Oh God. It's like Groundhog Day in that house. It's all jealousy, possessiveness, creepiness and threats to leave. There's not even any romance. Not really.
Did Keever just say she needs to do a nervous shit? Goodness me. Is she yacking? Oh dear. I cant work out of she's really embarrassed or just faking it.
Is that really STEVE PASSING JUDGEMENT on people's conduct in that house? That is really rich.
I get the impression Keever AND Josie are both loving this. Much more than us viewers anyway. I wish we had someone to really champion this year. I feel like I can't be doing with any of 'em.
This mic switching off thing is bullshit. Can't they get someone to lipread it? Come on, for fuck's sake. It's just the same old shit anyway. John James brain-cam; nope, nothing going on in there, no matter how close you get.
I don't care what John James says; he loves it too. He is lapping it up.
Rachel imaging Ben on a grand piano! LOL! I'm not sure he fancies her, but he might get desperate enough in there. I reckon he'd get off with her just to be polite.
I really like Keever's hair right now. I want to look like a boy in an 80s band, too.
Mario's t-shirt is nice with the butterflies on.
Oh, Josie. Why SHOULDN'T John James like you? You're both totally psycho. Sounds like a match made in heaven. You'll never get a bloke with that attitude. Actually, you're worth a lot more than him, nice teeth or not.
Ah. Keeley's backing off now Steve's been sniffing her pillow! But she was in the diary room with him going 'we're Posh and Becks'. Keeley's been out with a footballer... how tedious. Is Steve going to nominate Keeley tomorrow? Bet he does. Yeah, that's fool the wife.
Food fight... always ends in a ruck. I love the fact everyone is in party dresses and Josie is in a rank old man's dressing gown. John James's dancing was funny.
Keever looks hot tonight. Josie must be seething. Love Ben and Rachel's paralytic cuddling.
Josie is not whiter than white to be calling Keever cruel. I've heard Josie slag off most people in that house, and she was pretty cruel to John James when he was threatening to leave.
Dur, you're not allowed to say you want to be nominated! Josie should stop slagging Keever, it's just driving her into John James's arms. Keever is getting off on it. Keever is a man/ woman eater. She takes no prisoners. I'd be scared of her around MY boyfriend!
Showing posts with label ife. Show all posts
Showing posts with label ife. Show all posts
Monday, 19 July 2010
Sunday, 18 July 2010
Big Brother 11: The ocean of hypocrisy
First blog I missed last night! Sowwee. I was in not fit state. I thought John James was on fire last night; he stuck it to absolutely everyone. I think he definitely does fancy Josie; his face lit up when that parrot said Josie fancied him. Why didn't they make the parrot repeat when Steve said about Keeley being poison? I didn't like Keeley having a pop at John James either, he's providing more entertainment than her and her creepy showmance.
DAVE IS A HYPOCRITE! He was laughing his head off when Mario stripped (again) and got his gigantic balls out (allegedly, we've still not seen them). SOMEONE CALL HIM OUT! I hate him so much. Keever should have sent him packing last week. So much for love for everyone. Everyone except women.
Josie Lee Collins is being an absolute arsehole. YOU ARE NOT GOING OUT WITH JOHN JAMES! He is NOT YOUR PROPERTY. I like the fact Keever is putting the cat amongst the pigeons. I'm tired of the bullshit; get it on or fuck off. It's tiresome.
Keever: 'let's get our tits out tonight!' Have you noticed how since Keeley entered the house, Steve has started wearing his glass eye. Just saying.
Josie is starting to do a Michelle Bass. She really needs to reign herself in before she goes gaga. She is making an absolute tool of herself.
Josie, I hope Keever pisses in your ocean, you bitter old shrew. Why not try getting off with John James rather than arguing with him every day? I have mainly been on her side up to now, but she has lost it today. She has lost all sense of perspective.
What is Steve on about oceans, too? I think there's been an oil slick in that ocean. I'm sure his wife will be delighted to know he feels jealous over someone he called poison and who's been in the house about ten minutes.
Andrew was brave to stand up to John James about the hat issue. Josie is pushing Keever and John closer together with her loopy behaviour.
Why is Steve crying? Is it because he's pissing his marriage up the wall? STOP DOING IT THEN.
Aw, Ben is so cute. I wish he could win it. He might not be a 'team player' but he's actually much more decent than all of them put together. He gets a really hard time. Shirley Bassey though? Just come out of that closet, Ben.
I had to fast forward Corin's singing but I think Ben's face said it all. Did they really just spend three minutes on that? Misjudged.
OMG did Rachel just say she was attracted to Ben?! Ha, and then Mario flounced off! That house is so full of creepiness and jealousy at the moment that it could combust at any minute. I'd love to see Ben and Rachel get it on, it would be hilarious.
John James is lying, he DOES fancy Josie now, he just doesn't want to admit it. Drop the brother and sister thing. I don't go on like that with my brother. It would be SICK. Sick!
DAVE IS A HYPOCRITE! He was laughing his head off when Mario stripped (again) and got his gigantic balls out (allegedly, we've still not seen them). SOMEONE CALL HIM OUT! I hate him so much. Keever should have sent him packing last week. So much for love for everyone. Everyone except women.
Josie Lee Collins is being an absolute arsehole. YOU ARE NOT GOING OUT WITH JOHN JAMES! He is NOT YOUR PROPERTY. I like the fact Keever is putting the cat amongst the pigeons. I'm tired of the bullshit; get it on or fuck off. It's tiresome.
Keever: 'let's get our tits out tonight!' Have you noticed how since Keeley entered the house, Steve has started wearing his glass eye. Just saying.
Josie is starting to do a Michelle Bass. She really needs to reign herself in before she goes gaga. She is making an absolute tool of herself.
Josie, I hope Keever pisses in your ocean, you bitter old shrew. Why not try getting off with John James rather than arguing with him every day? I have mainly been on her side up to now, but she has lost it today. She has lost all sense of perspective.
What is Steve on about oceans, too? I think there's been an oil slick in that ocean. I'm sure his wife will be delighted to know he feels jealous over someone he called poison and who's been in the house about ten minutes.
Andrew was brave to stand up to John James about the hat issue. Josie is pushing Keever and John closer together with her loopy behaviour.
Why is Steve crying? Is it because he's pissing his marriage up the wall? STOP DOING IT THEN.
Aw, Ben is so cute. I wish he could win it. He might not be a 'team player' but he's actually much more decent than all of them put together. He gets a really hard time. Shirley Bassey though? Just come out of that closet, Ben.
I had to fast forward Corin's singing but I think Ben's face said it all. Did they really just spend three minutes on that? Misjudged.
OMG did Rachel just say she was attracted to Ben?! Ha, and then Mario flounced off! That house is so full of creepiness and jealousy at the moment that it could combust at any minute. I'd love to see Ben and Rachel get it on, it would be hilarious.
John James is lying, he DOES fancy Josie now, he just doesn't want to admit it. Drop the brother and sister thing. I don't go on like that with my brother. It would be SICK. Sick!
Friday, 16 July 2010
Big Brother 11: It should have been me!
Bit drunk tonight so blog results may vary. Also have friends round so they have a responsibility to help!
Is this cougar thing still ongoing? WHY IS DAVE STILL IN THERE? My friends are giving me NOTHING!
I wish I could fly... right up to the sky, but I can't (you can) I can't.
These highlights are shit.. it's not my fault.. it's this superheroes shit. I never liked The Incredibles either. Or the Dark Knight. But these special effects are better than Twilight.
Shopping list! Is this a highlight? Keeley looks sour. She must need some moisturiser or something. Beef cubes! Yum yum.
I like Josie's excessive use of the word 'cunt'. Keever seems like she's a third wheel in the Josie/John James saga. It's like Twilight, but uglier. That's my second mention of Twilight.
Andrew and Keeley taking the mick out of Corin! Hehe. Surely Ife's gonna go though? Right?
Andrew telling John James to back off was funny!
2nd show. I don't think this is going to get any better, I'm afraid. Worse, if anything.
I never knew Mario was so into designer clothes; he looks like he's dressed straight outta Primark. That parrot thing looks good.
Psychologeeeeeee! Look at Judi James's teeth, dude. Give her Polo.
Bye Ife. I'm not sorry. See ya later. Keever looks nice in her gold vest.
I don't like her 'straight-outta-Holloway' outfit.
Ahh they're showing the person their best bits now! The producers DO read my blog.
I don't like Ife's blue eyeshadow. Is she blubbing? See, showing them the best bits is good. She looks a bit boss-eyed. I think it's the eyelashes.
Do you think they've cut the end section where people call in? I hope so.
I'm glad she came out bald. I don't like her wigs.
Haha, I like this caller sticking it to Ife. She is a dullard.
Treedom! Josie's hair looks nice. No one in invested in getting Ben's suitcase back! Fuck him. I want a Ben wig. John James looks good in it. Ben: 'you all look very nice'. I like it when he puts mascara on! Ben FTW.
Apologies for this blog, I haven't just let you down, I've let my country down.
Is this cougar thing still ongoing? WHY IS DAVE STILL IN THERE? My friends are giving me NOTHING!
I wish I could fly... right up to the sky, but I can't (you can) I can't.
These highlights are shit.. it's not my fault.. it's this superheroes shit. I never liked The Incredibles either. Or the Dark Knight. But these special effects are better than Twilight.
Shopping list! Is this a highlight? Keeley looks sour. She must need some moisturiser or something. Beef cubes! Yum yum.
I like Josie's excessive use of the word 'cunt'. Keever seems like she's a third wheel in the Josie/John James saga. It's like Twilight, but uglier. That's my second mention of Twilight.
Andrew and Keeley taking the mick out of Corin! Hehe. Surely Ife's gonna go though? Right?
Andrew telling John James to back off was funny!
2nd show. I don't think this is going to get any better, I'm afraid. Worse, if anything.
I never knew Mario was so into designer clothes; he looks like he's dressed straight outta Primark. That parrot thing looks good.
Psychologeeeeeee! Look at Judi James's teeth, dude. Give her Polo.
Bye Ife. I'm not sorry. See ya later. Keever looks nice in her gold vest.
I don't like her 'straight-outta-Holloway' outfit.
Ahh they're showing the person their best bits now! The producers DO read my blog.
I don't like Ife's blue eyeshadow. Is she blubbing? See, showing them the best bits is good. She looks a bit boss-eyed. I think it's the eyelashes.
Do you think they've cut the end section where people call in? I hope so.
I'm glad she came out bald. I don't like her wigs.
Haha, I like this caller sticking it to Ife. She is a dullard.
Treedom! Josie's hair looks nice. No one in invested in getting Ben's suitcase back! Fuck him. I want a Ben wig. John James looks good in it. Ben: 'you all look very nice'. I like it when he puts mascara on! Ben FTW.
Apologies for this blog, I haven't just let you down, I've let my country down.
Thursday, 15 July 2010
Big Brother 11: I can't bear Bisto
Sorry I'm late, I went to writing group tonight, and now I'm using those skills right here. Aren't you lucky? Corin's waist is TINY! None of them know what cougar is a euphemism for. I don't think Josie is much bigger than a 14, she's just pear-shaped. Dave is idiotic to say that to her. I don't think he said it with malice but he should know better.
Keever, why DIDN'T you put Dave up? Epic fail.
Who is the cougar? Davina, I reckon.
Corin's outfit makes me ashamed to be female. Superhero? Super sexist, more like. This task is perverse. I liked her stopping to put lipstick on. 'I don't give a shit if my eyebrows wipe off' as she snogs an ice-sculpture's waist.
Did Josie just say 'what's the matter with you, cunts?' I certainly hope so. They shouldn't put this dangerous shit into Josie's head about John James fancying her. It can only end in tears.
Since when did Corin like Ben?! I feel like I've missed something.
Love the fact Ben gets out first. He is so camp in those tiger pants.
Keeley HAS got a good arse. Wow. Four foot eleven! That's smaller than me. Loved Josie's comment of 'I wish she'd bugger off'. Funny! I'd like to drive that little blue car.
Mario: 'I'd better get back to my hos!' He needs to jerk off, for real. He's getting out of control. He'll be straight within the week.
Ife is such a shit stirrer. She is the one who pushed Shabby into telling Keever, and started that shit snowball. She's like Cilla Black gone wrong.
Alloy vera! That's what Desperate Dan uses for face cream.
Oh god, this whole Josie thing makes me feel terrified. She's going to get so hurt. The second she confesses she fancies him, he holds all the cards, and she loses her appeal. It's going to end up in a bloodbath.
Rachel looks quite good in that purple wig.
Urgh, that food looks like vomit.
As predicted, Ife sticks her claw in. Oh God, now Keever's going to tell him. John James isn't saying no! His crab eyes are on overtime.
Look at John James's bling! DOES he fancy her? Maybe it's one of those situations where he doesn't want to admit it because he's embarrassed to admit it in front of his friends. He could easily have shut that conversation down, but he prolonged it! Curiouser and curiouser...
Keever, why DIDN'T you put Dave up? Epic fail.
Who is the cougar? Davina, I reckon.
Corin's outfit makes me ashamed to be female. Superhero? Super sexist, more like. This task is perverse. I liked her stopping to put lipstick on. 'I don't give a shit if my eyebrows wipe off' as she snogs an ice-sculpture's waist.
Did Josie just say 'what's the matter with you, cunts?' I certainly hope so. They shouldn't put this dangerous shit into Josie's head about John James fancying her. It can only end in tears.
Since when did Corin like Ben?! I feel like I've missed something.
Love the fact Ben gets out first. He is so camp in those tiger pants.
Keeley HAS got a good arse. Wow. Four foot eleven! That's smaller than me. Loved Josie's comment of 'I wish she'd bugger off'. Funny! I'd like to drive that little blue car.
Mario: 'I'd better get back to my hos!' He needs to jerk off, for real. He's getting out of control. He'll be straight within the week.
Ife is such a shit stirrer. She is the one who pushed Shabby into telling Keever, and started that shit snowball. She's like Cilla Black gone wrong.
Alloy vera! That's what Desperate Dan uses for face cream.
Oh god, this whole Josie thing makes me feel terrified. She's going to get so hurt. The second she confesses she fancies him, he holds all the cards, and she loses her appeal. It's going to end up in a bloodbath.
Rachel looks quite good in that purple wig.
Urgh, that food looks like vomit.
As predicted, Ife sticks her claw in. Oh God, now Keever's going to tell him. John James isn't saying no! His crab eyes are on overtime.
Look at John James's bling! DOES he fancy her? Maybe it's one of those situations where he doesn't want to admit it because he's embarrassed to admit it in front of his friends. He could easily have shut that conversation down, but he prolonged it! Curiouser and curiouser...
Wednesday, 14 July 2010
Big Brother 11: Miffy Ife
That's weird they started the show with night time stuff. Steve is just showing off in front of his new girlfriend.
Ben is NOT a morning person. I don't like Dave and Keever's new-found friendship, it's sinister.
If Keeley is pocket poison, then Steve is a rat lapping that shit up.
Ife is not going to participate in the save and replace! Good. We can vote her out this week then.
Ben needs his beauty sleep! I reckon he needs at least ten hours.
What the FUCK is going on with Steve and Keeley? If I was his wife, I'd be worried. I feel like we've missed something. My boyfriend thinks they know each other. I'm glad she's brought out that side of him as he was doing less than fuck all before.
What's Corin come as; Michael Jackson? My boyfriend said she looks like she's decaying. I like Keever's hair today, she looks like a boy dressed up for a job interview. She's a feisty one!
I hope Keever saves herself! Shoot Ife! Shoot her dead. Or in the eye. Yay, she won! Love it.
Mario's up, so Ife's a goner. Can't believe Keever didn't put Dave up. That was a golden opportunity to get him out.
Ife must know she's fucked now. Mario's alright about it! He's all good. Honest. If she wanted to put up someone who was definitely safe, why didn't she choose Steve? Ah, Ife just said the exact same thing.
I like seeing the Nathan/ Ife/ Corin trilogy crumbling. It could EASILY have gone the other way. This show would be a disaster without Ben.
What is John James on about; I've never even seen him talk to Corin!
Mario is so desperate now I think he'd get off with Andrew given the chance. Aw, bless Andrew's never kissed a girl.
Mario you are not Big Brother! Stop setting secret missions. He is getting off on this. It's untoward.
You could just do anything in that house and pretend it's a secret task, just call everyone cunts and blame Big Brother.
John James not happy about Josie and Keever threatening to kiss! Who'd have thought it?
What is John James problem with Ben right now? He's mega grumpy.
Well, it's confirmed. Steve is a perv. So is my boyfriend who said 'don't you think Ben had a big packet?' !!!
Rachel looks creeped out. Steve is protesting too much! So are him and Keeley going to get off with each other or what? Blergh!
Ben is NOT a morning person. I don't like Dave and Keever's new-found friendship, it's sinister.
If Keeley is pocket poison, then Steve is a rat lapping that shit up.
Ife is not going to participate in the save and replace! Good. We can vote her out this week then.
Ben needs his beauty sleep! I reckon he needs at least ten hours.
What the FUCK is going on with Steve and Keeley? If I was his wife, I'd be worried. I feel like we've missed something. My boyfriend thinks they know each other. I'm glad she's brought out that side of him as he was doing less than fuck all before.
What's Corin come as; Michael Jackson? My boyfriend said she looks like she's decaying. I like Keever's hair today, she looks like a boy dressed up for a job interview. She's a feisty one!
I hope Keever saves herself! Shoot Ife! Shoot her dead. Or in the eye. Yay, she won! Love it.
Mario's up, so Ife's a goner. Can't believe Keever didn't put Dave up. That was a golden opportunity to get him out.
Ife must know she's fucked now. Mario's alright about it! He's all good. Honest. If she wanted to put up someone who was definitely safe, why didn't she choose Steve? Ah, Ife just said the exact same thing.
I like seeing the Nathan/ Ife/ Corin trilogy crumbling. It could EASILY have gone the other way. This show would be a disaster without Ben.
What is John James on about; I've never even seen him talk to Corin!
Mario is so desperate now I think he'd get off with Andrew given the chance. Aw, bless Andrew's never kissed a girl.
Mario you are not Big Brother! Stop setting secret missions. He is getting off on this. It's untoward.
You could just do anything in that house and pretend it's a secret task, just call everyone cunts and blame Big Brother.
John James not happy about Josie and Keever threatening to kiss! Who'd have thought it?
What is John James problem with Ben right now? He's mega grumpy.
Well, it's confirmed. Steve is a perv. So is my boyfriend who said 'don't you think Ben had a big packet?' !!!
Rachel looks creeped out. Steve is protesting too much! So are him and Keeley going to get off with each other or what? Blergh!
Tuesday, 13 July 2010
Big Brother 11: Chemical Cloche
Why is Steve mauling that young woman? He was lying on her yesterday, too. She must be delighted.
That Come Dine with Me dude seems even more irritating than usual! This first fifteen minutes have been boring as fuck. Can someone knock up some Krabby Patties, in that kitchen. If Big Brother had a brain, they'd make them cook some crab (eyes optional) and make them all walk sideways for the day.
Ooh Steve is bearing his teeth a bit! He's going to squash that pocket rocket by cuddling her to death.
Nominations (thank god). I'm glad the new housemates can't nominate! Ben: nominating Ife for a lack of humour is spot on. And he's nominating the war hero! For not being a team player... by snoring! He's not doing it deliberately.
Yay another nomination for Ife. Ife does like the sound of her own boring voice. The more Irish Keever comes, the more I like her.
Ooh, Keever's gold glittery hoodie is nice. I like her when she's being all cool and bitchy. Corin saying Keever didn't think about her decision to put Nathan up; I wouldn't have thought it required much thought. Idiot monkey face who pushed Shabby into leaving; done deal.
Dave is scared of Ife! It's probably because she's black. And Corin for a side of her he's not seen yet. Uh? Surely Keever would be the obvious choice for him.
Oh, Ife. I think a good rim job might do you good, love. BTW, stop nominating Ben.
Can't believe everyone's nominating Ife, I thought she'd slip under the radar for weeks. I like the way voting is going right now. Getting Nathan our was instrumental in this.
I'm surprised Josie and John James didn't get more nominations. Mario lays the blame squarely at Josie's feet (because he fancies John James).
Keeley is bringing out a new side of Steve; Steve under pressure, being nudged off his perch a bit. It reminds me of Vinnie Jones a bit; the confident daddy getting his feathers ruffled. But he also seems to have a soft spot for her; it's odd (but at least he's doing something interesting at last).
If you've never seen Come Dine With Me, you must think this part is really weird. It's really rubbish, either way.
Mario is so pious lately, I can see why he's getting on with Ife right now. He's giving it the whole 'I'm 28...' bullshit too. Mario doesn't know himself, in my opinion, he seems lost to me. Poor Andrew. You will feel joy in the Big Brother house... somehow.
First Steve starts crab-eye gate, and now he says Keeley has 'toad-like feet'. I hate to say pot kettle black but pot kettle black. Then he slapped her on the arse! WTF. Gross. I guess this is what new housemates are for; bringing out things in the old housemates you didn't expect.
Mario is so creepy. It's a shame as he's sexy and quite lovely (if a little boring) but he could sexualise a rotting corpse. I know they've been in there a while, but crikey.
Steve is like a dirty old man all of a sudden. It's gross. Let's see if Keeley likes that banter when it's him slobbering all over her in the night.
I hate to say it but I missed all the crab talk tonight. Pleased with the nominations though. Vote Ife.
That Come Dine with Me dude seems even more irritating than usual! This first fifteen minutes have been boring as fuck. Can someone knock up some Krabby Patties, in that kitchen. If Big Brother had a brain, they'd make them cook some crab (eyes optional) and make them all walk sideways for the day.
Ooh Steve is bearing his teeth a bit! He's going to squash that pocket rocket by cuddling her to death.
Nominations (thank god). I'm glad the new housemates can't nominate! Ben: nominating Ife for a lack of humour is spot on. And he's nominating the war hero! For not being a team player... by snoring! He's not doing it deliberately.
Yay another nomination for Ife. Ife does like the sound of her own boring voice. The more Irish Keever comes, the more I like her.
Ooh, Keever's gold glittery hoodie is nice. I like her when she's being all cool and bitchy. Corin saying Keever didn't think about her decision to put Nathan up; I wouldn't have thought it required much thought. Idiot monkey face who pushed Shabby into leaving; done deal.
Dave is scared of Ife! It's probably because she's black. And Corin for a side of her he's not seen yet. Uh? Surely Keever would be the obvious choice for him.
Oh, Ife. I think a good rim job might do you good, love. BTW, stop nominating Ben.
Can't believe everyone's nominating Ife, I thought she'd slip under the radar for weeks. I like the way voting is going right now. Getting Nathan our was instrumental in this.
I'm surprised Josie and John James didn't get more nominations. Mario lays the blame squarely at Josie's feet (because he fancies John James).
Keeley is bringing out a new side of Steve; Steve under pressure, being nudged off his perch a bit. It reminds me of Vinnie Jones a bit; the confident daddy getting his feathers ruffled. But he also seems to have a soft spot for her; it's odd (but at least he's doing something interesting at last).
If you've never seen Come Dine With Me, you must think this part is really weird. It's really rubbish, either way.
Mario is so pious lately, I can see why he's getting on with Ife right now. He's giving it the whole 'I'm 28...' bullshit too. Mario doesn't know himself, in my opinion, he seems lost to me. Poor Andrew. You will feel joy in the Big Brother house... somehow.
First Steve starts crab-eye gate, and now he says Keeley has 'toad-like feet'. I hate to say pot kettle black but pot kettle black. Then he slapped her on the arse! WTF. Gross. I guess this is what new housemates are for; bringing out things in the old housemates you didn't expect.
Mario is so creepy. It's a shame as he's sexy and quite lovely (if a little boring) but he could sexualise a rotting corpse. I know they've been in there a while, but crikey.
Steve is like a dirty old man all of a sudden. It's gross. Let's see if Keeley likes that banter when it's him slobbering all over her in the night.
I hate to say it but I missed all the crab talk tonight. Pleased with the nominations though. Vote Ife.
Monday, 12 July 2010
Big Brother 11: Crabby Creek
Crab eyes! If I hear the words 'crab eyes' one more time I'm going to slice John James into crab sticks. Not that crab sticks have crab in them. What sort of insult is crab eyes anyway? It makes no sense. It's like something a five-year-old would say.
Aw, Andrew has a crush on Josie. Josie is the femme fatale in that house. Who'd have thought it? Andrew, they only like you because you're new, they're not actually going to get off with you.
Crab eyes count: 8
Josie is being HARD! I can't freeze people out like that, I just give up and go 'oh alright then' after ten minutes. I don't blame her though. It's hard because they're BOTH in the wrong in some ways. I know something; I don't want to hear about it all show.
Andrew shouldn't be able to talk about what the others look like on TV! I don't like it. The new housemates have unsettled her and now she's got the hump.
Oh Josie LEAVE IT OUT. You wouldn't let it lie. She's getting worse than John James for harping on about the same fucking thing. I wouldn't be surprised if she gets a few nominations after this, she's being an absolute tool.
John James bawling in the diary room! He's going to make her PAY for this shit. Do you know what, maybe he'll learn his lesson this time.
God gave Dave his virginity back. It's literally a miracle that more than one woman slept with him.
Josie is acting like Kevin the teenager. I can see why she's got her hood up. It's pathetic everyone intervening. I'd like to bang both their heads together.
I don't like hearing girls use the word pussy pejoratively, it makes me feel ashamed to be female.
John's packing up his old kit bag and checking the camera is watching. Just like when my boyfriend has a row with me and buggers off. Except he can't anymore. Cos he lives here! LOL.
Mario: 'you're not going are you?' as John James packs his bags. I like the way Mario uses everyone's vulnerability as an excuse for a quick perv. Bright Eyes wrote a song about this very conversation that said: 'Always so eager to pack my bags... when I really want to stay.' John is crying because he's lost his power over Josie. I like seeing a grown man cry. It's sexy.
Never has a truer word been spoken than Ben saying, 'John James can give it out but can't take it.'
John James manipulating Josie from the diary room! And she KNOWS it!
Josie is dealing with this situation SO badly. You can't laugh at John James, he will stab you in your sleep. Or pincer you.
Why can't she just back down and give him a fucking cuddle?
Big Brother is manipulating this situation quite well, making them have a giggle in the diary room. It's like they are the mummy tricking them into liking each other again.
Oh they're arguing again. Josie doesn't seem bothered if he goes. I reckon she'll nominate him tomorrow. I'd like to see a John James/ Josie head-to-head. I reckon old crab eyes would have it. Josie is showing a very unpleasant side to her personality. And the thing that tipped her over the edge was that chin comment. Girls do not like having their chins commented on! Believe me, I know.
NB to John James: a really good way to make people call you crab eyes for the rest of your life is to throw a tantrum about it that lasts 48 hours. I'm making my crab eyes banner as we speak.
Aw, Andrew has a crush on Josie. Josie is the femme fatale in that house. Who'd have thought it? Andrew, they only like you because you're new, they're not actually going to get off with you.
Crab eyes count: 8
Josie is being HARD! I can't freeze people out like that, I just give up and go 'oh alright then' after ten minutes. I don't blame her though. It's hard because they're BOTH in the wrong in some ways. I know something; I don't want to hear about it all show.
Andrew shouldn't be able to talk about what the others look like on TV! I don't like it. The new housemates have unsettled her and now she's got the hump.
Oh Josie LEAVE IT OUT. You wouldn't let it lie. She's getting worse than John James for harping on about the same fucking thing. I wouldn't be surprised if she gets a few nominations after this, she's being an absolute tool.
John James bawling in the diary room! He's going to make her PAY for this shit. Do you know what, maybe he'll learn his lesson this time.
God gave Dave his virginity back. It's literally a miracle that more than one woman slept with him.
Josie is acting like Kevin the teenager. I can see why she's got her hood up. It's pathetic everyone intervening. I'd like to bang both their heads together.
I don't like hearing girls use the word pussy pejoratively, it makes me feel ashamed to be female.
John's packing up his old kit bag and checking the camera is watching. Just like when my boyfriend has a row with me and buggers off. Except he can't anymore. Cos he lives here! LOL.
Mario: 'you're not going are you?' as John James packs his bags. I like the way Mario uses everyone's vulnerability as an excuse for a quick perv. Bright Eyes wrote a song about this very conversation that said: 'Always so eager to pack my bags... when I really want to stay.' John is crying because he's lost his power over Josie. I like seeing a grown man cry. It's sexy.
Never has a truer word been spoken than Ben saying, 'John James can give it out but can't take it.'
John James manipulating Josie from the diary room! And she KNOWS it!
Josie is dealing with this situation SO badly. You can't laugh at John James, he will stab you in your sleep. Or pincer you.
Why can't she just back down and give him a fucking cuddle?
Big Brother is manipulating this situation quite well, making them have a giggle in the diary room. It's like they are the mummy tricking them into liking each other again.
Oh they're arguing again. Josie doesn't seem bothered if he goes. I reckon she'll nominate him tomorrow. I'd like to see a John James/ Josie head-to-head. I reckon old crab eyes would have it. Josie is showing a very unpleasant side to her personality. And the thing that tipped her over the edge was that chin comment. Girls do not like having their chins commented on! Believe me, I know.
NB to John James: a really good way to make people call you crab eyes for the rest of your life is to throw a tantrum about it that lasts 48 hours. I'm making my crab eyes banner as we speak.
Sunday, 11 July 2010
Big Brother 11: Without Josie, I'm nothing
Oy, skippy. I liked the Australia facts task John was set.
Did Keeley go in the house and announce she 'dated footballers'?! John James refused to look at her when he was talking to her. You can tell he can't stick her.
Keeley: 'I don't look my age'; even if she does say so herself. She does look like a hard-faced cow, though. Liked John under-cutting her even though he knew how old she was.
How long before they slag Keeley off for tidying up? I give it five minutes.
Andrew is house geek, bless him. I liked his self-effacing about Mario hoping he was gay.
Why DO people shave their eyebrows off? And draw them back on again? WHY?!
Josie has no reason to be jealous of Keeley.
LOL to the tree calling John James 'thick boy'. John: 'who do you think you are, Alf Stewart or something?' That whole exchange was quality.
I thought John was cheating on the task a bit. Him and the tree are like best buddies now.
I'm taking bets now on if John's friend has got dreadlocks. There's no point even moaning about the 'contact with the outside world' thing now- that shark has well and truly pole-vaulted.
Ben's Bristol accent leaves a lot to be desired. 'She's not hot but she's got a driving licence!' God, where would the house be without him!?
Andrew's pointing at Josie's arse... I'd like to say you can't miss it, but it's too cruel. Andrew: 'I'm a sloth in the bedroom.' Andrew gives it back a bit too, he's not just the weak link, I think he could have quite a sharp tongue once he's settled.
I wonder if John James's family told him to behave himself. They should have!
Keeley reminds me of someone you work with who really rubs you up the wrong way.
John? Cruising for an argument? NEVER! Poor Josie. She doesn't know whether he's coming or going with him; it'd be my worst nightmare to have a crush on someone like that. In fact, I've been in a relationship with someone like that, and you end up doubting your own sanity.
Josie is being DRAINED by John James. He's really hurt her I think by being so personal. This makes me feel so sad for some reason. It's like if the planets faced a different way; they could live happily ever after. But they're doomed.
Why is John James so insecure about his looks? He's very handsome. Imagine if he looked like Andrew! He's right though; we are just born like this. It's just a lottery.
I don't think John James fancies Josie, but he's very dependant on her. I think she has looked after him in some ways.
I'm glad Josie will stand up to him, but I'm not good at holding a grudge in an argument myself. I crack after ten minutes. John does needs putting in his place. I think that's why he likes her; she's the only one who dares say 'no' to him.
Corin: Buzz off.
Did Keeley go in the house and announce she 'dated footballers'?! John James refused to look at her when he was talking to her. You can tell he can't stick her.
Keeley: 'I don't look my age'; even if she does say so herself. She does look like a hard-faced cow, though. Liked John under-cutting her even though he knew how old she was.
How long before they slag Keeley off for tidying up? I give it five minutes.
Andrew is house geek, bless him. I liked his self-effacing about Mario hoping he was gay.
Why DO people shave their eyebrows off? And draw them back on again? WHY?!
Josie has no reason to be jealous of Keeley.
LOL to the tree calling John James 'thick boy'. John: 'who do you think you are, Alf Stewart or something?' That whole exchange was quality.
I thought John was cheating on the task a bit. Him and the tree are like best buddies now.
I'm taking bets now on if John's friend has got dreadlocks. There's no point even moaning about the 'contact with the outside world' thing now- that shark has well and truly pole-vaulted.
Ben's Bristol accent leaves a lot to be desired. 'She's not hot but she's got a driving licence!' God, where would the house be without him!?
Andrew's pointing at Josie's arse... I'd like to say you can't miss it, but it's too cruel. Andrew: 'I'm a sloth in the bedroom.' Andrew gives it back a bit too, he's not just the weak link, I think he could have quite a sharp tongue once he's settled.
I wonder if John James's family told him to behave himself. They should have!
Keeley reminds me of someone you work with who really rubs you up the wrong way.
John? Cruising for an argument? NEVER! Poor Josie. She doesn't know whether he's coming or going with him; it'd be my worst nightmare to have a crush on someone like that. In fact, I've been in a relationship with someone like that, and you end up doubting your own sanity.
Josie is being DRAINED by John James. He's really hurt her I think by being so personal. This makes me feel so sad for some reason. It's like if the planets faced a different way; they could live happily ever after. But they're doomed.
Why is John James so insecure about his looks? He's very handsome. Imagine if he looked like Andrew! He's right though; we are just born like this. It's just a lottery.
I don't think John James fancies Josie, but he's very dependant on her. I think she has looked after him in some ways.
I'm glad Josie will stand up to him, but I'm not good at holding a grudge in an argument myself. I crack after ten minutes. John does needs putting in his place. I think that's why he likes her; she's the only one who dares say 'no' to him.
Corin: Buzz off.
Saturday, 10 July 2010
Big Brother 11: Babylon Groo
Put your eyebrows on, Corin, and stop slagging Ben off. NB. She draws them on beautifully. I wish she'd come round and do my eyeliner. Ben wanted Nathan to stay because he cooks. He needs to recruit a new slave.
They've sent in the new house mates early this year, I think, which is quite telling about the calibre of the current crop, not that the new ones looked any better. My boyfriend is griping that they didn't put the housemates in isolation- that ship has long sailed.
This Mcdonalds advert makes me ANGRY. Wi-fi types just passing by- keep passing, you cunts.
LOVE John James digging Corin out. Corin having a go at John James because she thinks he's leaving tonight. Dickheads! Bolt-ons! Jog on! This is an intelligent argument. I'm expecting it to go 'you know you are, you said you are, but what am I?'
STOP SAYING DICKHEAD, Corin.
Corin is YOUNGER THAN ME! Look at her face. She looks like she's been fucking GRILLED! Shut up, idiot.
Urgh my boyfriend just said Corin's boobs are nice; they look like two rotting oranges that have been stuck on to her. WHY ARE THEY SHOWING SO MUCH OF HER IN THE DIARY ROOM? Enough already.
John James is the biggest wind-up merchant on the planet. He's got EXACTLY what he wants.
Let's look at Corin's miserable boiled face when Nathan goes! LOL. I missed him tripping up the stairs, class.
Team Corin and Ife are looking shaky now! Very, very shaky.
Keever looks quite sexy tonight. Did Keeley really just tell them to tidy up?! Nice.
Andrew told us nothing about himself. I know something. He's a geek.
Rachel is getting on my nerves already. Keever looks like someone just let off a stink bomb. John James looks anxious, too.
Keeley pretending she doesn't know what they do; she knows full well what they do.
I love the fact Keever and Dave have a cuddle because they have a new common enemy now: the new people! Brilliant. It's just a fear of the unknown.
Ben is so MEAN slagging off Andrew for saying he likes Terminator. I don't think I've ever seen a house round on the newbies so quickly. It was glorious! They are always begging for new people; now they hate them!
The newbies are going to be recruited by Corin and Ife into a powerhouse of desperation. Give them the bed that tips up in the morning!
Ben slagging off other people for having bad manners! That's rich. Imagine getting nicknamed Cruella 30 minutes after entering a house!
I don't like those new people slagging off Keever.
Fag-butt pilfering! It's as traditional on Big Brother as much as shopping list wars.
Keeley is really making an awful impression on everyone! Hate-figure time!
John James could be with us for a while, I think. Bonza.
They've sent in the new house mates early this year, I think, which is quite telling about the calibre of the current crop, not that the new ones looked any better. My boyfriend is griping that they didn't put the housemates in isolation- that ship has long sailed.
This Mcdonalds advert makes me ANGRY. Wi-fi types just passing by- keep passing, you cunts.
LOVE John James digging Corin out. Corin having a go at John James because she thinks he's leaving tonight. Dickheads! Bolt-ons! Jog on! This is an intelligent argument. I'm expecting it to go 'you know you are, you said you are, but what am I?'
STOP SAYING DICKHEAD, Corin.
Corin is YOUNGER THAN ME! Look at her face. She looks like she's been fucking GRILLED! Shut up, idiot.
Urgh my boyfriend just said Corin's boobs are nice; they look like two rotting oranges that have been stuck on to her. WHY ARE THEY SHOWING SO MUCH OF HER IN THE DIARY ROOM? Enough already.
John James is the biggest wind-up merchant on the planet. He's got EXACTLY what he wants.
Let's look at Corin's miserable boiled face when Nathan goes! LOL. I missed him tripping up the stairs, class.
Team Corin and Ife are looking shaky now! Very, very shaky.
Keever looks quite sexy tonight. Did Keeley really just tell them to tidy up?! Nice.
Andrew told us nothing about himself. I know something. He's a geek.
Rachel is getting on my nerves already. Keever looks like someone just let off a stink bomb. John James looks anxious, too.
Keeley pretending she doesn't know what they do; she knows full well what they do.
I love the fact Keever and Dave have a cuddle because they have a new common enemy now: the new people! Brilliant. It's just a fear of the unknown.
Ben is so MEAN slagging off Andrew for saying he likes Terminator. I don't think I've ever seen a house round on the newbies so quickly. It was glorious! They are always begging for new people; now they hate them!
The newbies are going to be recruited by Corin and Ife into a powerhouse of desperation. Give them the bed that tips up in the morning!
Ben slagging off other people for having bad manners! That's rich. Imagine getting nicknamed Cruella 30 minutes after entering a house!
I don't like those new people slagging off Keever.
Fag-butt pilfering! It's as traditional on Big Brother as much as shopping list wars.
Keeley is really making an awful impression on everyone! Hate-figure time!
John James could be with us for a while, I think. Bonza.
Friday, 9 July 2010
Big Brother 11: Davina of Devastation
TOOHOT!
Davina's going to be talking to Shabby? What's the point, she's old news. I know there's new housemates going in. I wasn't impressed with their photos.
Vote out the man-chimp!
Oh god, not more robot bullshit. Someone take the batteries out, please, Johnny five.
That was creepy when the robot gave Dave a message from his wife.
I liked Steve's joke about Ben being little Lord Fauntleroy. Hitler! Ben loves to defend the indefensible. I like that about him. It's nice to hear them talk politics in the Big Brother house. Oooh! Steve giving it to Ben was quite good. He's had his legs blown off, so he is entitled to have a strong view on war. Ben should appreciate that.
Dave vs Keever! Ding ding. The devil and the deep blue sea. Keever is just starting on him, to be fair. But I don't blame her.
Steve attacked that task with gusto. Nathan criticising the egg whisking- zzz. Read it and weep, battery man.
SO MANY ADVERTS. I wonder if Raoul Moat will be dead by the end of this blog?
John James's impression of Corin was pretty spot on.
Urgh Dave don't talk with your mouthful whilst talking about your wife's skintight catsuit.
Can't believe Ife let Nathan shave her head like that. I wouldn't trust him. It looked cool though.
Aw to Mario and John kissing. I bet John kisses girls like that too.
Part two. Moat's not dead but Gazza has gone to join him. It truly is a loopy old world. It's been a funny week for slebs, what with Ronaldo becoming a single parent, and the People's Princess catching malaria. Only the psychic octopus can save us now.
FUCK SHABBY! Why is she getting an interview of Davina? She should get George Lamb and be damned.
Why did they never show Keever proposing to her boyfriend? Too embarrassing! Saw her boyfriend on BBLB. He wasn't bad.
John James; putting his coat on was the lols. BYE NATHAN. Why are they cheering him? He was one of the most rubbish housemates ever, and that's saying something. they sent him out to Richard Ashcroft; enough said.
Nathan got 89% of the vote! Love it! Long live misogynistic psychopath John James!
Nathan's attitude is disgusting, he speaks to people like dirt but without a hint of a sense of humour. Not sorry to see the back of him. Even callers ringing up to slag him were boring.
New housemates! Keeley. Confident blonde, so no doubt John James will brow-beat the fuck out of her.
Andrew. Enjoys being articulated. He's not lost his virginity, let's be honest.
Rachel (the 2nd). Oh, God, a Liverpool accent. It always makes me think of Sporty Spice. is this really the best they had to offer?
Davina slagging off Keever's hair! I think Keever's hair is cool. Back off.
Mario will like the new housemates going in in a spaceship. Ben won't.
Ife needs to ditch that raggedy old wig fast.
It would have been better if they hadn't used that Bob Righter thing and just sent the spaceship in. The spaceship looked blue peter stylee. Still, they are spending a few quid this year.
Is Mario so desperate he would want THIS guy? ARGH they fucking KNOW THEM! Bullshit.
Sorry this blog sucked. I'm too sweaty to be funny. I just need to chisel myself from the sofa. Slurp!
Davina's going to be talking to Shabby? What's the point, she's old news. I know there's new housemates going in. I wasn't impressed with their photos.
Vote out the man-chimp!
Oh god, not more robot bullshit. Someone take the batteries out, please, Johnny five.
That was creepy when the robot gave Dave a message from his wife.
I liked Steve's joke about Ben being little Lord Fauntleroy. Hitler! Ben loves to defend the indefensible. I like that about him. It's nice to hear them talk politics in the Big Brother house. Oooh! Steve giving it to Ben was quite good. He's had his legs blown off, so he is entitled to have a strong view on war. Ben should appreciate that.
Dave vs Keever! Ding ding. The devil and the deep blue sea. Keever is just starting on him, to be fair. But I don't blame her.
Steve attacked that task with gusto. Nathan criticising the egg whisking- zzz. Read it and weep, battery man.
SO MANY ADVERTS. I wonder if Raoul Moat will be dead by the end of this blog?
John James's impression of Corin was pretty spot on.
Urgh Dave don't talk with your mouthful whilst talking about your wife's skintight catsuit.
Can't believe Ife let Nathan shave her head like that. I wouldn't trust him. It looked cool though.
Aw to Mario and John kissing. I bet John kisses girls like that too.
Part two. Moat's not dead but Gazza has gone to join him. It truly is a loopy old world. It's been a funny week for slebs, what with Ronaldo becoming a single parent, and the People's Princess catching malaria. Only the psychic octopus can save us now.
FUCK SHABBY! Why is she getting an interview of Davina? She should get George Lamb and be damned.
Why did they never show Keever proposing to her boyfriend? Too embarrassing! Saw her boyfriend on BBLB. He wasn't bad.
John James; putting his coat on was the lols. BYE NATHAN. Why are they cheering him? He was one of the most rubbish housemates ever, and that's saying something. they sent him out to Richard Ashcroft; enough said.
Nathan got 89% of the vote! Love it! Long live misogynistic psychopath John James!
Nathan's attitude is disgusting, he speaks to people like dirt but without a hint of a sense of humour. Not sorry to see the back of him. Even callers ringing up to slag him were boring.
New housemates! Keeley. Confident blonde, so no doubt John James will brow-beat the fuck out of her.
Andrew. Enjoys being articulated. He's not lost his virginity, let's be honest.
Rachel (the 2nd). Oh, God, a Liverpool accent. It always makes me think of Sporty Spice. is this really the best they had to offer?
Davina slagging off Keever's hair! I think Keever's hair is cool. Back off.
Mario will like the new housemates going in in a spaceship. Ben won't.
Ife needs to ditch that raggedy old wig fast.
It would have been better if they hadn't used that Bob Righter thing and just sent the spaceship in. The spaceship looked blue peter stylee. Still, they are spending a few quid this year.
Is Mario so desperate he would want THIS guy? ARGH they fucking KNOW THEM! Bullshit.
Sorry this blog sucked. I'm too sweaty to be funny. I just need to chisel myself from the sofa. Slurp!
Thursday, 8 July 2010
Big brother 11: Robot bores
I'm having to write this on my mobile phone because BT are cunts, so apologies for brevity/ errors.
Ooh big brother has gone all daft punk! Robot rock. Exterminate the housemates, please. That robot is super cool.
Dave sidestepped that gay/abortion issue quite deftly. I'm glad keever called him out on it.
Ben: 'i'm not selfish at all'. ! !!
Get over it Mario, you'd still fuck him in 2 seconds if he asked. I hate to say it but Ben is right about mario, he IS a bit boring. But I still like him.
This task has been balls so far. I wish I'd stuck with eastenders.
We've got this Brian-molko meds-era megaphone that has a robot switch on it. Big brother has basically got carried away with that.
I like keever sticking up for Ben. She's flourished since shabby's gone. Don't get me wrong, she's got a nasty streak but I kinda like it. The smoothie thing was funnyish.
Corin is getting the 'happy happy house' edit. I hope she gets kicked out the back door like that dullard did.
Dave is ben's bitch! Who else would volunteer for that shit?
I like it when Ben refuses to have a sense of humour about things like the bed and the robot.
That robot voice is getting on my tits. I feel like Stephen hawking has done a celebrity hijack.
Don't bring your opinion to dave, he don't wanna hear it! He might say something that gets him voted out. I knew keever fucked up by slagging corin in front of dave. That will come back and bite her.
Lol to Ben sticking it to steve for being a 'war hero'. No one is safe! I hope bb plays that over the loudspeaker, it would be priceless.
Why won't dave get into it with keever? Because he will unravel like the woolly little little lamb he is. If someone was questioning my beliefs I'd defend them to the death.
This blog was brought to you by my thumbs. Hope you liked it.
Ooh big brother has gone all daft punk! Robot rock. Exterminate the housemates, please. That robot is super cool.
Dave sidestepped that gay/abortion issue quite deftly. I'm glad keever called him out on it.
Ben: 'i'm not selfish at all'. ! !!
Get over it Mario, you'd still fuck him in 2 seconds if he asked. I hate to say it but Ben is right about mario, he IS a bit boring. But I still like him.
This task has been balls so far. I wish I'd stuck with eastenders.
We've got this Brian-molko meds-era megaphone that has a robot switch on it. Big brother has basically got carried away with that.
I like keever sticking up for Ben. She's flourished since shabby's gone. Don't get me wrong, she's got a nasty streak but I kinda like it. The smoothie thing was funnyish.
Corin is getting the 'happy happy house' edit. I hope she gets kicked out the back door like that dullard did.
Dave is ben's bitch! Who else would volunteer for that shit?
I like it when Ben refuses to have a sense of humour about things like the bed and the robot.
That robot voice is getting on my tits. I feel like Stephen hawking has done a celebrity hijack.
Don't bring your opinion to dave, he don't wanna hear it! He might say something that gets him voted out. I knew keever fucked up by slagging corin in front of dave. That will come back and bite her.
Lol to Ben sticking it to steve for being a 'war hero'. No one is safe! I hope bb plays that over the loudspeaker, it would be priceless.
Why won't dave get into it with keever? Because he will unravel like the woolly little little lamb he is. If someone was questioning my beliefs I'd defend them to the death.
This blog was brought to you by my thumbs. Hope you liked it.
Wednesday, 7 July 2010
Big Brother 11: Dead or alive, you're coming with Caoimhe
God Ife, even your backstory is dull as fuck.
Liked Steve's reaction to the robot: 'alright, big fella'.
If Steve is half-man, half-machine, and Nathan is half-man, half-monkey.
Ooh I like Mario's side parting and glasses look.
LOL to people gasping to John James being up! Of course he's going to be up. He looks worried.
That TV looks like a health and safety ishhhue. Was John James really not trying at the task? I can't work it out.
Is he being a marytr? Why?
BYE BYE NATHAN! That's how quickly the game spins. The Vinnie Jones act isn't going to save you now. I genuinely couldn't be happier. John James may have played a blinder there; he doesn't get the bad rap plus he doesn't like Nathan, yet Keever gets the blame for putting him up. Aw to Mario hugging him. Mario has got a good heart, even if he is basically boring as hell.
How weird that John James put himself on the block to save Keever. Is he that clever to work out it makes him
look good? He can't be... can he?
I can't wait to see Ife, Nathan and Corin's faces drop on Friday. Well, as Nathan says, everything happens
for a reason. Ta-ra!
I like Josie, John and Keever slagging off Corin, it's funny. ROUGH! Harsh.
Shoes for booze! Josie is so unsubtle. Why would you need more than one pair of shoes in the Big Brother house?
You might as well just wear slippers. Josie: 'I've just had an accident in my pants!'
That's one way to clear the room.
Why is Ife telling Keever what she said about her in the diary room?! Is she an idiot? John James is right though,
it's one person's opinion. the only way that would upset you is if it were true.
John James is being sexy again this week. I've almost forgotten he's a complete psycho.
Josie's been on good form today as well; I liked her ploy of telling John to go to the bathroom and start screaming because the robot moved. John James's attempt at it was pathetic!
Ben: 'it's in girl's nature to be bitchy!'. He can fucking talk!
Josie has got some serious comedy timing. I thought she was going to get her boobs out when she whipped those flip flops out.
Ooh that robot looks kind of cool. Robert cop!
Liked Steve's reaction to the robot: 'alright, big fella'.
If Steve is half-man, half-machine, and Nathan is half-man, half-monkey.
Ooh I like Mario's side parting and glasses look.
LOL to people gasping to John James being up! Of course he's going to be up. He looks worried.
That TV looks like a health and safety ishhhue. Was John James really not trying at the task? I can't work it out.
Is he being a marytr? Why?
BYE BYE NATHAN! That's how quickly the game spins. The Vinnie Jones act isn't going to save you now. I genuinely couldn't be happier. John James may have played a blinder there; he doesn't get the bad rap plus he doesn't like Nathan, yet Keever gets the blame for putting him up. Aw to Mario hugging him. Mario has got a good heart, even if he is basically boring as hell.
How weird that John James put himself on the block to save Keever. Is he that clever to work out it makes him
look good? He can't be... can he?
I can't wait to see Ife, Nathan and Corin's faces drop on Friday. Well, as Nathan says, everything happens
for a reason. Ta-ra!
I like Josie, John and Keever slagging off Corin, it's funny. ROUGH! Harsh.
Shoes for booze! Josie is so unsubtle. Why would you need more than one pair of shoes in the Big Brother house?
You might as well just wear slippers. Josie: 'I've just had an accident in my pants!'
That's one way to clear the room.
Why is Ife telling Keever what she said about her in the diary room?! Is she an idiot? John James is right though,
it's one person's opinion. the only way that would upset you is if it were true.
John James is being sexy again this week. I've almost forgotten he's a complete psycho.
Josie's been on good form today as well; I liked her ploy of telling John to go to the bathroom and start screaming because the robot moved. John James's attempt at it was pathetic!
Ben: 'it's in girl's nature to be bitchy!'. He can fucking talk!
Josie has got some serious comedy timing. I thought she was going to get her boobs out when she whipped those flip flops out.
Ooh that robot looks kind of cool. Robert cop!
Tuesday, 6 July 2010
Big Brother: Get your raincloud out of my face
My internet is still not on and this Belkin bullshit is hanging on by a thread. Grrs.
Why is Keever always in cahoots with Mario and Ben lately? I liked Ben comforting her and calling her sweetheart.
Furnishings update: they have the same chest of drawers as us in the BB house. They're quite good those drawers.
It doesn't reflect well on Keever that she didn't walk with Shabby.
Nathan calling Ben a shithead for no reason. Nice.
Shabby: 'I'm not unpopular in real life.' Yeah I bet people love it when they come home to their mansion and find her
and Emilia sitting round writing Levellers lyrics on the back of army jackets and playing a trumpet. I bet they roll out
the red carpet.
Adbreak: go on Barrowman, blow those plastic housewives sky high! Tonight's the night.
I'm glad Keever's staying if she's going to vote out Nathan this week.
Nathan was the straw that broke Shabby's back. Why is Nathan being so belligerent today? Shabby's not even giving it back to him! She's a broken woman.
I want to be a by-product of mischief. It sounds fun.
Aw it was sad the way it ended with Keever and Shabby. They didn't even get to say goodbye.
Keever looks quite sexy today. She's right, Nathan does bully Ben. It doesn't matter if Ben realises it or not, it's still the truth.
Bad atmosphere in the house tonight! I'm done with Corin now. She's an enabler with Nathan. I never saw much in her anyway. She's just got white noise between her ears.
Shabby left in a huff, and that's it. She should have hung on. Shame. Big Brother shouldn't have let her leave in that state.
Ife and Nathan's coupling is as cloying as it is teeth-gnashingly grating.
Nathan, happy go lucky? Happy go cunty more like. Everyone HAS to feel good, on Ife's orders (or else).
Shabby, any last words before you shuffle out of the diary room? I think I might have behaved a bit like Shabby in there (ie. been an idiot) which is why I'd never go in.
OMG are Ben and Dave that stupid to talk about nominations AGAIN! Dur.
I'd like Mario to give me a comforting stroke if I was feeling down. Is Keever really crying? Aw to Josie 'I've got your back'.
John James is getting the Hira edit tonight. Boo.
I just said 'oh my God, what is Josie wearing?' to my boyfriend and he replied, 'Is it Etam's Picasso range?' LOLZ. This is why I'm wrinkly. Because he makes me laugh too much.
How long after Shabby left do you think Keever felt like the weight had been lifted? I reckon about 15 minutes. Sold Shabby down the river almost immediately with her 'lesbian sidekick' comment. Quite sad to see.
Why has Corin got a medusa wig on tonight?
WTF nominations right at the end? I smell a rat. I'm glad Ben voted Ife. Time she got dug out.
I liked Keever's nominations. I'd love to see Nathan and Ife up.
WHY ARE YOU SHOUTING CORIN? Is it because you're a mong? Oh, yeah.
Ugh Dave is anti-choice as well as anti-gay. Knob-end.
Ife, please stick your remorse up your arse, you dullard.
I knew John James was going to noninate Ben. And it's not for anything to do with tasks; it's because he called you an idiot.
Josie frightened of Corin! That really is a thick-off.
Mario nominated Steve! Daring.
Nathan has only tried to 'boost morale'. It's not the fucking army, dude.
Interesting Steve said John James only picks on women! Very good that he noticed that.
Mario's eyebrow raise at Ben's comments on Shabby 'acting like a man' was inspired.
I like the Corin backlash! It's fun. I think I could warm to this Mario/John James/Josie/Keever alliance.
Are these nominations going to stand? I get the feeling they're going to cancel them.
Keever is bold to declare 'Shabby was the most real person in this house' to everyone at dinner. How to win friends!
Liked Ben impersonating John and saying he can have a fight in an empty room.
Keever is doing it for Shabby. BFFs forever. Right?
Why is Keever always in cahoots with Mario and Ben lately? I liked Ben comforting her and calling her sweetheart.
Furnishings update: they have the same chest of drawers as us in the BB house. They're quite good those drawers.
It doesn't reflect well on Keever that she didn't walk with Shabby.
Nathan calling Ben a shithead for no reason. Nice.
Shabby: 'I'm not unpopular in real life.' Yeah I bet people love it when they come home to their mansion and find her
and Emilia sitting round writing Levellers lyrics on the back of army jackets and playing a trumpet. I bet they roll out
the red carpet.
Adbreak: go on Barrowman, blow those plastic housewives sky high! Tonight's the night.
I'm glad Keever's staying if she's going to vote out Nathan this week.
Nathan was the straw that broke Shabby's back. Why is Nathan being so belligerent today? Shabby's not even giving it back to him! She's a broken woman.
I want to be a by-product of mischief. It sounds fun.
Aw it was sad the way it ended with Keever and Shabby. They didn't even get to say goodbye.
Keever looks quite sexy today. She's right, Nathan does bully Ben. It doesn't matter if Ben realises it or not, it's still the truth.
Bad atmosphere in the house tonight! I'm done with Corin now. She's an enabler with Nathan. I never saw much in her anyway. She's just got white noise between her ears.
Shabby left in a huff, and that's it. She should have hung on. Shame. Big Brother shouldn't have let her leave in that state.
Ife and Nathan's coupling is as cloying as it is teeth-gnashingly grating.
Nathan, happy go lucky? Happy go cunty more like. Everyone HAS to feel good, on Ife's orders (or else).
Shabby, any last words before you shuffle out of the diary room? I think I might have behaved a bit like Shabby in there (ie. been an idiot) which is why I'd never go in.
OMG are Ben and Dave that stupid to talk about nominations AGAIN! Dur.
I'd like Mario to give me a comforting stroke if I was feeling down. Is Keever really crying? Aw to Josie 'I've got your back'.
John James is getting the Hira edit tonight. Boo.
I just said 'oh my God, what is Josie wearing?' to my boyfriend and he replied, 'Is it Etam's Picasso range?' LOLZ. This is why I'm wrinkly. Because he makes me laugh too much.
How long after Shabby left do you think Keever felt like the weight had been lifted? I reckon about 15 minutes. Sold Shabby down the river almost immediately with her 'lesbian sidekick' comment. Quite sad to see.
Why has Corin got a medusa wig on tonight?
WTF nominations right at the end? I smell a rat. I'm glad Ben voted Ife. Time she got dug out.
I liked Keever's nominations. I'd love to see Nathan and Ife up.
WHY ARE YOU SHOUTING CORIN? Is it because you're a mong? Oh, yeah.
Ugh Dave is anti-choice as well as anti-gay. Knob-end.
Ife, please stick your remorse up your arse, you dullard.
I knew John James was going to noninate Ben. And it's not for anything to do with tasks; it's because he called you an idiot.
Josie frightened of Corin! That really is a thick-off.
Mario nominated Steve! Daring.
Nathan has only tried to 'boost morale'. It's not the fucking army, dude.
Interesting Steve said John James only picks on women! Very good that he noticed that.
Mario's eyebrow raise at Ben's comments on Shabby 'acting like a man' was inspired.
I like the Corin backlash! It's fun. I think I could warm to this Mario/John James/Josie/Keever alliance.
Are these nominations going to stand? I get the feeling they're going to cancel them.
Keever is bold to declare 'Shabby was the most real person in this house' to everyone at dinner. How to win friends!
Liked Ben impersonating John and saying he can have a fight in an empty room.
Keever is doing it for Shabby. BFFs forever. Right?
Monday, 5 July 2010
Big Brother 11: Matress Reloaded
Why is BB on at 8? Now I can’t watch Corrie or Enders! Badness. I have no internet or freeview at the mo so had to try and get my video to work! I didn’t like it. Old technology; you defeated me. New technology: you defeated me.
Is Big Brother even going to work without the swearing? My reality TV buddy JOTV texted me after work to say Shabby had gone walkies. She must have been missing Uncle Biffa. RIP Shabs. You made your mother proud.
So they’re going to buy Steve a new leg, as his current one is on loan. Some seemed keener on that idea than others, didn’t they, Dave. Leg gate! Who did Steve borrow the leg from? The legbrary? I know I wouldn't want to stump up for it! Hohohohohoho.
I liked Mario explaining history to Corin with the use of the ‘big hand’ and the ‘little hand’. Is he going to make sure she eats her dinner with the choo choo train? Mario thinks the Loch Ness Monster is '20 to 30 meters long'. Unconfirmed reports are coming in that Mario's winkie is 3 centimetres long.
Which cause does Ben want to give his imaginary winnings to? Probably restoring Windsor Castle. Or the Raef from The Apprentice benevolent fund. I don't think it's something he needs to worry about too much as he's going to be out this week anyway the way he's behaving.
Do you think we would have got to see the girls flash if it was after 9pm? Or would it have been hidden from us, just like Mario's dinkle? Conspiracy.
God, I hate Ife. She's a total div. Keever and Shabby are 100% tool, don't get me wrong, but the whole situation just stinks of teenage angst. Shabby and Keever being bitter because someone is having fun? No shit. It's a national cunt disco.
Bedgate! Ooh, Corin is getting angry. Back off, she's radioactive.
John James looked like he wanted to be in the bedroom rather than at the party with proud-to-be-a-moron Corin, Neanderthal Nathan, idiot Ife and Saint Steve. Who can blame him? (And this line-up, by the way, is what you've got to look forward to in the final three weeks, mark my words).
Ife's idea of a 'wicked time' and mine is something different. I think Ife thinks she's coming off as some sort of renegade who we're all sitting at home cheering on when actually we just think she's a whingey little turncoat dullard.
Ife STOP BEING SO SANCTIMONIOUS. Careful, Ife, your dignity is getting compromised. I wish Ife was in a fishbowl, being held under. But to be fair to her, she did say quite clearly 'I don't want to talk right now'. So why not just leave her be?
Keever's neck vein looked ready to pop.
Shabby and Keever looked genuinely depressed in the diary room. At least Shabby actually meant it about leaving this time. So what will Keever do when she's gone? Wage war on Ife? Make friends with Ife?
I felt a bit sad watching her go. I don't know why. Oh yeah I do. It's because as much of a dimlo as Shabby was, at least she had a personality. The rest of the house can barely scrape together one between them.
Is Big Brother even going to work without the swearing? My reality TV buddy JOTV texted me after work to say Shabby had gone walkies. She must have been missing Uncle Biffa. RIP Shabs. You made your mother proud.
So they’re going to buy Steve a new leg, as his current one is on loan. Some seemed keener on that idea than others, didn’t they, Dave. Leg gate! Who did Steve borrow the leg from? The legbrary? I know I wouldn't want to stump up for it! Hohohohohoho.
I liked Mario explaining history to Corin with the use of the ‘big hand’ and the ‘little hand’. Is he going to make sure she eats her dinner with the choo choo train? Mario thinks the Loch Ness Monster is '20 to 30 meters long'. Unconfirmed reports are coming in that Mario's winkie is 3 centimetres long.
Which cause does Ben want to give his imaginary winnings to? Probably restoring Windsor Castle. Or the Raef from The Apprentice benevolent fund. I don't think it's something he needs to worry about too much as he's going to be out this week anyway the way he's behaving.
Do you think we would have got to see the girls flash if it was after 9pm? Or would it have been hidden from us, just like Mario's dinkle? Conspiracy.
God, I hate Ife. She's a total div. Keever and Shabby are 100% tool, don't get me wrong, but the whole situation just stinks of teenage angst. Shabby and Keever being bitter because someone is having fun? No shit. It's a national cunt disco.
Bedgate! Ooh, Corin is getting angry. Back off, she's radioactive.
John James looked like he wanted to be in the bedroom rather than at the party with proud-to-be-a-moron Corin, Neanderthal Nathan, idiot Ife and Saint Steve. Who can blame him? (And this line-up, by the way, is what you've got to look forward to in the final three weeks, mark my words).
Ife's idea of a 'wicked time' and mine is something different. I think Ife thinks she's coming off as some sort of renegade who we're all sitting at home cheering on when actually we just think she's a whingey little turncoat dullard.
Ife STOP BEING SO SANCTIMONIOUS. Careful, Ife, your dignity is getting compromised. I wish Ife was in a fishbowl, being held under. But to be fair to her, she did say quite clearly 'I don't want to talk right now'. So why not just leave her be?
Keever's neck vein looked ready to pop.
Shabby and Keever looked genuinely depressed in the diary room. At least Shabby actually meant it about leaving this time. So what will Keever do when she's gone? Wage war on Ife? Make friends with Ife?
I felt a bit sad watching her go. I don't know why. Oh yeah I do. It's because as much of a dimlo as Shabby was, at least she had a personality. The rest of the house can barely scrape together one between them.
Sunday, 4 July 2010
Big Brother 11: Nathan Gnarly
Another day, another task, more contact with the outside world. I HATE these army tasks, they make me cringe.
Oh, Shabby, London doesn't love you back. I thought she was from Milton Keynes anyway? She isn't so proud of the concrete cows.
Ben giving it back to the army guy was quite funny. He did FIVE MINUTES, what more do they want? Haha. I'm glad he put Dave up! Dave's been let off the hook easy so far. He took that quite well, if anything.
Did Dave just go to have a wash in the pool? Urgh.
Shopping list bullshit! Not interested. Vote Nathan out and end his kitchen tyranny. See him give the shopping list up to Josie then stomp off like a complete twat. Dave just wants the men to sort it out. 'Take it outside, ladies'. Shopping is not that difficult.
Keever has been cleaning her teeth for the whole of the highlights. Shabby is SPOILING for a fight.
Oh, Ben. He's not a team player. But at least he's not an uncouth, grunting, rude, ugly, moronic, hairy man-pig like Nathan.
I hate these BBLB tasks! FORMAT FAIL.
Does Keever ever say anything pleasant about anyone? How can someone manage to be so dull and so conceited at the same time?
Look at them scavenging crisps! Hiding them away. RIP Sunshine.
Have you noticed how the majority of the smokers are complete arseholes? Just saying.
Oh Mario, give it a rest. Make up with Ben quick before nomination time. For all the long words he drops into sentences, his emotional intelligence is zero. That make up hug was awkward.
I like the silver sheets! We got silky sheets recently though and it didn't work out so well. Too slippy!
I ask again; why have we never got to see Mario running round naked?! I'm sure he thinks that was his finest hour and it hasn't even been shown.
Aw to Ben not getting his suitcase back. I want to see more of his clobber. I'm sick of all the Ben bashing.
Nathan doesn't like upper class people? NO SHIT. Classist prick. Nathan doesn't know any intelligent people, he probably thinks if you can answer the phone-in quiz on GMTV you're a member of fucking Mensa.
Why IS Nathan so aggressive? Do you think he was dropped on his head as a baby?
John James looks so handsome when he smiles. Shame he's such a numpty. Are him and Josie in love? I can't tell. It feels like it might all end in tears.
Anyway, blah-bluh-bleh, as Morrissey would say.
Oh, Shabby, London doesn't love you back. I thought she was from Milton Keynes anyway? She isn't so proud of the concrete cows.
Ben giving it back to the army guy was quite funny. He did FIVE MINUTES, what more do they want? Haha. I'm glad he put Dave up! Dave's been let off the hook easy so far. He took that quite well, if anything.
Did Dave just go to have a wash in the pool? Urgh.
Shopping list bullshit! Not interested. Vote Nathan out and end his kitchen tyranny. See him give the shopping list up to Josie then stomp off like a complete twat. Dave just wants the men to sort it out. 'Take it outside, ladies'. Shopping is not that difficult.
Keever has been cleaning her teeth for the whole of the highlights. Shabby is SPOILING for a fight.
Oh, Ben. He's not a team player. But at least he's not an uncouth, grunting, rude, ugly, moronic, hairy man-pig like Nathan.
I hate these BBLB tasks! FORMAT FAIL.
Does Keever ever say anything pleasant about anyone? How can someone manage to be so dull and so conceited at the same time?
Look at them scavenging crisps! Hiding them away. RIP Sunshine.
Have you noticed how the majority of the smokers are complete arseholes? Just saying.
Oh Mario, give it a rest. Make up with Ben quick before nomination time. For all the long words he drops into sentences, his emotional intelligence is zero. That make up hug was awkward.
I like the silver sheets! We got silky sheets recently though and it didn't work out so well. Too slippy!
I ask again; why have we never got to see Mario running round naked?! I'm sure he thinks that was his finest hour and it hasn't even been shown.
Aw to Ben not getting his suitcase back. I want to see more of his clobber. I'm sick of all the Ben bashing.
Nathan doesn't like upper class people? NO SHIT. Classist prick. Nathan doesn't know any intelligent people, he probably thinks if you can answer the phone-in quiz on GMTV you're a member of fucking Mensa.
Why IS Nathan so aggressive? Do you think he was dropped on his head as a baby?
John James looks so handsome when he smiles. Shame he's such a numpty. Are him and Josie in love? I can't tell. It feels like it might all end in tears.
Anyway, blah-bluh-bleh, as Morrissey would say.
Saturday, 3 July 2010
Big Brother 11: Oh, Ben, don't come to the house tonight
Ouch! Shabby got caught out there slagging Corin. That was bad timing. Stop digging, Shabby. Corin in the diary room is fairly interminable, though. She’s a nice person, but there’s nothing to her.
Ad break: is it a good idea to call a new skin cream ‘emulsion’? What next, Avon creosote?
Shabby’s reaction to Ben’s task was bitter, but kind of right. Let’s face it, nothing is worse than when they sent Charley out, then put her back in again: ‘hell, yeah’.
Nathan never dares saying something nasty to people’s face, it’s always after they’re just after earshot. They bleeped out the insult he said about Shabby; it’s post-watershed, so it must have been bad. Don’t like the cut of his jib.
I liked Ben’s joke about John James, why didn’t that make the final cut?!
Ooh Mario is really getting nasty towards Ben. I wouldn't be surprised if Mario puts him up next week. Ben says being gay would affect his career in America but he 'doesn't think sexuality is important'. Mario, face it, you and Ben aren't going to be chums outside the house. He's putting up with you and that's it.
I always end up feeling sorry for Ben even when he's in the wrong, he's like a lost puppy. He is shallow, but he's fun, you know. He's entertainment. But he pushes his luck with Mario. Mario has been there for him.
The crowd did not have banners up. I reckon they told them not to boo, too. This mobile home joke stinks.
Wow that took them so long to stand up when Ben came back in I thought they'd been told to stay seated.
There were literally p-p-p-p-poker faces from Shabby and Keever when Sunshine went. I bet Shabby can't fucking believe it! Ha, I'm glad Shabby and Keever don't feel appreciated in the house: FYI it's because you're CUNTS.
Ife is always getting involved in other people's business because she's just a dull wisp of a person.
Mario: just accept Ben doesn't fancy you, love! It doesn't mean he's a homophobe or in the closet.
Thought John James was going for a wank in the cupboard. Turns out he just wants Josie to sleep with him. She should tell him, 'if you want to fuck me, let's do it.' She aint going to get a better offer' especially if her other offer is Nathan.
I feel for Mario, but I think he's tying himself up in knots. His issues are mainly to do with himself, not Ben.
Ad break: is it a good idea to call a new skin cream ‘emulsion’? What next, Avon creosote?
Shabby’s reaction to Ben’s task was bitter, but kind of right. Let’s face it, nothing is worse than when they sent Charley out, then put her back in again: ‘hell, yeah’.
Nathan never dares saying something nasty to people’s face, it’s always after they’re just after earshot. They bleeped out the insult he said about Shabby; it’s post-watershed, so it must have been bad. Don’t like the cut of his jib.
I liked Ben’s joke about John James, why didn’t that make the final cut?!
Ooh Mario is really getting nasty towards Ben. I wouldn't be surprised if Mario puts him up next week. Ben says being gay would affect his career in America but he 'doesn't think sexuality is important'. Mario, face it, you and Ben aren't going to be chums outside the house. He's putting up with you and that's it.
I always end up feeling sorry for Ben even when he's in the wrong, he's like a lost puppy. He is shallow, but he's fun, you know. He's entertainment. But he pushes his luck with Mario. Mario has been there for him.
The crowd did not have banners up. I reckon they told them not to boo, too. This mobile home joke stinks.
Wow that took them so long to stand up when Ben came back in I thought they'd been told to stay seated.
There were literally p-p-p-p-poker faces from Shabby and Keever when Sunshine went. I bet Shabby can't fucking believe it! Ha, I'm glad Shabby and Keever don't feel appreciated in the house: FYI it's because you're CUNTS.
Ife is always getting involved in other people's business because she's just a dull wisp of a person.
Mario: just accept Ben doesn't fancy you, love! It doesn't mean he's a homophobe or in the closet.
Thought John James was going for a wank in the cupboard. Turns out he just wants Josie to sleep with him. She should tell him, 'if you want to fuck me, let's do it.' She aint going to get a better offer' especially if her other offer is Nathan.
I feel for Mario, but I think he's tying himself up in knots. His issues are mainly to do with himself, not Ben.
Friday, 2 July 2010
Big Brother 11: Goodbye Sunshiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine
I don’t really care who goes tonight, which makes for a bit of a dull eviction emotionally. They are all ‘characters’ but none are particularly likeable. If I was in the house I think I'd strangle Sunshine, slap Shabby and just feel annoyed with Keever.
It was hardly like they asked Ben to snog Mario for a task, he only had to do an arm wrestle. He is being a prima donna. Imagine if he'd had Mario's mole task! He wouldn't have got past putting the outfit on. He got away with picking the stand-up role pretty easy. OMG why is he lying to the group about what Big Brother asked him to do?
Ugh that match.com advert was twee-tronising.
This show is dragging so far. This comedy task aint funny.
Sunshine was laughing at the time but she doesn't know why because she didn't find it funny. Well, how is he meant to know that? Sunshine is digging her own grave right here. John having to tell chicken jokes in the middle of their argument was sadistically amusing. That was weird when Josie told him to shut up. They have a very odd relationship.
Who's that person standing next to Davina? Awkward. It's like Courtney Love's assistant filming up her nose with an iPhone.
This lolly task is a waste of lollies. Mmm, lollies.
I don't know if Ife thinks she's making herself look good by detaching herself from Keever and Ife. It doesn't make me think less of her, but it definitely doesn't make me think more of her.
Uh oh, the screen just died. Someone on digital spy said 'have they tried turning it off and on again?' LOL. That was weird that it just came back on and was up to date. Suspicious. Eviction is not live!
Sending Ben out in front of the crowd? This is wrong! This is diluting the brand! There's so many things wrong with this. He gets to see the crowd/ banners etc. He gets to hear a reaction. It's not cool. Big brother has jumped the shark so many times the shark has become extinct.
Ben has come dressed as one of Morrissey's backing band! OMG cringe! Ben is warming to this! His jokes are peculiar. He's got mascara on! I'm surprised he did it.
How weird that Sunshine went after the way Shabby behaved this week. I can't wrap my head around that. Her dress looks nice. I think she looks quite good, actually.
She didn't even get booed. There seems to be quite a friendly crowd tonight.
More technical problems! It's a tight ship they're running this week.
At least Sunshine dealt with the callers quite well. BB is obviously not happy for the housemates to pick the Bob Righter thing as they keep picking nice days. Didn't Ben ALREADY face the wrath of the tree by doing the stand-up?
Interesting that voiceover guy at the end said the loss of vision was nothing sinister! We'll be the judge of that.
It was hardly like they asked Ben to snog Mario for a task, he only had to do an arm wrestle. He is being a prima donna. Imagine if he'd had Mario's mole task! He wouldn't have got past putting the outfit on. He got away with picking the stand-up role pretty easy. OMG why is he lying to the group about what Big Brother asked him to do?
Ugh that match.com advert was twee-tronising.
This show is dragging so far. This comedy task aint funny.
Sunshine was laughing at the time but she doesn't know why because she didn't find it funny. Well, how is he meant to know that? Sunshine is digging her own grave right here. John having to tell chicken jokes in the middle of their argument was sadistically amusing. That was weird when Josie told him to shut up. They have a very odd relationship.
Who's that person standing next to Davina? Awkward. It's like Courtney Love's assistant filming up her nose with an iPhone.
This lolly task is a waste of lollies. Mmm, lollies.
I don't know if Ife thinks she's making herself look good by detaching herself from Keever and Ife. It doesn't make me think less of her, but it definitely doesn't make me think more of her.
Uh oh, the screen just died. Someone on digital spy said 'have they tried turning it off and on again?' LOL. That was weird that it just came back on and was up to date. Suspicious. Eviction is not live!
Sending Ben out in front of the crowd? This is wrong! This is diluting the brand! There's so many things wrong with this. He gets to see the crowd/ banners etc. He gets to hear a reaction. It's not cool. Big brother has jumped the shark so many times the shark has become extinct.
Ben has come dressed as one of Morrissey's backing band! OMG cringe! Ben is warming to this! His jokes are peculiar. He's got mascara on! I'm surprised he did it.
How weird that Sunshine went after the way Shabby behaved this week. I can't wrap my head around that. Her dress looks nice. I think she looks quite good, actually.
She didn't even get booed. There seems to be quite a friendly crowd tonight.
More technical problems! It's a tight ship they're running this week.
At least Sunshine dealt with the callers quite well. BB is obviously not happy for the housemates to pick the Bob Righter thing as they keep picking nice days. Didn't Ben ALREADY face the wrath of the tree by doing the stand-up?
Interesting that voiceover guy at the end said the loss of vision was nothing sinister! We'll be the judge of that.
Thursday, 1 July 2010
Big Brother 11: Who's your favourite European dictator?
I moved house today! Yet still I blog. Why? Who knows. I'm going to bed soon after.
Josie you've admitted fancying John! Stop lying.
Dear Ben, how about not starting sentences with 'one of my favourite European dictators is...' and finishing it with 'he destroyed three orphanages'. Not much of a vote winner. Why are Ben and Dave cuddling like that? It's so weird. Especially when Dave is saying 'stop kissing and cuddling Mario' whilst cuddling him! It's just borderline homophobia. PS. Dave, aliens more likely exist than God.
Mario looks hot today, kind of stubbly. But I don't trust people who don't 'know themselves' tm. Ashleeeeeen.
Ben talking to the tree of temptation was the lolz. 'Hows your father, apples and pears'. Ben loves the word 'dob'.
I like Sunshine being the fly in Josie's ointment.
Every time they've show Ife tonight she's been stuffing her face.
I don't like the way Keever treats Shabby. Shabby overreacts, but Keever does (warning: Jeremy Kyle speak) 'push her buttons'.
Littlejohn has never been more right than when he said, 'you do care, but you don't want to care' to Josie. I still have no idea what their argument was about though. What I do know is, John James is a manipulative piece of shit.
If my best friend carried on with me the way Keever carries on with Shabby I'd fully expect my boyfriend to hand me my P45. Fucked up. She's way out of order.
That feeling where you fall for someone and it makes you want to be a 'better person' lasts roughly around two weeks before you stuff your face with cakes and go kick a small child.
Although Ife is right to tell Keever to watch it, I just can't warm to her. She seems too wishy washy to me and has no clear personality I can hang my hat on.
Ben saying 'is that understood' to the tree was funny.
The way John James carries on with Sunshine does remind me of how my brothers used to treat me (but without the sexual undertones).
Mario to Sunshine: 'we're here and not in the mirror'. LOL. I like her silky outfit.
Random thought: What did Josie get for her special day?
Oh Sunshine, shut up about being a doctor. Never had the phrase 'it's all going to end in tears' rang so true. She was laughing her head off at the time. Sunshine gets on my wick.
'Big Brother is concerned about you and wants one of your friends to come to the diary room.' What is this shit?
Beware, Littlejohn, she's going to have you up on a rape charge next. Mario was very kind to her, kinder than she deserves. She is encouraging her own eviction here.
I can't believe John James got bollocked for having a joke with Sunshine yet Big Brother let Shabby go on the rampage like a fucking animal the other day.
Bed.
Josie you've admitted fancying John! Stop lying.
Dear Ben, how about not starting sentences with 'one of my favourite European dictators is...' and finishing it with 'he destroyed three orphanages'. Not much of a vote winner. Why are Ben and Dave cuddling like that? It's so weird. Especially when Dave is saying 'stop kissing and cuddling Mario' whilst cuddling him! It's just borderline homophobia. PS. Dave, aliens more likely exist than God.
Mario looks hot today, kind of stubbly. But I don't trust people who don't 'know themselves' tm. Ashleeeeeen.
Ben talking to the tree of temptation was the lolz. 'Hows your father, apples and pears'. Ben loves the word 'dob'.
I like Sunshine being the fly in Josie's ointment.
Every time they've show Ife tonight she's been stuffing her face.
I don't like the way Keever treats Shabby. Shabby overreacts, but Keever does (warning: Jeremy Kyle speak) 'push her buttons'.
Littlejohn has never been more right than when he said, 'you do care, but you don't want to care' to Josie. I still have no idea what their argument was about though. What I do know is, John James is a manipulative piece of shit.
If my best friend carried on with me the way Keever carries on with Shabby I'd fully expect my boyfriend to hand me my P45. Fucked up. She's way out of order.
That feeling where you fall for someone and it makes you want to be a 'better person' lasts roughly around two weeks before you stuff your face with cakes and go kick a small child.
Although Ife is right to tell Keever to watch it, I just can't warm to her. She seems too wishy washy to me and has no clear personality I can hang my hat on.
Ben saying 'is that understood' to the tree was funny.
The way John James carries on with Sunshine does remind me of how my brothers used to treat me (but without the sexual undertones).
Mario to Sunshine: 'we're here and not in the mirror'. LOL. I like her silky outfit.
Random thought: What did Josie get for her special day?
Oh Sunshine, shut up about being a doctor. Never had the phrase 'it's all going to end in tears' rang so true. She was laughing her head off at the time. Sunshine gets on my wick.
'Big Brother is concerned about you and wants one of your friends to come to the diary room.' What is this shit?
Beware, Littlejohn, she's going to have you up on a rape charge next. Mario was very kind to her, kinder than she deserves. She is encouraging her own eviction here.
I can't believe John James got bollocked for having a joke with Sunshine yet Big Brother let Shabby go on the rampage like a fucking animal the other day.
Bed.
Wednesday, 30 June 2010
Big Brother 11: It's my lucky hat
BEDGATE! Ben looked befuddled when his bed tipped up. I wish my bed did that, it'd be handy in the morning.
OMG Ben to John James: 'you're a lovely person but you're so stupid.' His morning diatribe was the best. Eat that, John James. Suck it up, idiot box. I would like to have heard the whole hour of that argument.
Questions: Would you give up your personal items for tobacco? Would Dave give up his Bibley? And does Shabby have to always be such an arsehole?
Shabby telling other people to give up their stuff, but she's not giving up her hat? JESUS. She's such a dickwad.
Shabby looks bedraggled. She is projecting all over the shop. She has so little self-awareness it's mind-boggling. John James and Shabby: so misunderstood.
Shabby would rather give up her photos (ie. her FAMILY AND FRIENDS) than her hat. Oh, God.
Big Brother, I DARE YOU to burn the housemates items on a bonfire and show it on a big screen (including Shabby's family photos as she doesn't care about them anyway).
I'm glad Shabby is suffering over the stupid fucking hat, just like they made Sunshine suffer over the crisps.
They should KICK SHABBY OUT for the way she behaved in the 'nest'. That level of aggression is unacceptable. I would feel totally unnerved around her. 'Having a benny'- LOL. Bring back Nikki Grahame, at least she was an amusing spoilt little brat.
Shabby's lucky hat isn't working out so well for her, now, is it? She's fucking UNHINGED. Which family member's photo did she screw up?
I don't think I've seen someone make such a prick of themselves on Big Brother for years! It really is spectacular. I hope Keever watches back Shabby calling her a bitch and saying she was basically a tease.
Josie: 'whenever I feel a bit low, I always think of that woman who got her face ripped off by a chimpanzee'. I DARE you to say that to Shabby right now. I double dare you. Me and my best friend are always going on about that chimpanzee. The reason he did it was because the woman had had a haircut and he didn't recognise her! Haha. I recommend the 999 call. It's a horror show.
LOL to Ife coming out and celebrating the tobacco! Shabby soon crawled back round. Can you imagine the atmosphere Shabby is creating in there? She's a fucking MONSTER!
I liked the red herring about Shabby winning the task. Thank fuck she didn't. She needs to leave before she's fucking stretchered out.
Ooh Keever. Bad loser. Shabby was happy Keever was up. I fucking pray Shabby and Keever do go together, the nasty fucking pair. Good riddance to bad rubbish.
Keever is probably desperate to leave and see her boyfriend.
Dave is SO insincere. He's not gutted in the slightest. Keever was rude to him, though.
I can see why Shabby is attached to that hat. Her hair is shit. Sometimes I wake up in the morning with my fringe looking like that. The answer is simple: wash it.
John James in a wheelchair? Shame no one's broken his legs.
'What have I done?' Shabby laments. Where to start? When John James is your best ally you know you're so far up shit street you're blocking the toilet.
OMG Ben to John James: 'you're a lovely person but you're so stupid.' His morning diatribe was the best. Eat that, John James. Suck it up, idiot box. I would like to have heard the whole hour of that argument.
Questions: Would you give up your personal items for tobacco? Would Dave give up his Bibley? And does Shabby have to always be such an arsehole?
Shabby telling other people to give up their stuff, but she's not giving up her hat? JESUS. She's such a dickwad.
Shabby looks bedraggled. She is projecting all over the shop. She has so little self-awareness it's mind-boggling. John James and Shabby: so misunderstood.
Shabby would rather give up her photos (ie. her FAMILY AND FRIENDS) than her hat. Oh, God.
Big Brother, I DARE YOU to burn the housemates items on a bonfire and show it on a big screen (including Shabby's family photos as she doesn't care about them anyway).
I'm glad Shabby is suffering over the stupid fucking hat, just like they made Sunshine suffer over the crisps.
They should KICK SHABBY OUT for the way she behaved in the 'nest'. That level of aggression is unacceptable. I would feel totally unnerved around her. 'Having a benny'- LOL. Bring back Nikki Grahame, at least she was an amusing spoilt little brat.
Shabby's lucky hat isn't working out so well for her, now, is it? She's fucking UNHINGED. Which family member's photo did she screw up?
I don't think I've seen someone make such a prick of themselves on Big Brother for years! It really is spectacular. I hope Keever watches back Shabby calling her a bitch and saying she was basically a tease.
Josie: 'whenever I feel a bit low, I always think of that woman who got her face ripped off by a chimpanzee'. I DARE you to say that to Shabby right now. I double dare you. Me and my best friend are always going on about that chimpanzee. The reason he did it was because the woman had had a haircut and he didn't recognise her! Haha. I recommend the 999 call. It's a horror show.
LOL to Ife coming out and celebrating the tobacco! Shabby soon crawled back round. Can you imagine the atmosphere Shabby is creating in there? She's a fucking MONSTER!
I liked the red herring about Shabby winning the task. Thank fuck she didn't. She needs to leave before she's fucking stretchered out.
Ooh Keever. Bad loser. Shabby was happy Keever was up. I fucking pray Shabby and Keever do go together, the nasty fucking pair. Good riddance to bad rubbish.
Keever is probably desperate to leave and see her boyfriend.
Dave is SO insincere. He's not gutted in the slightest. Keever was rude to him, though.
I can see why Shabby is attached to that hat. Her hair is shit. Sometimes I wake up in the morning with my fringe looking like that. The answer is simple: wash it.
John James in a wheelchair? Shame no one's broken his legs.
'What have I done?' Shabby laments. Where to start? When John James is your best ally you know you're so far up shit street you're blocking the toilet.
Tuesday, 29 June 2010
Big Brother 11: The famine of intellectual nourishment
Shabby sleeps in the kohl! But not the bowler. Ife's slagging Shabby. But who can blame her?
Mario, quit with the Bennuendo. It's becoming painful. Ben ignores it beautifully.
Oh, Sunshine, rallying against the world. Stop justifying your lifestyle choices.
Nathan wants to be a porn star. Ben, hand him the razor; off with the body hair, starting with the monobrow. Who would want to attach a string to that fucking ape?
Why is Josie always clad solely in a towel? Why is she so down on herself? Are these two things connected? She doesn't 'make the best of herself' as my mum would say.
Ben wants a morsel from Nathan. I want Nathan to fuck off. Corin nominating Mario! Nooooooo. I've STILL not seen him strip. BB are censoring him!
Quite a mixed bag of nominations this week. Surprised Keever didn't go for Ben again.
IFE YOU MADE YOUR BED ABOUT THE CRISPS, STFU.
John James nominating Ben! What bullshit. Boo. Backstabber.
Josie. Tiresome. You're not nominating Sunshine over crisps, come on now. It's cos she's competition.
Ooh Mario using the word 'mercurial'. Fancy! Shabby, man. You're a donkey. Can't believe she didn't nominate Ben though. Steve voted for the right people!
Sunshine: ironically, the very definition of dour.
Mario believes in karma. No wonder Ben got bored of the conversation. Loved Ben's reaction!
Is Shabby telling Keever off for being nice to people? Fuck me, she's so pathetic. I was more mature at thirteen years old. Shabby's argument went like this: 'you're being too nice to people... you're being spiteful.' Well, which is it?
BAD atmosphere in that house today. Which equals good TV.
I like it when they give them non-alcoholic beer and don't tell them. It's mean but funny.
Oooooh John pulled out the 'love you like a sister' line. Mario is worse than Graham Norton for his crassness.
Aw, Steve needs to win to get some new legs. Don't put robo-Steve back in the cupboard.
John James on the Bible: 'how can you read that shit, it doesn't even make sense! I could have wrote it better than that.' They should put that on the back. That drunk thing really makes my skin crawl. 'High on the holy ghost' indeed. Get him out this week. He's a homophobe and a fantasist.
Don't antagonise the John James! You'll be in his firing line next. And you WON'T LIKE IT. He didn't come out of a lemon tree. Whatever that means.
PS. Don't piss on my back and tell me it's raining. Now you wouldn't hear THAT come out of Ben's mouth.
Mario, quit with the Bennuendo. It's becoming painful. Ben ignores it beautifully.
Oh, Sunshine, rallying against the world. Stop justifying your lifestyle choices.
Nathan wants to be a porn star. Ben, hand him the razor; off with the body hair, starting with the monobrow. Who would want to attach a string to that fucking ape?
Why is Josie always clad solely in a towel? Why is she so down on herself? Are these two things connected? She doesn't 'make the best of herself' as my mum would say.
Ben wants a morsel from Nathan. I want Nathan to fuck off. Corin nominating Mario! Nooooooo. I've STILL not seen him strip. BB are censoring him!
Quite a mixed bag of nominations this week. Surprised Keever didn't go for Ben again.
IFE YOU MADE YOUR BED ABOUT THE CRISPS, STFU.
John James nominating Ben! What bullshit. Boo. Backstabber.
Josie. Tiresome. You're not nominating Sunshine over crisps, come on now. It's cos she's competition.
Ooh Mario using the word 'mercurial'. Fancy! Shabby, man. You're a donkey. Can't believe she didn't nominate Ben though. Steve voted for the right people!
Sunshine: ironically, the very definition of dour.
Mario believes in karma. No wonder Ben got bored of the conversation. Loved Ben's reaction!
Is Shabby telling Keever off for being nice to people? Fuck me, she's so pathetic. I was more mature at thirteen years old. Shabby's argument went like this: 'you're being too nice to people... you're being spiteful.' Well, which is it?
BAD atmosphere in that house today. Which equals good TV.
I like it when they give them non-alcoholic beer and don't tell them. It's mean but funny.
Oooooh John pulled out the 'love you like a sister' line. Mario is worse than Graham Norton for his crassness.
Aw, Steve needs to win to get some new legs. Don't put robo-Steve back in the cupboard.
John James on the Bible: 'how can you read that shit, it doesn't even make sense! I could have wrote it better than that.' They should put that on the back. That drunk thing really makes my skin crawl. 'High on the holy ghost' indeed. Get him out this week. He's a homophobe and a fantasist.
Don't antagonise the John James! You'll be in his firing line next. And you WON'T LIKE IT. He didn't come out of a lemon tree. Whatever that means.
PS. Don't piss on my back and tell me it's raining. Now you wouldn't hear THAT come out of Ben's mouth.
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