Wednesday 25 July 2012

Big Brother 13: Onion argy-bargy

Not another bloody party! They have more parties than Lindsey Lohan. I like it when Americans use the word 'partying' when they mean taking drugs. I've done so much partying, I'm suffering from exhaustion = I'm a drug addict and I need a lie down.
Well they've got the most childish housemates sewn up. I once ordered someone a bouncy castle as a prank when I was about 15 after they ordered me cabs and pizzas for an entire night. I think I won that one. The person's mum rang up and my dad gave me a tell-off, but it was quite half-hearted. Booked that bouncy castle through the Yellow Pages, too; old skool.
First R-Pattz and K-Stew, now Luke and Ashleigh to break up? My faith in love has been shaken!
The boys are so sad listening in on that conversation; they'd diss the girls for doing the same. Him and her both basically said the same thing about each other; they can't stand the sound of each other's voices. True love. Like Conor laughing! What a supportive friend. His face was a picture.
I think 'humiliated' is the word Ashleigh is looking for, not annihilated. That enormous bed looks ace. Luke can't exactly complain, he said much the same about her behind her back. Careful there on that high horse, Luke S, you're on shaky ground. He hates anything that dents his ego. I've seen some showmances in my time, but this one is really built on the sand.
This task is sexist. What are they going to do next; try on shoes? Luke A must be pleased he made the transition, this is pathetic.
Luke S is really PISSED off. What's his prob, she only said he had an annoying voice and he stinks? LOL. Onion boy! Chop, chop, it's all in the mind etc. Funions! (Jesse off Breaking Bad)
Ashleigh: 'you make me out to look like a fucking arsehole.' She's not a very nice person, is she? She's just a shallow bitch. She's not got a nice word to say about anyone. How can anyone LIKE Conor's hair? Shaven armpits on men? Oh, please. Nair thanks.
Does Luke S REALLY like her? I think HE likes her more than she likes him! But I still don't think that means much. Relationship? Relationshit, more like. Luke S: 'I'll be happy one day.' When?
Ashleigh: 'Blind people can only see in the dark. They can feel objects better than we can feel it in the dark.' This might be the most stupid thing she's said yet.
Why is Caroline guffawing at the word 'transistioning'? What does Caroline regret the most? Is it that hairdo?
Wow, Deana's great, great, great grandad is 110. 'What does he look like?' Deana: 'He can still walk and everything but he passed away last month.' What?! I also hear her great, great, great granddaughter is pretty fine.
Caroline: 'Let's make a toast to the happy couple... onions.' LOL.
Luke A shouldn't take offense at Caroline laughing; she just has no emotional intelligence. She literally is the type who'd 'laugh at a funeral' like in that rubbish song from the 90s.
Is Luke S trying to teach Ashleigh etiquette? I think that ship has sailed. Licking your plate is fucking disgusting and I eat like Kerry Katona. I like Deana's earrings. Not so much Adam dribbling.
Ratleigh's ears look particularly big when she scrapes her hair back. I think they hate each other. Perhaps they'll have a hate fuck later, with Caroline looking on, giggling or scowling.
If Conor's a raver you think he'd be a bit more loved up. They're not so much dancing as walking round in a circle. Should have played Basshunter instead.
Adam copped a good feel of Ashleigh's sweaty boob area, didn't he? Ha, I'm surprised Luke did sleep with her in the end. He IS into her a bit! I have no idea why. She must smell like money.

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