Wednesday 18 July 2012

Big Brother 13: Says she in that frock

I saw a friend tonight and said, 'Are you watching Big Brother?' and she said, 'No, I'm not enjoying it and it's boring.' Can't really argue with that sort of common sense.
One mark for the clip of Scott going 'boo woo' again; we can't stop saying it in this house, it's almost as if that has become the correct impression.
No marks for the rest of the entire show. Why does Luke A care that a bunch of cretins don't like him? Isolated? You've got three friends in the house, it's not that bad. I think Luke A is having a 'boo woo' day. He's going to boo woo his way out of the competition if he's not careful.
Is Luke A wearing Arron's onesie, or is that just a communal house onesie? Does it get issued with the rulebook?
The fact Luke A thinks Luke S was 'cool' is quite telling. Luke A is as cool as a pair of microwave slippers.
They don't show much of Scott, really do they?
I'm glad Sara is sticking up for Deana. Adam is being really silly. It's obvious that they are going to pick off Adam next. She was saying 'you're part of her crowd'. It was a compliment. You ARE NEXT, you dick. Now fix up, because you're shooting yourself in the foot bad. It doesn't put you in a 'terrible position'. You were on the precipice anyway, dickwad.
Why is Luke 'sucking ass' of the darkside after just declaring he wouldn't? It's a bit late to campaign now, we vote, not them. He's keen to stay, isn't he? Perhaps he should have stopped skulking in the smoking corner.
Adam has never liked Deana from day one. The outsiders used Deana to make up the numbers. I'm glad she's not up this week.
Caroline does look fat, actually. Fat, ugly and horrible, what a winning combination.
They're actually letting Becky do the shopping list? Conor: 'I hope they fuck it up.' Yeah, don't let a girl do it, whatever you do, they're bound to fail. Conor, don't threaten to throw chicken nuggets over the wall. What did they ever do to you? About as much as Deana did. Probably less.
Oh God, Luke A is trying to mend fences with Becky now. He's starting to look a bit desperate. You're on the ropes. Don't suck up to the people. They've put you there.
WHAT!? How come Caroline is getting told off for bullying? What about CONOR? What's that as a result of?! Bad edit. I can't tell what's going on. Don't get me wrong, Caroline getting called in by the Tell-off man is no bad thing. I only wish it was the Tell-off man off Breaking Bad and he was armed and dangerous.
It IS difficult to undo that horrendous personality, isn't it, Caroline? She should have heeded Benedict's words; she's a nasty spiteful little girl. Conor tells her to just keep doing what she's doing. So he can win.
What did Becky order, 300 cans of Spam? Oh no, 12 billion bars of chocolate.
Why are Caroline and Lauren making up now? I don't buy it for a minute! Ironic Lauren is sucking on a spoon when that's their nickname for her. You lied to me, you lied to a spoon.
What's 'instercourse?' Is it when someone has sex with Becky in sepia tones?
I know something that will make Ashleigh's doubts about Luke A 'resurface'. Luke S: 'Lauren walks like an elephant.' Charming. Why is Ashleigh obsessed with Lauren? Is it because Lauren is smart, pretty and normal? Yes. Luke S doesn't even fancy Lauren! He was just trying to get with any 'bird' and you're the lucky chicken, Ashleigh! Squawk.
Ashleigh is putting all the paranoia she feels about Luke into Lauren. 'They know about farms.' What!? 'I feel thick.' You are thick. You're an embarrassment. I'd hate so much to feel like that. Can you imagine being that stupid? It would be frightening. It would be terrifying trying to understand the world when you have no emotional intelligence or otherwise. How could her parents have let it happen? Why is she always going on about how thick she is? Read a fucking book. Why is she obsessed with learning how to cook? Just get a bloody takeaway.
Luke A is trying to show his 'fun side'. Bit late! I don't mean to pick on him, but he's being so transparent.
Caroline is having a Fair Isle meltdown in the DR. Will someone give her a fucking hairbrush? WHY did she get in so much trouble? Did she threaten to rape someone? Did she do another racist attack? It would be nice to be told. More importantly; why has no one nominated this disgusting creature yet? Give it a tissue and tell it to fuck off. BOO WOO.

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