Sunday, 4 January 2009

Celebrity Big Brother 2009: I'll wash my nuts in the sink

Yes, finally something to write about!
Urgh; well I was right about Tina, wasn't I? Talking about her fee; crass! What is Terry only got 30K after she said that was a pittance? How uncouth. Talking about her weight; zzz! She's 'anti-fat'? She don't look it. She lost 4 stone already? Shiiiiit. Calling herself a bird; pathetic! I hope she doesn't drag Terry Christian down with her. Even her own daughter said on BBLB she hoped that her mum would 'bite her tongue'.
Could there be a least useful housemate than Tommy? Like Brian Paddick in I'm a Celeb... he sucks the fun out of any given situation. Humour-voids r us. Watching him letch over Lucy wasn't great either.
Haha, Terry saying Coolio had a nightmare about the sales of his last album. Ulrika doesn't seem to like Coolio too much. I'm not sure if I do either.
Tina. 'You give out what you get back.' Oh, the old karma argument. How I love it. I guess Maddy Mcann's parents must have been some school bullies, hey? You dumbasses! Life is a series of random events which may end one day with you being splattered over a pavement, or splattered into a car window, or if you're really lucky, with the death of everyone you've ever known before the gradual rotting of all your bodily organs, including your FACE. So go shove your karma up your fucking arse with the fairies, and the ghosts, and God, and all of those fairytales that keep you warm at night. (soz, I'm in a bad mood; I've got tonsillitis again and spent half the day in casualty- poor me!)
Did Tina mention she'd lost weight? Did she mention she's doing alright for money now? Her and La Toya seemed like they were having a competition about who was the hardest done by, but neither of them were listening to a word the other was saying. So you both married abusive bastards? Did the karma fairy dish out those love matches for you? As a feminist I felt weirdly unmoved. I'll blame it on the Nurofen.
Tina ass-licking La Toya about Michael was as pathetic as it was transparent. I think (hope) Terry is onto her and won't let the Northern comraderie distort his vision. Her swearing is really too much as well; I know I like a bit of it, (in an artistic context- ha!) but I wouldn't f-and-blind in front of La Toya Jackson, because she seems too demure.
Interesting Terry put Ulrika up; I bet the producers are shitting themselves about that one. What is his motivation? I think he finds her a bit stand-offish. Maybe he sees her as competition? Maybe he heard about her pay packet for BB? I will leave my options open on that one.
If I had a choice between the FA Cup and hot water, I'd pick the FA Cup and I hate football, just cos it's something to do. You can wash in cold water! I frequently do in my flat. It's like a lucky dip if I get a hot bath or not. Why does that 'fat bird' (her words not mine) consider her shower so important? She physically repulsive anyway, and it's all to do with her manner, not her body size. Mmm, nice fag stash. Cough cough.
Ulrika's face looks a bit puffy. Why is she always wearing that coat? She was wearing a coat and scarf in bed last night. Oh dear; she might be cracking up already. Not a good sign. Bit disappointed that she's moaning already.
I liked Verne educating Coolio on Cockney rhyming slang. Hold up, what's a spooge? I need educating in reverse. He looked cute on the diary room chair. He seems quite pensive. I wonder what he thinks to everyone?
And that concludes my third blog of the day. I should be bed-ridden more often.


* (asterisk) said...

thing is, these people don't live in the real world. When Coolio told LaToya that he was the first person in his family to earn over $1m, she was like "Really?" And she couldn't believe that his dad earned only about $60,000 a year as a carpenter. Crazy cuckoo-land fucks.

I like Terry. Always have, though. Think Red got it right when she said the guys are all okay, and the women seem mostly to be wrong 'uns.

I like that Tommy. And Verne seems all right, as it happens.

Might watch some more from time to time.

(So how much is Tina getting?)

Anonymous said...

The amount of physical and mental abuse LaToya has suffered from the hands of her brainwashing father and then twisted, aggressive ex husband, is horrendous. I would be disturbed, weak and incredibly insecure so I have a lot of respect for this serene, quiet but chirpy woman. She is made of sugar and not in a bad way either.

I like Terry, always have. Verne's ok too. I think the likes of down to earth Mutya and 'boring Ben' are simply too normal for the show hence we easily forget they're there.

Get rid of Tina.