Big Brother 8: 'The Right Person Stayed'

Literally gobsmacked at how brainwashed the house is now. I can't believe they said it was an easy decision to let Gerry go, and even implied they would have been stuck if it had been Brian Vs Carole! Oh my God, can you imagine if they kicked out Brian for Carole. Fuck a duck! Listening to them all say Carole deserved to win was abuse of the ear. The only reason Tracey disagreed is because she wants to win. Fat chance, love. I'm glad Gerry stuck the knife in the sour-faced crone as he left. I hope they remember that come nominations.
Amanda: if you don't know if you like someone, it means you don't. End of story. You either do or you don't. The break up was quite sad: I was pleased she had the balls to say it, and Brian was brave to ask straight out, 'Do you fancy me?' It was all very sad and innocent. Is Brian a virgin? My money's on yes.
What was that weird conversation with Liam and the twins at the dining table about? Amanda had a face like thunder (which I enjoyed). Was Liam having a go at her because she ditched Brian? Was he testing the water? He's got a cheek calling her naive just because he likes his date to get a few pints down her neck then open her legs. But then Amy virtually put it on a plate for him and he chickened out! It's all front, I tell you. I don't like him one bit.
The whole bread argument was tedious, but then it involved Carole, so it figures.
Two more weeks.

Big Brother 8: A Break From Myself

So Charley did her usual thing of attacking the world because she was hurt. Far from not being 'bovvered' about the crowds chants, she was heartbroken by it. So she started on Gerry, who was wearing a rather fetching pair of rubber boots. Saying he liked 15 -year-old boys was beyond the pale and her saying 'I didn't know it was illegal' thing didn't really wash. What DOES she have to do to get rubber-booted out of there? If I was Gerry I would have been furious. If it was Ziggy she'd said it to, he'd be going bananas. But because it was Gerry, no one really gave a shit. Carole has proved herself a complete coward, telling Gerry to stop fighting because she's too scared to tell Charley. I think Gerry was completely let down, by Big Brother and his housemates alike.
Obviously feeling a little attention-starved, Ziggy chose this time to throw his toys out of the pram and say he wanted to leave. His manipulating of Chanelle's emotions is unforgivable. Big Brother should pack his suitcase and tell him to hop it.
Carole joining Chanelle and Ziggy in the shower was just horrible. There is something a little bit desperate about that. Not cool.
What else? Liam spoke a few words of wisdom. Did not believe Charley's repenting speech for one second. She'll be off again before you know it. Please can we get rid of her this week? Pretty please?

Big Brother (not) 8: Who IS she?

Well, I've just come in and am watching BB but there's little to say about it. Except, why were Chziggy in bed together? It really annoys me the way the show is edited these days, they can't string a storyline together. Seeing the make up would have been nice. That shower scene was a bit raunchy. I'm glad they are back together, despite my Ziggy hate. I'm an old romantic at heart. Aw.
And are they trying to save Nicky by making her funny? I'd literally never heard her laugh before and everyone's incredulous faces were quality. She glows when she smiles. But she's still a cunt sock. The Gerry Grease thing was funny though. And Charley and Liam... interesting!
But enough about that: I have my own BB related tale to tell you...
Tonight I was running the writing group. So far, so boring. Yet there was a girl there who seemed strangely familiar. At first I thought she reminded me of my friend Mel. Then there was something about the way she looked and her voice. Then it dawned on me, this girl looked just like Nikki from BB7. I snuck a look at the register where people sign their name, and there it was. She was NIKKI'S sister!!! I won't say her name because she's entitled to her privacy despite falling into my blogging lair by accident.
I spent the rest of the evening staring incredulously as her commenting on people's writing. How strange was that? She was so similar to Nikki, slight build, long blonde hair, same mannerisms, kind of fidgety and pouty (but with glasses). I loved hearing her talk. Nikki had the best voice ever and made me laugh my arse off. Who would have thought Nikki's sister was an intellectual?
No one else recognised her (because they are intellectuals too, except me). I really wanted her to come to the pub after but she left quite sharpish. I would have probably said something to her, I'd have to really wouldn't I! Hopefully she wouldn't be too embarrassed if I did. I hope she comes next week, she seemed really nice. She took a copy of our anthology with her so who knows, Nikki could be reading my poetry as we speak! And if that aint surreal, I don't know what is...

Big Brother 8: My Party Is Better Than Yours

What a hoot. Big Brother torutured them with Aggadoo and Pass the Parcel and locking them in a room with Nicky, who could start a fight with a newborn baby for looking at her funny. I correctly suggested a snake for her face-painting, but I was shocked she agreed to it. Maybe she's more self-aware than I thought.
Of course this wasn't really a hoot, for them or us. Ziggy looked suitably annoyed. I found Chanelle's singing unintentionally very amusing. She looked pretty in her glitzy dress. She has more genuine charm and kindness than the Zigster.
Brian seemed genuinely affected by Emily using the N word (you dumb-ass Charley, as if he's not allowed to have an opinion on that matter.) and I sensed he may have been the victim of racism in the past. Blunderbus Charley didn't seem to cotton onto this and instead tore shreds off him instead. i was impressed she didn't actually shout: I was willing her to. I love Brian and his touching honestly, I loved his anger and his tears and his brave face in the party room.
Charley could learn something from him. But she won't.

Big Brother 8: Naked Nominations

What was that conversation Ziggy had with Nicky about? It was really weird. Were we meant to think, 'Ziggy! I'm impressed by his honesty!' Er...
The frown lines on Nicky's face are getting drastic. Nothing will shift them. Every time she has a go at Gerry it's like a dagger in my heart. What image does she think she portrays? There is nothing to like about her. Except her fringe and red lipstick. And she only brings those bad boys out on Fridays.
What else? Liam's thighs are disgusting. I can't stand flabby men! I like my men breakable (and I WILL break them). However, Charley saying people on the outside had been dissing him was unforgivable. What a bitch.
Tracey nominating Ziggy and Gerry- yawn! You're a cunt scarecrow- deal with it.
Ziggy also made himself look like a prick trying to curry favour with Charley in the bathroom. What a twonk. If he's not careful, she will twist things to her advantage. More so than normal.
So thanks to BB selective punishments Charley escaped again. Sigh. Still, I'd rather she stayed than Nicky. At least she plays the game, and doesn't just try and cause it's death via grating voice.
Something tells me it's not exactly going to be a close run eviction race this week. Big Brother, fetch Nicky's broomstick and get her the fuck out. BYEEEY!

Big Brother 8: What's Gluttony?

How can you go through life not knowing basic English? I really do despair. The seven deadly sins task was quite good but I was waiting for them to wake Laura from her sleep and poke her with a cattle prod. Maybe tomorrow.
I thought Carole picked the right people for the sins in the most part. Nicky and Laura are utterly miserable; do they ever laugh? Just treat it as a joke, it's just a game, for God's sake. Tracey's face said it all and her 'it's phat' thing said in a menacing tone really didn't fly with me. You're greedy. Deal with it.
Carole dealt with the jelly bean situation with all the tact and maturity I've come to expect from her: i.e. none. What a muppet. I also thought she should keep her nose out about Laura's dressing gown. Who cares if she hasn't washed it. It's her body. if she stinks, just don't go near her.
Amanda handled the hotdog thing very well- I wouldn't have lasted five seconds in that outfit. The clip of Sam pushing her over and abandoning her on BBLB was genius, there was a genuine look of hatred in her eyes, hahaha. Ziggy handled the gluttony thing with class- no need for the sixhead and the demon twins to torture him further by singing inane ditties outside the window. Give the poor man a break!
Charley dealt with her task better than I expected, and I felt her pain as she hid in the bedroom from all the awful singing. She did look quite cool with her cap at a jaunty angle and an orange vest. I bought an orange vest today, though, so I may be biased.
And did my ears deceive me or did Ziggy say 'I love you' to Chanelle at the end? I rewound it four times on Sky and I can't work out what else it could have been. Shock horror. I do feel he is too good for her, even though her is flaky and manipulative at times. I can't quite wipe that 'I wanna be a WAG' speech she made out of my head. If he'd been around to see that, maybe things would have been a bit different.

Big Brother 8: Unhappy Birthday

Another Big Brother episode that is intangible and unmemorable floats by. The nomination thing was funny and embarrassing for some, I always like it when they show them up like that.
I shared Brian's frustration that there were no fun girls in there. No fun guys either. When Gerry pretending to talk to his mum in Greek on the fish phone is a highlight, you know something is amiss.
And how much more of this Chanelle/ Ziggy situation can we take? He never stops needling her for reassurance. I swear I would have punched him in the face by now. She doesn't help though, she encourages it if anything. His patronising 'I'm so proud of you' speech had me gagging too. What a tosser. And still he's about my third favourite in the house.
The party was funny, but I feel like they edit out half the good bits sometimes, especially this series. However, Charley's drunk ramble at the end was particularly good- how hung up on Ziggy is she still? They should definitely give them more booze and more parties as it makes for a more entertaining housemate.
I think Big Brother fatigue is setting in now, and they need to do something drastic. Unfortunately, the producers seem completely out of ideas too. It's a shame: there's a long way to go, and a ratings disaster could spell the end for Big Brother- no matter how much money they throw at it.

Big Brother 8: The Dimmer Takes It All

Let's face it, there are few ways this could have worked with a happy ending. The ending we did get, was anti-climatic but perhaps one of the best ways it could have worked out. Let's look at the options (from their suggestions): Laura- no way. Amanda- possibility. Ziggy- I feel it would have been a poisoned chalice for him. I was surprised they didn't deliberate more, but Liam was a non offensive choice, and I don't think people will turn against him. He's such a bore though- YAWN. Buy a new baseball cap. They WILL turn against Carole, Seany and Jonathan, however. I would have maybe given it to Tracey. I want Gerry to win, and he couldn't have won with that money hanging over him.
Aside from the loser-at-the-Oscars smiles, Charley's 'what reason did you choose him for?' summed her up to a tee. As if they were going to give it to you, you grasping mare.
All in all it seems a big fat waste of 100K that they could have spent on making the show a bit better. They literally must have money to burn.
In other news, Carole ruined the whole moment by monaing about a towel for the thousandth time. Why would ANYONE want to keep her in? I'm sick of looking at her sour face. I want to punch it, to be honest with you. Dear God, please release her.
Anyway, I won't be here to see it, as I'm off to Glastonbury tomorrow. Pray for sun and look out for me, I'll be the one with the frog umbrella. Good luck with that.
I will be Sky-Plussing and will catch up next week. Keep Seany in! I know he put a condom on Gerry's bear but he didn't mean it and I'm sure he's sorry!