Sorry I've been awol. I've been out and then I've been ill, plus I hate this show. I just watched some live feed and couldn't decide who to strangle first; Carol, Janice, Les, rubbery Danielle or Louie. When your favourites are Lauren, Courtney, Screech and Abz, you know you're in trouble. Also, take heed that I predicted Ron would say something dumb in my last blog. Mind you, that doesn't exactly make me Alison Dubois.
I honestly can't remember a more unlikable group in the house. Even the people I 'like', I can barely tolerate.
I read somewhere that Danielle said she's 32. I'm 33 and she looks old enough to be my mum. Not a great advert for botox. Carol McGiffin is odious and clearly an alcoholic, so she'll probably win it. She makes Denise Welch look civillised.
I don't think they should have played the cult footage into the house. Just typical boring shitstirring. I'm glad they didn't put Courtney up, though. She would have been an easy target. I like Courtney, she has a sort of cartoon charm.
Janice is a sore loser, a drunk and talks to the camera. Plus she keeps going on about nominations. The makers of Zeo must be furious than Janice is drinking it. At least Louis is calling her out on her behaviour, and she hasn't got a word to say in return. I guess her and Les didn't have to do much acting after all.
Aw to Lauren saying she'd never had a friend. I don't mind Lauren; she looks like a mad auntie, but that's alright. At least she's eccentric. Abz and Lauren should get their own gardening show.
I'm sure Louis would be like 'so what' if he was put up - not. He'd be gutted! Having said that, I've never seen so many sore losers about being up. It's the game. Get on with it. Janice is bitter.
Oh God, not a task where they rank themselves again! Ha, lining up in age order. This should piss a few people off. Is Danielle older than Dustin? She sure looks it. I'd say he's got it spot on.
Ha, now they have to line up in order of hotness. Lauren's deadpan face when Louis said 'you're a particular market' to Lauren. I love the fact Lauren thinks she's a goddess. Ha, Sophie looked SO pissed off that she was lower than Carol. Charlotte the sexiest? God help us! I'd rather have sex with a pig in lipstick, it would probably have better manners, and definitely better conversation. Dustin was quite high, too. Ron is sexier than Janice?! Ouch. Courtney didn't look too impressed either. Danielle was lower than Bruce, lol. Poor Lauren at the bottom.
I don't buy this 'Charlotte's naive' act in the DR, either. It's all an act! Her whole personality is contrived.
Honestly, Danielle thinks she's so entitled to be in there! No one has a clue who she is, and she seems like a total arsehole! Just STFU and be glad you're even in there; you don't deserve to be.
Ugh, I hate these eating tasks! It shows such a lack of imagination. It's not I'm a Celeb! I can't bear it. Are cream crackers really that hard to eat? It's just regular food, isn't it? Dog food is appropriate for that thing from Geordie Shore. I don't get these tasks, they're just not pleasant to watch. Gross.
This cuckoo task is so weird, too. I think the task team have actually gone on holiday.
OMG just when I thought I could hold my dinner down they show Lauren doing Ron's feet. I can't even bear to look at feet, not even my own, which are reasonably bearable. I'm glad when summer's over so I don't have to look at people's wonky toes shoved into sandals. Sickening. I can't STAND people touching my feet. My natural reaction when someone touches my feet is to kick them in the face. I couldn't go out with a foot fetishist, that's for sure.
Is Carol really lecturing Charlotte on drinking? Funny.
Ha, I'm glad Louie is being rude to Danielle because she's being a total psycho. He's very frank, which can be hurtful, but at least you know where you stand. I actually hate Danielle now. What's the point of her? Also, that skull cardie she's wearing looks like it's off the market.
Sophie want to walk out with her 'integrity intact.' Good luck with that.
Why are they giving the celebs so much booze?!
I liked Courtney warning Danielle when she was bitching about Louie and he walked in. Danielle KNOWS she's going because it's vote to save and no one knows who she is.
How drunk is Mario making a run at Sophie? Nice try, kiddo.
Oh God, Charlotte's not going to shit herself, is she? Carol doesn't like it when someone else in the house is drunker than her! She's probably jealous.
Courtney's my favourite! She's almost wholesome in a weird way. Courtney FTW. Everyone else: for the torture chamber.