Tuesday 29 June 2010

Big Brother 11: The famine of intellectual nourishment

Shabby sleeps in the kohl! But not the bowler. Ife's slagging Shabby. But who can blame her?
Mario, quit with the Bennuendo. It's becoming painful. Ben ignores it beautifully.
Oh, Sunshine, rallying against the world. Stop justifying your lifestyle choices.
Nathan wants to be a porn star. Ben, hand him the razor; off with the body hair, starting with the monobrow. Who would want to attach a string to that fucking ape?
Why is Josie always clad solely in a towel? Why is she so down on herself? Are these two things connected? She doesn't 'make the best of herself' as my mum would say.
Ben wants a morsel from Nathan. I want Nathan to fuck off. Corin nominating Mario! Nooooooo. I've STILL not seen him strip. BB are censoring him!
Quite a mixed bag of nominations this week. Surprised Keever didn't go for Ben again.
IFE YOU MADE YOUR BED ABOUT THE CRISPS, STFU.
John James nominating Ben! What bullshit. Boo. Backstabber.
Josie. Tiresome. You're not nominating Sunshine over crisps, come on now. It's cos she's competition.
Ooh Mario using the word 'mercurial'. Fancy! Shabby, man. You're a donkey. Can't believe she didn't nominate Ben though. Steve voted for the right people!
Sunshine: ironically, the very definition of dour.
Mario believes in karma. No wonder Ben got bored of the conversation. Loved Ben's reaction!
Is Shabby telling Keever off for being nice to people? Fuck me, she's so pathetic. I was more mature at thirteen years old. Shabby's argument went like this: 'you're being too nice to people... you're being spiteful.' Well, which is it?
BAD atmosphere in that house today. Which equals good TV.
I like it when they give them non-alcoholic beer and don't tell them. It's mean but funny.
Oooooh John pulled out the 'love you like a sister' line. Mario is worse than Graham Norton for his crassness.
Aw, Steve needs to win to get some new legs. Don't put robo-Steve back in the cupboard.
John James on the Bible: 'how can you read that shit, it doesn't even make sense! I could have wrote it better than that.' They should put that on the back. That drunk thing really makes my skin crawl. 'High on the holy ghost' indeed. Get him out this week. He's a homophobe and a fantasist.
Don't antagonise the John James! You'll be in his firing line next. And you WON'T LIKE IT. He didn't come out of a lemon tree. Whatever that means.
PS. Don't piss on my back and tell me it's raining. Now you wouldn't hear THAT come out of Ben's mouth.

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