Sunday 2 September 2007

Totally Jodie Marsh: The Wedding

Oh how we have waited for this hallowed day. Even the presenter was taking the mick. How could you get married to someone you don't love, argue with, and who tells you what to wear and that you shouldn't wear so much make-up as you look like a clown, and have the presenter take the piss out of you too? Dear oh dear. Worse, no one is even watching this (except me).
So in the end the plush venue was... Jodie's parents house. What happened to the circus and the bondage? I feel cheated!
Jodie's dad said arguing is all part and parcel of married life. True, but not part and parcel of your courtship! Call me an old cynic.
I did feel a bit sorry for her that everyone was taking the piss out of her celebrity guests for being too z-list. It's a fucking wedding, not a movie premiere. Should she just invite celebrities for the sake of it? (Oh God, why am i standing up for her?)
The highlight of the show was probably Jodie's cleaners saying the husband was a good choice 'as he doesn't leave skid marks in the loo' and then finding her 12 inch (!) vibrator in her bed whilst they were changing it. Then picking it up. They need danger money.
Then the happy couple argued some more. Then the groom had her name tattooed on his arm. Then Jodie had his name tattooed on her arm. Because we all know that makes a love last forever, right?
Then Matt asked his mum, 'so how do you feel about Jodie becoming Mrs Peacock?' Silence.
Her actual wedding dress was nice although too big for her to actually walk straight in. It was bright red which I quite liked. She walked down the aisle to 'can you feel the love tonight'. Vomit. Ahh it was nice when they kissed though. I'm easily swayed!
Then... she gave him the deeds to her house. Er...
For an 'intelligent person' Jodie should have made sure she had some say about what the final show looked like as everything from the credits to the edit just sent her up. I wish her all the best but by God, is she going to need it.

6 comments:

Shep said...

She's no Abi Titmuss...now there's class.

What?

coxon le woof said...

Sadly, I found myself watching this as well. I had to fill the void left by Big Brother. Is this what my life has come to?

I did however think that given the lead up to it, the actual wedding was reasonably classy and therefore a complete let down for an utterly dreadful series.

And don't even get me started on my hatred of the concept. This programme and it's attitude to marriage, annoyed/disgusted/enraged me no end!

lightupvirginmary said...

I don't think Jodie's going to be too pleased when she sees the final cut.
And I give the marriage... six months.
Shep, you don't see much of the Titmuss these days do you? (well, I don't.) Can't say I'm missing her.

Shep said...

'The Titmuss'. Genius!

Having seen her amateur video work...I can honestly say she's always been my go-to girl for sleaze, vapidity and no-nonsense self-promotion...

lightupvirginmary said...

I saw pics of it in the paper but didn't actually watch it... John Leslie talking dirty.. that's the stuff of nightmares.

Shep said...

The bit where she describes the other girl licking her arsehole is worse...

Hmmm. Too much information?