Thursday, 5 September 2013

Celebrity Big Brother 2013: I'm over it

Why weren't face to face nominations live? Something vaguely interesting happens and they can't be bothered to show it. Figures.
Abz is only a year older than me, I learnt from Heat magazine in the bath earlier *glimpse into my world*. He comes across like he's been through a world war, not a boyband going bust.
Charlotte, please spare me the image of Carol 'sucking her boyfriend's willy'. Some things should not be pictured.
Dustin looks like a man on the edge. When Bruce is comforting you, you're screwed. Poor Screech, he looks tired out. I don't blame him for being over it. I'm over it, too. Dustin's now the same way Abz was when he entered the house. Like a haunted mansion.
Charlotte's psychic act is mildly amusing, but I'm not interested. It's so scripted, especially given the fact they keep mentioning Carol. Do they think we were born yesterday?
Why are they starving the housemates, anyway? I don't really get it. Has the food budget been cut? Waitrose too dear? Shouldn't have fucked things up with Lidl by having Jedward wreck the joint, ha.
This challenge is sponsored by Maximuscle! How can they do a task when they're all starved? Boo woo. I don't care about tasks. But I do advocate more celebrities being put in paperbags. Eyeholes in a paper bag, greatest lay I've ever had, as Brian Molko once said.
Dustin is doing a John McCruick, but instead of silence, he's on hunger strike, and there's no Diet Coke at the end of his rainbow.
I don't really see how Carol putting up Courtney is a 'special power'. Courtney would be up anyway, plus she only got one nomination.
Lauren's boobs are hanging out now! Has she been taking lessons from Courtney?! Bruce wants to stay? WTF. I'd hate to see him if he wants to leave.
I kind of like the way Sophie was with Lauren in the end, there was sort of a bit of humanity between them.
I actually saw Sophie being nice to Dustin, too. She actually listened to him, unlike most people in there, so STFU Carol.
Where's the dick on Carol's face gone? I'm surprised they could afford to pay for a new picture. How come Dustin goes 'I'm so glad you're here, I missed you' to Carol? Gameplanning! This is a blog full of questions.
Carol doesn't look 'lovely', she's just combed her hair. Actually, I don't mind what she's wearing.
I hate Carol's stupid scripted nomination to Courtney. What a load of tosh.
Face to face noms. If I only I cared if one person in that house lived or died. What has Dustin been analysing? All I heard was him moaning about food.
Is Carol immune? Why is no one nominating her?
Why is Bruce nominating Dustin if 'he's a great friend'? Dustin is an easy out face to face.
What sort of reason is it to nominate Lauren that she keeps falling over?
Dustin, Louie isn't 'kind of an arsehole.' He's a MASSIVE arsehole.
Up are Courtney, Abz, Bruce, Dustin, Lauren, Louie and Vicky. I think Dustin could be vulnerable. I don't exactly think there's a hardcore of Screech fans who are going to save him. Do you?
Ah, I get it. Dustin was acting up to get nominated. Fair enough. Every other idiot has done it.
Lauren: 'I can wear flat shoes and I don't have to leave tissues everywhere.' Why don't you try it, then?
Abz is right; Courtney does get a lot of stick. She's not that bad. I hope both of them stay. There's still some Five fans left, right?
Carol shit-stirring about Courtney's husband. Blah. No one wants to see you 'all over' your bloke. Gross.
Oh, so now Dustin's saying he DID lose his cool today. Make your mind up. I thought Bruce was quite good with him, really. I change my mind on everyone in this house every five minutes.
That felt real when Abz and Vicky said they wanted Lauren to win.
It seems like Courtney is being stifled by her husband and she's had a taste of freedom now. That man shouldn't have married her at 16, it's ridiculous. She needs to develop as a human. Still, bit late now.

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