Documentary: Montage of Heck

I went to see Montage of Heck today, the documentary about Kurt Cobain. It's impossible to write about in a vacuum, because the story, the time period etc had such a profound impact on everyone of that era who was a Nirvana fan or a teenager when Kurt died. I'm sure everyone has their own story about that time, and the impact of his death culturally and emotionally. Like Patty's documentary Hit So Hard, this was very painful to watch at times and me and my friend who went to see it both came out of the cinema needing a Valium and a nice sit down.
Now here's a confession; I don't like Kurt Cobain very much. I loved him so much when I was a teenager that when he killed himself, I took it as a personal insult. I felt so deeply betrayed by him, I barely ever listened to Nirvana again. I saw him as weak and Courtney as strong, and I just thought him leaving Frances was unforgivable. I also feel like he was a bit of a pissy cunt; at one point in this documentary he goes he doesn't care about the fame, just the songs, but that wasn't true for him, just like it isn't for Morrissey. Kurt wanted the fame, but couldn't live with it when he got it. I always thought he was kind of a dick with how embarrassed he was about being seen as 'mainstream'. But hey, you get what you want and you never want it again, right?
Twenty years later and I forgive him for the suicide; I realise it was a lot more complex than it was inside my teenage brain. He was a seriously ill man, mentally and physically. But Nirvana have stayed in that kind of time capsule for me, whereas I've carried Courtney with me ever since. So it's a weird clash of nostalgia to be taken back to that time.
I think some of the childhood stuff could have been cut; I feel like I've done Kurt's childhood to death; Heavier than Heaven was a bit like Morrissey and Marr; a thesis in Kurt Cobain that we had to read back when we were greebos. I had Kurt Cobain: The Diaries and I like seeing all his doodles and lists and things (like Courtney's) but I wonder if HE would like it? And the documentary being named after his old mixtape? He was so concerned about image that I wonder if he would cringe a bit at seeing them animating his childhood doodles? I don't know, it doesn't quite sit right with me, but then some of his little bon mots were genius. He was a really intelligent man, but he just thought too much. Like when he did a doodle of Courtney and said 'You talk to much.' She does, so he mustn't have had much time to think when she was around. Probably that was part of her appeal.
I also didn't like the animated parts of the documentary that much; especially in contrast to Kurt's own drawings, which were considerably better. I just thought it was a bit pointless or a bit out of place, but my friend didn't mind it.The music was very powerful in the documentary, except for a kind of pan pipes version of one Nirvana song at the beginning, plus I don't like that kids' choir singing 'Teen spirit', it's creepy. But on the whole, the music was just so loud and powerful it just felt like you were being blasted with a hairdryer of pure pain. It was pretty effective.
I was surprised to see Kurt's dad and stepmum in the film; I don't remember seeing much about them before, although I must have read plenty about them and just forgotten it. His dad looked like a square and his stepmum looked like a leathery lizard. His mum is beautiful, and sad. Yeah he got passed around when he was younger, but his childhood was no worse than most people's I know. I think his problems ran deeper; I think his problems were in his psyche and drugs gave him a break, from when he was little onwards.
It was a shame they wheeled out his first girlfriend again; this woman gets more airtime on Kurt and Courtney documentaries than Dave Grohl (more of which later). Would you want your first boyfriend/girlfriend sharing their memories of you again and again? It's just cringey and lowest common denominator..
Krist Novoselic cut a sad sort of figure, in his pristine, Scandinavian-esque house. I think it was when they cut to Nirvana's music blaring out screaming and then cut back to him as my friend Sarah said, kind of 'covering up' for Kurt, it just felt a bit tragic. I liked him in the old clips as the only one with a sense of humour (for the most part, although Kurt was having some moustache-related bantz in the bathroom with Courtney later). Let's be honest Dave 'Kurt hated him' Grohl doesn't have much of anything to offer, and was mainly notable by his absence in this documentary, which I was pleased about. Krist was the real deal, and he must be haunted by memories too, as well as befuddled by the popularity of the Foo Fighters, like the rest of us. There's only so long that Nirvana goodwill should have lasted, and it should have run out in about 1995. God knows what happened there.
All the old Nirvana footage, magazine covers etc made me feel so nostalgic for that time, my brothers, growing up, it was just a completely different time. Every image, clip, song in this documentary took me back to my bedroom, me taping every Nirvana video or performance on the VCR. The most powerful clip was probably the 'Unplugged' footage played to death by MTV and ruined for years, but here you could see it in isolation and just how amazing it was, and tragic. The Smells like Teen Spirit video, seen for the first time, is brilliant. The nuts and bolts of it are beautiful. Criminal what they did to his legacy, really. MTV definitely made me hate several of the songs just because I was so tired of hearing them.
It felt like a very long time until Courtney showed up, but of course, these were some of the most powerful parts of the documentary. I thought we were going to get a Kurt and Courtney sex tape at one point! Courtney is right, he was more beautiful than Brad Pitt and it was obvious how much she adored him. The video footage of their relationship was so personal, and so revealing; the strength of their love, and their addiction. The clip towards the end where she's trying to get him to hold Frances and he's all scabby and nearly passing out was just horrendous. Could nobody see it? Courtney seemed far more 'with it' than him; he was deathly ill at that point, already. I'm certain he would have died one way or the other, it was just a matter of time. Terrifying to think of Frances being brought up by them at that time; but she looked like such a pudgy, healthy baby. I honestly don't know how Courtney and Frances watched this documentary together, it's just so raw.
The last clip of them in the bathroom with Frances and Courtney in the bath felt so personal. When Courtney says something like, 'I feel kind of happy right now' and he said, 'I do, too' it was just too much. He was dead four months later.
Whatever you think of Courtney, and I've heard everything people think, most of the time very much uninvited, he loved her from the bottom of his heart. Getting the crowd at Reading to say they loved her was just beautiful, and I know there are many more examples of this (The Word, etc). Even his death threats to journalists were quite romantic. I think it's sad the way she's never found anyone who can live up to him, who worships her the way he did. Do I believe she never cheated on him? No. But it's irrelevant. Their love was undeniable. I wish we could see more of the footage of the Courtney interview, but then I always want more Courtney. I just find her so fascinating. She is such a strong, flawed character.
The Heart Shaped Box era always gives me a sense of dread, because it was, of course, right near the end. Was 'I hate myself and I want to die' literal? I think we got the answer to that one. 
I'm glad the documentary finished when it did; I don't think any of us could have faced seeing that photo of him lying dead again, or the suicide note eulogy, especially not at that point.
There's no moral to the story, just a really sad, sad memory left behind, as well as the travesty of the Foo Fighters' continued success. And now I'm 34, not 14. I'm a grown up. I work the 9-5, and it's not so bad, it's better than being dead, you know? It might not seem like it when you're a rock star, but it's actually alright.
And Kurt Cobain never got to get trolled on Twitter, or get to be on E News or get doodled on by Perez Hilton. And for that he'd probably be glad. But if only he could have seen another way out. Courtney always said if only he'd gone away to an island, just jacked it all in. But he wanted the fame, and he didn't want it. And if even Frances wasn't reason enough to stay, then there was ever going to be a happy ending. He could have got clean, but he still would have been famous, and mainstream. I just don't think it was what he signed up for - or thought he was signing up for.
For so long afterwards, I waited for Courtney to die, but she never did. She could survive a nuclear war, that one, and that's why I love her. I hope her and Frances are OK and will be OK. I wish Courtney could find someone who loves her, like he did. Yet anyone would be lucky to find a love like that, even once in a lifetime.
And as for those teenagers in Nirvana t-shirts now? You weren't there, man. But we were. And it hurt.

Film: Hit so hard

I went to see the documentary Hit So Hard at the British Film Institute tonight which told the story of Hole drummer Patty Schemel. I laughed at the blurb which said something like 'while egomaniac front woman Courtney drew the attention the more interesting story was happening elsewhere with Patty'. Even the person who wrote that must have giggled a bit. Are drummers ever interesting? Well maybe not, but her story is. The stuff about her sexuality was interesting and her mum was amazing! She was hilarious. They didn't dwell too much on her back story though, the lifeblood of the documentary was the Hole story.
I didn't realise Patty was such good friends with Kurt and lived with Kurt and Courtney in this strange tree-house place! All that footage was really interesting, and was very intimate and personal. It seems quite relevant I watched this today because I had a teeny Kurt vs Courtney spat with a friend of mine on Facebook this week and he said 'Kurt was my hero'. Well, Kurt was my hero, too, once. And some of the footage in this documentary would truly break your heart. There were so many interesting parts. I loved old 'ugly' Courtney with Kurt and baby Frances; I love seeing her how she was, her real beauty. But it's so weird when you see a baby in that environment when people are obviously on drugs and it's frightening and incongruous, and then you think of how it all turned out and it's just wholly depressing. I loved Kurt too, he was truly beautiful, and it's just another heartbreak on my list, which is why I make fun of him a bit now, because he hurt me when he killed himself (I know it wasn't a personal attack on me, but it was a tough time of my life and it felt like it then!) I do wonder what Frances thinks of it all. It must be hell for her.
I wasn't expecting the documentary to be so heartbreaking either: the death or Kurt and Hole bassist Kristen Pfaff was really harrowing (I liked Courtney being indignant that all the 'death attention' was on Kurt like it was some competition). Sounds like Kristen died from the Amy Winehouse treatment; she was trying to get off drugs, and then when she went back to them, her body couldn't cope.
And then there's the crossover with your own life: I was at that Reading in 1994 after Kurt died: I saw Courtney self-destruct and she was my idol because I'd watched my life self-destruct two years before. And my friends weren't on heroin or crack but one of us could easily have died on one of our Fisher Price versions of drugs when I was a teenager. It just takes a bit of bad luck or one one night that goes on too long.
And that's why you never get over the music of your teens because it is intrinsically linked to every vital adult emotion you'll ever feel: love, heartbreak, ecstasy and death. And that's when you feel all of them for the first time and it stays with you.
I always have this dismissive attitude to 'band members': it's like the way I am with Johnny Marr- without Morrissey there's no Johnny Marr, therefore who gives a fuck about Johnny Marr? Johnny Marr and Mike Mogis are just window dressing, and they're part writers. A drummer? They're less than that. But I have to backtrack on this a little now, because I understood watching this documentary that a band is a band of brothers (or sisters) and aren't interchangeable like the Sugababes with replaceable heads. The bit where Courtney ditched Patty from Celebrity Skin and put a LOOKALIKE in the video was truly jaw-dropping. And the way Eric and Melissa sat on the fence was shameful: it was like Jade Goody vs Shilpa Shetty all over again.
A word on the other band members then: Melissa still looks beautiful. Eric Erlandson looks like he's died of AIDS and just looked in the mirror at his own ghost. Honestly, he looks seriously ill. And Patty? Well, she looks pretty much the same as ever. But she's off the crack, so thank god for that. When she basically admitted she sold herself to get crack when she was homeless it was truly shocking. She was extremely brave and honest to admit that. I love the fact she called Courtney for help: that must have been hard. Especially as it was partly Courtney's fault. But I liked Courtney trying to get Patty off drugs in Hawaii and clearly being off her face herself.
I thought this might be one of those documentaries where Courtney would have banned Patty from playing any Hole tunes (let's face it, she bans every fucking thing) but actually Courtney featured quite prominently and amusingly (she was either high or pissed out of her face and appeared to be eating some sort of biscuits throughout - my boyfriend would have gone mad if he'd been there as she was talking with her mouth full at one point).
I liked the bits where Patty and Mellisa were almost in code talking about Courtney going off on one and how they took refuge in each other. And I liked Courtney's indignation at her dress getting ripped off in the crowd, like what did she expect from those animals? A cuddle?
Anyway the really cool part was that Patty came on at the end for a Q&A. Me and my friend John didn't dare ask our respective questions (mine was: what do you think of the current incarnation of Hole?) but the questions asked were all really interesting and she was very gracious and funny about Courtney and said she saw Dave Grohl at a 5-year-old's birthday party recently and he was moaning about getting old and having a bad back.
It's funny seeing everyone there of a 'certain age' ie. my age, all clinging to the past. You just feel part of something. And I left the house and saw the bright lights of the South Bank. Excitements.
Patty came across as thoroughly decent, honest, wise and forgiving. She seems to have found her happiness at last and it wasnt on 'heroin island'. You cant really say fairer than that. It's not easy to get off hard drugs and that must be respected. And it can't be easy to work with Courtney and come out the other side. So good on her. I wrote this blog on my phone on the tube, which is very unlike me, but I wanted to get my thoughts in some sort of order about it. I didn't expect it to affect me so personally, but it did. I thoroughly recommend this doc if you're a Hole fan and there's one more showing at the BFI on Tues, so get down there.
I also saw some of my old kittyradio crew down there, but that's another story. PS: I'm not dead!

Live: Hole at Brixton Academy

A couple of days late with this one, forgive me! Went to see Hole again (thanks, Atomic Kitten) on Wednesday and it was a totally different experience to last time’s horrendous crush. Brixton is such a good venue in that you can get a decent view from practically anywhere, but we had a pretty good spot quite near the front. Missed much of the support band but they looked OK from the little I did see.
Courtney was absolutely on fire. I’d heard good things from the Glasgow gig (thanks for the spoilers, D, I can see why you were excited though!) but I wasn’t expecting this. The set was brilliant, some of it the same as before, but a lot different too. Violet was amazing; I remember vividly being heartbroken listening to that as loud as possible when I was 16, so it felt good to belt that one out with everyone else. She did Nine Inch Nails ‘I wanna fuck you like an animal’ (it can’t be called that- Closer to God?) which I hadn’t heard for 15 years but always enjoyed and her version was great- and she even did a little riff from Who’s Porno You Burn at the end which made me squeal. I’d like to hear that again.
Boys on the Radio was my highlight because it’s my favourite Hole song. I wouldn’t say she murdered it, but it was definitely going too fast and she messed up the lyrics (it has got a lot of lyrics though, as Conor Oberst said when he messed up ‘Joy Division’ by Simon Joyner) despite her reading them off the ground. She was reading the lyrics for quite a few songs; shocking really, I know the words, so shouldn’t she? Still, it’s Courtney. She can do what she wants! Even with that, though, Boys on the Radio was magical; I cried. I never thought I’d hear that live. It was just special and I’m emotional anyway right now.
She did some other nice covers, and a bit of a shitty version of that Smiths song that I don’t even like when Morrissey does it. Is it Suffer Little Children? ‘Manchester, so little to answer for’, as Morrissey would acerbically say. Oh, he is a wag. Can you believe I don’t know all my Smiths facts? I’m a fraud.
I thought Letter to God was really moving, and she did new stuff that I liked such as Nobody’s Daughter and Someone Else’s Bed. Still can’t be doing with the new version of Pacific Coast Highway though; that end is awful.
Hmm, what else? Her banter with the crowd was ace, she kept demanding the lights be turned on so she could see us, and demanding to fuck us. She was really funny and silly. She was threatening to take her clothes off and I thought ‘no way’ but she did and she had the most beautiful underwear on underneath; all purple and black and lacy. She looked absolutely stunning (but still too skinny, eat a sandwich, mum). I wasn’t expecting that as she is in her ‘politician’s wife’ mode of dress at the moment. She did the rest of the gig in her undies. The woman is in her mid forties. She has got balls.
The end was pretty weird, when she dragged up some kid who looked like he didn’t know the words to sing Doll Parts. He looked embarrassed. Her voice was beyond fucked by the end, she was really struggling. In fact all the way through she was turning the mic to the crowd because she couldn’t do certain high bits.
I felt so happy watching this gig, seeing her so adored, and on such good form. I never knew so many people liked her! She’s a one off. I’m sure there’s loads I’ve forgotten. But it was really wonderful. I’m so glad I went again!

Album: Hole- Nobody's Daughter

Mummy's back. And I'm seeing her again next week!
They are selling this album as '12 years in the making', but no one thought Hole would get back together, and they didn't, did they? Even I sold my Hole hairslides, rather too soon, it would seem. I have 80% of these songs sung by Courtney on her own, that I've been listening to for about three years. It would definitely have been nice to have more of a mixture. But hey.
I've never heard the song 'Nobody's Daughter' before and it comes off quite dirgy; but in a bad way, like something off the solo album. I definitely don't think it's an album opener. I like the bit where she goes 'uh' though, but it doesn't really go up or down; it just plods. Ooh, hold on, it picked up at the end a bit. I just don't think glossy and dirgy is a good combination. I'd rather have scratchy and dirgy, or glossy and poppy. Her voice sounds weird at the end of the song; like it's not her. I prefer her out of tune.
Skinny Little Bitch sounds like Molly's Chamber or one of those. It's kind of throw away and generic, but it's got a bit of spark, a youthful energy. I like 'baby just go slower, baby just go lower'; she always has a little lyrical flourish here and there. The end is kind of stupid where it speeds up, but she does scream a bit.
I've never heard Honey before. Ah- there it is. A massive smile on my face. I LOVE it when she sings the word 'down'! It's like when Molko sings 'you' as 'yooooouuuuuuhhoooooo'. Courtney sings 'down' in such a Courtney way; I fucking love it, it's a total trademark. Her voice sounds great all gravelly and raw. I got a 'It's Not Your Birthday Anymore' by Mozzy feeling about it. Oh and you can even hear her catch her breath at one point; I love that, when you can hear the imperfections. The voice sounds too glossy at one point, like on Almost Golden (urgh) but it's only for a second. Woah her voice sounds all over the place, polished, flat, screamy. It's a fucking mess. But it's working here. I think I like it.
Pacific Coast Highway (the demo) is probably one of my favourite songs of all time. It's just beautiful, just divine. The guitar is too loud on this version. I KNEW they'd fuck it up! It was obvious. The backing vocals could go too. The stripped down version is perfect; you can't meddle with it. It's like an acoustic version she did of Hold Onto Me (off the solo album); it was like a different song to the studio version, which was just dreadful. But the core of the song was fantastic. I think she needs to drown her producer. Hmm, she's changed the lyrics to Pacific Coast Highway too. That always throws me when I'm doing my Courtney yell around the bedroom. At least you can still hear her gasping for breath. The guitar solo is overblown and the end bit is just useless. But I don't mind; I've still got the demo. It's like writing; you can edit it and edit it and get too many opinions and in the end it just loses it's way. She's worked on these songs too long.
I didn't like Samantha until I heard her do it on Jonathan Ross, and then I did. It's all over the ockey! That 'people like you fuck people like me' bit is good singalong fun. I get the feeling it might get old quick though. Good scream at the end.
I've not heard Someone Else's Bed before. It seems lyrically confused. The syllables don't seem to fit right which annoys a pedant like me. I like these lyrics though: 'Oh and you'll be the end of me/ As I have been the death of you/ And I quite enjoy your suffering/ Oh I want to watch the view.' And her voice sounds strong. I think this one is pretty good. It seems real. I like the way she drags out 'die' and 'try' at the end as well.
I don't like For Once In Your Life, it's tuneless and meandering. Oh there's actually an extra bit that works better than the other version I heard, at least it lifts it up a bit. I like the use of the word 'gorge' too. They should have scrapped the rest and just kept that bit.
Letter to God is lyrically tragic: 'I never wanted to be some kind of comic relief', but not as good musically as Car Crash, which I notice is not on this album. Boo. It's too out of tune, and a bit self-indulgent. They haven't changed it much from the demo; maybe they should have chopped a bit off. I know, you really can't win!
I think Loser Dust is duff too; it sounds like it should be on American Sweetheart. It's probably the worst song on the album.
I'm also not overkeen on How Dirty Girls Get Clean. I just think it's a bit tuneless. It makes me pine for the real dirgy stuff like Dicknail. Why is it underlining dirgy? DIRGY? DIRGEY. That doesn't look right. DIRGY. Don't correct me again, Firefox. I just find this song really... uh, boring.
And it's not a great finale because I don't like Never Go Hungry much either! It's just too one note for me. I prefer it much more than the previous two songs, but I can see it becoming one of her anthems and I don't think it's up to the job. I DO like her flat singing on it (and her voice totally WENT when she did it at Shepherd's Bush), but I just wish it went somewhere, except where it does.
Believe it or not, I do actually like the album. I just like complaining as well. I'm like this with albums (and mixtapes actually): if it has two or three songs I can squirrel away and love, I'm not bothered about all the flim flam. I will HAMMER the songs I do like until I get sick of them. It's like the two most recent Morrissey albums; nine rubbish ones, but three amazing ones, (OK two) but you'd still kick a granny in the face for decent ones, because they mean everything. And there's stuff that means something on here, too. Courtney means something. It's just nice to have her around, too you know.
Courtney, Conor, Mozzy, Brian. You're the only ones that matter to me. Everything else is just window dressing.

Live: Hole at Shepherd's Bush Empire

The last time I saw Courtney Love was at the Reading Festival straight after Kurt died. I was 14 years old. 14! I’m now twice that (and more!) Obviously, that gig is infamous for being a shambles. But I still remember how I felt just being near to her; just seeing her there was amazing to me, no matter how bad she was (and she looked amazing). That was the summer I grew up, lost my virginity, and had a gang of friends I thought would last forever. I spent the next two years running round in a nightie and a tiara starting fights. Courtney was a massive influence on me as a girl, and as woman.
Around the turn of the millennium, I used to frequent an imaginary place called kittyradio, where Hole fans went to… er, tear the shit our of each other’s personal lives/ appearance/ taste in men. Weirdly, I also met some of my best friends, who I still make an effort to see (which is rare for me) ten years later.
The next time I saw Courtney was at the filming of the Russell Brand TV show, and I was sat so close to her, I could have touched her. I could see right up her skirt! And still I was in awe! Morrissey was in the same room but I was still drawn to Courtney. Her flaws, the things that people hate her for, are the things that make her special.
But I had very low hopes of Courtney showing up when I booked the tickets for Shepherd’s Bush. My hopes were raised a little when I saw her on Jonathan Ross, looking puffy but healthy, and again on the Brits. And she didn’t let us down.
Got to Shpherd's Bush quite late due to the Central Line being royally fucked. Bumped into a fair few kittyradioers; all knocking on 30 now, but still looking good, I must say. Shepherd’s Bush Empire was absolutely HEAVING, you could not move, and the queue for the toilets was beyond a joke.
The support band I saw (I think there were two) were absolutely dreadful; I thought Morrissey’s support bands could be bad but this was something else. The guy gobbed on the crowd, wich makes it sound quite rock and roll; it was anything but. Really dire.
I have to say, a large majority of the crowd were really awful, Morrissey crowds can often be filled with inconsiderate oiks, but this was worse; seedy old men, men who were 8 foot tall, people who actually stank… it was really bad. The last band I went to see were Placebo, and the crowd were all really small, polite lesbians, so this was a bit of a shock. When Courtney came on the guy in front of us (a prick with Jedward hair) literally took up about a square mile around us to headbang in. At that point we moved back, but the view was really poor. Eventually I moved further back and could see, but I was pretty pissed off, which was really annoying.
The irony was, Courtney was on top form tonight. She kept us waiting for a while and then opened with Pretty on the Inside! How cool is that? The setlist was amazing; Violet, Miss World, Malibu, Pacific Coast Highway, Celebrity Skin… she even pulled out Northern Star. I would have killed for Boys on The Radio though, as it’s my favourite Hole song ever, but that’s my only grumble. I think my highlights were Pacific Coast Highway and Celebrity Skin; just because I am so used to hearing Celebrity Skin at every dingy indie disco I've frequented over the past few years, so to see it live seemed surreal.
Let’s get the ‘Hole’ thing cleared up. Yes, her new band look rather rubbish. Yes, Melissa and Eric and Patty were pretty cool. But what makes Hole is Courtney, her lyrics, her songs, her life. Would you go see a band named Hole if Eric and Melissa got a new lead singer? No, you wouldn’t. So, personally, I’m just glad she’s still doing those songs, because they are her legacy. And the crowd, as horrible and ugly as a lot of them were, knew every word. I was surprised there were so many men there; and surprised that people were singing their heart out. In normal life if you mention Courtney Love, people go ‘urgh’, so this felt really interesting. I didn’t think people cared for these songs so much.
She didn’t talk much but I remember her saying ‘not bad for an old girl’ and ‘I’m still alive’. She looked great; and seemed to be really enjoying herself. She definitely forgot the words a few times, and it seemed to me like they played completely the wrong tune to Malibu..?! Her voice went at the end, but I’m not surprised, as she really has to belt those songs. I’ll always love her voice; the flaws in it are just divine.
I think her new material sounds really good. I’ve been hammering the demos for about 2 years now; so I really hope her album does see the light of day soon because we’ve waited long enough!
I wish I could see her again a bit closer; I saw Bright Eyes at Shepherds Bush Empire a couple of years ago and had a great view; so I think I just got unlucky.
Say what you like about Courtney, but she survives, she just keeps on going. She’s also highly under-rated as a song-writer and a lyricist. No woman from her era that I can think of is still going like she is, or is still interesting, anyway.
And at that exact moment I wrote that, the computer a couple of desks away from me just started playing Nirvana out loud in an open plan office… even though no one is near it…! Weirdness! The ghost of Kurt! Get back in your box, Kurt. You’re done.