The Pick-Up Artist: Final

Oh my God, The Pick Up Artist was the best show ever. We watched the whole damn lot in one week. I watched the first in the new series of America's Next Top Model yesterday and The Pick Up Artist blew it out of the water for charm, positivity and good old male-bonding. I loved all the crying. I love seeing a man cry, especially over being awarded a gaudy medallion by a man named Mystery.
AND the best man won!
Ok so there is a something a little bit creepy about calling groups of women 'sets' and treating dating as a game but it is a game for some people. And there is something quite life-affirming and reassuring about the way it is done. It's quite clever the way Mystery even wraps the viewer round his long, skinny fingers. (eww)
So how does he do it? Mystery looks like a lanky geek who had a run in with a pilot and a leopard and an eyeliner, and a few chat up lines 'did you see that fight outside?' and 'you wiggle your nose when you smile' and he's in with all sorts of gorgeous women. Surely it's not that easy? But some of the tips and tricks are quite good, like saying you can only stay for five minutes to stop girls wishing you would fuck off, and including the girl's friend whom you're trying to chat up.
I LOVED all the geeks in The Pick Up Artist, but especially Kosmo (with a K) because he wasn't really a geek at all, he was a cute Latino in a furry hoodie. Brady was alright, but I didn't like his blonde hair. He did pull an 'exotic dancer' though, which was quite impressive. I hope he can get laid at last.
I guess the best thing about the show is it proves that you don't need to be drop dead gorgeous to pull, you just need to bullshit cleverly. No, you just need bags of confidence, and that can be faked. Hope for geeks everywhere. Just lay off the leopard print. Please.

The Pick-Up Artist: Your Old Life Dies Here

My boyfriend downloaded a really funny show tonight called The Pick-Up Artist, which i think is showing in America at the moment. It is basically America's Next Top Model but with geeky men in it. Which is no bad thing, when you think about it. The premise is these are a bunch of socially inept, awkward virgins and this guy comes in to train them to be lotharios. Fine: except for the guy himself is an absolute mingaloid! His name is 'Mystery' for starters: I'd have gone for 'Enigma' myself. He also has two henchmen: Matador, and J-Dog (I may have got that wrong). Mystery's fashion sense leaves a lot to be desired: he was wearing this ridiculous leapord print jacket, and alternating his headwear between goggles (what the fuck?) and a ridiculous black fluffy hat (I'd go as far as to say BONNET) which has to be seen to be believed (really: google him). I can genuinely say that no amount of charm (i.e. bullshit) would make me go within five miles of him or his greasy mates.
Weirdly, I found myself attracted to several of the geeks. There is something strangely sexy about awkwardness, shyness, even flab sometimes. And of course, geeks have brains. Intelligence is my number one thing for fancying someone, not fuzzy felt hats. It made me sad to hear of the geeks wanting to be James Bond: fuck that: they should just go out with fellow geek girls! All 'Mystery' (real name Eric) is going to teach them is how to be sleazy and say horrible one liners. Their 'prize' is the winner gets to go hang round with Mystery and his grubby hat for a year, picking up STDs. Lovely.
Rather cruelly, Mystery made all the geeks go to a bar and chat up women and they all got dissed. have they never HEARD of the internet? Still: liking this. Looking forward to the makeovers.