat through several Danny Dyer films, and you can't even compare. To Danny Dyer. Or Jason Statham, even.
LOL to the person behind James C looking at his watch as he introduced old spud-face himself, Justin Timberlake. Seriously, I thought this guy's wheeze would be up years ago; he makes Spencer Pratt look attractive, and the high point of his career was splitting up with Britney before the umbrella period. All of his songs sound exactly the same. Lord knows what's going on with his hair right now. I'm guessing he's had it relaxed because we all remember the NSYNC-advert-for-Frizz-Ease stage. This twat has also got a tuba. 'So smooth'? He never used to be. You can't airbrush a hairdo like that out of history, Trousersnake.
The way Paloma Faith talks gets right on my wick, and I bet I'm not the only one. The human condition; oh go fuck yourself. She's like a human condition: dandruff. What sort of music is that anyway? The sort no one likes.
Oh dear, Ed Sheeran, ginger and that shiny suit really do not go well together. Best British Male - Ben someone. Who is this mumbler? Yeah Emeli, please do have some time off, I'm sick of the sight of you. Oh dear, my boyfriend just came in as Ed Sheeran was on TV, the one person he specifically said he would not tolerate. This Brits is actually more trouble than it's worth, it's like being caught watching some race hate or something.
Dermot and Sharon Osborne are the first two people who've turned up on that stage that I haven't felt searing hatred for. Sharon is sniffing like she's just been backstage with Conor Oberst. International Solo Artist. Anyone but Alicia Keys? I'm glad Lana Del Rey won it out of that lot. Although I'd say her bubble burst last year.
I always disliked One Direction, obviously, but at least I used to fancy Zayn. I can't even fancy him anymore since he's been revealed as a love rat. Are they murdering Blondie? Oh well, rather her than something I hold dear. They're struggling with the low notes somewhat. Oh it's a medley. Teenage Kicks as well? I'm sure Twitter is up in arms. I'm not bothered. Teenage Kicks gets on my nerves. Teenage pricks.
Sorry, I just paused to try and think of something positive to say. But I can barely breathe through my nose or mouth. Positive thoughts is just pushing it. Oh God, aren't we done with Emili Sande already? *cries*
I am ambivalent towards Jack Whitehall just because he wants everyone to hate him. Best British Live Act. Is it Muse? It normally is. Oh no, it's Coldplay. Has Chris Martin not even bothered to show up? Too busy covered in poster paint, no doubt.
OK I'm really losing the will to live now, I'm not sure I'm going to make to the end of this. Best British Single. Is it Stooshe? Isn't that the one about loving someone who beats you up? That's a good metaphor for this stupid programme. Except without the love. I've never even heard that Adele Skyfall song. She couldn't even be bothered to show up. I don't blame her. Oh how we laugh at the 'controversy' of last year. Zzzzzz.
Taylor Swift looks like she's just risen from the crypt. Oh, is that the idea? I'm seven minutes behind now and it's hard to know whether to fast forward this or the adverts. Oh, she went all Ann Summers at the end. Original! Madonna just called, she wants her panties back.
My boyfriend has just joined us with the remark: 'only a licensed cunt would watch this.' Then Robbie Williams came back on.
James Corden on Dave Grohl: 'men want to be him, women want to be with him.' I think you'll find 99 out of 100 women would rather be with Kurt Cobain's 46-year-old corpse.
I made a sandwich during James Corden's cringeworthy 'conversation' with Alt J, but they were characters weren't they? Like Union J without the looks, or a LCD Soundsystem police line-up. It was even funnier when they started talking.
Seriously, who got James Corden back after last year? He's useless. He's never made me laugh once. Ever. He makes Sam Fox look competent and Mick Fleetwood look like he can read.
My boyfriend is now declaring he is a 'war child' and watching this is worst than anything those kids went through. Ha, is that Damon Albarn. Alex James is looking rough, LOL. I'm surprised they've got Albarn back after last year. My boyfriend is now chanting 'Parklife' and going 'James Corden could do with a bit of famine.' I think it might have been easier when he was in the other room.
I just told him my Mumford and Sons joke from earlier and he went, 'Even Alex Polizzi would draw the line at this.' Have they got a ukelele? I used to think they were American, then it seemed like the fashion was slightly more forgivable. The lead singer looks like an alcoholic Tony Hadley.
'Pay some respects to Brian Ferry!' cried James Corden, to which my boyfriend replied, 'shall we start with the stag shooting, or the fact he's married to his son's girlfriend?' See, this is why I needed him here for the whole of this blog - so he could write my jokes for me.
1D win the 'Global Success' award; or as it used to be called when Russell Brand won it, 'Shagger of the Year.'
There's only one positive thing I can say about this whole affair and that was that I didn't have to look at Florence or her Machine this year. That's it.
Can you imagine how sadistic you'd have to be to watch the ITV2 show? Almost as sick as if you just ploughed through this blog, you loony. Thank you!
Wednesday, 20 February 2013
Thursday, 14 February 2013
Review: Desaparecidos live at the Electric Ballroom, Camden
.JPG)
After a close call with a conman on Gumtree (don't ever put a request for tickets on there!) I finally got a ticket for £50 on eBay. Quite a lot over the face values of £15 but £15 seemed very low in the first place (it was £30 for Conor solo). I would have paid up to £100 if I'd had the money!
So I met up with the guy selling the ticket outside – thank god he turned up! – and then there I was, at my first ever gig I'd been to alone. I did a smooth manoeuvre to the front; there was a guy at the barrier obviously saving a space for a friend, so I kind of slid into the spot over a period of about five minutes. Come on, you can’t hog barrier, be there, or be usurped. I could tell he was a bit grumpy so I offered him a Tic-Tac (I was on a strict no fluids policy, as I have a pathetically weak bladder) and then I felt I’d made my peace. When his friends did finally turn up there were about 12 of them, so I didn’t feel so bad.
I hadn’t heard of support band Johnny Foreigner, but I admire their name. I think he said, ‘we’re from Chicago’ when he came out in a very-non-Chicago accent, but at the end he admitted they were from Birmingham. I’d describe their sound as a yelpier Bloc Party, and the band had a girl and a black bloke, so it covered all bases. Was good to hear a woman screaming (hold on, that doesn’t sound quite right) and they looked the part. She reminded me of Kylie off Corrie. I enjoyed them and I rarely say that about a support band.
Desa (can I call them that for now, I still struggle to spell it) came on about 9.15, and the place KICKED OFF.
They opened with a new song Left is Right (thanks to Lee who sold me the ticket, because I only had two of the new songs, and he alerted me to two more! I'm a bad fan) and the energy was just crazy. I felt like a young person again!.Conor came out in some hideous stars n stripes sunglasses and the long hair he’s got at the moment and a little stars and stripes neckerchief. I hate his long hair but that’s beside the point. I can honestly say, I think I had the best spot in the house, right in front of where Conor finally came out, and just on the edge of the mad moshpit so whilst I got jostled a fair bit, I didn’t want to kill someone (an occupational hazard at gigs).
Probably the most amazing song was the second one, Happiest Place on Earth, which is one of my favourite songs of all time, it just has the most amazing lyrics, a song about war that you don’t resent for being a song about war. Actually, he’s good at those (see also No one would riot for less and the silly When the President talks to God - notable for me going 'I DOUBT IT!' quite a lot). It was just perfection, and everyone was going mad. I was even headbanging – WTF.
.JPG)
Probably the best thing about Desa is they don’t have any slow songs, every single one is a screamer. So it was a nice contrast to the acoustic gig of the week before. Also, as they only have one album, you knew every song. It’s quite cool to go to a gig where you’ve been listening to that one album for 10 years, never expecting to hear it live, because the band had disbanded. And then when they get back together it’s not a tired old money-making racket like Pulp, for example.At one point Conor played the song $$$$ and limp-wristedly threw some money in the air, that never even got as far as the end of the stage, and at the end of the gig, the bouncer stole it! What a git. It was £35 as well because I could see it sitting there (hey big spender) – that would have covered the extra cost of my ticket! Conor also said he'd been shopping on Camden Market; wish I'd gone there that day!
All of the songs were good (there was a Clash cover which I wasn’t fussed on, but it beats Moon Over Kentucky or whatever crap Morrissey normally tries to inflict). But my favourite has to be Man and Wife, The Latter (Damanged Goods). I must have played that song in my car over a thousand times. It’s just pop perfection. So to hear them play it seemed slightly unreal. The crowd was literally bouncing all over the place, I haven’t been to a gig with energy like that in years. And thank fuck I was on the barrier, or I would have had to run for cover.
It was so nice just to be that close to Conor and not to have to worry about anyone else, but just to do exactly what I wanted. I would definitely recommend going to a gig on your own, it’s fun.The crowd was small as well; there wasn't even a queue. I thought Conor fans would have turned out in droves.
I really pray that Desa put out a new album now, Conor is at his best when he’s screaming or heartbroken, and about as far away from a country guitar as possible. He promised to come back sooner, so don't let us down!
Saturday, 2 February 2013
Big Brother Australia 2012: I need a Valium
Well, it took me about six months, but I just finished Big Brother Australia. The miracle was, I avoided the result until today, too. Avoiding the result of the winner of BBAU might sound like a breeze to you, but as an active member of the 'Big Brother community', it was a fucking arseache. I had to cover my eyes, turn podcasts down, avoid Twitter at certain times. Still, I'm so glad I did. I saved the final episode until tonight because I knew it was going to be a Friday night on my own, and I was absolutely thrilled with the result.
I couldn't get into the show AT ALL at first, and nearly gave up a few times. My boyfriend gave up after two episodes. The accents drove me mad. The host was annoying. Everyone seemed about ten years behind the UK. The 'secrets' secret task went on way too long and the protracted entering of housemates got on my nerves. In fact, I think it was just how cool the house looked that kept me interested for a week. I wanted that house to be the BBUK house. I also liked the wildlife - the weird birds in the garden.
But then something happened. Nothing in particular, I just wanted to watch the next episode, and the next. I didn't even particularly like ANYONE for at least a month. They were all so inoffensive they blended into one, and I felt like they had nothing interesting to say. But I'm so glad I stuck with it.
And what kept me with it was the production. Yes, the production! This show is lovingly made. The tasks were imaginative. The nominations were creative. They fiddled with them, in the form of a 'nominations superpower' and you still didn't object, because they did it in a smart way. The had the 'naughty corner' where you got sent for not wearing your microphone and they'd make you do ironing for a few hours. Big Brother didn't take no shit. I liked his style.
Some of the tasks were absolutely brilliant and they should definitely steal them for our show. The David Attenborough task (WAS it David Attenborough? Sure sounded like him) where the housemates had to dress up as different animals and the voiceover said things like 'Angie is a monkey who likes to smear honey on her face. And through her hair. And then she sits and waits.' and 'Josh has cooked a delicious meal, but George the naughty monkey comes along and steals it' the housemate had to do whatever he said. It was hilarious! The 'unwelcome guests' task was also imspired, where housemates had to ignore people coming into the house, including the narrator of the show who sat on the bed and narrated what happened around him. I'd like to see Marcus Bentley do that. They also had to ignore their own parents and friends. Obviously it breaks the 'no contact with the outside world' rule but that drum broke long ago, didn't it, Rylan?
There was also an amazing 'Tree of Temptation' character (he even spoke like him on a cockney accent) in Surly the puffa fish who set the housemates secret tasks and got insanely jealous of the pet dog (more on her later). He was really funny. What happened to Surly after the show!? The host made a joke about battering him!
The nominations were inspired; housemates stood in a glass nominations booth with the other housemates sitting directly behind them, and had five points to nominate, and they could give one housemate 4 and another 5, or 3 and 2, and so on. It added a great Eurovision feel to the show. Also, Big Brother was really sarky to them when they were nominating, strict on their reasons for nominating, and threatened to throw one housemate out merely for saying 'hello Australia'. They also told them how many points they got, so it was very clear how unpopular you were.
The other weird part was the strangely positive feel to the show. BBAU is a family show, which sounds off-putting, but it meant they weren't constantly trying to make them kick off. They weren't even allowed to swear. There was slightly too much emphasis on the showmances, but there was enough bitching in the house to put our housemates to shame.
Where to start with the actual housemates? Luckily, some of the annoying housemates got kicked out first; the sanctimonious Sarah and the thicker-than-two-short-planks Ryan (supposedly good looking, but he looked cross-eyed to me).Layla was the thick-but-pretty Brit, who I was CERTAIN was going to win. Estelle 'I'm mad, me' was in turns annoying and sympathetic, especially when the others turned slagging her off into a sport. Michael was another one I was thought had a good shot of winning, but he ended up sidelined and flailing. Then there was Josh, the supposed 'hunk of the house' who I didn't find remotely attractive (are the standards different in Australia?). I didn't like his personality and I found his 'ladies man' schtick quite annoying. He seemed popular within the house until he hooked up with a new housemate, who sucked the life out of him. He spent two weeks snogging her in a corner, which was excruciatingly boring to watch. She was a complete wet fish. I can't even remember what the girl was called and I just watched the final. I've never known a housemate come in and suck more out of a house, except maybe Rex's girlfriend in our series. The other 'intruder' Sam, was also a boring bastard. Housemates who come in late are never welcome. Sam well outstayed his.
There was one more intruder, Delilah the dog. She was absolutely beautiful. Can you imagine them being given a dog in the UK show? They'd accidentally kill it within a week. Delilah stayed for the whole show, and was rehomed in the final week, at which point I cried as if a dear friend had died. She was sooooo lovely.
Then there was Stacey, who we were constantly told was hilarious, and was about as funny as slamming your fingers in a door. I was thrilled with her 'shock' eviction. Bradley was the 'Ian from BBUS' of the show, socially inept and stuttering. I wish he'd gone further. Ray and George were both evicted too early, in my opinion. Ray was a Tom Cruise-esque vet who threw a strop about chocolate milk on his first night and had a hilarious arrogance. George was a nice-but-dim millionaire who said the word 'AY' at the end of every sentence. I almost switched off for all the 'ay's in the first two weeks. Then I got used to it. Angie was from the 'Gold Coast' which the others seemed to insinuate made her a bit of a chav. Zoe was the 'country girl' who the others all said was beautiful in their leaving speeches, because she wasn't. She threw her gameplan out the window by becoming Glen Close in the last two weeks.
About halfway through the show, Josh was called to the Diary Room to be told his brother had died. I thought the way the show handled this was absolutely brilliant. Obviously Josh wanted to leave to be with his family, so they switched off the cameras and let the others say goodbye to him. They showed a little bit of him waving goodbye (which he consented to) but it was very respectful. Can you IMAGINE them turning the cameras off in our show? I mean, seriously? They would milk it for all it was worth. They did milk it a few days later when they brought Josh back and interviewed him and generally fawned over him, but you couldn't really resent them (or him) for it. It was interesting to see how the housemates dealt with that, too.
The weird part with the bitching was, I didn't really take sides. I could kind of see everyone's point. Estelle was annoying at times. Sam was dull. Zoe went mental and started stalking Michael and blew her chances of winning. Ben went on too much and was moody. Michael was flaky. They all bed-hopped. It just seemed like a different sort of culture to ours, more free and easy. Layla had two boyfriends in the house and no one called her a slut. There felt like there was more of a dating culture, more fluidity between friends and romances and allegiances changed often. I think the showmance with Estelle and Michael at the end hurt his chances, and was just cabin fever on his part.
The final was a joy to watch. They are generally just more respectful of their housemates than we are and it was all geared towards a feel-good experience. Can you imagine the UK housemates doing a song and dance routine and singing along to Gangnam Style? Can you see Conor and Deana doing the conga? Me either. They'd be too busy giving each other daggers to be singing 'protein shake ala Luke S'.
The final three were self-styled 'gangsta' Estelle, who I'd flip-flopped over liking and not liking, and ended up in the 'not like' camp. She WAS desperate to win and her constantly going on about being 'weird' turned out to be a bit of a 'drainer'. I'm glad she went a long way though, because it drove the others mad. Layla, stupid, lovely Layla had chosen the most unflattering eviction outfit since Josie Gibson; she looked like a giant pink emu. Fair play to Layla and her woman's body, but it's that age old Big Brother problem that you go in and put on two stone (remember Jade busting out of that sugar pink dress?). Was Layla a princess (ie. a Prima Donna?) A bit. But I'm glad she came second. When Zoe moaned that Layla is just one of those girls who gets things, it's because Layla went out and got them, whilst Zoe sat there moaning.
And finally there was Ben. I'd wanted Ben to win for about six weeks now. Gay, bitchy, hilariously funny; he's everything you want in a Big Brother contestant. I don't think you could have been as big a shitstirrer as he was and won it over here. Some of the things he said were genuinely poisonous, but he always said it in such a funny way, and it was normally what I was thinking. I loved it when Estelle went out third and he threw this stupid toy horse she'd been hoarding since a task over the wall after her. Ben got away with murder. He was sanctimonious at times and he definitely didn't practice what he preached. But I loved him for it. I loved his flaws and his one liners, and his need to be loved. He was vulnerable. I also thought he was really cute, especially in his Jurassic Park t-shirt.
It was wonderful to see his face when he won, and Layla was a really gracious runner up. I liked the fact they just showed him wandering dazed around the garden for ages; I always miss that bit of live feed where you see the winner freaking out on their own. I liked the fact he couldn't stop talking to Sonia. They sent his mum into the garden and he stood there gibbering, clutching the suitcase full of cash and went 'I need a Valium.' I could be friends with Benjamin. I even ended up liking the dopey host, and the So Good KFC Feel Good Moments, lol.
The best part was when Benjamin's boyfriend came on stage and Benjamin proposed to him and said 'I was going to do this even if I was chucked out first.' It was really like a fairytale, like when Danielle and Evil Dick made it to the final two; like I never thought Ben could win it. I always thought he'd come third. I'm so glad he had that moment - just when those pieces come together it's so rare but so nice.
So that's it. And I've realised what it is that Big Brother Australia has that our show doesn't, and it's charm. That's the ingedient we're missing, and it's not something that can be manufactured, and it's not something that the producers of our show even want. They want war. But that charm can be really powerful. That heartwarming feeling, and camaraderie, and positivity.
The Australian producers understand their own show. They understand the fanbase, whereas here we're completely disregarded. They have a long old season, too, 90 days! At the end of the show there was a good ten-minute trip down memory lane. It wasn't just 'thanks for your money, fuck off and see you next time.' When Benjamin won, there wasn't a boo in sight.
Congrats Benjamin, you deserve it. Even six months later. Next stop: Canada.
I couldn't get into the show AT ALL at first, and nearly gave up a few times. My boyfriend gave up after two episodes. The accents drove me mad. The host was annoying. Everyone seemed about ten years behind the UK. The 'secrets' secret task went on way too long and the protracted entering of housemates got on my nerves. In fact, I think it was just how cool the house looked that kept me interested for a week. I wanted that house to be the BBUK house. I also liked the wildlife - the weird birds in the garden.
But then something happened. Nothing in particular, I just wanted to watch the next episode, and the next. I didn't even particularly like ANYONE for at least a month. They were all so inoffensive they blended into one, and I felt like they had nothing interesting to say. But I'm so glad I stuck with it.
And what kept me with it was the production. Yes, the production! This show is lovingly made. The tasks were imaginative. The nominations were creative. They fiddled with them, in the form of a 'nominations superpower' and you still didn't object, because they did it in a smart way. The had the 'naughty corner' where you got sent for not wearing your microphone and they'd make you do ironing for a few hours. Big Brother didn't take no shit. I liked his style.
Some of the tasks were absolutely brilliant and they should definitely steal them for our show. The David Attenborough task (WAS it David Attenborough? Sure sounded like him) where the housemates had to dress up as different animals and the voiceover said things like 'Angie is a monkey who likes to smear honey on her face. And through her hair. And then she sits and waits.' and 'Josh has cooked a delicious meal, but George the naughty monkey comes along and steals it' the housemate had to do whatever he said. It was hilarious! The 'unwelcome guests' task was also imspired, where housemates had to ignore people coming into the house, including the narrator of the show who sat on the bed and narrated what happened around him. I'd like to see Marcus Bentley do that. They also had to ignore their own parents and friends. Obviously it breaks the 'no contact with the outside world' rule but that drum broke long ago, didn't it, Rylan?
There was also an amazing 'Tree of Temptation' character (he even spoke like him on a cockney accent) in Surly the puffa fish who set the housemates secret tasks and got insanely jealous of the pet dog (more on her later). He was really funny. What happened to Surly after the show!? The host made a joke about battering him!
The nominations were inspired; housemates stood in a glass nominations booth with the other housemates sitting directly behind them, and had five points to nominate, and they could give one housemate 4 and another 5, or 3 and 2, and so on. It added a great Eurovision feel to the show. Also, Big Brother was really sarky to them when they were nominating, strict on their reasons for nominating, and threatened to throw one housemate out merely for saying 'hello Australia'. They also told them how many points they got, so it was very clear how unpopular you were.
The other weird part was the strangely positive feel to the show. BBAU is a family show, which sounds off-putting, but it meant they weren't constantly trying to make them kick off. They weren't even allowed to swear. There was slightly too much emphasis on the showmances, but there was enough bitching in the house to put our housemates to shame.
Where to start with the actual housemates? Luckily, some of the annoying housemates got kicked out first; the sanctimonious Sarah and the thicker-than-two-short-planks Ryan (supposedly good looking, but he looked cross-eyed to me).Layla was the thick-but-pretty Brit, who I was CERTAIN was going to win. Estelle 'I'm mad, me' was in turns annoying and sympathetic, especially when the others turned slagging her off into a sport. Michael was another one I was thought had a good shot of winning, but he ended up sidelined and flailing. Then there was Josh, the supposed 'hunk of the house' who I didn't find remotely attractive (are the standards different in Australia?). I didn't like his personality and I found his 'ladies man' schtick quite annoying. He seemed popular within the house until he hooked up with a new housemate, who sucked the life out of him. He spent two weeks snogging her in a corner, which was excruciatingly boring to watch. She was a complete wet fish. I can't even remember what the girl was called and I just watched the final. I've never known a housemate come in and suck more out of a house, except maybe Rex's girlfriend in our series. The other 'intruder' Sam, was also a boring bastard. Housemates who come in late are never welcome. Sam well outstayed his.
There was one more intruder, Delilah the dog. She was absolutely beautiful. Can you imagine them being given a dog in the UK show? They'd accidentally kill it within a week. Delilah stayed for the whole show, and was rehomed in the final week, at which point I cried as if a dear friend had died. She was sooooo lovely.
Then there was Stacey, who we were constantly told was hilarious, and was about as funny as slamming your fingers in a door. I was thrilled with her 'shock' eviction. Bradley was the 'Ian from BBUS' of the show, socially inept and stuttering. I wish he'd gone further. Ray and George were both evicted too early, in my opinion. Ray was a Tom Cruise-esque vet who threw a strop about chocolate milk on his first night and had a hilarious arrogance. George was a nice-but-dim millionaire who said the word 'AY' at the end of every sentence. I almost switched off for all the 'ay's in the first two weeks. Then I got used to it. Angie was from the 'Gold Coast' which the others seemed to insinuate made her a bit of a chav. Zoe was the 'country girl' who the others all said was beautiful in their leaving speeches, because she wasn't. She threw her gameplan out the window by becoming Glen Close in the last two weeks.
About halfway through the show, Josh was called to the Diary Room to be told his brother had died. I thought the way the show handled this was absolutely brilliant. Obviously Josh wanted to leave to be with his family, so they switched off the cameras and let the others say goodbye to him. They showed a little bit of him waving goodbye (which he consented to) but it was very respectful. Can you IMAGINE them turning the cameras off in our show? I mean, seriously? They would milk it for all it was worth. They did milk it a few days later when they brought Josh back and interviewed him and generally fawned over him, but you couldn't really resent them (or him) for it. It was interesting to see how the housemates dealt with that, too.
The weird part with the bitching was, I didn't really take sides. I could kind of see everyone's point. Estelle was annoying at times. Sam was dull. Zoe went mental and started stalking Michael and blew her chances of winning. Ben went on too much and was moody. Michael was flaky. They all bed-hopped. It just seemed like a different sort of culture to ours, more free and easy. Layla had two boyfriends in the house and no one called her a slut. There felt like there was more of a dating culture, more fluidity between friends and romances and allegiances changed often. I think the showmance with Estelle and Michael at the end hurt his chances, and was just cabin fever on his part.
The final was a joy to watch. They are generally just more respectful of their housemates than we are and it was all geared towards a feel-good experience. Can you imagine the UK housemates doing a song and dance routine and singing along to Gangnam Style? Can you see Conor and Deana doing the conga? Me either. They'd be too busy giving each other daggers to be singing 'protein shake ala Luke S'.
The final three were self-styled 'gangsta' Estelle, who I'd flip-flopped over liking and not liking, and ended up in the 'not like' camp. She WAS desperate to win and her constantly going on about being 'weird' turned out to be a bit of a 'drainer'. I'm glad she went a long way though, because it drove the others mad. Layla, stupid, lovely Layla had chosen the most unflattering eviction outfit since Josie Gibson; she looked like a giant pink emu. Fair play to Layla and her woman's body, but it's that age old Big Brother problem that you go in and put on two stone (remember Jade busting out of that sugar pink dress?). Was Layla a princess (ie. a Prima Donna?) A bit. But I'm glad she came second. When Zoe moaned that Layla is just one of those girls who gets things, it's because Layla went out and got them, whilst Zoe sat there moaning.
And finally there was Ben. I'd wanted Ben to win for about six weeks now. Gay, bitchy, hilariously funny; he's everything you want in a Big Brother contestant. I don't think you could have been as big a shitstirrer as he was and won it over here. Some of the things he said were genuinely poisonous, but he always said it in such a funny way, and it was normally what I was thinking. I loved it when Estelle went out third and he threw this stupid toy horse she'd been hoarding since a task over the wall after her. Ben got away with murder. He was sanctimonious at times and he definitely didn't practice what he preached. But I loved him for it. I loved his flaws and his one liners, and his need to be loved. He was vulnerable. I also thought he was really cute, especially in his Jurassic Park t-shirt.
It was wonderful to see his face when he won, and Layla was a really gracious runner up. I liked the fact they just showed him wandering dazed around the garden for ages; I always miss that bit of live feed where you see the winner freaking out on their own. I liked the fact he couldn't stop talking to Sonia. They sent his mum into the garden and he stood there gibbering, clutching the suitcase full of cash and went 'I need a Valium.' I could be friends with Benjamin. I even ended up liking the dopey host, and the So Good KFC Feel Good Moments, lol.
The best part was when Benjamin's boyfriend came on stage and Benjamin proposed to him and said 'I was going to do this even if I was chucked out first.' It was really like a fairytale, like when Danielle and Evil Dick made it to the final two; like I never thought Ben could win it. I always thought he'd come third. I'm so glad he had that moment - just when those pieces come together it's so rare but so nice.
So that's it. And I've realised what it is that Big Brother Australia has that our show doesn't, and it's charm. That's the ingedient we're missing, and it's not something that can be manufactured, and it's not something that the producers of our show even want. They want war. But that charm can be really powerful. That heartwarming feeling, and camaraderie, and positivity.
The Australian producers understand their own show. They understand the fanbase, whereas here we're completely disregarded. They have a long old season, too, 90 days! At the end of the show there was a good ten-minute trip down memory lane. It wasn't just 'thanks for your money, fuck off and see you next time.' When Benjamin won, there wasn't a boo in sight.
Congrats Benjamin, you deserve it. Even six months later. Next stop: Canada.
Friday, 25 January 2013
Celebrity Big Brother 2013: Final - headache!
I like the sign saying 'Anyone but Speidi.' I don't like the series recap at the beginning, it should be at the end. Is it for people who haven't watched the whole series but want to watch the final? Can't see it somehow.
Here's all the ex-housemates we've grown to love. Oh. God, what a drabble. I only like Lacey.
Urgh, I hate the last minute pleas! I hope Toadie's out first. Spencer's eviction outfit seems to be a coat. Brian is wearing a green velvet jacket. Leprechaun times! I don't like Claire's ringlets, she looks like an overgrown child. Spencer should do the talking, not Heidi, as we learnt on the live feed last night, more of which later.
Here's the order I want them out: Ryan, Claire, Razor, Spontag, Rylan. Toadie's got some strategy there using his speech to say 'vote for Rylan'. That's some toadying right to the end!
There is SO MUCH Rylan backlash right now! But it don't matter, he still got this baby in the bag and I'll be £90 richer tonight.
Spencer: 'acquaintances.' What a grinch. I normally hate these last suppers, but this one was fantabulous. Here's what I learnt from the live feed last night: Spontag are lushes. And Spencer either pulled out the biggest strategy move in the whole of Big Brother, or actually cracked. Either way, it was absolutely AMAZING.
Razor said the 'friends not acquaintances' line as a comeback to Spencer; that adds a bit more context. He wasn't being nice, he was sniping. I loved it when they took an ad break when Toadfish did his speech on the live feed last night. Perfect timing for once.
Interesting to see how they'll cut Spencer's speech. Spencer's 'true heart' does not exist. The word 'cast' in Big Brother is just WRONG. Spencer: 'it's been very difficult for me to be awful.' LIES! OMG how could they cut out the kryptonite line? That was a bad edit of that speech because that was a truly revelatory moment. I love Razor and Rylan bitching after. It WAS a brilliant bit of acting. It even had me fooled for five seconds. But that edit was no reflection of it whatsoever. Big Brother DO want Rylan to win.
RYAN out now, please. Heidi should get someone to straighten that back bit of her hair.
OMG Razor in 5th! How did more people vote for Toadfish than him? I like the sign that says 'Milton Keynes' on tour. MK Ultra!
LOL look at Razor's girlfriend! She looks like a natural beauty. I wanted Razor to come third. Security! Security! Razor on Spontag: 'to be fair they're a bunch of fucking idiots.' I thought they were going to be BFFs for life?
They cut Razor's balls off after the puffa fish incident. We could have probably got more out of him. I wonder how Jim Davidson would have dealt with Speidi? We'll never know! At least we don't have to look at Razor's ballbags anymore. That lovely girlfriend can instead. Sorry, 'beautiful fiancee.'
OMG how did TOADFISH beat Claire? Neighbours must have more viewers than we thought. Or maybe his reverse psychology speech paid off. Toadfish looks stunned. Rylan's sob face, lol. Even Speidi broke out the chilly hugs where they stand a mile away from you and scrub themselves with antibacterial gel afterwards.
We're pontificating that Spencer always wears long sleeves because he's a self-harmer.
Oh, I get what's happening, people are voting for Ryan by accident when trying to vote for Rylan. It's the only explanation. I hope he doesn't win it on that basis.
I like Claire's red lipstick. Claire; you don't have a personality or a talent.
Is there any point Spontag having children... Claire really don't know. God, not the letters task again. I still don't get the fuss about the clapping. And I still want to know what was in Spontag's letter. Claire, shoulda woulda coulda. Whatever. You did NOTHING.
Even Claire don't want to commit to a duet with Rylan. Probably because he sings better than her.
Claire's getting the 'wub wubs' in her highlights. She don't deserve those.
Did Claire do better than H? I think she did. Wasn't he like sixth or something?
Have you ever seen three finalists sit so far apart? I've never seen such a lack a solidarity between the finalists. Shame, really.
My boyfriend said if Spiedi win it will be like when Rage Against the Machine beat Joe McElderry to number one, haha. True dat.
Rylan must be shitting himself that he's going to lose to those two. So am I, I really need that money. I WOULD like to see Rylan's face if Spontag won. And to hear all the booing.
Ryan's interview is going to be the zzzz. Brian's got his brolly up!
Look how far apart Rylan and Speidi are sitting! It's like my old counselling sessions where she sat so far apart from me I stopped going because it freaked me out. Rylan looks heartbroken, bless him! He wanted to be in the final two with Claire from Steps. Heidi, let Spencer speak, you idiot, he's the brains, you're the... er, something.
I don't believe Ryan really came third. It's C5 skullduggery. FIX, lol. Toadie's backing Rylan! He really hates Speidi, doesn't he?
What's this billionaire friends thing? Are Spontag's billionaire friends based in the UK? I thought they didn't have any friends? This is like Natalie Cassidy thinking her fans forgot to vote.
Toadie: RESPECT THE VOWS! Changed his tune, didn't he. PS: stop exercising, you're freaking Claire out. Can't believe they didn't show him saying 'respect the vows' in his highlights. That was hilarious.
HE DID IT! Rylan needs a pillow to cry into. He needs a Scherzinger to wipe his face on. Thank God. Good beat evil. My boyfriend put his finger on it when he said they even ruined his final moment because he had no one to cling to.
Drop Speidi out! Yay! That picture of them is creepy. I hope Speidi lets Spencer speak during this interview. How is Brian going to deal with this pair?! What was the music they played when they left? Spencer on the chants: 'It's not loud enough.' LOL to the sign saying 'run for The Hills.'
Heidi didn't answer that question as to whether they were playing the game. 'Two of the most disgusting housemates ever.' Spencer on being called 'the gruesome twosome.' 'The author of the headlines are brilliant...' haha.
Are the ex-housemates rabble-rousing! Fencesitter unite! About time. Heidi's clapping was taken out of context, ha.
Haha, to Spencer saying 'we knew it was a secret mission the second they said we won a viewer's vote.' Hehe! He's always clicking on the polls. Love it. Spencer unrepentant: 'you try living with them.'
Why can't we see Rylan up close in the background? That's one of my favourite things when the runner up is on. Look at all the other housemates gurning! Fuck you, you provided ZERO entertainment.
Didn't Michael Madsen come second?
WUB WUB! 'Shut up, Toadman!' Show him CRYING at the end! Show them jerking off! Can't believe they didn't show the JERK OFF in the highlights. Worried about the lawyers, methinks.
Aw, nice to see Rylan win in his wispy top and his leather trahsis. I never doubted him. Why aren't they playing Gangnam Style (legal issues).
Dowling, watch your back. Rylan could steal your camp crown! I love Rylan all emoshe. And Brian kissing him on the lips, how cute.
Rylan's paid me back the money I spent on him on X Factor AND Big Brother - yay.
Brian in the house memories! I don't remember Heidi and Spencer saying they were delighted Rylan had won. I don't see Heidi and Spencer standing in the rain with the other housemates. They're probably consulting with their lawyers.
Heidi: 'X Factor reject.' Haha, I never caught her saying that before.
Spencer and Heidi are standing out in the rain! With their umbrellas! I like the way 'made for each other' is both an insult and a compliment.
I LOVED one word to describe Heidi and Spencer: 'headache.' That's Rylan at his best.
LOL to 'Claire Richards: Slave to Food' and 'I get to meet H as well.' Don't count on it.
Things I love about Rylan: how he says 'row', 'house'. He also looked embarrassed about what he said about Heidi and cock. Oh stop moaning about getting stick, Rylan, you got loads of support!
It would have been better if Rylan had got the call from Barlow or Scherzinger! Rylan's mum is 'PRAAD of him'. And do you know what, so am I.
(PS: where's the fireworks?! It's all gone a bit Crystal Maze with the golden tickets.)
We're gonna do a podcast now. And I'm VERY drunk. Thanks for reading - have a good night.
Here's all the ex-housemates we've grown to love. Oh. God, what a drabble. I only like Lacey.
Urgh, I hate the last minute pleas! I hope Toadie's out first. Spencer's eviction outfit seems to be a coat. Brian is wearing a green velvet jacket. Leprechaun times! I don't like Claire's ringlets, she looks like an overgrown child. Spencer should do the talking, not Heidi, as we learnt on the live feed last night, more of which later.
Here's the order I want them out: Ryan, Claire, Razor, Spontag, Rylan. Toadie's got some strategy there using his speech to say 'vote for Rylan'. That's some toadying right to the end!
There is SO MUCH Rylan backlash right now! But it don't matter, he still got this baby in the bag and I'll be £90 richer tonight.
Spencer: 'acquaintances.' What a grinch. I normally hate these last suppers, but this one was fantabulous. Here's what I learnt from the live feed last night: Spontag are lushes. And Spencer either pulled out the biggest strategy move in the whole of Big Brother, or actually cracked. Either way, it was absolutely AMAZING.
Razor said the 'friends not acquaintances' line as a comeback to Spencer; that adds a bit more context. He wasn't being nice, he was sniping. I loved it when they took an ad break when Toadfish did his speech on the live feed last night. Perfect timing for once.
Interesting to see how they'll cut Spencer's speech. Spencer's 'true heart' does not exist. The word 'cast' in Big Brother is just WRONG. Spencer: 'it's been very difficult for me to be awful.' LIES! OMG how could they cut out the kryptonite line? That was a bad edit of that speech because that was a truly revelatory moment. I love Razor and Rylan bitching after. It WAS a brilliant bit of acting. It even had me fooled for five seconds. But that edit was no reflection of it whatsoever. Big Brother DO want Rylan to win.
RYAN out now, please. Heidi should get someone to straighten that back bit of her hair.
OMG Razor in 5th! How did more people vote for Toadfish than him? I like the sign that says 'Milton Keynes' on tour. MK Ultra!
LOL look at Razor's girlfriend! She looks like a natural beauty. I wanted Razor to come third. Security! Security! Razor on Spontag: 'to be fair they're a bunch of fucking idiots.' I thought they were going to be BFFs for life?
They cut Razor's balls off after the puffa fish incident. We could have probably got more out of him. I wonder how Jim Davidson would have dealt with Speidi? We'll never know! At least we don't have to look at Razor's ballbags anymore. That lovely girlfriend can instead. Sorry, 'beautiful fiancee.'
OMG how did TOADFISH beat Claire? Neighbours must have more viewers than we thought. Or maybe his reverse psychology speech paid off. Toadfish looks stunned. Rylan's sob face, lol. Even Speidi broke out the chilly hugs where they stand a mile away from you and scrub themselves with antibacterial gel afterwards.
We're pontificating that Spencer always wears long sleeves because he's a self-harmer.
Oh, I get what's happening, people are voting for Ryan by accident when trying to vote for Rylan. It's the only explanation. I hope he doesn't win it on that basis.
I like Claire's red lipstick. Claire; you don't have a personality or a talent.
Is there any point Spontag having children... Claire really don't know. God, not the letters task again. I still don't get the fuss about the clapping. And I still want to know what was in Spontag's letter. Claire, shoulda woulda coulda. Whatever. You did NOTHING.
Even Claire don't want to commit to a duet with Rylan. Probably because he sings better than her.
Claire's getting the 'wub wubs' in her highlights. She don't deserve those.
Did Claire do better than H? I think she did. Wasn't he like sixth or something?
Have you ever seen three finalists sit so far apart? I've never seen such a lack a solidarity between the finalists. Shame, really.
My boyfriend said if Spiedi win it will be like when Rage Against the Machine beat Joe McElderry to number one, haha. True dat.
Rylan must be shitting himself that he's going to lose to those two. So am I, I really need that money. I WOULD like to see Rylan's face if Spontag won. And to hear all the booing.
Ryan's interview is going to be the zzzz. Brian's got his brolly up!
Look how far apart Rylan and Speidi are sitting! It's like my old counselling sessions where she sat so far apart from me I stopped going because it freaked me out. Rylan looks heartbroken, bless him! He wanted to be in the final two with Claire from Steps. Heidi, let Spencer speak, you idiot, he's the brains, you're the... er, something.
I don't believe Ryan really came third. It's C5 skullduggery. FIX, lol. Toadie's backing Rylan! He really hates Speidi, doesn't he?
What's this billionaire friends thing? Are Spontag's billionaire friends based in the UK? I thought they didn't have any friends? This is like Natalie Cassidy thinking her fans forgot to vote.
Toadie: RESPECT THE VOWS! Changed his tune, didn't he. PS: stop exercising, you're freaking Claire out. Can't believe they didn't show him saying 'respect the vows' in his highlights. That was hilarious.
HE DID IT! Rylan needs a pillow to cry into. He needs a Scherzinger to wipe his face on. Thank God. Good beat evil. My boyfriend put his finger on it when he said they even ruined his final moment because he had no one to cling to.
Drop Speidi out! Yay! That picture of them is creepy. I hope Speidi lets Spencer speak during this interview. How is Brian going to deal with this pair?! What was the music they played when they left? Spencer on the chants: 'It's not loud enough.' LOL to the sign saying 'run for The Hills.'
Heidi didn't answer that question as to whether they were playing the game. 'Two of the most disgusting housemates ever.' Spencer on being called 'the gruesome twosome.' 'The author of the headlines are brilliant...' haha.
Are the ex-housemates rabble-rousing! Fencesitter unite! About time. Heidi's clapping was taken out of context, ha.
Haha, to Spencer saying 'we knew it was a secret mission the second they said we won a viewer's vote.' Hehe! He's always clicking on the polls. Love it. Spencer unrepentant: 'you try living with them.'
Why can't we see Rylan up close in the background? That's one of my favourite things when the runner up is on. Look at all the other housemates gurning! Fuck you, you provided ZERO entertainment.
Didn't Michael Madsen come second?
WUB WUB! 'Shut up, Toadman!' Show him CRYING at the end! Show them jerking off! Can't believe they didn't show the JERK OFF in the highlights. Worried about the lawyers, methinks.
Aw, nice to see Rylan win in his wispy top and his leather trahsis. I never doubted him. Why aren't they playing Gangnam Style (legal issues).
Dowling, watch your back. Rylan could steal your camp crown! I love Rylan all emoshe. And Brian kissing him on the lips, how cute.
Rylan's paid me back the money I spent on him on X Factor AND Big Brother - yay.
Brian in the house memories! I don't remember Heidi and Spencer saying they were delighted Rylan had won. I don't see Heidi and Spencer standing in the rain with the other housemates. They're probably consulting with their lawyers.
Heidi: 'X Factor reject.' Haha, I never caught her saying that before.
Spencer and Heidi are standing out in the rain! With their umbrellas! I like the way 'made for each other' is both an insult and a compliment.
I LOVED one word to describe Heidi and Spencer: 'headache.' That's Rylan at his best.
LOL to 'Claire Richards: Slave to Food' and 'I get to meet H as well.' Don't count on it.
Things I love about Rylan: how he says 'row', 'house'. He also looked embarrassed about what he said about Heidi and cock. Oh stop moaning about getting stick, Rylan, you got loads of support!
It would have been better if Rylan had got the call from Barlow or Scherzinger! Rylan's mum is 'PRAAD of him'. And do you know what, so am I.
(PS: where's the fireworks?! It's all gone a bit Crystal Maze with the golden tickets.)
We're gonna do a podcast now. And I'm VERY drunk. Thanks for reading - have a good night.
Thursday, 24 January 2013
Celebrity Big Brother 2013: Pebble-dashed
So in the interests of 'research' I decided to do a quick Hills binge before I have to cancel my Netflix this week. I skipped most of the stuff with Lauren; I don't like her at all, and I can't STAND that Whitney and her weird owl face. I don't like scripted reality shows full stop, if I want to watch bad acting, I'll watch Doctors. Basically, I was only interested in what the deal was with Heidi and Spencer, and now I'm up to season 3, episode 3, it has become abundantly clear. She was totally and utterly brainwashed by him. He cut her off from her friends in classic style, making her think it was her decision, forcing her to move in with him, and then proposing within a year. All massive red flags. She looked sad from day one. And you may say their 'relationship' is more 'equal' now - and maybe it is - but this Heidi is a product of what he did to her, fabricated reality or not. It was sad to watch someone being abused like that. And I'm sure it gets a million times worse. But there you go. I solved that mystery so you didn't have to. You can thank me later.
It's funny looking at how they look physically now after watching all that; I must admit, there was a distinct lack of teacher fleeces on The Hills and Spencer was dressed quite smart. Maybe he gave up on fashion when he got into the New World Order. Or he just got his Stepford wife so he didn't have to bother anymore.
I liked Rylan reliving the highlights of his year; you do never know what's round the corner, and sometimes it's something awful, not just appearances on Daybreak.
We spotted him pop up on Gordon Ramsay this year. He over-egged it with 'if someone was to make a film of my life, what a watch.' You can't say things like that about yourself. Well, you can, but it sounds boastful and hurts your (and my) chances of winning.
Heidi's hair looks straggly and yellow. It's weird seeing them all tanned and young and now they're all deformed and rotten. How you behave does affect your looks - sometimes.
Oh God, Rylan, STFU. 'It's nice being in here with the celebs and not having to mix with the plebs.' (not a direct quote, but the gist) My heart bleeds!
Are Big Brother trying to stitch Rylan up tonight? How come they're suddenly showing him singing all the time? I want to hear Heidi's album! And I heard Spencer has a rap album about info wars. That's entertainment.
Jamie East is in the house! Oooh. Are THESE questions real? Is anything real? Jamie looks weird without his beard. I can see Rylan's ginger roots! Who teamed Rylan and Claire with Spontag?
Toadfish is such a martyr, I can't BEAR IT. Saying Claire's like a lumpy potato is a bit harsh. Even I wouldn't say that.
Spencer does look like an axe-murderer. Heidi looks none too impressed.
Razor is a dirty warthog. Except one with it's balls cut off. I think we could have seen more of that quiz and it could have been harsher.
Spencer to his wife: 'we need to get you on a celebrity stripper show.' WTF! She didn't even respond.
I hate it when people go 'it's me, it's me' when they're waiting for the eviction results. It never is the person who says that.
Ha to Razor laughing that Frankie got evicted before him. That was funny. It was cute when Frankie said, 'I'll see you at the races.' Frankie told great stories? We never heard any! Did you see him on BOTS last night, you couldn't shut the fucker up. Maybe his man was there to meet him.
Toadie doing what he does best; toadying up. 'Well done for getting to the final' to Spontag. I'd be like, get to fuck.
Razor, you patronising prick. Heidi's been called a stripper and thick tonight.
Rylan must realise that people are voting for Spontag for the entertainmentz. We don't have to trust them. We don't even have to like them.
Razor's happy he got some cheers. I like him better than I did before he was on this show, that's for sure, so he's achieved his objective with me, which I'm sure he'll be thrilled about.
Spencer: 'we're moving to England.' Er... do you have to?
Wasn't being on X Factor more fun than being tormented by Speidi, Rylan? And what's with these sexist adverts?
Rylan and Rylan are getting their letters from home now. Shame Razor can't read a letter. Did a small child write 'fucking hell'? Ryan's kid can tell the time? I couldn't tell the time until I was 9. I just pretended I could before that. Heidi was cracking over the letter a bit, even though it underhandedly slated her. Icy pops!
I love Rylan getting all emotional. Even Heidi's properly crying now. Spencer probably programmed her settings wrong this morning. She's cracked. Notice when she got emotional Spencer didn't even notice, and Claire went to comfort her. That was the real Heidi, wasn't it? The Heidi who'll never be a mother; unless Spencer falls off a cliff.
Rylan is pillaging the Big Brother house! I don't blame him, I would, too. Big Brother is mean making him give them back.
Heidi 'styles' Spencer? Must try harder. She should try Rylan style instead.
I have a bad feeling in my heart tonight, and I'm not sure if it's my Hills binge, or the fact I might lose £50, or that I'm watching this alone, or it's nearly over, but I really hate seeing all the nasty comments towards Rylan. People saying he's a bully, or he swears too much, or he's 'too camp' (and we know what that really means). Whatever you think of him, he's harmless. You might find him contrived, or fake. I don't think he is. I think he's just a nice guy. And I don't want those cunts to snatch it from him. Not for me. But for him. And for ENGLAND!!! For Queen and country, give it to our boy from Essex.
See you at the finish line.
It's funny looking at how they look physically now after watching all that; I must admit, there was a distinct lack of teacher fleeces on The Hills and Spencer was dressed quite smart. Maybe he gave up on fashion when he got into the New World Order. Or he just got his Stepford wife so he didn't have to bother anymore.
I liked Rylan reliving the highlights of his year; you do never know what's round the corner, and sometimes it's something awful, not just appearances on Daybreak.
We spotted him pop up on Gordon Ramsay this year. He over-egged it with 'if someone was to make a film of my life, what a watch.' You can't say things like that about yourself. Well, you can, but it sounds boastful and hurts your (and my) chances of winning.
Heidi's hair looks straggly and yellow. It's weird seeing them all tanned and young and now they're all deformed and rotten. How you behave does affect your looks - sometimes.
Oh God, Rylan, STFU. 'It's nice being in here with the celebs and not having to mix with the plebs.' (not a direct quote, but the gist) My heart bleeds!
Are Big Brother trying to stitch Rylan up tonight? How come they're suddenly showing him singing all the time? I want to hear Heidi's album! And I heard Spencer has a rap album about info wars. That's entertainment.
Jamie East is in the house! Oooh. Are THESE questions real? Is anything real? Jamie looks weird without his beard. I can see Rylan's ginger roots! Who teamed Rylan and Claire with Spontag?
Toadfish is such a martyr, I can't BEAR IT. Saying Claire's like a lumpy potato is a bit harsh. Even I wouldn't say that.
Spencer does look like an axe-murderer. Heidi looks none too impressed.
Razor is a dirty warthog. Except one with it's balls cut off. I think we could have seen more of that quiz and it could have been harsher.
Spencer to his wife: 'we need to get you on a celebrity stripper show.' WTF! She didn't even respond.
I hate it when people go 'it's me, it's me' when they're waiting for the eviction results. It never is the person who says that.
Ha to Razor laughing that Frankie got evicted before him. That was funny. It was cute when Frankie said, 'I'll see you at the races.' Frankie told great stories? We never heard any! Did you see him on BOTS last night, you couldn't shut the fucker up. Maybe his man was there to meet him.
Toadie doing what he does best; toadying up. 'Well done for getting to the final' to Spontag. I'd be like, get to fuck.
Razor, you patronising prick. Heidi's been called a stripper and thick tonight.
Rylan must realise that people are voting for Spontag for the entertainmentz. We don't have to trust them. We don't even have to like them.
Razor's happy he got some cheers. I like him better than I did before he was on this show, that's for sure, so he's achieved his objective with me, which I'm sure he'll be thrilled about.
Spencer: 'we're moving to England.' Er... do you have to?
Wasn't being on X Factor more fun than being tormented by Speidi, Rylan? And what's with these sexist adverts?
Rylan and Rylan are getting their letters from home now. Shame Razor can't read a letter. Did a small child write 'fucking hell'? Ryan's kid can tell the time? I couldn't tell the time until I was 9. I just pretended I could before that. Heidi was cracking over the letter a bit, even though it underhandedly slated her. Icy pops!
I love Rylan getting all emotional. Even Heidi's properly crying now. Spencer probably programmed her settings wrong this morning. She's cracked. Notice when she got emotional Spencer didn't even notice, and Claire went to comfort her. That was the real Heidi, wasn't it? The Heidi who'll never be a mother; unless Spencer falls off a cliff.
Rylan is pillaging the Big Brother house! I don't blame him, I would, too. Big Brother is mean making him give them back.
Heidi 'styles' Spencer? Must try harder. She should try Rylan style instead.
I have a bad feeling in my heart tonight, and I'm not sure if it's my Hills binge, or the fact I might lose £50, or that I'm watching this alone, or it's nearly over, but I really hate seeing all the nasty comments towards Rylan. People saying he's a bully, or he swears too much, or he's 'too camp' (and we know what that really means). Whatever you think of him, he's harmless. You might find him contrived, or fake. I don't think he is. I think he's just a nice guy. And I don't want those cunts to snatch it from him. Not for me. But for him. And for ENGLAND!!! For Queen and country, give it to our boy from Essex.
See you at the finish line.
Wednesday, 23 January 2013
Celebrity Big Brother 2013: Double eviction - deadwood cleared out
Double eviction! Get Speidi out chant from the mob. I just voted to save Rylan and Speidi. I just watched a bit of The Hills before Spencer even joined the show and Heidi was being an arsehole, so that's my research complete. At least she looked like a humanoid, though.
Ooh, the snow looks quite nice. Eastenders would pay the big bucks for that.
Toadie is being a grump about Rylan waking him up in the night. 'I know you're having a ball' means 'I'm not having a ball so STFU.' Spencer sarcastically: 'he's here for the experience.' Haha. Yeah, just like you are. They are ALL THERE for the cheque. I haven't liked Toadfish from day one, he's so sanctimonious. I don't feel sorry for him when he's crying. I don't feel sorry for him when he didn't get his letter. I don't think he's a big man for 'saying it to their face'. I just think he's a moaning old whingebag. I thought he'd be funny, laid back, chilled. He's just a dullard. So I guess that makes him a good actor, because from what I can remember, Toadfish was likeable.
Spencer is stirring the pot. He's got his grey teacher fleece on today. He's playing the game well. Toadie is going from group to group, carping. Haha, Tricia going 'Thanks, Spence.' What a mug! It's him who stopped you getting the letters in the first place. When Spencer's trying to play the nice guy, you know you're in trouble. Check your back for knives.
Ooh, Paula's back! I think Paula and Rylan will make a good team critiquing the others fashion. Spencer's not going to like someone commenting on Heidi's clothes, I saw him nearly punch someone for that on The Hills. Rylan said Spencer was dressed for 'a country walk with the dogs.' Ryan is NOT worse dressed than Spencer. I like Ryan's swallow t-shirt.
I like it on Big Brother US when they have to do a quick shopping spree by putting all the clothes on at once and they have to say how much they like all the different brands. They haven't done that for a while, actually.
Rylan's hair seems to have gone off the boil the past couple of days. I'm liking Tricia's hot pink heels. I like the fact they have to give Spontag champagne to make them participate in a task. Light pink isn't Tricia's colour, I'm afraid. Aw, was quite nice to give mad Paula her moment of glory. She probably did well to get out when she did - Spontag at full throttle would have probably sent her to the nearest crackhouse. Let's face it, we've all considered it.
First eviction! I have NO IDEA who is going. That's unusual. Frankie's always got sweaty armpits. Heidi's waving like the queen. Toadie's shocked to get boos. Ooh, Frankie's out! That's what you get for trying to blend into the furniture. You could have been a really great housemate. He looks thrilled to be leaving, to be honest. Aw, was cute when he jumped on Razor's back. I personally like Frankie better than everyone in that house bar Rylan and Spontag (in their own way).
I like Frankie's furry collar. Oh he's moaning about being bored in the house. Boo woo. How much did you get paid for it? Enough to go have a good evening or two, let's put it that way.
Frankie: 'I kept away from the friction.' No kidding.
Why are they showing Frankie Spontag's highlights? 'Dick-tator' still makes me laugh. Kind of a bad buzz showing Frankie those clips. I was glad Brian dug Frankie out for fencesitting a bit, but I feel a bit sorry for Frankie that he didn't get the cosy experience he was expecting. In another year he could probably have won it, he's a lot nicer than Paddy Doherty, Denise Welch or Ulrika.
Frankie's getting good music for his highlights; Mr. Brightside. Should have been Karma Chameleon. Now you see him, now you don't!
LOL, Frankie wants Razor out next so he can have a drink with him. That's pretty funny. I think he just wants Razor because he's useful for chopping up cocaine.
Is Heidi drunk? She loves Paula and Spencer 'infinitely'. Love isn't about sacrificing things for someone. 'I want to beam you right up into my something.' Goodness me!
Toadie's dancing: amaze. What the hell is this music! Heidi's doing her naughty dancing again.
Stop press, Spencer in the DR alone! Where's Heidi?! In the loo? Oh, hovering outside. Bragging about his sex life. Eww. I wish I was as much of a fun drunk as Heidi. She's frisky after almost a decade of teacher fleeces.
Jenny Powell doing the Health Lottery tonight. Did you know she's a stand up comedian now? That's not even a joke.
Ryan is pissed off he's getting boos. Haha. Hope he's out next. Oh, it's Tricia. Well, that's about a week overdue. Second favourite to win, my arse. She couldn't even win a 'spot the 20th most famous person to ever come out of Heartbeat' competition.
Is Brian saying he wanted her to be more like Denise? Does he mean stripping off? Why is Brian digging everyone out tonight? Bet he doesn't dare dig out Spontag. What's Spencer's eviction outfit going to be? What's the poshest brand of fleece you can buy?
Is Tricia so stupid that she thinks Heidi and Spencer aren't entertaining?
Brian said 'they actually have us gripped watching the show.' But it sounded like he said 'they actually have a script during the show.'
To be fair, Tricia did have a go at Spontag a couple of times, barely, but more than say, Frankie did. Brian: 'why didn't you have a go at them more?' Why didn't you put more interesting housemates in there? Oh god, 'we're mums' - put a sock in it.
I thought Brian was a bit snarky with Tricia. Mind you, if the best she had was her Cilla Black impression, then there's the door, see you later. How much do you think they paid her? I reckon about ten grand.
Two floaters out tonight; where will the ship sail to tomorrow? Whatever happens, you know Captain Rylan's got this in the bag. I fucking hope so anyway. Spontag for second place. The rest can go spin.
Ooh, the snow looks quite nice. Eastenders would pay the big bucks for that.
Toadie is being a grump about Rylan waking him up in the night. 'I know you're having a ball' means 'I'm not having a ball so STFU.' Spencer sarcastically: 'he's here for the experience.' Haha. Yeah, just like you are. They are ALL THERE for the cheque. I haven't liked Toadfish from day one, he's so sanctimonious. I don't feel sorry for him when he's crying. I don't feel sorry for him when he didn't get his letter. I don't think he's a big man for 'saying it to their face'. I just think he's a moaning old whingebag. I thought he'd be funny, laid back, chilled. He's just a dullard. So I guess that makes him a good actor, because from what I can remember, Toadfish was likeable.
Spencer is stirring the pot. He's got his grey teacher fleece on today. He's playing the game well. Toadie is going from group to group, carping. Haha, Tricia going 'Thanks, Spence.' What a mug! It's him who stopped you getting the letters in the first place. When Spencer's trying to play the nice guy, you know you're in trouble. Check your back for knives.
Ooh, Paula's back! I think Paula and Rylan will make a good team critiquing the others fashion. Spencer's not going to like someone commenting on Heidi's clothes, I saw him nearly punch someone for that on The Hills. Rylan said Spencer was dressed for 'a country walk with the dogs.' Ryan is NOT worse dressed than Spencer. I like Ryan's swallow t-shirt.
I like it on Big Brother US when they have to do a quick shopping spree by putting all the clothes on at once and they have to say how much they like all the different brands. They haven't done that for a while, actually.
Rylan's hair seems to have gone off the boil the past couple of days. I'm liking Tricia's hot pink heels. I like the fact they have to give Spontag champagne to make them participate in a task. Light pink isn't Tricia's colour, I'm afraid. Aw, was quite nice to give mad Paula her moment of glory. She probably did well to get out when she did - Spontag at full throttle would have probably sent her to the nearest crackhouse. Let's face it, we've all considered it.
First eviction! I have NO IDEA who is going. That's unusual. Frankie's always got sweaty armpits. Heidi's waving like the queen. Toadie's shocked to get boos. Ooh, Frankie's out! That's what you get for trying to blend into the furniture. You could have been a really great housemate. He looks thrilled to be leaving, to be honest. Aw, was cute when he jumped on Razor's back. I personally like Frankie better than everyone in that house bar Rylan and Spontag (in their own way).
I like Frankie's furry collar. Oh he's moaning about being bored in the house. Boo woo. How much did you get paid for it? Enough to go have a good evening or two, let's put it that way.
Frankie: 'I kept away from the friction.' No kidding.
Why are they showing Frankie Spontag's highlights? 'Dick-tator' still makes me laugh. Kind of a bad buzz showing Frankie those clips. I was glad Brian dug Frankie out for fencesitting a bit, but I feel a bit sorry for Frankie that he didn't get the cosy experience he was expecting. In another year he could probably have won it, he's a lot nicer than Paddy Doherty, Denise Welch or Ulrika.
Frankie's getting good music for his highlights; Mr. Brightside. Should have been Karma Chameleon. Now you see him, now you don't!
LOL, Frankie wants Razor out next so he can have a drink with him. That's pretty funny. I think he just wants Razor because he's useful for chopping up cocaine.
Is Heidi drunk? She loves Paula and Spencer 'infinitely'. Love isn't about sacrificing things for someone. 'I want to beam you right up into my something.' Goodness me!
Toadie's dancing: amaze. What the hell is this music! Heidi's doing her naughty dancing again.
Stop press, Spencer in the DR alone! Where's Heidi?! In the loo? Oh, hovering outside. Bragging about his sex life. Eww. I wish I was as much of a fun drunk as Heidi. She's frisky after almost a decade of teacher fleeces.
Jenny Powell doing the Health Lottery tonight. Did you know she's a stand up comedian now? That's not even a joke.
Ryan is pissed off he's getting boos. Haha. Hope he's out next. Oh, it's Tricia. Well, that's about a week overdue. Second favourite to win, my arse. She couldn't even win a 'spot the 20th most famous person to ever come out of Heartbeat' competition.
Is Brian saying he wanted her to be more like Denise? Does he mean stripping off? Why is Brian digging everyone out tonight? Bet he doesn't dare dig out Spontag. What's Spencer's eviction outfit going to be? What's the poshest brand of fleece you can buy?
Is Tricia so stupid that she thinks Heidi and Spencer aren't entertaining?
Brian said 'they actually have us gripped watching the show.' But it sounded like he said 'they actually have a script during the show.'
To be fair, Tricia did have a go at Spontag a couple of times, barely, but more than say, Frankie did. Brian: 'why didn't you have a go at them more?' Why didn't you put more interesting housemates in there? Oh god, 'we're mums' - put a sock in it.
I thought Brian was a bit snarky with Tricia. Mind you, if the best she had was her Cilla Black impression, then there's the door, see you later. How much do you think they paid her? I reckon about ten grand.
Two floaters out tonight; where will the ship sail to tomorrow? Whatever happens, you know Captain Rylan's got this in the bag. I fucking hope so anyway. Spontag for second place. The rest can go spin.
Tuesday, 22 January 2013
Celebrity Big Brother 2013: There's no boundaries to being an arsehole
They're having a laugh starting the show with a shot of Rylan screaming 'get me out of this 'ouse!' aren't they? Pisstakers.
Guess what, Toadie, you ARE at work right now, too. You're not sitting in the Big Brother house for fun, are you? You're they're for the cheque, just like them. Get down off your high horse, Frankie needs it back.
Spencer, if they all died in the house, I don't think you'd be invited to the funeral, never fear. Nice of you to put that idea out there, though. Tasteful. Spencer should have 'there are no boundaries to being an arsehole' chiselled into his gravestone.
I don't like that bad feeling Spencer and Heidi create around tasks. I feel sorry for the other housemates having to live in that bad atmosphere. They are ruining the others' experience. Stag and hen parties are against their beliefs. Hen parties are against my beliefs, too. I'd rather drink paint stripper. Spontag should be up on a warning for their insubordinate behaviour. They're coming across like a pair of old trouts.
I like the notion of a 'special gender stereotype busting obstacle course.'
LOL to Rylan: 'who you talking to?' Toadie: 'Your mum.' Rylan: ''Ow is she?'
Spontag are cutting off their nose to spite their face(s), because when they did take part in tasks, they enjoyed them (you know, apart from the sexist ones). They enjoyed that silly eating one, didn't they?
I would be good at a sweating task, I'm dead sweaty. I used to have to use that special deodorant for your hands when I had an exam at school or my pen would all smudge. TMI? Hey, some people like clammy women. I'm not AS clammy as that now, but you still wouldn't want to shake my hand on a hot day *subtly wipes palms on clothes*
Everyone should have clapped when Spencer and Heidi's bed were removed and seen how they liked it. At least Rylan and Toadie laughed, everyone else cleared the room as fast as if Razor had just taken all his clothes off.
Oh God, someone's touched Spencer's teacher fleeces and Heidi's bras. CONTAMINATION.
I do find it interesting how split people are on Rylan and Heidi and Spencer. Even I flip flop on Spontag, I loved it when they were flipping the bird in the basement but they've just been dour for two days and I'm tired of it. They need to change up their act.
Heidi: 'I wish we did the task.' Ner ner. Spencer likes sleeping on the floor better. 'Dumb and dumber... self saboteurs.' At least he's self-effacing for once. Followed by a good one liner from Rylan about not wanting to get stuck with 'Happy and Happier'.
Aw to Claire and Tricia giving Spontag more cushions for their nest. I'd smother the cunts in their sleep.
Razor is trying to be 'the comedy guy' at the moment. That slot is already taken. I wouldn't drink out of a straw shaped like a penis on principle.
Spencer needs a haircut, a shave and a lobotomy. How can she fancy him? It MUST be mind control.
Ha, I knew they'd get their letters from home anyway! What bullshit.
HA to Heidi going 'God bless you' when Tricia sneezed. When did she get some manners?
The women are getting their letters, the men are not. Solidarity times are over. Aw, Frankie cuddling Toadie was cute. Perhaps we'd care about them more if they'd been shown more.
Oh, Razor gets his letter because he joined the girls. Rylan's got fake tan tear streaks. Why is he dressed as a pilot?
Razor's crying, Toadie's crying, is Spencer crying? Of course fucking not, are you mad? Oh shut up, Razor with your 'grow men cry' disclaimer, aren't you meant to be a girl today?
I don't know what Toadie's so upset about, we all know what his letter from home would have said: 'G'day cobber, we're having a barbie, missing you, you great gala, love Sheila.' Why is he so desperate to hear from Paul Robinson anyway? Don't it make you feel good?
I think Spontag want a drink, don't you? I've never seen two people run to a fridge so fast.
Do you really believe Spontag thought they were going to be separated for days? 'The clap was misinterpreted.' I think it was, actually. Why does Tricia WANT to cuddle them? I'd rather cuddle a rattlesnake.
They have apologised, Toadie, Heidi said 'sorry for everything'. Can't you accept that? Hahahahaha! Frankie 'just drop it.' Oh Frankie, you're a disappointment of a man. Toadie is right to still have beef. Forever beef after the way that pair have behaved. OH, Toadie's got the arsehole cos the girls got their letter, NOT because he's sad about not getting his letter. I wouldn't have been upset that night, I don't think. I think they made their point the day before. He's being a bit grumpy now and it's not very endearing. Mind you, what's new?
Guess what, Toadie, you ARE at work right now, too. You're not sitting in the Big Brother house for fun, are you? You're they're for the cheque, just like them. Get down off your high horse, Frankie needs it back.
Spencer, if they all died in the house, I don't think you'd be invited to the funeral, never fear. Nice of you to put that idea out there, though. Tasteful. Spencer should have 'there are no boundaries to being an arsehole' chiselled into his gravestone.
I don't like that bad feeling Spencer and Heidi create around tasks. I feel sorry for the other housemates having to live in that bad atmosphere. They are ruining the others' experience. Stag and hen parties are against their beliefs. Hen parties are against my beliefs, too. I'd rather drink paint stripper. Spontag should be up on a warning for their insubordinate behaviour. They're coming across like a pair of old trouts.
I like the notion of a 'special gender stereotype busting obstacle course.'
LOL to Rylan: 'who you talking to?' Toadie: 'Your mum.' Rylan: ''Ow is she?'
Spontag are cutting off their nose to spite their face(s), because when they did take part in tasks, they enjoyed them (you know, apart from the sexist ones). They enjoyed that silly eating one, didn't they?
I would be good at a sweating task, I'm dead sweaty. I used to have to use that special deodorant for your hands when I had an exam at school or my pen would all smudge. TMI? Hey, some people like clammy women. I'm not AS clammy as that now, but you still wouldn't want to shake my hand on a hot day *subtly wipes palms on clothes*
Everyone should have clapped when Spencer and Heidi's bed were removed and seen how they liked it. At least Rylan and Toadie laughed, everyone else cleared the room as fast as if Razor had just taken all his clothes off.
Oh God, someone's touched Spencer's teacher fleeces and Heidi's bras. CONTAMINATION.
I do find it interesting how split people are on Rylan and Heidi and Spencer. Even I flip flop on Spontag, I loved it when they were flipping the bird in the basement but they've just been dour for two days and I'm tired of it. They need to change up their act.
Heidi: 'I wish we did the task.' Ner ner. Spencer likes sleeping on the floor better. 'Dumb and dumber... self saboteurs.' At least he's self-effacing for once. Followed by a good one liner from Rylan about not wanting to get stuck with 'Happy and Happier'.
Aw to Claire and Tricia giving Spontag more cushions for their nest. I'd smother the cunts in their sleep.
Razor is trying to be 'the comedy guy' at the moment. That slot is already taken. I wouldn't drink out of a straw shaped like a penis on principle.
Spencer needs a haircut, a shave and a lobotomy. How can she fancy him? It MUST be mind control.
Ha, I knew they'd get their letters from home anyway! What bullshit.
HA to Heidi going 'God bless you' when Tricia sneezed. When did she get some manners?
The women are getting their letters, the men are not. Solidarity times are over. Aw, Frankie cuddling Toadie was cute. Perhaps we'd care about them more if they'd been shown more.
Oh, Razor gets his letter because he joined the girls. Rylan's got fake tan tear streaks. Why is he dressed as a pilot?
Razor's crying, Toadie's crying, is Spencer crying? Of course fucking not, are you mad? Oh shut up, Razor with your 'grow men cry' disclaimer, aren't you meant to be a girl today?
I don't know what Toadie's so upset about, we all know what his letter from home would have said: 'G'day cobber, we're having a barbie, missing you, you great gala, love Sheila.' Why is he so desperate to hear from Paul Robinson anyway? Don't it make you feel good?
I think Spontag want a drink, don't you? I've never seen two people run to a fridge so fast.
Do you really believe Spontag thought they were going to be separated for days? 'The clap was misinterpreted.' I think it was, actually. Why does Tricia WANT to cuddle them? I'd rather cuddle a rattlesnake.
They have apologised, Toadie, Heidi said 'sorry for everything'. Can't you accept that? Hahahahaha! Frankie 'just drop it.' Oh Frankie, you're a disappointment of a man. Toadie is right to still have beef. Forever beef after the way that pair have behaved. OH, Toadie's got the arsehole cos the girls got their letter, NOT because he's sad about not getting his letter. I wouldn't have been upset that night, I don't think. I think they made their point the day before. He's being a bit grumpy now and it's not very endearing. Mind you, what's new?
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)