Tuesday, 18 September 2007

The Pick-Up Artist: Your Old Life Dies Here

My boyfriend downloaded a really funny show tonight called The Pick-Up Artist, which i think is showing in America at the moment. It is basically America's Next Top Model but with geeky men in it. Which is no bad thing, when you think about it. The premise is these are a bunch of socially inept, awkward virgins and this guy comes in to train them to be lotharios. Fine: except for the guy himself is an absolute mingaloid! His name is 'Mystery' for starters: I'd have gone for 'Enigma' myself. He also has two henchmen: Matador, and J-Dog (I may have got that wrong). Mystery's fashion sense leaves a lot to be desired: he was wearing this ridiculous leapord print jacket, and alternating his headwear between goggles (what the fuck?) and a ridiculous black fluffy hat (I'd go as far as to say BONNET) which has to be seen to be believed (really: google him). I can genuinely say that no amount of charm (i.e. bullshit) would make me go within five miles of him or his greasy mates.
Weirdly, I found myself attracted to several of the geeks. There is something strangely sexy about awkwardness, shyness, even flab sometimes. And of course, geeks have brains. Intelligence is my number one thing for fancying someone, not fuzzy felt hats. It made me sad to hear of the geeks wanting to be James Bond: fuck that: they should just go out with fellow geek girls! All 'Mystery' (real name Eric) is going to teach them is how to be sleazy and say horrible one liners. Their 'prize' is the winner gets to go hang round with Mystery and his grubby hat for a year, picking up STDs. Lovely.
Rather cruelly, Mystery made all the geeks go to a bar and chat up women and they all got dissed. have they never HEARD of the internet? Still: liking this. Looking forward to the makeovers.

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