Sunday, 15 June 2014

Big Brother 2014: She's six foot under already

So last night I missed Christopher's meltdown and Chris's secret nomination of him. When Chris went 'Am I nominated?' after Christopher's nomination flashed up, I thought that was inspired. I was surprised Chris nominated Christopher, I consider him to be on 'his side' so Christopher must be hella hard to live with. And Chris said he felt sorry for Christopher, then put him up!
Anyway, onto tonight. Danielle seems to have slipped under the radar again; I think she's wisely keeping her mouth shut.
Toya butt-kissing Pauline HARD. I don't get why her and Steven are SOOOOOO up her arsehole. Even MARK has seen through it! Mark! Matthew has her dead and buried already.
Christopher's having to sit through another person criticising him - Helen! Pauline's theory of why Tamara got evicted doesn't even make sense. Why would people VTE Tamara cos Pauline had beef with Jale?
Pauline, you're right, the vote to evict you is tactical. The power housemate doesn't want to live with you because you're batshit kerazzzzzy.
Kimberly referring to herself as stoic, ha. She's like Robocop when they take his dopamine away. I wish a 'smiling assassin' would take Mark out. With a sniper.
Chris: 'They swallow her bullshit and enjoy it just as much as the dinners.' Nice.I mean, obviously worked on, but nice. Chris is so normal. My boyfriend: 'He's just like someone off a course or something.' 
I can't understand this flirting task, secret mission or not. I'm not feeling the tasks this year. They seem somewhat half-arsed. Why not let us vote on the app for some decent ones?
What's Toya's problem? She's miserable as sin. She's really backed the wrong horses with Pauline and Helen this year. I don't get why Toya and Steven like Pauline so much! Arghhhhhhh!
LOL Chris put Steven up! That was my boyfriend's recommended nom nom. LOL, serves him right, lickspittle that he is. He's not taking it well, is he? He's such a giant bell end. I honestly don't know what his deal with Pauline is. Maybe his mum's dead or something? There's no rhyme or reason as to why he's so far up her crack.
Pauline: 'Jale wants 100K more than she wants self respect.' Where does this even come from? Is something happening that we're not even seeing? I doubt it because they'd show it, like they're showing lip balm wars. How does Jale keep so calm? I would have knocked her block off. Look at the group of Steven, Helen, Toya and Pauline; they look miserable as sin, speculating about who could hate them, but they can't decided because it's EVERYONE.
IT'S NOT UP TO YOU WHO'S UP FOR EVICTION, HELEN, YOU FUCKING HAG. Honestly, I can't put up with much more of this bullying bitch. She's so entitled, I can't bear it. I can't even look at her face anymore.
God, has anyone ever reacted so ridiculously to being nominated than Steven? This guy is the biggest numpty on the planet. You're not gonna get the power, Steven, because you CAN'T BE TRUSTED WITH IT. You have BAD JUDGEMENT. And also, the 100K prize money you would blow on fireworks? If your popularity was doled out to you in them, you'd get about half a sparkler, you cunt.

4 comments:

Leslie Nunya said...

I love you so much! You describe the housemates so perfectly in such concise and scathing sentences. Your blog should be required reading for every housemate upon their exit. And some of them can't leave soon enough. Watching the latest episodes is almost unbearable.

lightupvirginmary said...

Aw, thank you very much, I appreciate that! x

Anonymous said...

Love the last sentence especially!!

Anonymous said...

Love the last sentence especially!!