Goodbye, Big Bro

'I know it's over, still I cling, I don't know where else I can go' as Morrissey once sang, and today, I know the feeling.
I haven't blogged in while but it felt only fitting to use a dying format to say goodbye to a friend of 18 years, Big Brother. I do think BBUK will continue, like Glenn from The Walking Dead coming out from the dumpster 'in one form or another', and it definitely still exists in one form or another internationally, and for that, I'm grateful.
Big Brother has meant so much to me over the years, from making friends, forming relationships, blogging, podcasting, arguing online, arguing in real life, arguing because we care, we fucking care about this thing that yes, IS still on, except now... it isn't.
The ironic part is that it feels like things are just kicking off for our BB on Blast podcast in the past year or so, getting to go to the house, getting invited to talk to the producers, becoming mates with Arisa, host of BB Canada, and it can't all be for nothing, can it? Can it?
Big Brother on C5 is often slated, but thinking back over the moments we've had over the past few years, there's been a lot of really, really good ones. I'll leave it for the other fansites to take you on that trip down memory lane, but from Danny Wisker and his canoe to Kim Woodburn's 'adulterer!' madness, it's been a wild ride, both 'civillian' and celeb. I still don't really understand why C5 is killing the top rated show it has, but they have made a lot of bad decisions recently (removing Lewis, for example). I won't be tuning into whatever brain rot they put on instead. BB is life, C5 is not.
Will it go to Netflix? I feel like there's been a hell of a lot of hints. And I don't even mind it having 'a rest' for six months. But come on. We need UK Big Brother. The audience is there, and on Netflix, the international audience is there also. We could have live feed again! I know, I'm a dreamer. 
Last night was such a (!) blast. We were invited to the house, met in the pub beforehand, and were sent more free drinks from a mystery benefactor than I should have drunk. Trevor Boris, aka Marsha the Moose, came by to say hi! He didn't have to. Paul Osborne got Lewis and Mollie, hardcore BB fans onto the guest list with us, he didn't have to.
We passed Brooke and Tomasz and got smuggled into the camera runs, and saw the four housemates sat on mental chairs up the corner. It didn't feel real. We went in the task room and Gaz stuck his hand in a mystery box full of goo and probably still hasn't washed it. We were given a Big Coin each; what a treat! We didn't expect these things. We were lucky.
Jarrod and Matt held up signs. I held Garry's hand as votes were announced, and Gaz held mine, too. Mollie, Lewis, Gaz and I sipped on contraband vodka from my hipflask (wannabe edgy). Alfie was there, Chris, Jonnie... all friends I didn't have but now have, thanks to Big Brother. We sang to All These Things That I've Done which played over the highlights, my favourite Killers song, and one I'd just put on my Desert Island Discs for work the week before. How did you know, Big Brother? How did you know? It was magic.
The old housemates were all there, right by us, all except Ellis, Isaac (what did he have to do that was better?!) and you know who: the real winner, Lewis.
Emma cried. Half the grown men I was with cried. My eyes were watering all the way home, but I think I was just drunk! That's my story and I'm sticking to it.  
We watched and I booed Cameron and called him a misogynist, but I didn't really care anymore. It was all love and light on the night, probably because I was so hammered. It was about more than who won last night. It was about a story ending.
OK: so now I'm going to watch the episode as it's such a blur when you're there. It was a peculiar final, too short, the wrong finalists (debatably) and little fanfare or nostalgia, really. If I hadn't been there, I'm not sure how it would have felt to watch on TV alone. Looking at Twitter, the overall feeling was rushed, but I've sat through finals that have been too long, too.
OK, so there were some token throwback highlights at the start, including C4 stuff. We were screaming for Kinga! I note the prick in tinfoil also got shown, and even Aaron Allard Morgan!
First up, let me clarify, I have never 'whoop whoop'ed in my life and never will. I feel like that's important to state.
It's mad to think Big Brother started in the year 2000, when I was 20! I remember it like it was yesterday, specifically the Nasty Nick times. We had a Nasty Nick shrine, FFS. It's no wonder I've never grown up, maybe I've just been stuck being 20 since then. It would explain a lot.
Emma IMO did not look that emotional, but I'm not keen on her anyway. I thought her velveteen robe dress made her look a bit Cruella De Ville too. See how she said, 'Quite possibly the last champion'. They have been saying shit like this the whole way.
OMG I totally heard Lewis (my friend Lewis, not Lewis F) shout 'Netflix' as to what the future holds for Big Brother, ha and Emma giggled.
Emma saying 'time is most definitely not on our side' = C5 shade. The eviction outfits aren't great, I must say. We've seen them all before. Zoe looked the best, Akeem just looked like he had his work shirt on. I was surprised they had to do a two by two eviction on the final night but it was the right two to go first. Cian was fourth and Zoe was third. She seemed very happy to be going with Cian. When you're there, you can't hear a word they say in their interviews, so I was interested to see this.
Ugh I hate Emma's hair so much (might as well say it for the last time). Blonde does not suit her and nor does the Donald Trump bouffant. She used to have the coolest short hair when it was dark and slick. FAIL.
Wow, there was 1% between Zoe and Cian! Not surprising, they are replacement level housemates. He is bit fake and a bit of a buttkiss, whereas she's real, but a misery guts.
Not much of interest in their interview, Cian was a bad friend, Zoe has periods.
Was interesting when Emma told them it was the last ever series and Zoe went 'flipping heck.' That made me sad.
Ooh the housemates going in to The Killers. How GOOD does Lewis look giving that peace sign, DAMN. Btw, shout out to Sian's red hair, it looked fabulous. Nice to see all these clips of Lewis. Criminal he wasn't there because of a joke (admittedly a really bad taste joke). Still gutted we were denied his best bits and interview. I paid good money to keep him in this house. Mind you, this highlights package is pretty Lewis heavy. At this point in the crowd we were SCREAMING 'I've got soul but I'm not a soldier!' (Ooh, I just found a good fanmade Lewis best bits on YouTube)
That was actually a really good clips package of the entire series Big Brother did there.
Why they gave Lewis G the airtime to promote his single, I don't know, but I enjoyed chanting 'off' and 'who are ya.' Disgusting to see Hussain there and not have Lewis there. Yuck. The only clothing line Hussain will be bringing out is in his mum's back garden (sorry if someone already did that joke on Twitter, I haven't looked that far down yet!)
Cameron was shaking like a shitting dog waiting for that announcement. Well done mate, great gameplan. Now fix up your YouTube if you've learnt anything in the house. Hopefully it's that equality isn't being allowed to punch women in the face and coming out (one of the times) by calling yourself 'bent' isn't a great look. 
I voted for Akeem to win, but I wasn't bothered about him coming second. He was a nice guy but he's no Lewis. His best bit was probably when his dog went in. Doing the two thumbs up for the photographers too, dearie me. That is so Akeem.
Lol at Emma saying Akeem gave it 110%. Emma: 'You have been phenomenal' to Akeem and him going 'I have.' Ha! Bold.
Ah, Akeem seems quite emotional in his interview! Emma telling him his parents are on holiday, ha.
Akeem: 'I do a lot of training and delivery for my job.' No shit!
The most exciting thing about Cameron winning was seeing Tony Dadley walk right by me in the audience. I booed and tried to get me giving him the thumbs down on camera but I'm too short! Haha.
Tony Dadley going, 'Do you know what you've done?' If the answer is, 'Played the idiot general public?' The answer, I'm pretty sure is, yes.
Cameron: 'I thought I was going to be irritating, annoying, I moan a lot..' Weeellll. Emma right up his arse. Well, we know she's a misogynist too (just ask Hazel). It's just 'his storm'. Like going 'Kill all Jews' was just Lewis's storm another year. Funny how it works, isn't it.
Don't get me wrong, I actually think Cameron was a good housemate, and an interesting and entertaining one. The only downside is his previous behaviour, blatant gameplaying (coming out three times, please) and fake storylining (seeing a ghost, for example). But he was good to watch and bitch about. There, I said it. I hope he has learnt something, I really do and I hope he doesn't spend 100 grand on Brexit stickers and Trump colouring books.
I'm glad Emma actually ackknowledged Lewis's existence in Cameron's interview and the importance of their friendship.
Emma going 'You have won Big Brother not Lewis'. Yet he would have had he been there.
Cameron had only come out to five people before (and Twitter). This crap that he never planned to come out in the house is one of the most bullshit things I've ever heard. Don't insult my intelligence.
Emma telling Cameron he won the last Big Brother. He genuinely looked upset. Yes, genuine emotion at last !
Was amazed Emma mentioned Davina and Brian at the end. Brian! First bit of respect he's been shown in a while.
Oh Emma did actually look upset at the end there. When she said 'it's time for this house to find a new home' you can hear Gaz scream, haha. Apparently they're demolishing it this week. Rubbish.
I feel they could have done more with the end. The voices bit is a good call back but could have gone on for a few more minutes.
'Big Brother will get back to you' - well, you'd better. I had to cuddle several weeping grown men at that point, you don't know what you've done, Big Brother!
I just watched a BBBOTS too and Emma and Rylan's emotions seemed very real. I actually blubbed. They are right that it seemed like the most Big Brother series for ages. The production values were on point, and the tasks were fantastic.
I think you'll find BBBOTS was Russell Brand's baby though, let's be real. Big Mouth was so fucking good.
Cameron in his BBBOTS interview on coming out: 'I couldn't have written it any better.' That's because you did write it, duh.
Wow to Rylan saying 'Me, Marcus and Emma will make sure Big Brother will get back to you.' Strong words! Yet why all the tears then? It's hell to hope. 
So will I do with my evenings now? Wait for CBBUS? Watch old BBUKs (must be time to do a new 'Blast from the past' episode... even if it is BBUK4, eek)? Have a social life?
To all my BB fam, I know we'll stay talking. I've genuinely made some of the best friends I have from people I've met, to people I haven't, who live an ocean away. It's the way we met and our common connection, but we will be friends regardless. We've been lucky to have the show for 18 years, nearly half my life. We'll be lucky if it comes back. And if it doesn't? We've got each other.

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PS: Keep listening to BB on Blast! We'll cover US and Canada. Send in any bbuk finale feedback to bbonblastpod@gmail.com before Friday. Love you!

Review: Harry Hill! TV Burp recording at BBC Television Centre

Last night I went to a recording of Harry Hill’s amazing TV Burp. I was a bit worried it would ‘ruin the magic’ but if anything, I was even more impressed with him.
We were kept waiting a fair old while; we started queuing about an hour before the doors opened at 5.45 and we didn’t get into the studio until 7.10. They did give us free beer in the foyer though- blergh. The BBC building is like some relic from the 60s, it’s so weird, it’s like an old school or something.
The set looked really good in ‘the flesh’ not disappointing at all. The warm-up man left a bit to be desired (as always)- it was end of the pier stuff with him laughing uproariously at his own jokes. Mind you, have you EVER seen a good warm up man at a TV recording? I have not.
Harry came out ‘in character’ and had some lols with the crowd. The show is filmed ‘as live’ but about 20 minutes longer so you watch all the clips and everything just like you would at home. It’s all set up so you can see really well- it’s the same studio where I saw Jonathan Ross and Ponderland, I think.
*Warning- some of this section might ruin Saturday night’s show for you*
It was a really funny show. I really liked the stuff about The Cube or ‘the rectangular cuboid’ (!) and Christine Bleakley even put in an appearance. My god, she’s like a giant! She looked ten foot tall. The chimp thing was hilarious and the African guy with the mad eyes was good. They had to reshoot the ‘FIGHT’ bit three times! There’s a really funny bit with Alan Sugar that they had to reshoot, too.
It was weird seeing clips of Eastenders that even we hadn’t seen yet. Eastenders are blatantly trying to get on Harry Hill at the moment- remember when they wouldn’t even give him clips from the show and he had to do court drawings?! How times have changed.
There were untold other funny things; his pronunciation of ‘Calypso’, the silly song he did about people he went to school with (which he did in one take- impressive when you see it), X Factor, and that ridiculous Eddie Stobart show. We didn’t get to see the knitted character in person but I have a knitted character at home, so that’s OK.
It was weird seeing what he does whilst the clips are on, he’s kind of gurning and twitching, he doesn’t come out of the zone for a minute.
One bit that was a bit weird was that the song at the end where he has a guest on was NOT live! It had already been filmed and they just showed it on a screen! So that didn’t feel right.
The strangest bit was at the end where they had to do some ‘redos’ as we used to call them at the plastic surgeons. They brought out the script for him and he sat there listening to headphones and marking it up for about 15 minutes. I thought it was weird he didn’t do that bit off-stage, as it didn’t feel right seeing him all serious like that after everything.
To make us laugh at bits we’d already laughed at before, he told new jokes just before he shot them, there was one about his Tamogotchi getting raped and another about his granddad being mad for heroin! Not the sort of thing you get at teatime on ITV. So it was nice to see those off the cuff bits- he sang a bit of Moz, too. He also joked about You’ve Been Framed and called it ‘money for old rope’. Quite!
We snuck off a tiny bit before the end because we were starving and it was all stuff we’d seen, so we were a bit naughty. Rebels!
All in all, it was a fantastic night, and I’ll be interested to see what they cut out and what they leave in. I’d definitely recommend going to TV shows as a free night out- you just have to queue up early, as I learnt long ago. I never did get to see Most Haunted Live (thankfully).

The X Factor: First Live Show

Hands up who's sick of that Little Britain voiceover guy? He's on the adverts, he's on the quiz shows, he's probably even the fucking banker on Deal. Well, I'm sick of his schtick. He's more omnipotent than talk about the credit crunch. He's about as cutting edge as a night out with Duffy. So, perfect for the X Factor really.
So, let's get it out of the way early; I miss Sharon. I miss the unpredictability that she might punch someone. Cheryl and Dannii aren't going to punch each other, much as the producers would have us believe they want to. Cheryl is alright, don't get me wrong, but with her monotone accent and Dannii Minogue's mooing, it's like they are having a competition to see who sounds most like a geezer-bird. (I apologise for the use of the word bird, but it fitted with geezer nicely)
Dermot declared it 'a great honour' to go first; actually, it's normally first on, first out, so not so great. Here goes something:
GIRL BAND: Louis nodded furiously. They sounded flat and their dancing was stiff. The song had no high notes or low notes, lucky for them. They are quite ordinary, and the Quality-Street dresses were duff too. Why were the judges so kind?
AUSTIN (Allegro): Androgyny! I'm a boy and he's a girl and all that. Might look good in a dress? Did Sting which was unpleasant. Sang it OK but nothing to get excited about, despite his leather trousers. I kind of fancy him, and am kind of repulsed by him, so it's a weird mixture.
DANIEL: This years sob story (tm). He seems lovely but X factor? Non! Not with a name as catchy as Daniel Evans. Oh God, flat as the battery on my laptop (still dead!) Awful song. Styling. Dated. Dreadful. Haha Louis compared him to Ricky Gervais taking the piss! Meow! It's not 'sob story' Idol, Dannii. Next!
ALEXANDRA: Last week I wanted the little blonde Samanda lookalike in instead of Alexandra, but I have to say, she does have a good voice, the best so far, certainly. Sparkly! Diva! Pretty! But still a bit boring.
JLS: What does JLS stand for? I demand to know! Oh, they said. Jack the lad swing??? What the fuck? Are they dyslexic? I thought their voices sounded quite reedy tonight, but I thought they were alright in the auditions. Is it me, or do they all look quite... petite?
SCOTT: Just what the world needs, another Shane Ritchie! SWING! I can just about deal with schwing! when it was Leon Jackson dishing it out like a cut-price but still fuckable Josh Harnett. Shane Richie's love-child and I have to draw the line. SHIT! '110%'!!! Check! 110% was not enough in this case, peculiarly.
RACHEL: Oh dear. I know she's a cunt but even she didn't deserve being made into a cut-price Gabrielle. Her hair was nice before! Frowny, shrieky, shit outfit, dreadful dancing. Simon looked like I felt. Shame, as she has a fantastic voice, even if she looks like she will nut you if you look at her the wrong way. I wasn't buying her 'thank you, that's been taken on board' replies to the comments. It was like a robot giving you a kiss. Dannii fucked this one good and proper.
DIANA: My favourite by a country mile. There is actually something unusual about her; i.e. she does appear to have some star quality, or this mythical X Factor. Thank god she's ditched that frosty pink lipstick. Fuck, they gave her U2! And still she did it. She's great, fuck you Dannii saying she overdid the quirky. She IS quirky, i.e. not bland like you.
BAD LASHES: I think Bat for Lashes may have something to say about this band name, but I don't think she needs to worry quite yet. What are bad lashes anyway? Naughty lashes! Behave! Ooh Roxette! Power ballad city. They seem more sexy than Girl Band, a bit more rough around the edges, which I like. Cheryl called them 'spunky'. Simon rolled out the 'eating water' description again. He's used that one before, as Bad Lashes rightly (and impressively) pointed out just as I was writing it. Can we pull his string for a new metaphor?
EOGHAN: Try texting that in! Oh fucking hell, fucking IMAGINE! FUCK OFF IMAGINE! If I NEVER hear Imagine EVER AGAIN I will still wish John Lennon has been shot ten years before he wrote the fucking thing. I'd rather listen to the Frog Chorus. And yes, I have said that before. I've got Simon Cowell disease. I actually like Eoghan (or OWEN, if you're confused and reading this) though. He's good. Danni cracking onto him! Trying to steal Mrs. O's crown. Naughty!
RUTH: I just cannot, cannot, cannot bring myself to care. Ooh, Spanish. So what? AVERAGE! Ooh, Stars in Your Eyes ending, they havent had one of those for a while. PS. Ruth doesn't sound like a very Spanish name to me.
LAURA: Oh God, Alicia Keys. I want to punch Alicia Keys in the face. Her and Jack White could happily be sent to the fucking moon and left there if I had my way, the pair of vain, boring bastards. But anyway, this is about Laura. Despite Alicia, she has one of the best voices in the competition. Only Diana to beat for her.
Urgh, Dermot said 'cracking'! This is my number one pet hate of the moment.
Results show... mm, Leon flashback. He's the fittest midget ever! Drool! Mr Blister, who are you backing this year? There's no real Rhydian campness, is there?
I liked the fact they made the bottom two sing different songs as it's such a fast-forward fest when they sing the same song again. Ooh, deadlock. 'Citing.
Bad Lashes shouldn't have gone!!! I liked them. I liked the one with the big face, and I liked the one who had hair a bit like me. And I even liked their mild murdering of Wonderwall!
Well, it's certainly not like the British public to make the wrong choice is it? Much! Booo.

Gig: Conor Oberst and The Mystic Valley Band (Electric Ballroom, Camden)

So here I am, walking past a queue of people seemingly no taller than five foot (and I aint MUCH taller), to see screamy-turned-country-cokehead-genius-and-isn’t-he-cute!- Conor Oberst. The crowd does not match the music on offer tonight. But these are eyelinered teenagers who fell in love with The Calendar Hung Itself (that was the first Bright Eyes song I ever heard) and Lover I Don’t have to Love (if you’re younger).
Why do we stick by Conor as he goes from brain-bleedingly vital (Desaparecidos) and downright genius (Letting Off The Happiness/ Fevers & Mirrors/ Lifted/ Digital Ash) to generic country bumpkin? Because look how many albums WERE downright genius. How can you fall out of love with someone who gave you so much? I am a loyal little fucker and he has done more for me than 99.9% of people on this planet just by existing.
And so I took my place at the front of the barrier amongst the crowd who were 80% female and 80% under 20. I might be older, but I’m the same age as Conor. He speaks for me as well.
The support band were a bit peculiar, a Welsh David Icke lookalike and a guitar player who would have made a rabbit in the headlights look like it was sitting on a sun-lounger sipping a cocktail. But my general feeling was, it could have been a lot worse.
I had reasonably low expectations for the gig; I was fully expecting it to be a full on country-fest, which it was to an extent, but it seemed to work well in it’s own bubble. You just have to push the back catalogue out of your head and appreciate this for what it is. I saw quite a chunk of Conor at Reading on BBC3 and I thought it was OK, but it was much better when you were there (plus he didn’t look quite so much like he was in fancy dress).
Conor and The Mystic Valley Band came on in a collection of puke-coloured shirts. Conor later said they were ‘ill’; I think ‘drunk’ was more the word he was after. The guitar player looked like he was struggling to stand and Conor later said it was because he’d dropped acid right before the show; if that was the case, he did a sterling job.
I’m quite fond of the Conor Solo album anyway, but it seemed more alive on a stage, less mellow and like it was meant to be heard this way. The stripped down numbers like Lenders in the Temple and Milk Thistle were lush and I thought Conor’s voice sounded really good, especially as he seemed to have a sore throat. The lighting was really cool at times I thought and they did one song that I have an acoustic version of that they really rocked up and it sounded brilliant (I don’t know the name of it- they did it at the BBC session and it says untitled!)
Minor gripes; I don’t think there was one member of the band that didn’t sing a song (even the bloody drummer sang one!) which seems a bit of a waste; like getting some gormless ballboy to play a set at Wimbledon whilst Nadal sits drinking some barley water and staring into space. Actually those songs were OK, and the covers, and I thought the whole set was pretty good (oh OK they pushed it a bit at the encore, but the very last song made up for it.)
I do just enjoy watching Conor, I like watching him fall apart a bit, and stumble round, and I especially like it when he SCREAMS. The final song (which I have discovered is called Breezy) saw Conor take to the keyboards, for this ballady number, then halfway through the song kicked in (I Believe in Symmetry style!) and there was a fair amount of shouting. It felt like a moment. It was an absolutely brilliant song and I want it now!
I actually thought him playing no Bright Eyes tonight was just right. I’m sure some eyelinered teens will have been disappointed. But I’m older. I’ve seen him on five or six tours now. They just should have been born earlier!
PS. I think Conor will be our Madonna and go a bit pop/ dancey next. I’m hoping anyway.

Derren Brown: An Evening of Wonders

So for my birthday on Friday night (30 May) for my pressie I was taken to see Derren Brown at the Garrick Theatre. Yes I am obsessed with Derren! I'll be glad to be on his side when he's running the show, believe me.
I went to see his last show as well, back when he was straight. I guess that one was more spectacular in a way, what with him stopping himself breathing and stuff, but this one was just as good, really, in a different way.
One thing I noticed that I didn't notice last time was the massive amounts of nodding Derren was doing, he was like a little nodding dog. He does nod a bit on the TV but this was ridiculous. It's annoying that he's just putting stuff in your head and you don't know why. Annoying, but good.
There seemed to be a hot and cold theme to the night, Derren kept dropping 'warm' and 'cold' into the conversation and sniffing and saying he was ill (yeah, right). Then in the interval it got massively boiling and freezing again. The weird part of all of this was it was never explained, so I can only presume he was just fucking with us. Naughty Derren. I liked it at the end of the show last time I saw him where he showed you how he did some of his tricks, but he didn't give us his secrets this time. Aw.
I won't ruin the show too much, but it was good fun and mind-bending as usual. There was one bit where Derren basically appeared in a monkey suit from nowhere- does he have a twin? I was looking at him on the other side of the stage one second before. The bit where he rang this guys friend was highly amusing (mainly when he made the guy ask his friend what he was wearing and he replied 'trousers, why, what are you wearing?' The trick he did with him was pretty good.
The only bit I didn't like that much was the table tipping because it dragged a bit, but it was impressive when it floated (allegedly!)
The mind reading at the end was particularly ace, I liked the fact that he knew some guy had called him a wanker just from looking at the initials on the envelope. How did he guess one woman had a fear of dressing gowns? How?! One things for sure, psychics are liars. One other thing is for sure, I want to learn cold reading! It's so impressive. Derren is God. He might as well be.
How did Derren have what was going to happen in the show (and what people were wearing) written in a locked box at the top of the stage? The answer is, he couldn't, of course. But he did.
And for that, I salute him. Why are all my idols gay?

X Factor: First Live Show- 'Like Eating Water for Dinner'

And so the X Factor finals begin. Dermot looked quite hot, even with a slightly Hitler-esque side parting. First on was Kimberley, looking like Marylin Monroe after 10 pints. Simon appeared to be having a hot flush for the first quarter of an hour of the show; either that or he'd hoovered up a sackful of cocaine before the opening credits. Next was Andy, who had clearly been practising smouldering in front of a mirror, but was let down by his comedy eyebrow movements and helmet hair. Futureproof had on their future-proof jackets, but failed to dazzle. Beverley had on a wig. Leon was absoloutely dreadful, like a manic puppet but still looked hot as hell. Emily looked like she'd been dressed in the dark by Kelly Osbourne. Also, cheer the fuck up!
Same Difference: does the world need another Steps? This is a rhetorical question. They're a pair of gonks, aren't they? Dead-dad surprised me by being the best of the night but still managed to shoehorn her dead dad into conversation three times in one thirty second intro clip. Alisha was dullsville, but I didn't think Daniel aka Clicky Nark was as bad as they said, despite having the cold dead eyes of a fish.
I was hoping people had left the thorns in the roses they chucked at Rhydian.
(No) Hope were alright vocally, except they look like a bunch of town centre bacardi-breezer swilling hussies.
Sharon is still the best of the judges, Louis is a weasel, Dannii is pointless, and Simon rocks, coke-binge or not.
It was a travesty Kimberley went, she was fun if nothing else. Alisha is kinda boring. I enjoyed Kimberley going 'oh fuck' after her performance and Sharon stomping off in a huff. Bring on the drama!