Why is BB on at 8? Now I can’t watch Corrie or Enders! Badness. I have no internet or freeview at the mo so had to try and get my video to work! I didn’t like it. Old technology; you defeated me. New technology: you defeated me.
Is Big Brother even going to work without the swearing? My reality TV buddy JOTV texted me after work to say Shabby had gone walkies. She must have been missing Uncle Biffa. RIP Shabs. You made your mother proud.
So they’re going to buy Steve a new leg, as his current one is on loan. Some seemed keener on that idea than others, didn’t they, Dave. Leg gate! Who did Steve borrow the leg from? The legbrary? I know I wouldn't want to stump up for it! Hohohohohoho.
I liked Mario explaining history to Corin with the use of the ‘big hand’ and the ‘little hand’. Is he going to make sure she eats her dinner with the choo choo train? Mario thinks the Loch Ness Monster is '20 to 30 meters long'. Unconfirmed reports are coming in that Mario's winkie is 3 centimetres long.
Which cause does Ben want to give his imaginary winnings to? Probably restoring Windsor Castle. Or the Raef from The Apprentice benevolent fund. I don't think it's something he needs to worry about too much as he's going to be out this week anyway the way he's behaving.
Do you think we would have got to see the girls flash if it was after 9pm? Or would it have been hidden from us, just like Mario's dinkle? Conspiracy.
God, I hate Ife. She's a total div. Keever and Shabby are 100% tool, don't get me wrong, but the whole situation just stinks of teenage angst. Shabby and Keever being bitter because someone is having fun? No shit. It's a national cunt disco.
Bedgate! Ooh, Corin is getting angry. Back off, she's radioactive.
John James looked like he wanted to be in the bedroom rather than at the party with proud-to-be-a-moron Corin, Neanderthal Nathan, idiot Ife and Saint Steve. Who can blame him? (And this line-up, by the way, is what you've got to look forward to in the final three weeks, mark my words).
Ife's idea of a 'wicked time' and mine is something different. I think Ife thinks she's coming off as some sort of renegade who we're all sitting at home cheering on when actually we just think she's a whingey little turncoat dullard.
Ife STOP BEING SO SANCTIMONIOUS. Careful, Ife, your dignity is getting compromised. I wish Ife was in a fishbowl, being held under. But to be fair to her, she did say quite clearly 'I don't want to talk right now'. So why not just leave her be?
Keever's neck vein looked ready to pop.
Shabby and Keever looked genuinely depressed in the diary room. At least Shabby actually meant it about leaving this time. So what will Keever do when she's gone? Wage war on Ife? Make friends with Ife?
I felt a bit sad watching her go. I don't know why. Oh yeah I do. It's because as much of a dimlo as Shabby was, at least she had a personality. The rest of the house can barely scrape together one between them.
Showing posts with label big brother 2010. Show all posts
Showing posts with label big brother 2010. Show all posts
Monday, 5 July 2010
Sunday, 4 July 2010
Big Brother 11: Nathan Gnarly
Another day, another task, more contact with the outside world. I HATE these army tasks, they make me cringe.
Oh, Shabby, London doesn't love you back. I thought she was from Milton Keynes anyway? She isn't so proud of the concrete cows.
Ben giving it back to the army guy was quite funny. He did FIVE MINUTES, what more do they want? Haha. I'm glad he put Dave up! Dave's been let off the hook easy so far. He took that quite well, if anything.
Did Dave just go to have a wash in the pool? Urgh.
Shopping list bullshit! Not interested. Vote Nathan out and end his kitchen tyranny. See him give the shopping list up to Josie then stomp off like a complete twat. Dave just wants the men to sort it out. 'Take it outside, ladies'. Shopping is not that difficult.
Keever has been cleaning her teeth for the whole of the highlights. Shabby is SPOILING for a fight.
Oh, Ben. He's not a team player. But at least he's not an uncouth, grunting, rude, ugly, moronic, hairy man-pig like Nathan.
I hate these BBLB tasks! FORMAT FAIL.
Does Keever ever say anything pleasant about anyone? How can someone manage to be so dull and so conceited at the same time?
Look at them scavenging crisps! Hiding them away. RIP Sunshine.
Have you noticed how the majority of the smokers are complete arseholes? Just saying.
Oh Mario, give it a rest. Make up with Ben quick before nomination time. For all the long words he drops into sentences, his emotional intelligence is zero. That make up hug was awkward.
I like the silver sheets! We got silky sheets recently though and it didn't work out so well. Too slippy!
I ask again; why have we never got to see Mario running round naked?! I'm sure he thinks that was his finest hour and it hasn't even been shown.
Aw to Ben not getting his suitcase back. I want to see more of his clobber. I'm sick of all the Ben bashing.
Nathan doesn't like upper class people? NO SHIT. Classist prick. Nathan doesn't know any intelligent people, he probably thinks if you can answer the phone-in quiz on GMTV you're a member of fucking Mensa.
Why IS Nathan so aggressive? Do you think he was dropped on his head as a baby?
John James looks so handsome when he smiles. Shame he's such a numpty. Are him and Josie in love? I can't tell. It feels like it might all end in tears.
Anyway, blah-bluh-bleh, as Morrissey would say.
Oh, Shabby, London doesn't love you back. I thought she was from Milton Keynes anyway? She isn't so proud of the concrete cows.
Ben giving it back to the army guy was quite funny. He did FIVE MINUTES, what more do they want? Haha. I'm glad he put Dave up! Dave's been let off the hook easy so far. He took that quite well, if anything.
Did Dave just go to have a wash in the pool? Urgh.
Shopping list bullshit! Not interested. Vote Nathan out and end his kitchen tyranny. See him give the shopping list up to Josie then stomp off like a complete twat. Dave just wants the men to sort it out. 'Take it outside, ladies'. Shopping is not that difficult.
Keever has been cleaning her teeth for the whole of the highlights. Shabby is SPOILING for a fight.
Oh, Ben. He's not a team player. But at least he's not an uncouth, grunting, rude, ugly, moronic, hairy man-pig like Nathan.
I hate these BBLB tasks! FORMAT FAIL.
Does Keever ever say anything pleasant about anyone? How can someone manage to be so dull and so conceited at the same time?
Look at them scavenging crisps! Hiding them away. RIP Sunshine.
Have you noticed how the majority of the smokers are complete arseholes? Just saying.
Oh Mario, give it a rest. Make up with Ben quick before nomination time. For all the long words he drops into sentences, his emotional intelligence is zero. That make up hug was awkward.
I like the silver sheets! We got silky sheets recently though and it didn't work out so well. Too slippy!
I ask again; why have we never got to see Mario running round naked?! I'm sure he thinks that was his finest hour and it hasn't even been shown.
Aw to Ben not getting his suitcase back. I want to see more of his clobber. I'm sick of all the Ben bashing.
Nathan doesn't like upper class people? NO SHIT. Classist prick. Nathan doesn't know any intelligent people, he probably thinks if you can answer the phone-in quiz on GMTV you're a member of fucking Mensa.
Why IS Nathan so aggressive? Do you think he was dropped on his head as a baby?
John James looks so handsome when he smiles. Shame he's such a numpty. Are him and Josie in love? I can't tell. It feels like it might all end in tears.
Anyway, blah-bluh-bleh, as Morrissey would say.
Saturday, 3 July 2010
Big Brother 11: Oh, Ben, don't come to the house tonight
Ouch! Shabby got caught out there slagging Corin. That was bad timing. Stop digging, Shabby. Corin in the diary room is fairly interminable, though. She’s a nice person, but there’s nothing to her.
Ad break: is it a good idea to call a new skin cream ‘emulsion’? What next, Avon creosote?
Shabby’s reaction to Ben’s task was bitter, but kind of right. Let’s face it, nothing is worse than when they sent Charley out, then put her back in again: ‘hell, yeah’.
Nathan never dares saying something nasty to people’s face, it’s always after they’re just after earshot. They bleeped out the insult he said about Shabby; it’s post-watershed, so it must have been bad. Don’t like the cut of his jib.
I liked Ben’s joke about John James, why didn’t that make the final cut?!
Ooh Mario is really getting nasty towards Ben. I wouldn't be surprised if Mario puts him up next week. Ben says being gay would affect his career in America but he 'doesn't think sexuality is important'. Mario, face it, you and Ben aren't going to be chums outside the house. He's putting up with you and that's it.
I always end up feeling sorry for Ben even when he's in the wrong, he's like a lost puppy. He is shallow, but he's fun, you know. He's entertainment. But he pushes his luck with Mario. Mario has been there for him.
The crowd did not have banners up. I reckon they told them not to boo, too. This mobile home joke stinks.
Wow that took them so long to stand up when Ben came back in I thought they'd been told to stay seated.
There were literally p-p-p-p-poker faces from Shabby and Keever when Sunshine went. I bet Shabby can't fucking believe it! Ha, I'm glad Shabby and Keever don't feel appreciated in the house: FYI it's because you're CUNTS.
Ife is always getting involved in other people's business because she's just a dull wisp of a person.
Mario: just accept Ben doesn't fancy you, love! It doesn't mean he's a homophobe or in the closet.
Thought John James was going for a wank in the cupboard. Turns out he just wants Josie to sleep with him. She should tell him, 'if you want to fuck me, let's do it.' She aint going to get a better offer' especially if her other offer is Nathan.
I feel for Mario, but I think he's tying himself up in knots. His issues are mainly to do with himself, not Ben.
Ad break: is it a good idea to call a new skin cream ‘emulsion’? What next, Avon creosote?
Shabby’s reaction to Ben’s task was bitter, but kind of right. Let’s face it, nothing is worse than when they sent Charley out, then put her back in again: ‘hell, yeah’.
Nathan never dares saying something nasty to people’s face, it’s always after they’re just after earshot. They bleeped out the insult he said about Shabby; it’s post-watershed, so it must have been bad. Don’t like the cut of his jib.
I liked Ben’s joke about John James, why didn’t that make the final cut?!
Ooh Mario is really getting nasty towards Ben. I wouldn't be surprised if Mario puts him up next week. Ben says being gay would affect his career in America but he 'doesn't think sexuality is important'. Mario, face it, you and Ben aren't going to be chums outside the house. He's putting up with you and that's it.
I always end up feeling sorry for Ben even when he's in the wrong, he's like a lost puppy. He is shallow, but he's fun, you know. He's entertainment. But he pushes his luck with Mario. Mario has been there for him.
The crowd did not have banners up. I reckon they told them not to boo, too. This mobile home joke stinks.
Wow that took them so long to stand up when Ben came back in I thought they'd been told to stay seated.
There were literally p-p-p-p-poker faces from Shabby and Keever when Sunshine went. I bet Shabby can't fucking believe it! Ha, I'm glad Shabby and Keever don't feel appreciated in the house: FYI it's because you're CUNTS.
Ife is always getting involved in other people's business because she's just a dull wisp of a person.
Mario: just accept Ben doesn't fancy you, love! It doesn't mean he's a homophobe or in the closet.
Thought John James was going for a wank in the cupboard. Turns out he just wants Josie to sleep with him. She should tell him, 'if you want to fuck me, let's do it.' She aint going to get a better offer' especially if her other offer is Nathan.
I feel for Mario, but I think he's tying himself up in knots. His issues are mainly to do with himself, not Ben.
Friday, 2 July 2010
Big Brother 11: Goodbye Sunshiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine
I don’t really care who goes tonight, which makes for a bit of a dull eviction emotionally. They are all ‘characters’ but none are particularly likeable. If I was in the house I think I'd strangle Sunshine, slap Shabby and just feel annoyed with Keever.
It was hardly like they asked Ben to snog Mario for a task, he only had to do an arm wrestle. He is being a prima donna. Imagine if he'd had Mario's mole task! He wouldn't have got past putting the outfit on. He got away with picking the stand-up role pretty easy. OMG why is he lying to the group about what Big Brother asked him to do?
Ugh that match.com advert was twee-tronising.
This show is dragging so far. This comedy task aint funny.
Sunshine was laughing at the time but she doesn't know why because she didn't find it funny. Well, how is he meant to know that? Sunshine is digging her own grave right here. John having to tell chicken jokes in the middle of their argument was sadistically amusing. That was weird when Josie told him to shut up. They have a very odd relationship.
Who's that person standing next to Davina? Awkward. It's like Courtney Love's assistant filming up her nose with an iPhone.
This lolly task is a waste of lollies. Mmm, lollies.
I don't know if Ife thinks she's making herself look good by detaching herself from Keever and Ife. It doesn't make me think less of her, but it definitely doesn't make me think more of her.
Uh oh, the screen just died. Someone on digital spy said 'have they tried turning it off and on again?' LOL. That was weird that it just came back on and was up to date. Suspicious. Eviction is not live!
Sending Ben out in front of the crowd? This is wrong! This is diluting the brand! There's so many things wrong with this. He gets to see the crowd/ banners etc. He gets to hear a reaction. It's not cool. Big brother has jumped the shark so many times the shark has become extinct.
Ben has come dressed as one of Morrissey's backing band! OMG cringe! Ben is warming to this! His jokes are peculiar. He's got mascara on! I'm surprised he did it.
How weird that Sunshine went after the way Shabby behaved this week. I can't wrap my head around that. Her dress looks nice. I think she looks quite good, actually.
She didn't even get booed. There seems to be quite a friendly crowd tonight.
More technical problems! It's a tight ship they're running this week.
At least Sunshine dealt with the callers quite well. BB is obviously not happy for the housemates to pick the Bob Righter thing as they keep picking nice days. Didn't Ben ALREADY face the wrath of the tree by doing the stand-up?
Interesting that voiceover guy at the end said the loss of vision was nothing sinister! We'll be the judge of that.
It was hardly like they asked Ben to snog Mario for a task, he only had to do an arm wrestle. He is being a prima donna. Imagine if he'd had Mario's mole task! He wouldn't have got past putting the outfit on. He got away with picking the stand-up role pretty easy. OMG why is he lying to the group about what Big Brother asked him to do?
Ugh that match.com advert was twee-tronising.
This show is dragging so far. This comedy task aint funny.
Sunshine was laughing at the time but she doesn't know why because she didn't find it funny. Well, how is he meant to know that? Sunshine is digging her own grave right here. John having to tell chicken jokes in the middle of their argument was sadistically amusing. That was weird when Josie told him to shut up. They have a very odd relationship.
Who's that person standing next to Davina? Awkward. It's like Courtney Love's assistant filming up her nose with an iPhone.
This lolly task is a waste of lollies. Mmm, lollies.
I don't know if Ife thinks she's making herself look good by detaching herself from Keever and Ife. It doesn't make me think less of her, but it definitely doesn't make me think more of her.
Uh oh, the screen just died. Someone on digital spy said 'have they tried turning it off and on again?' LOL. That was weird that it just came back on and was up to date. Suspicious. Eviction is not live!
Sending Ben out in front of the crowd? This is wrong! This is diluting the brand! There's so many things wrong with this. He gets to see the crowd/ banners etc. He gets to hear a reaction. It's not cool. Big brother has jumped the shark so many times the shark has become extinct.
Ben has come dressed as one of Morrissey's backing band! OMG cringe! Ben is warming to this! His jokes are peculiar. He's got mascara on! I'm surprised he did it.
How weird that Sunshine went after the way Shabby behaved this week. I can't wrap my head around that. Her dress looks nice. I think she looks quite good, actually.
She didn't even get booed. There seems to be quite a friendly crowd tonight.
More technical problems! It's a tight ship they're running this week.
At least Sunshine dealt with the callers quite well. BB is obviously not happy for the housemates to pick the Bob Righter thing as they keep picking nice days. Didn't Ben ALREADY face the wrath of the tree by doing the stand-up?
Interesting that voiceover guy at the end said the loss of vision was nothing sinister! We'll be the judge of that.
Thursday, 1 July 2010
Big Brother 11: Who's your favourite European dictator?
I moved house today! Yet still I blog. Why? Who knows. I'm going to bed soon after.
Josie you've admitted fancying John! Stop lying.
Dear Ben, how about not starting sentences with 'one of my favourite European dictators is...' and finishing it with 'he destroyed three orphanages'. Not much of a vote winner. Why are Ben and Dave cuddling like that? It's so weird. Especially when Dave is saying 'stop kissing and cuddling Mario' whilst cuddling him! It's just borderline homophobia. PS. Dave, aliens more likely exist than God.
Mario looks hot today, kind of stubbly. But I don't trust people who don't 'know themselves' tm. Ashleeeeeen.
Ben talking to the tree of temptation was the lolz. 'Hows your father, apples and pears'. Ben loves the word 'dob'.
I like Sunshine being the fly in Josie's ointment.
Every time they've show Ife tonight she's been stuffing her face.
I don't like the way Keever treats Shabby. Shabby overreacts, but Keever does (warning: Jeremy Kyle speak) 'push her buttons'.
Littlejohn has never been more right than when he said, 'you do care, but you don't want to care' to Josie. I still have no idea what their argument was about though. What I do know is, John James is a manipulative piece of shit.
If my best friend carried on with me the way Keever carries on with Shabby I'd fully expect my boyfriend to hand me my P45. Fucked up. She's way out of order.
That feeling where you fall for someone and it makes you want to be a 'better person' lasts roughly around two weeks before you stuff your face with cakes and go kick a small child.
Although Ife is right to tell Keever to watch it, I just can't warm to her. She seems too wishy washy to me and has no clear personality I can hang my hat on.
Ben saying 'is that understood' to the tree was funny.
The way John James carries on with Sunshine does remind me of how my brothers used to treat me (but without the sexual undertones).
Mario to Sunshine: 'we're here and not in the mirror'. LOL. I like her silky outfit.
Random thought: What did Josie get for her special day?
Oh Sunshine, shut up about being a doctor. Never had the phrase 'it's all going to end in tears' rang so true. She was laughing her head off at the time. Sunshine gets on my wick.
'Big Brother is concerned about you and wants one of your friends to come to the diary room.' What is this shit?
Beware, Littlejohn, she's going to have you up on a rape charge next. Mario was very kind to her, kinder than she deserves. She is encouraging her own eviction here.
I can't believe John James got bollocked for having a joke with Sunshine yet Big Brother let Shabby go on the rampage like a fucking animal the other day.
Bed.
Josie you've admitted fancying John! Stop lying.
Dear Ben, how about not starting sentences with 'one of my favourite European dictators is...' and finishing it with 'he destroyed three orphanages'. Not much of a vote winner. Why are Ben and Dave cuddling like that? It's so weird. Especially when Dave is saying 'stop kissing and cuddling Mario' whilst cuddling him! It's just borderline homophobia. PS. Dave, aliens more likely exist than God.
Mario looks hot today, kind of stubbly. But I don't trust people who don't 'know themselves' tm. Ashleeeeeen.
Ben talking to the tree of temptation was the lolz. 'Hows your father, apples and pears'. Ben loves the word 'dob'.
I like Sunshine being the fly in Josie's ointment.
Every time they've show Ife tonight she's been stuffing her face.
I don't like the way Keever treats Shabby. Shabby overreacts, but Keever does (warning: Jeremy Kyle speak) 'push her buttons'.
Littlejohn has never been more right than when he said, 'you do care, but you don't want to care' to Josie. I still have no idea what their argument was about though. What I do know is, John James is a manipulative piece of shit.
If my best friend carried on with me the way Keever carries on with Shabby I'd fully expect my boyfriend to hand me my P45. Fucked up. She's way out of order.
That feeling where you fall for someone and it makes you want to be a 'better person' lasts roughly around two weeks before you stuff your face with cakes and go kick a small child.
Although Ife is right to tell Keever to watch it, I just can't warm to her. She seems too wishy washy to me and has no clear personality I can hang my hat on.
Ben saying 'is that understood' to the tree was funny.
The way John James carries on with Sunshine does remind me of how my brothers used to treat me (but without the sexual undertones).
Mario to Sunshine: 'we're here and not in the mirror'. LOL. I like her silky outfit.
Random thought: What did Josie get for her special day?
Oh Sunshine, shut up about being a doctor. Never had the phrase 'it's all going to end in tears' rang so true. She was laughing her head off at the time. Sunshine gets on my wick.
'Big Brother is concerned about you and wants one of your friends to come to the diary room.' What is this shit?
Beware, Littlejohn, she's going to have you up on a rape charge next. Mario was very kind to her, kinder than she deserves. She is encouraging her own eviction here.
I can't believe John James got bollocked for having a joke with Sunshine yet Big Brother let Shabby go on the rampage like a fucking animal the other day.
Bed.
Wednesday, 30 June 2010
Big Brother 11: It's my lucky hat
BEDGATE! Ben looked befuddled when his bed tipped up. I wish my bed did that, it'd be handy in the morning.
OMG Ben to John James: 'you're a lovely person but you're so stupid.' His morning diatribe was the best. Eat that, John James. Suck it up, idiot box. I would like to have heard the whole hour of that argument.
Questions: Would you give up your personal items for tobacco? Would Dave give up his Bibley? And does Shabby have to always be such an arsehole?
Shabby telling other people to give up their stuff, but she's not giving up her hat? JESUS. She's such a dickwad.
Shabby looks bedraggled. She is projecting all over the shop. She has so little self-awareness it's mind-boggling. John James and Shabby: so misunderstood.
Shabby would rather give up her photos (ie. her FAMILY AND FRIENDS) than her hat. Oh, God.
Big Brother, I DARE YOU to burn the housemates items on a bonfire and show it on a big screen (including Shabby's family photos as she doesn't care about them anyway).
I'm glad Shabby is suffering over the stupid fucking hat, just like they made Sunshine suffer over the crisps.
They should KICK SHABBY OUT for the way she behaved in the 'nest'. That level of aggression is unacceptable. I would feel totally unnerved around her. 'Having a benny'- LOL. Bring back Nikki Grahame, at least she was an amusing spoilt little brat.
Shabby's lucky hat isn't working out so well for her, now, is it? She's fucking UNHINGED. Which family member's photo did she screw up?
I don't think I've seen someone make such a prick of themselves on Big Brother for years! It really is spectacular. I hope Keever watches back Shabby calling her a bitch and saying she was basically a tease.
Josie: 'whenever I feel a bit low, I always think of that woman who got her face ripped off by a chimpanzee'. I DARE you to say that to Shabby right now. I double dare you. Me and my best friend are always going on about that chimpanzee. The reason he did it was because the woman had had a haircut and he didn't recognise her! Haha. I recommend the 999 call. It's a horror show.
LOL to Ife coming out and celebrating the tobacco! Shabby soon crawled back round. Can you imagine the atmosphere Shabby is creating in there? She's a fucking MONSTER!
I liked the red herring about Shabby winning the task. Thank fuck she didn't. She needs to leave before she's fucking stretchered out.
Ooh Keever. Bad loser. Shabby was happy Keever was up. I fucking pray Shabby and Keever do go together, the nasty fucking pair. Good riddance to bad rubbish.
Keever is probably desperate to leave and see her boyfriend.
Dave is SO insincere. He's not gutted in the slightest. Keever was rude to him, though.
I can see why Shabby is attached to that hat. Her hair is shit. Sometimes I wake up in the morning with my fringe looking like that. The answer is simple: wash it.
John James in a wheelchair? Shame no one's broken his legs.
'What have I done?' Shabby laments. Where to start? When John James is your best ally you know you're so far up shit street you're blocking the toilet.
OMG Ben to John James: 'you're a lovely person but you're so stupid.' His morning diatribe was the best. Eat that, John James. Suck it up, idiot box. I would like to have heard the whole hour of that argument.
Questions: Would you give up your personal items for tobacco? Would Dave give up his Bibley? And does Shabby have to always be such an arsehole?
Shabby telling other people to give up their stuff, but she's not giving up her hat? JESUS. She's such a dickwad.
Shabby looks bedraggled. She is projecting all over the shop. She has so little self-awareness it's mind-boggling. John James and Shabby: so misunderstood.
Shabby would rather give up her photos (ie. her FAMILY AND FRIENDS) than her hat. Oh, God.
Big Brother, I DARE YOU to burn the housemates items on a bonfire and show it on a big screen (including Shabby's family photos as she doesn't care about them anyway).
I'm glad Shabby is suffering over the stupid fucking hat, just like they made Sunshine suffer over the crisps.
They should KICK SHABBY OUT for the way she behaved in the 'nest'. That level of aggression is unacceptable. I would feel totally unnerved around her. 'Having a benny'- LOL. Bring back Nikki Grahame, at least she was an amusing spoilt little brat.
Shabby's lucky hat isn't working out so well for her, now, is it? She's fucking UNHINGED. Which family member's photo did she screw up?
I don't think I've seen someone make such a prick of themselves on Big Brother for years! It really is spectacular. I hope Keever watches back Shabby calling her a bitch and saying she was basically a tease.
Josie: 'whenever I feel a bit low, I always think of that woman who got her face ripped off by a chimpanzee'. I DARE you to say that to Shabby right now. I double dare you. Me and my best friend are always going on about that chimpanzee. The reason he did it was because the woman had had a haircut and he didn't recognise her! Haha. I recommend the 999 call. It's a horror show.
LOL to Ife coming out and celebrating the tobacco! Shabby soon crawled back round. Can you imagine the atmosphere Shabby is creating in there? She's a fucking MONSTER!
I liked the red herring about Shabby winning the task. Thank fuck she didn't. She needs to leave before she's fucking stretchered out.
Ooh Keever. Bad loser. Shabby was happy Keever was up. I fucking pray Shabby and Keever do go together, the nasty fucking pair. Good riddance to bad rubbish.
Keever is probably desperate to leave and see her boyfriend.
Dave is SO insincere. He's not gutted in the slightest. Keever was rude to him, though.
I can see why Shabby is attached to that hat. Her hair is shit. Sometimes I wake up in the morning with my fringe looking like that. The answer is simple: wash it.
John James in a wheelchair? Shame no one's broken his legs.
'What have I done?' Shabby laments. Where to start? When John James is your best ally you know you're so far up shit street you're blocking the toilet.
Tuesday, 29 June 2010
Big Brother 11: The famine of intellectual nourishment
Shabby sleeps in the kohl! But not the bowler. Ife's slagging Shabby. But who can blame her?
Mario, quit with the Bennuendo. It's becoming painful. Ben ignores it beautifully.
Oh, Sunshine, rallying against the world. Stop justifying your lifestyle choices.
Nathan wants to be a porn star. Ben, hand him the razor; off with the body hair, starting with the monobrow. Who would want to attach a string to that fucking ape?
Why is Josie always clad solely in a towel? Why is she so down on herself? Are these two things connected? She doesn't 'make the best of herself' as my mum would say.
Ben wants a morsel from Nathan. I want Nathan to fuck off. Corin nominating Mario! Nooooooo. I've STILL not seen him strip. BB are censoring him!
Quite a mixed bag of nominations this week. Surprised Keever didn't go for Ben again.
IFE YOU MADE YOUR BED ABOUT THE CRISPS, STFU.
John James nominating Ben! What bullshit. Boo. Backstabber.
Josie. Tiresome. You're not nominating Sunshine over crisps, come on now. It's cos she's competition.
Ooh Mario using the word 'mercurial'. Fancy! Shabby, man. You're a donkey. Can't believe she didn't nominate Ben though. Steve voted for the right people!
Sunshine: ironically, the very definition of dour.
Mario believes in karma. No wonder Ben got bored of the conversation. Loved Ben's reaction!
Is Shabby telling Keever off for being nice to people? Fuck me, she's so pathetic. I was more mature at thirteen years old. Shabby's argument went like this: 'you're being too nice to people... you're being spiteful.' Well, which is it?
BAD atmosphere in that house today. Which equals good TV.
I like it when they give them non-alcoholic beer and don't tell them. It's mean but funny.
Oooooh John pulled out the 'love you like a sister' line. Mario is worse than Graham Norton for his crassness.
Aw, Steve needs to win to get some new legs. Don't put robo-Steve back in the cupboard.
John James on the Bible: 'how can you read that shit, it doesn't even make sense! I could have wrote it better than that.' They should put that on the back. That drunk thing really makes my skin crawl. 'High on the holy ghost' indeed. Get him out this week. He's a homophobe and a fantasist.
Don't antagonise the John James! You'll be in his firing line next. And you WON'T LIKE IT. He didn't come out of a lemon tree. Whatever that means.
PS. Don't piss on my back and tell me it's raining. Now you wouldn't hear THAT come out of Ben's mouth.
Mario, quit with the Bennuendo. It's becoming painful. Ben ignores it beautifully.
Oh, Sunshine, rallying against the world. Stop justifying your lifestyle choices.
Nathan wants to be a porn star. Ben, hand him the razor; off with the body hair, starting with the monobrow. Who would want to attach a string to that fucking ape?
Why is Josie always clad solely in a towel? Why is she so down on herself? Are these two things connected? She doesn't 'make the best of herself' as my mum would say.
Ben wants a morsel from Nathan. I want Nathan to fuck off. Corin nominating Mario! Nooooooo. I've STILL not seen him strip. BB are censoring him!
Quite a mixed bag of nominations this week. Surprised Keever didn't go for Ben again.
IFE YOU MADE YOUR BED ABOUT THE CRISPS, STFU.
John James nominating Ben! What bullshit. Boo. Backstabber.
Josie. Tiresome. You're not nominating Sunshine over crisps, come on now. It's cos she's competition.
Ooh Mario using the word 'mercurial'. Fancy! Shabby, man. You're a donkey. Can't believe she didn't nominate Ben though. Steve voted for the right people!
Sunshine: ironically, the very definition of dour.
Mario believes in karma. No wonder Ben got bored of the conversation. Loved Ben's reaction!
Is Shabby telling Keever off for being nice to people? Fuck me, she's so pathetic. I was more mature at thirteen years old. Shabby's argument went like this: 'you're being too nice to people... you're being spiteful.' Well, which is it?
BAD atmosphere in that house today. Which equals good TV.
I like it when they give them non-alcoholic beer and don't tell them. It's mean but funny.
Oooooh John pulled out the 'love you like a sister' line. Mario is worse than Graham Norton for his crassness.
Aw, Steve needs to win to get some new legs. Don't put robo-Steve back in the cupboard.
John James on the Bible: 'how can you read that shit, it doesn't even make sense! I could have wrote it better than that.' They should put that on the back. That drunk thing really makes my skin crawl. 'High on the holy ghost' indeed. Get him out this week. He's a homophobe and a fantasist.
Don't antagonise the John James! You'll be in his firing line next. And you WON'T LIKE IT. He didn't come out of a lemon tree. Whatever that means.
PS. Don't piss on my back and tell me it's raining. Now you wouldn't hear THAT come out of Ben's mouth.
Monday, 28 June 2010
Big Brother 11: Fraggle Cock
Looks like Big Brother spent a couple of quid on puppets. Should have spent a couple more on decent housemates. WTF is the Zig and Zag thing about? They are about as culturally relevant as Keith Lemon (and no doubt have the same agent).
Josie's got a good edit on her puppet, I think. Urgh, I'm so over the football thing now. Why is Mario's puppet still a mole?! Steve has a disabled puppet. Tasteful.
I like Sunshine's 'crappy dress'. Her puppet is ugly though. STOP SINGING GAGA.
I didn't like Steve fondling Corin's puppet boobs! SEEDY behaviour, haha.
John James's puppet looks more intelligent than him. I was laughing at the puppets, even though it was just one joke over and over. I want them to have a proper stand-up row. God, are they STILL going on about crispsvegangate?
They should have done Ben's puppet with his little cake shorts on. His bouffant is the wrong shade.
I'm looking forward to the Josie/Sunshine/Littlejohn love triangle coming to fruition. He's playing them both a good 'un. It's interesting that he's attracted to two women who are (physically only) a bit less attractive to him. I could see him being a feeder.
Shabby's a bin raider! Lush. Those Waitrose bins are fantastic, aren't they?
I like the fact Mario and Sunshine's discussion took place inside the wardrobe. You could have it off in there! Are they talking through the puppets in that wardrobe? We need an independent enquiry.
I was trying to think of a pun along the lines of 'Three Lions, a bitch and a wardrobe' for my title, but it was just too laboured. So I gave up.
So they can go in the pool and not use the puppets? You never really see them in the pool this year, do you? I'd be in there like a shot on a hot day.
I love the fact Ben, Shabby and Keever aren't watching the football! Even I would watch the football if I was in there. It's 90 minutes. I'd watch absolutely ANYTHING if I'd had no TV for a month. Still, respect. Haha, even more of them aren't watching it! Hilarious. Damn those lions.
I liked Ife trying to boost Josie's confidence. She shouldn't be made to feel bad about herself because she doesn't conform to some 'standard' of beauty. She is pretty.
Ben on blue eyeshadow: 'you associate it with girls in WHSmith.' What?! LOL.
Josie's crush on John James will be her undoing; and they are both in there long enough for it to unravel BADLY.
Mario and Ben having a squabble about UFOs! Silly.
Ben's barnet is DEFYING GRAVITY. Check out his dressing gown. I liked him asking Steve questions because it was his birthday, it was a nice touch. They all really respect Steve, you can just tell, and I don't think it's fake.
Seriously, is Ben slagging Mario off? Fucking hell, there's biting the hand that feeds you and ripping the fucker off. He can't HELP BITCHING. 'I thought there'd be more reception rooms'. WTF. Ben wants to do a jigsaw. I love it.
Footnote. I did 'Without Me' by Eminem on karaoke first up stone cold sober at a work do once. It was nothing short of heroic.
Josie's got a good edit on her puppet, I think. Urgh, I'm so over the football thing now. Why is Mario's puppet still a mole?! Steve has a disabled puppet. Tasteful.
I like Sunshine's 'crappy dress'. Her puppet is ugly though. STOP SINGING GAGA.
I didn't like Steve fondling Corin's puppet boobs! SEEDY behaviour, haha.
John James's puppet looks more intelligent than him. I was laughing at the puppets, even though it was just one joke over and over. I want them to have a proper stand-up row. God, are they STILL going on about crispsvegangate?
They should have done Ben's puppet with his little cake shorts on. His bouffant is the wrong shade.
I'm looking forward to the Josie/Sunshine/Littlejohn love triangle coming to fruition. He's playing them both a good 'un. It's interesting that he's attracted to two women who are (physically only) a bit less attractive to him. I could see him being a feeder.
Shabby's a bin raider! Lush. Those Waitrose bins are fantastic, aren't they?
I like the fact Mario and Sunshine's discussion took place inside the wardrobe. You could have it off in there! Are they talking through the puppets in that wardrobe? We need an independent enquiry.
I was trying to think of a pun along the lines of 'Three Lions, a bitch and a wardrobe' for my title, but it was just too laboured. So I gave up.
So they can go in the pool and not use the puppets? You never really see them in the pool this year, do you? I'd be in there like a shot on a hot day.
I love the fact Ben, Shabby and Keever aren't watching the football! Even I would watch the football if I was in there. It's 90 minutes. I'd watch absolutely ANYTHING if I'd had no TV for a month. Still, respect. Haha, even more of them aren't watching it! Hilarious. Damn those lions.
I liked Ife trying to boost Josie's confidence. She shouldn't be made to feel bad about herself because she doesn't conform to some 'standard' of beauty. She is pretty.
Ben on blue eyeshadow: 'you associate it with girls in WHSmith.' What?! LOL.
Josie's crush on John James will be her undoing; and they are both in there long enough for it to unravel BADLY.
Mario and Ben having a squabble about UFOs! Silly.
Ben's barnet is DEFYING GRAVITY. Check out his dressing gown. I liked him asking Steve questions because it was his birthday, it was a nice touch. They all really respect Steve, you can just tell, and I don't think it's fake.
Seriously, is Ben slagging Mario off? Fucking hell, there's biting the hand that feeds you and ripping the fucker off. He can't HELP BITCHING. 'I thought there'd be more reception rooms'. WTF. Ben wants to do a jigsaw. I love it.
Footnote. I did 'Without Me' by Eminem on karaoke first up stone cold sober at a work do once. It was nothing short of heroic.
Sunday, 27 June 2010
Big Brother 11: Penalty crisp-off
I saw Ben talking about Coronation Street on the live feed! He said he liked Janice. LOL. Bet he likes her horse fleece.
Oh, Dave, it's not the Lord that saved Govan. It's the Ben fans. Stompy Shabby.
This crisp thing is a total farce. Ife, you volunteered to go out and ask Sunshine! Now you're moaning about it. Moron. Keever and Shabby don't want you in their gang any more so stop sucking up.
Sunshine only likes crisps and bread. Sounds like me! Remember the bag of crisps the gave to greedy Mo once? It was like a BINBAG. *drool*
We don't like external disembodied hands appearing in the diary room! NO contact from the outside world. That included those encased in rubber gloves. Stop diluting the brand!
I can't stand the way Keever and Shabby are acting but Sunshine is such a martyr. I don't like either side, so it's hard to become emotionally invested.
Typical Shabby, trying to duck out of crispgate. I'm glad Sunshine stuck up for herself. Does Nathan ever say anything comprehensible? 'Spoilt bitch!' Nice. Thick cunt.
THEY ARE CALLED CRISPS NOT CHIPS, Nathan, you're not from fucking LA, you shaved chimp.
Argh, I wish they'd shut up about this now. LOL to BB giving them crisps for lunch.
Nathan. Typical football fan wanker. Can't wait to see him cry when we lose. This is the first time I've seen him animated about anything.
That German national anthem sounds like a right old din. That was funny when they sang the national anthem and it filmed them from underneath! Chin cam. Even John James was singing along.
That penalty shoot out looks hard! It was funny, though. Who's that host in Germany? Where's our host? They might be happy now, but they won't be when they watch it.
Shabby calling Keever a viper! OMG Keever grinning about the 'sexual tension' remark! She DOES lead Shabby on.
Nice shorts, Mario. Him and Ben are meant to be, shorts-wise.
I am always amazed out how touchy feely people are in that house, but particularly Dave, Ben, Mario and John James. They are ALL OVER each other. Honestly, I'd rather stab my friends in the eye than have physical contact with them. I'm totally frigid in that direction.
There doesn't seem to be strong mum and dad figure in the house this year. Steve is not really a daddy, in that he's quite laid back and doesn't impose himself on others. I like it better when someone isn't running the joint.
What is going on with John James and Josie? Who knows. But I suspect nothing. He seems as friendly with Sunshine as he is with her.
I watched this whole Shabby/Keever heart to heart on the live feed. I was fairly unmoved by it. It was quite funny when Dave popped up and they didn't know he was in the nest.
Shabby holding out the olive branch to Dave? Well, it is nominations tomorrow. Cynical, moi?
Oh, Dave, it's not the Lord that saved Govan. It's the Ben fans. Stompy Shabby.
This crisp thing is a total farce. Ife, you volunteered to go out and ask Sunshine! Now you're moaning about it. Moron. Keever and Shabby don't want you in their gang any more so stop sucking up.
Sunshine only likes crisps and bread. Sounds like me! Remember the bag of crisps the gave to greedy Mo once? It was like a BINBAG. *drool*
We don't like external disembodied hands appearing in the diary room! NO contact from the outside world. That included those encased in rubber gloves. Stop diluting the brand!
I can't stand the way Keever and Shabby are acting but Sunshine is such a martyr. I don't like either side, so it's hard to become emotionally invested.
Typical Shabby, trying to duck out of crispgate. I'm glad Sunshine stuck up for herself. Does Nathan ever say anything comprehensible? 'Spoilt bitch!' Nice. Thick cunt.
THEY ARE CALLED CRISPS NOT CHIPS, Nathan, you're not from fucking LA, you shaved chimp.
Argh, I wish they'd shut up about this now. LOL to BB giving them crisps for lunch.
Nathan. Typical football fan wanker. Can't wait to see him cry when we lose. This is the first time I've seen him animated about anything.
That German national anthem sounds like a right old din. That was funny when they sang the national anthem and it filmed them from underneath! Chin cam. Even John James was singing along.
That penalty shoot out looks hard! It was funny, though. Who's that host in Germany? Where's our host? They might be happy now, but they won't be when they watch it.
Shabby calling Keever a viper! OMG Keever grinning about the 'sexual tension' remark! She DOES lead Shabby on.
Nice shorts, Mario. Him and Ben are meant to be, shorts-wise.
I am always amazed out how touchy feely people are in that house, but particularly Dave, Ben, Mario and John James. They are ALL OVER each other. Honestly, I'd rather stab my friends in the eye than have physical contact with them. I'm totally frigid in that direction.
There doesn't seem to be strong mum and dad figure in the house this year. Steve is not really a daddy, in that he's quite laid back and doesn't impose himself on others. I like it better when someone isn't running the joint.
What is going on with John James and Josie? Who knows. But I suspect nothing. He seems as friendly with Sunshine as he is with her.
I watched this whole Shabby/Keever heart to heart on the live feed. I was fairly unmoved by it. It was quite funny when Dave popped up and they didn't know he was in the nest.
Shabby holding out the olive branch to Dave? Well, it is nominations tomorrow. Cynical, moi?
Saturday, 26 June 2010
Big Brother 11: Absolute bloody bastards
Josie and Ife calling Ben sneaky right in front of Govan's face. Rude!
You don't see much of Steve but he just seems utterly normal (which makes him a bit of a boring housemate). He's very straight down the middle.
Sunshine is a bit gutsy for going round the world alone (and not just 'for a girl', as John said). I want to like Sunshine but she's just so humourless I find it difficult.
John James on politics: 'unless it's affecting me I couldn't care less'. He's the sort of person who's proud they've never read a book. It's not admirable to be ignorant (but it explains a lot). What a drongo.
Govan is not scared to face the outside world, he lies, his foot desperately tapping.
Human sponges task is not possible. It's just an excuse for Shabby and Keever to have cud. And they wonder why no one is supporting them doing the task. Because you've isolated yourself! Josie knew to do a dive bomb into the pool to get out the water but didn't bother telling them! Hehe.
Is Nathan growing a handlebar moustache? That's the most interesting thing he's done in the house.
Electrolytes angst. Don't use long words like that around John James, Sunshine. You'll short circuit his tiny mind.
I like crisps as much as the next person but Shabby, Nathan and Keever coveting them was just nasty. They (both BB and the other housemates) are victimising Sunshine over her diet.
THAT'S what I'm on about, Shabby. Bye bye Govan. Josie is acting like Govan had some sort of right to stay. The public decide, not you.
Monk weirdo! LOL. Shabby and Keever: you have fucked yourselves. Be as stupefied as you like. 'They're going to take us out one by one'- yes, exactly like you were planning to do to them, except there's safety in numbers, and you two were too stupid to work out that one plus one equals not enough.
Josie is getting on my wick, telling people what to do to 'look like a good person'. I'm on the side of the crisp sandwich eaters. Josie is being a cunt. I didn't realise what a nasty bitch you were. Ahh, it all makes sense now. It's because Sunshine was in bed with John James all afternoon. Hence the claws have come out. It's nothing to do with food. I'd shove that crisp sandwich up Keever's bum crack.
Love Ben's politician speech. He is 'humbled' by our support. Don't compare yourself to Margaret Thatcher, Ben! You aint out of the woods yet.
You don't see much of Steve but he just seems utterly normal (which makes him a bit of a boring housemate). He's very straight down the middle.
Sunshine is a bit gutsy for going round the world alone (and not just 'for a girl', as John said). I want to like Sunshine but she's just so humourless I find it difficult.
John James on politics: 'unless it's affecting me I couldn't care less'. He's the sort of person who's proud they've never read a book. It's not admirable to be ignorant (but it explains a lot). What a drongo.
Govan is not scared to face the outside world, he lies, his foot desperately tapping.
Human sponges task is not possible. It's just an excuse for Shabby and Keever to have cud. And they wonder why no one is supporting them doing the task. Because you've isolated yourself! Josie knew to do a dive bomb into the pool to get out the water but didn't bother telling them! Hehe.
Is Nathan growing a handlebar moustache? That's the most interesting thing he's done in the house.
Electrolytes angst. Don't use long words like that around John James, Sunshine. You'll short circuit his tiny mind.
I like crisps as much as the next person but Shabby, Nathan and Keever coveting them was just nasty. They (both BB and the other housemates) are victimising Sunshine over her diet.
THAT'S what I'm on about, Shabby. Bye bye Govan. Josie is acting like Govan had some sort of right to stay. The public decide, not you.
Monk weirdo! LOL. Shabby and Keever: you have fucked yourselves. Be as stupefied as you like. 'They're going to take us out one by one'- yes, exactly like you were planning to do to them, except there's safety in numbers, and you two were too stupid to work out that one plus one equals not enough.
Josie is getting on my wick, telling people what to do to 'look like a good person'. I'm on the side of the crisp sandwich eaters. Josie is being a cunt. I didn't realise what a nasty bitch you were. Ahh, it all makes sense now. It's because Sunshine was in bed with John James all afternoon. Hence the claws have come out. It's nothing to do with food. I'd shove that crisp sandwich up Keever's bum crack.
Love Ben's politician speech. He is 'humbled' by our support. Don't compare yourself to Margaret Thatcher, Ben! You aint out of the woods yet.
Friday, 25 June 2010
Big Brother 11: Wake me up before you Govan
Dave is really creepy. In reality, I'd like to see him go over Govan, but the momentum seems to be behind Govan and I want to save Ben.
If they cut off my hot water I just wouldn't have a shower. Simple.
Is this a highlight, Mario and Ben playing word association games? Dear lord.
Why are people so antagonistic towards vegans (and vegetarians?) Shouldn't it be meat eaters who have to justify themselves, not the other way around? I think people are so offended by people being ethical because it makes them feel guilty.
Mario is a sexy scientist. Uh oh, Ben's ducking out of the task. This doesn't bode well. I'd like to stick John James to that tape you use to catch flies and leave him there.
What IS this 'rock-ET' Shabby speaks of? That's not how they talk in Milton Keynes.
Govan sitting shit-stirring saying he'd vote out Ben or Mario. What would you vote out Mario for, I've never heard him say a bad word about anyone!
So John and Mario can both suck themselves off. Bollocks.
SHUT UP GOVAN. ARGH. Do any kind words ever leave his lips?
Corin's thicko act is so past its sell-by date it's going mouldy.
I agree with John James about Sunshine's name. If she likes it that much she should be proud to have it on her medical certificate. John James is just going on for no reason, though. But that's his only setting. He just needs one girl or other to antagonise.
Oh God, I'm really scared Ben is going to go. Please don't make it so. Dave WANTS to go! I wish he would.
Ben looks like he's BRICKING IT. Yes, Ben is safe.
EVERYONE in that room thought Ben was going. They look GUTTED! It should have been you, Shabby.
Govan MINCED down those stairs. I don't even hate Govan that much. But I love upsetting the house. Ben has been fucking pilloried this week. Fuck that house.
72% of the vote! Out of four! Cool, I think Ben is more popular than we thought.
'He's a bit stupid and he shitstirs' should be Govan's epitaph.
Govan looked rightly embarrassed when shown his bitch fest. I think he's actually alright, he's just a bit naughty. He should have just bitten the bullet and come out of the closet yesterday.
Interesting Govan said Big Brother was laughing at him in the diary room! LOL.
I thought Govan came off quite well in his interview, he seemed quite affable.
Oh god, why haven't they cut this awful bit at the end where people call in! It sucks.
Govan looks beleaguered. Aw, to Josie crying in the bathroom. I never even knew they were that close!
I wish they still showed them their best bits at the end, it's a really feel good thing that they've ruined. Amongst other things. Ben FTW.
If they cut off my hot water I just wouldn't have a shower. Simple.
Is this a highlight, Mario and Ben playing word association games? Dear lord.
Why are people so antagonistic towards vegans (and vegetarians?) Shouldn't it be meat eaters who have to justify themselves, not the other way around? I think people are so offended by people being ethical because it makes them feel guilty.
Mario is a sexy scientist. Uh oh, Ben's ducking out of the task. This doesn't bode well. I'd like to stick John James to that tape you use to catch flies and leave him there.
What IS this 'rock-ET' Shabby speaks of? That's not how they talk in Milton Keynes.
Govan sitting shit-stirring saying he'd vote out Ben or Mario. What would you vote out Mario for, I've never heard him say a bad word about anyone!
So John and Mario can both suck themselves off. Bollocks.
SHUT UP GOVAN. ARGH. Do any kind words ever leave his lips?
Corin's thicko act is so past its sell-by date it's going mouldy.
I agree with John James about Sunshine's name. If she likes it that much she should be proud to have it on her medical certificate. John James is just going on for no reason, though. But that's his only setting. He just needs one girl or other to antagonise.
Oh God, I'm really scared Ben is going to go. Please don't make it so. Dave WANTS to go! I wish he would.
Ben looks like he's BRICKING IT. Yes, Ben is safe.
EVERYONE in that room thought Ben was going. They look GUTTED! It should have been you, Shabby.
Govan MINCED down those stairs. I don't even hate Govan that much. But I love upsetting the house. Ben has been fucking pilloried this week. Fuck that house.
72% of the vote! Out of four! Cool, I think Ben is more popular than we thought.
'He's a bit stupid and he shitstirs' should be Govan's epitaph.
Govan looked rightly embarrassed when shown his bitch fest. I think he's actually alright, he's just a bit naughty. He should have just bitten the bullet and come out of the closet yesterday.
Interesting Govan said Big Brother was laughing at him in the diary room! LOL.
I thought Govan came off quite well in his interview, he seemed quite affable.
Oh god, why haven't they cut this awful bit at the end where people call in! It sucks.
Govan looks beleaguered. Aw, to Josie crying in the bathroom. I never even knew they were that close!
I wish they still showed them their best bits at the end, it's a really feel good thing that they've ruined. Amongst other things. Ben FTW.
Thursday, 24 June 2010
Big Brother 11: I'm not of a lego mind
Backwards day! That's apt, because half the house is backwards. Did they actually EAT a curry for breakfast? Vom.
God, tasks are so dull, even backwards. What's the point, they know they passed anyway.
A lot of them seem to quite like Sunshine, but I'm not sure why. Maybe she's like a little sister type. They can pull her pigtails.
Josie; 'Mario's getting better looking by the day'. I agree. I liked her seagull story! She's got a good way of telling a story. Seagulls are a menace.
Ben is SO camp. He's such good value, I'd be gutted if he left. How does John James know about Tescos? Do they have one down Yabbie Creek?
Why is John James being all sensitive and caring with Sunshine. It's making me uneasy!
Oh, Dave. You're really boring. Even your controversy is tedious.
Wow, this lot really talk about nominations a LOT. Keever is getting on my wick now. She's just like a big pasty giggling snoozefest.
Oh god, we're onto best mate and SECOND best mate bullshit with Shabby now. Pathetic. This is tragic.
Why isn't equality for all possible? Because people like Ben exist. It's easy to believe in 'an elite' managing things when you are one of the elite. John raised a very good question 'so do you believe there should be a top dog in the house?' and Ben admitted not. Like, there goes your theory. John plays on being stupid a bit, and it works quite well for him.
Did Ben say he wasn't of a 'lego mind'?
I'm glad they're getting bollocked for discussing nominations. I'm getting sick of it.
Nathan seems like a wholly unpleasant individual, with allegiances to no one but himself. Is he going to tell Steve not to bitch? Is he FUCK.
Shabby's going to stay silent all day long. I'd sponsor that.
Ben is CONSTANTLY apologising! No wonder he wants that society with him in charge. He's not playing games any more than anyone else. Why aren't they ripping it out of Shabby or Govan?
My boyfriend just said 'John James basically has his own set of rules that don't apply to anything or anyone else in the world' and they don't apply to him either. Mentalz.
I can see Ben being a politician. I love the fact he wants to keep the hot water thing to himself. Normally they're so desperate to take the rap and seem whiter than white.
Ife is separating herself from Keever and Shabby. Shabby and Keever are crazy to isolate themselves to a group of two; it's so easy to nominate a group of two. Don't they understand how Big Brother works?
I liked the end when they woke them all up. Heh. SAVE BEN!
God, tasks are so dull, even backwards. What's the point, they know they passed anyway.
A lot of them seem to quite like Sunshine, but I'm not sure why. Maybe she's like a little sister type. They can pull her pigtails.
Josie; 'Mario's getting better looking by the day'. I agree. I liked her seagull story! She's got a good way of telling a story. Seagulls are a menace.
Ben is SO camp. He's such good value, I'd be gutted if he left. How does John James know about Tescos? Do they have one down Yabbie Creek?
Why is John James being all sensitive and caring with Sunshine. It's making me uneasy!
Oh, Dave. You're really boring. Even your controversy is tedious.
Wow, this lot really talk about nominations a LOT. Keever is getting on my wick now. She's just like a big pasty giggling snoozefest.
Oh god, we're onto best mate and SECOND best mate bullshit with Shabby now. Pathetic. This is tragic.
Why isn't equality for all possible? Because people like Ben exist. It's easy to believe in 'an elite' managing things when you are one of the elite. John raised a very good question 'so do you believe there should be a top dog in the house?' and Ben admitted not. Like, there goes your theory. John plays on being stupid a bit, and it works quite well for him.
Did Ben say he wasn't of a 'lego mind'?
I'm glad they're getting bollocked for discussing nominations. I'm getting sick of it.
Nathan seems like a wholly unpleasant individual, with allegiances to no one but himself. Is he going to tell Steve not to bitch? Is he FUCK.
Shabby's going to stay silent all day long. I'd sponsor that.
Ben is CONSTANTLY apologising! No wonder he wants that society with him in charge. He's not playing games any more than anyone else. Why aren't they ripping it out of Shabby or Govan?
My boyfriend just said 'John James basically has his own set of rules that don't apply to anything or anyone else in the world' and they don't apply to him either. Mentalz.
I can see Ben being a politician. I love the fact he wants to keep the hot water thing to himself. Normally they're so desperate to take the rap and seem whiter than white.
Ife is separating herself from Keever and Shabby. Shabby and Keever are crazy to isolate themselves to a group of two; it's so easy to nominate a group of two. Don't they understand how Big Brother works?
I liked the end when they woke them all up. Heh. SAVE BEN!
Wednesday, 23 June 2010
Big Brother 11: Monkeys are hideous
Aw, Mario liked the new side to Shabby. That's the IMAGINARY side that Big Brother forced her into. I like that imaginary side of her, too.
Nice to see Keever talking to Mario when Shabby's back's turned.
What has Nathan got going for him except that monobrow?
I liked the Tree's pronunciation of Keever's name. You can't call the tree of temptation 'gross'. BEWARE THE TREE. Shabby had a severe sense of humour failure.
Mario is trying to outrun death! Good luck with that.
Shabby stop hating on the tree! I'd swap you for the tree any fucking day.
How can Ben call monkeys hideous! 'They're like ill-trained people.' Send them to finishing school. Sunshine is pro-monkey.
Keever was wearing that t-shirt yesterday. Mario is looking kinda cute today. Sunshine is really fucking irritating.
Keever's punishment wasn't that bad, and she was eating something. It's not as bad as when they made Basshunter listen to his own song seven thousand times whilst filing Lady Sovereign away in a drawer. I could listen to Ben talk all day long. Well, half a day. I don't think Keever understands the meaning of the word 'punishment'.
They've nicked this 'getting yourself off the nomination hook' thing right off of BBUSA. (Or 'the power of veto, as they call it) I kinda like it though.
Ooh Shabby pushed a table over! It's like Brian Molko at the Kerrang awards all over again. RAWKNROLL. Shouldn't she get in trouble for that? B.E. A.G.G.R.E.S.S.I.V.E.
Keever is going to come out of that task room and kill Ben with her BARE HANDS. I don't think she can take a joke.
GOVAN AND SHABBY DISCUSSING NOMINATIONS! Big Brother; do you need your ears and eyes syringing? This is bullshit.
This task is chav-friendly! Posh people don't know how to use a scooter! What hope does Ben have? Dramatic scenes!
This is a FUCKING DISASTER that Shabby won! A DISASTER. ARGH ARGH ARGH ARGH ARGH. I knew this already in fact I read on digital spy that Shabby OWNS A SCOOTER. This is bollocks. I don't want to put up with another week of her DRIVEL! I AM SICK OF THE SIGHT OF HER. Having said that, I was sick of the sight of her from the first second I clapped eyes on her.
BEHOLD MARIO'S RAGE! Listen to his sub irish/american accent. You won't like him when he's mildly narked. Aw, it's sad seeing him cry. My Shabby hate is unbridled.
Keever's punishment was limp. They should have booted her out on the ear.
They are discussing nominations. AGAIN.
Nathan is the Vinnie Jones of this year, I see. LOL to Ife saying she was bored of the conversations with Shabby and Keever. My respect for her just went up by at least 10%.
Ife, tell Shabby she's a spoilt little cunt. You could win the show. I don't think Ife is used to confrontation. And that's fair enough. She was brave to separate herself from that a bit.
Govan, you're your OWN traitor in the midst. You hung yourself, chicken. Being in love is EXACTLY about losing any sense of right and wrong, Govan. I hope you discover that one day, when you learn to accept yourself (for heaven's sake).
Tales from high society, by Ben. Apparently Gloria Hunniford is 'just as good' as Joan Collins. God, does Sunshine EVER shut up about Lady Gaga?
Dave is drunk on LOVE! Funny that, because everyone hates him.
VOTE GOVAN OUT. If Ben goes, Exitainment productions could go into administration.
Nice to see Keever talking to Mario when Shabby's back's turned.
What has Nathan got going for him except that monobrow?
I liked the Tree's pronunciation of Keever's name. You can't call the tree of temptation 'gross'. BEWARE THE TREE. Shabby had a severe sense of humour failure.
Mario is trying to outrun death! Good luck with that.
Shabby stop hating on the tree! I'd swap you for the tree any fucking day.
How can Ben call monkeys hideous! 'They're like ill-trained people.' Send them to finishing school. Sunshine is pro-monkey.
Keever was wearing that t-shirt yesterday. Mario is looking kinda cute today. Sunshine is really fucking irritating.
Keever's punishment wasn't that bad, and she was eating something. It's not as bad as when they made Basshunter listen to his own song seven thousand times whilst filing Lady Sovereign away in a drawer. I could listen to Ben talk all day long. Well, half a day. I don't think Keever understands the meaning of the word 'punishment'.
They've nicked this 'getting yourself off the nomination hook' thing right off of BBUSA. (Or 'the power of veto, as they call it) I kinda like it though.
Ooh Shabby pushed a table over! It's like Brian Molko at the Kerrang awards all over again. RAWKNROLL. Shouldn't she get in trouble for that? B.E. A.G.G.R.E.S.S.I.V.E.
Keever is going to come out of that task room and kill Ben with her BARE HANDS. I don't think she can take a joke.
GOVAN AND SHABBY DISCUSSING NOMINATIONS! Big Brother; do you need your ears and eyes syringing? This is bullshit.
This task is chav-friendly! Posh people don't know how to use a scooter! What hope does Ben have? Dramatic scenes!
This is a FUCKING DISASTER that Shabby won! A DISASTER. ARGH ARGH ARGH ARGH ARGH. I knew this already in fact I read on digital spy that Shabby OWNS A SCOOTER. This is bollocks. I don't want to put up with another week of her DRIVEL! I AM SICK OF THE SIGHT OF HER. Having said that, I was sick of the sight of her from the first second I clapped eyes on her.
BEHOLD MARIO'S RAGE! Listen to his sub irish/american accent. You won't like him when he's mildly narked. Aw, it's sad seeing him cry. My Shabby hate is unbridled.
Keever's punishment was limp. They should have booted her out on the ear.
They are discussing nominations. AGAIN.
Nathan is the Vinnie Jones of this year, I see. LOL to Ife saying she was bored of the conversations with Shabby and Keever. My respect for her just went up by at least 10%.
Ife, tell Shabby she's a spoilt little cunt. You could win the show. I don't think Ife is used to confrontation. And that's fair enough. She was brave to separate herself from that a bit.
Govan, you're your OWN traitor in the midst. You hung yourself, chicken. Being in love is EXACTLY about losing any sense of right and wrong, Govan. I hope you discover that one day, when you learn to accept yourself (for heaven's sake).
Tales from high society, by Ben. Apparently Gloria Hunniford is 'just as good' as Joan Collins. God, does Sunshine EVER shut up about Lady Gaga?
Dave is drunk on LOVE! Funny that, because everyone hates him.
VOTE GOVAN OUT. If Ben goes, Exitainment productions could go into administration.
Tuesday, 22 June 2010
Big Brother 11: 'What fucking hope have we got?'
I watched yesterday's live feed (well, a soupçon) and John did apologise to him, not that they showed it. Ben is really getting his knickers in a twist. Did Mario once have a personality? Where did it go? I think he left it in the mole hole.
HOLD ON. John would do pants adverts when he leaves? 'You've got to take any opportunity'... didn't Rachael say the EXACT SAME THING and got bellowed into eviction? The hypocrisy is startling.
No shit John James has got low self-esteem. Aw, he got picked on by mean girls at school. I'm going to start calling him Little-John, which works as two separate insults in one. Josie looked pleased with herself; like she'd cracked the rubix-cube enigma of John.
Ooh noms and I don't know who's up. It's gotta be Ben. He's in serious trubs this week. I'm surprised they even let him vote he's been talking so much shit about nominations. I've not seen Mario streaking! I'd like to.
Surely Ben, Govan and Shabby up? They're the biggest shitstirrers in the house. Ben vs Shabby would be sweet.
Nathan nominated Sunshine for being a vegan. Mean. And Ben for being posh, let's be honest.
Sunshine might as well have thrown her votes into the fire.
NO NOMINATIONS FOR JOHN JAMES! Not one! He can literally do whatever he pleases and no one minds. Aw, it's just little John, throwing his toys out of the pram. NO HE IS A PSYCHO.
LOL at the tree calling her Scabby. Ha, that's a brilliant task making Shabby suck up to Ben. So she's going to sell out her principles, yeah? Anarchy. What a bell-end.
Poor Ben giving it the 'woe is me' speech in the face of Shabby's bullshit. Ha, Shabby doing the thousand-yard stare whilst Ben goes on and on. Classic. Ben being led up the garden path... still, this could help his cause.
Smoking is more important than being a vegan! Haha. Priorities.
Poor BEN! He's a sweetie really. Do you think Shabby was counting to 60 when she was doing that hug?
I love the fact that one of Shabby's compliments to Ben was that Ben 'was an excellent dick'. She actually did really well on the compliment front. Not being able to admit that will KILL HER. And Keever is pleased with Shabby for making the effort with Ben! Delicious taskage.
Wow that dinner date was really awkward at first! Poor Keever. Poor Keever's boyfriend. Poor us having to watch it. Is Keever pissed now and succumbing to Shabby's charms? Goodness. I reckon I would twig after that that Shabby had been acting all day. Or is Shabby's personality so superficial that they would buy she would just turn like that?
Garlic tiger prawns and coffee cheese cake. Excuse me whilst I vomit into my satchel.
Cry, Shabby, cry into your bowler hat. I want to see her eyeliner run.
God, Keever sounds so Irish when she's drunk! I kind of agree with Shabby that I think Keever IS interested now. Weird tension. Interesting.
Shabby: 'Lesbians have feelings too'! Keever isn't straight though, she's bi. I think Keever is trying to be kind, if anything. I hope she's not keeping her options open. Surely not?
Shabby's in shit with the tree! That end bit was funny. She's in trubs. There's only one thing for it; send Shabby home. Or Dave. Or Govan. Just not Ben.
HOLD ON. John would do pants adverts when he leaves? 'You've got to take any opportunity'... didn't Rachael say the EXACT SAME THING and got bellowed into eviction? The hypocrisy is startling.
No shit John James has got low self-esteem. Aw, he got picked on by mean girls at school. I'm going to start calling him Little-John, which works as two separate insults in one. Josie looked pleased with herself; like she'd cracked the rubix-cube enigma of John.
Ooh noms and I don't know who's up. It's gotta be Ben. He's in serious trubs this week. I'm surprised they even let him vote he's been talking so much shit about nominations. I've not seen Mario streaking! I'd like to.
Surely Ben, Govan and Shabby up? They're the biggest shitstirrers in the house. Ben vs Shabby would be sweet.
Nathan nominated Sunshine for being a vegan. Mean. And Ben for being posh, let's be honest.
Sunshine might as well have thrown her votes into the fire.
NO NOMINATIONS FOR JOHN JAMES! Not one! He can literally do whatever he pleases and no one minds. Aw, it's just little John, throwing his toys out of the pram. NO HE IS A PSYCHO.
LOL at the tree calling her Scabby. Ha, that's a brilliant task making Shabby suck up to Ben. So she's going to sell out her principles, yeah? Anarchy. What a bell-end.
Poor Ben giving it the 'woe is me' speech in the face of Shabby's bullshit. Ha, Shabby doing the thousand-yard stare whilst Ben goes on and on. Classic. Ben being led up the garden path... still, this could help his cause.
Smoking is more important than being a vegan! Haha. Priorities.
Poor BEN! He's a sweetie really. Do you think Shabby was counting to 60 when she was doing that hug?
I love the fact that one of Shabby's compliments to Ben was that Ben 'was an excellent dick'. She actually did really well on the compliment front. Not being able to admit that will KILL HER. And Keever is pleased with Shabby for making the effort with Ben! Delicious taskage.
Wow that dinner date was really awkward at first! Poor Keever. Poor Keever's boyfriend. Poor us having to watch it. Is Keever pissed now and succumbing to Shabby's charms? Goodness. I reckon I would twig after that that Shabby had been acting all day. Or is Shabby's personality so superficial that they would buy she would just turn like that?
Garlic tiger prawns and coffee cheese cake. Excuse me whilst I vomit into my satchel.
Cry, Shabby, cry into your bowler hat. I want to see her eyeliner run.
God, Keever sounds so Irish when she's drunk! I kind of agree with Shabby that I think Keever IS interested now. Weird tension. Interesting.
Shabby: 'Lesbians have feelings too'! Keever isn't straight though, she's bi. I think Keever is trying to be kind, if anything. I hope she's not keeping her options open. Surely not?
Shabby's in shit with the tree! That end bit was funny. She's in trubs. There's only one thing for it; send Shabby home. Or Dave. Or Govan. Just not Ben.
Monday, 21 June 2010
Big Brother 11: Crisps come from an animal
I realised today that I'm not actually digging this big brother either. There's none of the personalities of last year (Freddie, Marcus) and too many non-entities. Nathan, Ife, Dave, Steve; would you notice if they evaporated over night? The only think I saw of any interest on live feed was when Steve announced what his kids were called: Pinky Precious (sounds like one of jordan's), Tiger, Chico and Ike. Sweet.
Govan wants to leave. There's the door, m'dear. He's gone into a hole made of his own bullshit. Aw, he's too scared to admit he's gay. Just admit it, we might like you more and stop seeing you as just a little tittle-tattle.
I can't decide who's haircut I like more, Govan's or Ife's. There's only one way to find out. FIGHT! Hmm, if that's as good as the jokes are getting, might as well quit whilst we're ahead.
Here's my names for the groups: 'the misogynist pricks', 'the boring cunts' and 'the thick wankers.' The only people I barely like are Ben, Mario, Corin and Josie and the latter three are fundamentally boring.
Crisps come from an animal? Quick, someone tell Morrissey.
Beware anyone who starts a sentence with 'I'm the type of person..' They're right up there with 'I'm not being funny, but..'
Govan fears the 'black community'. Don't worry, the white community hates you too. And the orange community. I actually felt for him a little then; he's so in denial. Let's be honest, no straight person is ever ambiguous about their sexuality. It's as simple as that. That was the most 'real' he'd seemed the whole time, he seemed almost human.
It's funny that during that whole conversation that Govan forgot Corin was in a same-sex relationship. She's a very straight-forward person. I think you'd appreciate having her in the house as a friendly ear.
Oh is Josie next in the firing line for John James' small dick complex? You know where the door is too, JJ. Just keep digging and eventually you'll end up in Australia, I saw it in a cartoon.
Can John James escape nomination this week? Rex survived by whipping up a reign of terror. Is the house pushing his buttons? It's not his fault, the house was asking for it.
JOSIE FTW. SHUT UP. Exactly! What is he even going on about anyway? Jog on! Lol. She's probably your best friend in the house. Fake packing of bags is so lame, but we've all done it.
Aw he's got a headache, poor little lamb. TWAT. TWAT. TWAT. I wish one of the blokes in that house would stand up and tell him he's out of order, because he doesn't listen to women. Come on Nathan, show us what a man you are.
Thank God for Josie! He was cracking when she said she wouldn't stand for it, he visibly blanched. He didn't know how to deal with it when someone stood up to him. That's all it takes, girls! That's all it takes to stick one to little nasty men like that, just stand up and say 'that's not OK'. I wish women knew that; you don't have to stand for that shit, you don't have to pussyfoot round people like that. Just say no and they are deflated.
Aw and now he's crying like a little bitch. What a fucking baby. Bullying didn't work, so he crumbled. Not since Nasty Nick bawled under the covers has someone else's misery filled me with such joy. He is so transparent. Argh! Rage.
Ugh I really don't want to think about Shabby cracking one off, if that's even physically possible.
Ben is treading a fine line with the nomination talk; he's lording it over Mario like some evil king. He's making his enemies too obvious. Sausage roll gate! Formal dinners and functions! Normal rules don't apply when jelly is served, apparently.
Nathan's one line for the night: 'I was a bit scared' when Shabby went 'boo'. I hope those 70 people who didn't get in are impressed with that. It's more than Ife got tonight.
Shabby has such an ANNOYING turn of phrase. Ooh, see Keever getting jealous at the thought of Sunshine's boobies.
John James is a hoodie menace! EJECT him. Pack up your old kit bag and skidaddle. Another argument and I don't have a CLUE what's going on. Good editing.
Eek I don't like the plotting against Ben! Ben could go if he's up and I wouldn't like that. That was Govan and John plotting, not anyone else. John has dropped Ben in it.
Shabby vs Ben! Ding ding! Ben DOES hate Shabby. But she is a total wanker. It's funny when people go 'you're 30 years old!' as if you're different at 24 to 30, like you're suddenly an adult. Dur.
Aw, Mario trying to save Ben's skin. Cute.
John you have fucked up more than once today. OMG, Shabby is such an arsehole. John is being super quiet right now.
Shabby you're such a boring cliche, you sicken me. Ben is a shitstirrer, but so what, at least he's interesting.
Ben didn't look weak and pathetic. Shabby looked pathetic. The Dave, Mario, Ben love-triangle is mildly disturbing.
Housemates! Here's a tip: try not to have arguments just before nominations. You might survive longer.
Govan wants to leave. There's the door, m'dear. He's gone into a hole made of his own bullshit. Aw, he's too scared to admit he's gay. Just admit it, we might like you more and stop seeing you as just a little tittle-tattle.
I can't decide who's haircut I like more, Govan's or Ife's. There's only one way to find out. FIGHT! Hmm, if that's as good as the jokes are getting, might as well quit whilst we're ahead.
Here's my names for the groups: 'the misogynist pricks', 'the boring cunts' and 'the thick wankers.' The only people I barely like are Ben, Mario, Corin and Josie and the latter three are fundamentally boring.
Crisps come from an animal? Quick, someone tell Morrissey.
Beware anyone who starts a sentence with 'I'm the type of person..' They're right up there with 'I'm not being funny, but..'
Govan fears the 'black community'. Don't worry, the white community hates you too. And the orange community. I actually felt for him a little then; he's so in denial. Let's be honest, no straight person is ever ambiguous about their sexuality. It's as simple as that. That was the most 'real' he'd seemed the whole time, he seemed almost human.
It's funny that during that whole conversation that Govan forgot Corin was in a same-sex relationship. She's a very straight-forward person. I think you'd appreciate having her in the house as a friendly ear.
Oh is Josie next in the firing line for John James' small dick complex? You know where the door is too, JJ. Just keep digging and eventually you'll end up in Australia, I saw it in a cartoon.
Can John James escape nomination this week? Rex survived by whipping up a reign of terror. Is the house pushing his buttons? It's not his fault, the house was asking for it.
JOSIE FTW. SHUT UP. Exactly! What is he even going on about anyway? Jog on! Lol. She's probably your best friend in the house. Fake packing of bags is so lame, but we've all done it.
Aw he's got a headache, poor little lamb. TWAT. TWAT. TWAT. I wish one of the blokes in that house would stand up and tell him he's out of order, because he doesn't listen to women. Come on Nathan, show us what a man you are.
Thank God for Josie! He was cracking when she said she wouldn't stand for it, he visibly blanched. He didn't know how to deal with it when someone stood up to him. That's all it takes, girls! That's all it takes to stick one to little nasty men like that, just stand up and say 'that's not OK'. I wish women knew that; you don't have to stand for that shit, you don't have to pussyfoot round people like that. Just say no and they are deflated.
Aw and now he's crying like a little bitch. What a fucking baby. Bullying didn't work, so he crumbled. Not since Nasty Nick bawled under the covers has someone else's misery filled me with such joy. He is so transparent. Argh! Rage.
Ugh I really don't want to think about Shabby cracking one off, if that's even physically possible.
Ben is treading a fine line with the nomination talk; he's lording it over Mario like some evil king. He's making his enemies too obvious. Sausage roll gate! Formal dinners and functions! Normal rules don't apply when jelly is served, apparently.
Nathan's one line for the night: 'I was a bit scared' when Shabby went 'boo'. I hope those 70 people who didn't get in are impressed with that. It's more than Ife got tonight.
Shabby has such an ANNOYING turn of phrase. Ooh, see Keever getting jealous at the thought of Sunshine's boobies.
John James is a hoodie menace! EJECT him. Pack up your old kit bag and skidaddle. Another argument and I don't have a CLUE what's going on. Good editing.
Eek I don't like the plotting against Ben! Ben could go if he's up and I wouldn't like that. That was Govan and John plotting, not anyone else. John has dropped Ben in it.
Shabby vs Ben! Ding ding! Ben DOES hate Shabby. But she is a total wanker. It's funny when people go 'you're 30 years old!' as if you're different at 24 to 30, like you're suddenly an adult. Dur.
Aw, Mario trying to save Ben's skin. Cute.
John you have fucked up more than once today. OMG, Shabby is such an arsehole. John is being super quiet right now.
Shabby you're such a boring cliche, you sicken me. Ben is a shitstirrer, but so what, at least he's interesting.
Ben didn't look weak and pathetic. Shabby looked pathetic. The Dave, Mario, Ben love-triangle is mildly disturbing.
Housemates! Here's a tip: try not to have arguments just before nominations. You might survive longer.
Sunday, 20 June 2010
Big Brother 11: Corin-ocho flow
Hmm, 15 minutes in and I've not written a word. That's not a good sign. We don't even have John James's psychotic Rachael baiting to suffer through any more. Ugh; I can't believe Dave is getting away with that Bible shit. Rubbish. Pest control? He's a fucking pest. God is so much fun! Yeah, fire and brimstone... LOL. Ooh, Nathan speaks. Seriously, what is the point in him?
I don't like them getting to watch bits of BBLB. Haven't they suffered enough? This candle task is dull as fuck.
Ben is like a cut-price Richard Kay. I don't like these weird people being in the diary room. They are supposed to be cut off from the outside world. Dur.
Josie: 'do your friend put their car keys in a fruit bowl?' What programmes has she been watching?! Ben: 'No, I don't have a car.'
No wonder John James is so angry, he's probably still grieving. Still, no need to be such a tool about it.
Shabby is being an idiot about this Keever thing. Keever is in a happy relationship. Shabby has no right to put her on the spot like that, she should just accept the way things are. I don't want to think about Shabby on heat.
Good advert for Steve's wheelchair basketball club.
They seems a bit young for singing the Raggydolls theme tune, it's more my era.
Aw, I liked seeing them all happy dancing to Erasure.
Keever and Shabby extolling their obscure record collections. The Knife? It's not exactly Anal Cunt, is it. Shabby's music taste was too obscure to play into the house, so she picked something more popular. What a hero.
Keever: 'we're like sisters'. Yeah, scissor sisters. Ah, this is proper cringe! I could just die right now. It's like 'it's not you, it's me' all over again. This is proper embarrassing. Awkward.
Keever knows exactly what's going on, I think. It was good of her to say nothing would change. I wouldn't sleep in a bed with someone who fancied me, it's too weird, and cruel on Shabby, really.
I don't like them getting to watch bits of BBLB. Haven't they suffered enough? This candle task is dull as fuck.
Ben is like a cut-price Richard Kay. I don't like these weird people being in the diary room. They are supposed to be cut off from the outside world. Dur.
Josie: 'do your friend put their car keys in a fruit bowl?' What programmes has she been watching?! Ben: 'No, I don't have a car.'
No wonder John James is so angry, he's probably still grieving. Still, no need to be such a tool about it.
Shabby is being an idiot about this Keever thing. Keever is in a happy relationship. Shabby has no right to put her on the spot like that, she should just accept the way things are. I don't want to think about Shabby on heat.
Good advert for Steve's wheelchair basketball club.
They seems a bit young for singing the Raggydolls theme tune, it's more my era.
Aw, I liked seeing them all happy dancing to Erasure.
Keever and Shabby extolling their obscure record collections. The Knife? It's not exactly Anal Cunt, is it. Shabby's music taste was too obscure to play into the house, so she picked something more popular. What a hero.
Keever: 'we're like sisters'. Yeah, scissor sisters. Ah, this is proper cringe! I could just die right now. It's like 'it's not you, it's me' all over again. This is proper embarrassing. Awkward.
Keever knows exactly what's going on, I think. It was good of her to say nothing would change. I wouldn't sleep in a bed with someone who fancied me, it's too weird, and cruel on Shabby, really.
Saturday, 19 June 2010
Big Brother 11: Get someone out
Ooh a little tipsy so forgive me for my bad spelling/ misguided loyalties.
Steve is a dullard! He doesn't interest me in the slightest. Shabby is such a dickwad. I hate the fact she thinks she's popular. She's as popular as herpes. She is so Milton Keynes. A boring cunt trying to be different.
Steve's computer knee is on the blink. He needs to charge it up! Try Duracell.
Josie: 'you've got a lot of respect for women'. to John James. Riiiiiight.
Nathan's one line for tonight: 'I'll sleep with anyone, me.'
VUVUZELA. If you like the world cup, I hate you.
Ben needs to watch himself, he's rubbing the laydeez up the wrong way. Sunshine is being a little rat. Po-faced. Ben's apology was completely disingenuous. But I don't blame him. I wish Sunshine OR Shabby had gone over Rachael.
Aw, poor John James, he's so pig thick he thinks Ben and Sunshine are geniuses.
Did Shabby just say you can't experience real emotions in the real world, just in the Big Brother house?
Is Ben really straightening that mop? I can't wait to see what it looks like after a few weeks, especially now they've kicked out the one hairdresser in there. (If he doesn't get the booty)
Rachael didn't get badly booed. Get someone out! Bullshit. Why would anyone chant that? Come on! Sunshine aint that dense.
Mario's shirt is cool! God, Sunshine demands SO much attention. It's desperate.
Can Corin get any brighter? She's virtually glowing.
Wow, tonight was a really boring episode. And I was drunk.
Steve is a dullard! He doesn't interest me in the slightest. Shabby is such a dickwad. I hate the fact she thinks she's popular. She's as popular as herpes. She is so Milton Keynes. A boring cunt trying to be different.
Steve's computer knee is on the blink. He needs to charge it up! Try Duracell.
Josie: 'you've got a lot of respect for women'. to John James. Riiiiiight.
Nathan's one line for tonight: 'I'll sleep with anyone, me.'
VUVUZELA. If you like the world cup, I hate you.
Ben needs to watch himself, he's rubbing the laydeez up the wrong way. Sunshine is being a little rat. Po-faced. Ben's apology was completely disingenuous. But I don't blame him. I wish Sunshine OR Shabby had gone over Rachael.
Aw, poor John James, he's so pig thick he thinks Ben and Sunshine are geniuses.
Did Shabby just say you can't experience real emotions in the real world, just in the Big Brother house?
Is Ben really straightening that mop? I can't wait to see what it looks like after a few weeks, especially now they've kicked out the one hairdresser in there. (If he doesn't get the booty)
Rachael didn't get badly booed. Get someone out! Bullshit. Why would anyone chant that? Come on! Sunshine aint that dense.
Mario's shirt is cool! God, Sunshine demands SO much attention. It's desperate.
Can Corin get any brighter? She's virtually glowing.
Wow, tonight was a really boring episode. And I was drunk.
Friday, 18 June 2010
Big Brother 11: Psst! Eviction (Like blogging a shipwreck)
The BB house looks good all lit up like that. Why do we have to have a constant recap? It's like we've got collective amnesia. I REMEMBER WHAT HAPPENED ONE WEEK AGO. Thanks BB.
The most vicious animal on the planet is a shetland pony! I think I'll take my chances with that over a grizzly bear. Hermaphrodite hens! Horses watching TV! Josie is like Chris Packham with a tan. She just made me laugh three times in a row. Not bad.
25 minutes in and there's been THREE adverts. Stop telling me what's coming up and just let me watch something, FFS.
I'd like to chuck rubbish over John James. It's PATHETIC that Racheal still fancies him after the way he's behaved towards her. She must have serious daddy issues.
Ife is a thicko! I bet John James knows all about Skippy the bush kangaroo, the dag.
This is the fourth advert in 34 minutes. There's been an advert every six minutes. Glad I'm not watching live.
John always seems to pick on Fiancee when she's washing her hair or just gone to bed, so she looks a bit minky. WHY IS HE SHOUTING AT HER ALL THE TIME! God, I'd certainly like to date John James and be verbally abused by him. What a catch! I notice they only show her crying after the phonelines close.
Why won't someone stand up to him? Why won't someone say 'you're not being fair'? How can anyone's tactic be to fence-sit in there? The heroes of the house are always the ones who stand up for what's right. Have they never watched this show? Big Brother, give him some stick! He's LIVID! What is his problem? She hasn't actually done anything! Even if she was doing 'the look' 24/7 she wouldn't deserve that. BB should be telling him off a lot more, not pandering to his twaddle.
I like Corin. Her lies were all bizarre. Colonic irrigation! All her lies are just variations on a theme, but they're cute.
I'm really torn on who I want evicted. I'd like to see more of all of them, really. I guess Shabby is the ideal, as she's fairly 2 dimensional. If Rachael goes, John James will feel vindicated. But there's definitely some mileage in Sunshine yet.
Haha, how could Corin be pregnant, isn't she a lesbian! That's a great lie. Respect to her.
I like Rachael's hair frizzy, it looks nice. That was the quickest make-up hug in history. I think she's some sort of masochist.
My boyfriend is hating on BB! Boooooooooooo! He said it's like blogging a shipwreck. Sob.
Ooh they are letting them hear the baying crowd again! They aren't chanting 'get someone out' you idiots, they were chanting 'get SUNSHINE out'! Aw, poor Racheal. She didn't really deserve that, especially since she wasn't even up for nomination this week. She didn't even get booed, or was the music just covering up the boos?
Rachael looks lovely with straight hair.
That VT was harsh! They shouldn't have shown him saying he fucking hated her, it was cruel.
Ooh, it's like BB USA with the goodbye messages! The one from John James must stick in the craw.
WTF is this end bit all about?! Making them listen to messageboard comments about them! This is as bad as when they had the 'panel' discussing them! Someone rang up and moaned about Rachael's skimpy clothing upsetting her grandchildren! ALL those comments were nasty. Haters, women haters of all varieties! Divine. Scrap that section, please. I don't want to hear from the great British arseholes.
Racheal was dignified to the end. I would have stuck it to John James old skool style.
Bye Rachael. I guess it's straight down to Nuts. Sigh.
The most vicious animal on the planet is a shetland pony! I think I'll take my chances with that over a grizzly bear. Hermaphrodite hens! Horses watching TV! Josie is like Chris Packham with a tan. She just made me laugh three times in a row. Not bad.
25 minutes in and there's been THREE adverts. Stop telling me what's coming up and just let me watch something, FFS.
I'd like to chuck rubbish over John James. It's PATHETIC that Racheal still fancies him after the way he's behaved towards her. She must have serious daddy issues.
Ife is a thicko! I bet John James knows all about Skippy the bush kangaroo, the dag.
This is the fourth advert in 34 minutes. There's been an advert every six minutes. Glad I'm not watching live.
John always seems to pick on Fiancee when she's washing her hair or just gone to bed, so she looks a bit minky. WHY IS HE SHOUTING AT HER ALL THE TIME! God, I'd certainly like to date John James and be verbally abused by him. What a catch! I notice they only show her crying after the phonelines close.
Why won't someone stand up to him? Why won't someone say 'you're not being fair'? How can anyone's tactic be to fence-sit in there? The heroes of the house are always the ones who stand up for what's right. Have they never watched this show? Big Brother, give him some stick! He's LIVID! What is his problem? She hasn't actually done anything! Even if she was doing 'the look' 24/7 she wouldn't deserve that. BB should be telling him off a lot more, not pandering to his twaddle.
I like Corin. Her lies were all bizarre. Colonic irrigation! All her lies are just variations on a theme, but they're cute.
I'm really torn on who I want evicted. I'd like to see more of all of them, really. I guess Shabby is the ideal, as she's fairly 2 dimensional. If Rachael goes, John James will feel vindicated. But there's definitely some mileage in Sunshine yet.
Haha, how could Corin be pregnant, isn't she a lesbian! That's a great lie. Respect to her.
I like Rachael's hair frizzy, it looks nice. That was the quickest make-up hug in history. I think she's some sort of masochist.
My boyfriend is hating on BB! Boooooooooooo! He said it's like blogging a shipwreck. Sob.
Ooh they are letting them hear the baying crowd again! They aren't chanting 'get someone out' you idiots, they were chanting 'get SUNSHINE out'! Aw, poor Racheal. She didn't really deserve that, especially since she wasn't even up for nomination this week. She didn't even get booed, or was the music just covering up the boos?
Rachael looks lovely with straight hair.
That VT was harsh! They shouldn't have shown him saying he fucking hated her, it was cruel.
Ooh, it's like BB USA with the goodbye messages! The one from John James must stick in the craw.
WTF is this end bit all about?! Making them listen to messageboard comments about them! This is as bad as when they had the 'panel' discussing them! Someone rang up and moaned about Rachael's skimpy clothing upsetting her grandchildren! ALL those comments were nasty. Haters, women haters of all varieties! Divine. Scrap that section, please. I don't want to hear from the great British arseholes.
Racheal was dignified to the end. I would have stuck it to John James old skool style.
Bye Rachael. I guess it's straight down to Nuts. Sigh.
Thursday, 17 June 2010
Big Brother 11: You got the look
Had a little sift through the live feed last night and fast forwarded any time Govan or Shabby was on. It works fairly well. I wish Mario, Ben, Sunshine, Nathan, Steve and Dave stayed up a bit later. Keever and Ife's conversational topics are somewhat lightweight.
John James has got ripped jeans on. They're probably fashionable in Australia. God, the look, the look, the look! STFU. If you don't like me, don't look at me. Personally, I'd rather have gum on my shoes than John James in my house. 'At the end of the day.. I don't really care. She's ugly.' Classic schoolboy bullying tactics. Why does John James fancy Corin? He must be used to those leathery faces because of all the sunshine down under, mate. She looks like the scrapings off of David Dickinson's vanity table.
LAMINATOR. Begone. John James gave him a look like he was a piece of shit. Oh, he is.
Eww, Rachael being so vile to Ben. Ben is worth 75 of her. It's sad seeing Mario pawing at Ben and Ben pawing at Rachael. Mcdaddy swerve-on! Ben just pretended not to notice the implications of that conversation. Saved by the bogey.
Sunshine looks kinda cute today. Her lipstick is good. I think I'm in love with Ben a bit. He's got a very strange face but he's just so dignified. Marylebone indeed.
Racheal (sorry, FIANCEE) DOES actually have that look on her face all the time, like she's above it all. But even so. You'd have thought she'd murdered Stefan Dennis and hung him off the Sydney Harbour bridge the way John James is going on.
Why don't they ever show Steve or Nathan?! It's rubbish. I probably don't like them, but I'd like some more evidence to go on.
Oh god, not eating tasks. BB is meant to be the trendsetter of reality shows; not leeching off stale I'm a Celebrity ideas.
Josie is kind of cool, I think she's slowly turning into a class act. She never gets involved in the bitching. I think she's cute, too. It's not her fault she's pear-shaped. Her being sick in that bucket was funny (especially after I just called her classy).
Fiancee; you've got zero chance of changing John's opinion of you. Plus, why fancy someone just because they are good looking? His personality is loathsome.
WHAT ABOUT THE LOOK ON YOUR FACE JOHN JAMES YOU REPETITIVE STRAIN INJURY OF A MAN?
You should be glad he leaves the room when you walk in, Rachael. He's a nasty, poisonous bastard. I'd go up to him and tell him to go fuck himself.
That sucks when you're slagging someone off who's in the same room. We've all done it.
Shabby in Nuts with her tits out! Let's guess the headline. 'Not too Shabby?' Lordy. How DARE John James get angry about that, it's none of his fucking business. He is unnerving, he should be on a warning. He puts me on edge.
Good on Corin for speaking out. Don't fucking apologise to him. Shabby: 'I hope someone's speaking out';- why don't you go and fucking speak out? It could save your contrived little arse.
It's a bit rich John James telling people how to make money when he's living off a fucking inheritance. It's none of his business what reason people are in there for, what they do to make money, what they do with their own bodies. Have you ever seen John James have a go at a man in the house? Noooooo! Just the women! Woman-hating misogynistic cunt. Why is he so angry at everything? Did he get his ickle heart broken once? Boo hoo! Tosser. He doesn't want a blowjob in case it degrades you, he'd prefer you slit your wrists to get away from his instead.
Come on Nathan! Get your one line in: 'you've got feelings and stuff'. Brilliant.
Uh oh! Ben- all boys together! The fumble cats. Washer women indeed! Don't back someone up just because he's got a penis. OMG sexism united. And lesbianist too. Feminism is not a dirty word! They were just standing up for their friends. He called Shabby volatile- what does he think John James is? Timid? Mario trying to turn Ben gay at the end of that conversation was funny; it just might work after several weeks. I still love Ben, only slightly less than I used to.
John James: 'guys are different, they just don't bitch.' ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS?! *speechless*
There's so many people in the wrong here, I barely know where to start. Evict them ALL!
John James has got ripped jeans on. They're probably fashionable in Australia. God, the look, the look, the look! STFU. If you don't like me, don't look at me. Personally, I'd rather have gum on my shoes than John James in my house. 'At the end of the day.. I don't really care. She's ugly.' Classic schoolboy bullying tactics. Why does John James fancy Corin? He must be used to those leathery faces because of all the sunshine down under, mate. She looks like the scrapings off of David Dickinson's vanity table.
LAMINATOR. Begone. John James gave him a look like he was a piece of shit. Oh, he is.
Eww, Rachael being so vile to Ben. Ben is worth 75 of her. It's sad seeing Mario pawing at Ben and Ben pawing at Rachael. Mcdaddy swerve-on! Ben just pretended not to notice the implications of that conversation. Saved by the bogey.
Sunshine looks kinda cute today. Her lipstick is good. I think I'm in love with Ben a bit. He's got a very strange face but he's just so dignified. Marylebone indeed.
Racheal (sorry, FIANCEE) DOES actually have that look on her face all the time, like she's above it all. But even so. You'd have thought she'd murdered Stefan Dennis and hung him off the Sydney Harbour bridge the way John James is going on.
Why don't they ever show Steve or Nathan?! It's rubbish. I probably don't like them, but I'd like some more evidence to go on.
Oh god, not eating tasks. BB is meant to be the trendsetter of reality shows; not leeching off stale I'm a Celebrity ideas.
Josie is kind of cool, I think she's slowly turning into a class act. She never gets involved in the bitching. I think she's cute, too. It's not her fault she's pear-shaped. Her being sick in that bucket was funny (especially after I just called her classy).
Fiancee; you've got zero chance of changing John's opinion of you. Plus, why fancy someone just because they are good looking? His personality is loathsome.
WHAT ABOUT THE LOOK ON YOUR FACE JOHN JAMES YOU REPETITIVE STRAIN INJURY OF A MAN?
You should be glad he leaves the room when you walk in, Rachael. He's a nasty, poisonous bastard. I'd go up to him and tell him to go fuck himself.
That sucks when you're slagging someone off who's in the same room. We've all done it.
Shabby in Nuts with her tits out! Let's guess the headline. 'Not too Shabby?' Lordy. How DARE John James get angry about that, it's none of his fucking business. He is unnerving, he should be on a warning. He puts me on edge.
Good on Corin for speaking out. Don't fucking apologise to him. Shabby: 'I hope someone's speaking out';- why don't you go and fucking speak out? It could save your contrived little arse.
It's a bit rich John James telling people how to make money when he's living off a fucking inheritance. It's none of his business what reason people are in there for, what they do to make money, what they do with their own bodies. Have you ever seen John James have a go at a man in the house? Noooooo! Just the women! Woman-hating misogynistic cunt. Why is he so angry at everything? Did he get his ickle heart broken once? Boo hoo! Tosser. He doesn't want a blowjob in case it degrades you, he'd prefer you slit your wrists to get away from his instead.
Come on Nathan! Get your one line in: 'you've got feelings and stuff'. Brilliant.
Uh oh! Ben- all boys together! The fumble cats. Washer women indeed! Don't back someone up just because he's got a penis. OMG sexism united. And lesbianist too. Feminism is not a dirty word! They were just standing up for their friends. He called Shabby volatile- what does he think John James is? Timid? Mario trying to turn Ben gay at the end of that conversation was funny; it just might work after several weeks. I still love Ben, only slightly less than I used to.
John James: 'guys are different, they just don't bitch.' ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS?! *speechless*
There's so many people in the wrong here, I barely know where to start. Evict them ALL!
Wednesday, 16 June 2010
Big Brother 11: Hickory Dickory Cock
Nominations announced. Shabby, dear, it's not all about you. If you can't be bothered to save yourself; there's the door.
Ooh, who will be saved? Who will go on the block instead? There's only one way to find out.
CHEESE task. Is the prize a date with Alex James? Or a sculpture of Alex James, made of cheese. Either would be fab. Bored of this task now. Let's have some action.
Dave is off the block. Great, some more homophobic banter to come. Ooh, he has to pick the person to go up. How to make friends and influence people. GOVAN GOVAN GOVAN! Do it, you fucking coward.
Ooh, he picked Rachael! Harsh. What a wasted opportunity. He should have picked Govan. He'd have been a hero. I don't think he dared. Women hate. Vagina hate. You could have said no if you wanted to. You could have walked away... couldn't you. He should have put Steve up. As they say on BB USA; you got a target on your back now.
I know why Shabby's carping about the noms, because she knows she will go over Fiancee. I want the bitch clique to get picked off one by one. Their late night baths are boring. More Ben and Mario, please.
Govan, you survived that by the skin of your teeth! You could at least be gracious, you little troll.
Urgh, Shabby is such a prat. Ben does have a knack for insulting people but they definitely deserve it. Shabby's having a tantrum! That's decided. I'm going to vote her out. I'm done with her bullshit.
OMG did Dave just claim he cured someone's cancer? Crikey.
Ben, stop apologising to that dickhead. 'I'm often accused of being a ham'. Hehe.
Dave's punishment wasn't exactly major, was it? Favouritism. He read that speech in a very sombre tone.
I noticed Fiancee pulls the exact same confused face as John James. that must be why he likes/hates her so much. I think the problem with her is that in real life people are obviously crawling up her arse 24/7, yet in that house no one respects her. (Ah, she just admitted what I just said two seconds later!) I don't like her little girl act either; I find it very cloying.
John James's attitude STINKS. The way he acts and the games he plays is the kind of stuff you think when you're 15. He's not exactly the Pick Up Artist. He goes on and on and on and on. He talks so much about how he knows himself; he doesn't know shit.
Corin acts like her sun-damaged skin is a shock to her. She must have sat on those sunbeds.
OMG what is up John James's arse. He has got ISHHUUUES. Someone must have given him a dirty look at a sensitive time in his life and it's left a mental scar. It's not that he doesn't like you, Rachael, it's just that he fucking hates you/ wants to fuck you.
Some people just naturally look snooty half the time. I've known loads of people with that habit. FACE POLICE. Don't tell him you fancy him. He's an idiot. Her apologising to him made me cringe. He's rude, aggressive, ignorant.
Oh, and you've got a wedgie.
Ooh, who will be saved? Who will go on the block instead? There's only one way to find out.
CHEESE task. Is the prize a date with Alex James? Or a sculpture of Alex James, made of cheese. Either would be fab. Bored of this task now. Let's have some action.
Dave is off the block. Great, some more homophobic banter to come. Ooh, he has to pick the person to go up. How to make friends and influence people. GOVAN GOVAN GOVAN! Do it, you fucking coward.
Ooh, he picked Rachael! Harsh. What a wasted opportunity. He should have picked Govan. He'd have been a hero. I don't think he dared. Women hate. Vagina hate. You could have said no if you wanted to. You could have walked away... couldn't you. He should have put Steve up. As they say on BB USA; you got a target on your back now.
I know why Shabby's carping about the noms, because she knows she will go over Fiancee. I want the bitch clique to get picked off one by one. Their late night baths are boring. More Ben and Mario, please.
Govan, you survived that by the skin of your teeth! You could at least be gracious, you little troll.
Urgh, Shabby is such a prat. Ben does have a knack for insulting people but they definitely deserve it. Shabby's having a tantrum! That's decided. I'm going to vote her out. I'm done with her bullshit.
OMG did Dave just claim he cured someone's cancer? Crikey.
Ben, stop apologising to that dickhead. 'I'm often accused of being a ham'. Hehe.
Dave's punishment wasn't exactly major, was it? Favouritism. He read that speech in a very sombre tone.
I noticed Fiancee pulls the exact same confused face as John James. that must be why he likes/hates her so much. I think the problem with her is that in real life people are obviously crawling up her arse 24/7, yet in that house no one respects her. (Ah, she just admitted what I just said two seconds later!) I don't like her little girl act either; I find it very cloying.
John James's attitude STINKS. The way he acts and the games he plays is the kind of stuff you think when you're 15. He's not exactly the Pick Up Artist. He goes on and on and on and on. He talks so much about how he knows himself; he doesn't know shit.
Corin acts like her sun-damaged skin is a shock to her. She must have sat on those sunbeds.
OMG what is up John James's arse. He has got ISHHUUUES. Someone must have given him a dirty look at a sensitive time in his life and it's left a mental scar. It's not that he doesn't like you, Rachael, it's just that he fucking hates you/ wants to fuck you.
Some people just naturally look snooty half the time. I've known loads of people with that habit. FACE POLICE. Don't tell him you fancy him. He's an idiot. Her apologising to him made me cringe. He's rude, aggressive, ignorant.
Oh, and you've got a wedgie.
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