Saturday 17 September 2011

Big Brother 2011 - At what point can you see my testicles when I bend over?

What self-respecting contact lens wearer needs to look in the mirror to put them in? You do that the first week. After that, you sort of work out where your eye is.If you haven't, I wouldn't go claiming to have a supersized IQ.
Have these housemates never heard of bisexuals? My boyfriend on Aaron's internalised homophobia: 'If you play with those things, you have to be prepared to get dirt on your hands.' And my boyfriend knows about these things!
He's right, though, you can't really go to bed cuddling a guy on TV and then complain when people question your sexuality. And Aaron comparing cuddling Tom to cuddling his kid is a mildly disturbing red herring. This is going to become interesting. Aaron is becoming a must-watch character. Him and Rebeckah could pretty much keep the show afloat on their own on their almighty neurosis boat.
Alex and Aaron's discussion on music was hilarious. That was a quality five minutes of TV. Brilliantly baffling. 'What is N Dubz?'
I like Alex! I like her car crash make-up, and her personality. She's just rough and ready. She's my pick to win, but realistically, I think Jay will.
Why is Mark always so crass? I actually find him quite creepy. He's probably going to touch someone up inappropriately sooner or later. You heard it here first.
Why are they playing Scott and Charlene's wedding song? Showing your age there, Big Brother.
So if you have a sulk in there nowadays, Big Brother gives you a photo of your baby? Sounded like they were counselling him in there! I remember the days when Big Brother was impartial and authoritative. THIS COUNTRY HAS GONE TO THE DOGS. Pull yourself together, Aaron, you big sap. And Big Brother, pull your socks up.
How come they've still got access to Pammy's room? Honestly, they're living the life of Riley in there. I'm surprised they don't send in prostitutes carrying profiteroles and pizza for them.
Heaven and Tashie's positive energy rain dance was fabulous. That's where positive energy gets you. Very disappointed. You're better off listening to Morrissey and staring out the window.
Oh no, they're playing Adele over Tashie's eviction. We can only take so much. Fetch the razorblades.
OMG Rebeckah, fuck you. It's not Harry's fault Tashie got evicted, it's Tashie and her non-stop positive energy, card shop cliche BS. Rebeckah is a disgrace to humanity, she really is. She's a viscous, nasty, mealy-mouthed piece of shit and I don't say that lightly. She's so awful, I kind of wanted to like and defend her, but I can't justify it. I can't believe how much leeway the other housemates give her in that house. Kudos to Tom for telling her to STFU.
Anton digging Tashie out when her grave isn't even cold. Nasty man. WTF is this music they're playing in the house. OMG I feel SO OLD.
Aden's rap was the lols. I used to hate Tom but he's growing on me a bit. He seems quite reasoned at times. Mark is 100% playing for the cameras fake, and I've got no time for it. Aden is just like a desperate little puppy. He's going to look back on his time in the house and die of shame.
What's with Faye and Aaron? I don't like her. I've seen no signs of life. Plus he loves Louise. She's proper pissed - that's going to be embarrassing in the morning.
I like the fact there's no Carol/Vinnie Jones in there insisting on putting the lights out and telling them all off. LOL to them lobbing the mattress in the swimming pool. Eat that, Jedward.

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