Wednesday 18 January 2012

Celebrity Big Brother 2012: Eviction and live feed (my hands hurt)

Brian looks like he's got his old Easyjet uniform on tonight. Why would voting be neck and neck? What reason is there to keep Georgia around? If you really like her, do her a favour and save her from the Kirk flames.
Frankie looks worse than Denise first thing in the morning. Good to see they're treating Frankie well on his birthday. Maybe they'll give him a coke float later.
Georgia: 'I've made lots of friends.' I don't think that feeling is mutual. Michael: 'I like to be there at the finish.' Really? I like to slip off unnoticed about 1am.
'Affectionate' is not the word I'd use to describe Frankie and Kirk. Potential rape statistics is more like it.
I can't work out what is going on between Denise and Michael. If you have any clues, let me know.
I like them forcing Kirk to admit who he nominated. The boat of betrayal. Kirk 'Big Brother begins now!' I've heard him say that about 50 times already. The way he deals with people is some passive aggressive bullshit. He's in the wrong, so he starts on everyone.
Nicola: 'it's not worth it!' I bet she's said that many times outside nightclubs.
I HATE the way Kirk talks to people, he's a proper scumbag. Sonia's like his fucking moll. Does she really like men who behave like that? I love the twins barking at him. I want them on my side in an argument.
Twins going on about being gorgeous: check!
How old is Frankie anyway, 15? His ice sculpture was quite cool. Kings of Leon! There goes your cool points. Sex is on Fire always makes me think of having cystitis. Big Brother doesn't do alternative culture well, does it? It's much safer with The Saturdays.
Uh oh, ding dong! Denise vs Michael again. How much has she had to drink? Uh oh, she's talking to herself. Has she been on the spirits? Denise is like someone crying on the stairs at a party. Michael didn't DO ANYTHING! She's actually unhinged. I think she's in love with him.
Check out those leopard print trousers Gareth's got on!
Denise: 'Michael changes with a drink.' Fucking hell. The hypocrisy. The twins know the score. They've summed it up perfectly.
Denise stripping off! I hate it when women feel they have to take their top off to have a good time. It's worse when they're middle aged. Oh my god, you proper saw everything! Worse is Nicola pretending to be a friend. She isn't.
Michael: 'it's horrifying.' At least Frankie got to be in the hot tub with a topless girl on his birthday. Just not the way he imagined.
Georgia's out! She looks really good, if a little orange. Nice dress. Yeah Georgia go and get your nose fixed, you're hideous. Fucking hell, I'd swap. She's not just a pretty face, she's got a good body, too.
I'm not surprised Georgia is relieved to be out. Everyone hated her or was jealous of her in that house. Conversate-gate. Even Romeo didn't like Georgia, even though he's equally as boring as her.
Questions! Georgia is pointless. Beautiful, but pointless. I'd hate it if people said there was nothing about me. But the truth is, when you look like that, you don't need a personality.
I really want Georgia to say something really nasty about Kirk! Go on, say he's an impotent little shit. Say he stinks. Say he's got a face like a Boglin.
I think they interviewed Georgia for about ten seconds. Never mind. Yay, she backed the twins FTW. I'd like to see them win it. But can they?
Ooh, face to face nominations on the live feed! I'd better keep blogging, then! Fucking hell, is my work here never done? The twins: 'you're lying right now!' I love their turn of phrase.
Nicola looked nervous hearing about the live noms. Hasn't got the balls to nominate the twins to their faces, that's why. It's good because people will go for the easy option in this voting.
The twins demanding champagne before they nominate. Nice. I'd nominate Kirk and Nicola I think, but it's hard because I hate Natalie so much.
Oh no, Michael putting himself up as the stooge. I knew that would happen. Gareth's slightly aggressive pep talk! I'd nominate him, see how he likes that.
Nicola's biting her nails! But who's doing controller's leg? Why have they got to write it on blackboards? This is some good live feed. I hope Big Brother eliminates the soft voting and makes them give real reasons.
Nicola started writing IMMEDIATELY. She's obviously gunning for someone.
Frankie stop breaking the rules! Put him up. LOL he nommed Sonia.
Oh god, I hope it's not the twins vs Michael. That would be awful. I'm really worried that's going to happen.
Yay, the twins nominated Kirk and Natalie. Perfect.
Michael: 'I cannot stand another minute in this house with Denise, she's emotionally disturbed.' True.
Romeo voted for 'Franky' for being rude about women. Bless.
They said they have to take your first nomination, and Frankie's crossed his out! Put him up. Michael vs the twins is not an acceptable scenario. We know you wanted Natalie out!
Nicola is doing a noms cry. This sucks, it's going to be all 'baddies' if the twins or Michael go.
Now we wait whilst the BB producers try and fix it. They'd better, anyway. The twins didn't 'isolate themselves with Georgia'. They just liked Georgia.
Yay, they have fixed it. I wish it was a vote to evict. I'd evict Kirk. Vote to save the twins! And Michael! it's almost impossible to say who would would get the least votes in vote to save amongst that shower. I HATE that Gareth. He's so sanctimonious, and I don't really think he's got a leg to stand on.
Is Frankie going to have a fag now? Is he going to get kicked out of BB, too? It's illegal to smoke indoors in a workplace and he got caught out on the live feed! They'll get fined for that.
Maybe Denise would go in a vote to save? Would anyone bother with her. Why doesn't she go somewhere private and cry? Oh, cos she wants everyone to watch her.
Can't wait an hour for a fag... you never been on a plane before, Frankie?
Kirk: 'open the door so I can get my jumper or I'll boot it through.' Charmed, I'm sure.
Yay, Michael's getting pissy with Natalie on the live feed about being 'diplomatic'. Natalie doesn't like to be 'two-faced'.
I still don't get why everyone takes pity on Denise. She's brought the whole situation on herself. Natalie and Denise are like mother and daughter, they're such a self-rightous pair of arseholes.
The trouble with Romeo is he's SUCH a fence-sitter. He's a nice guy, but he's so fucking boring I could cry.
God I'm really bored now, I need something to eat. And just as they're digging into the wine, too. I hope you waited up for me. Save the Americans. The UK celebs aint worth shit. Night!

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I have never read a more accurate analysis. I salute you!

lightupvirginmary said...

Thank you so much! :)