Ok I basically just snuck out of the seminar I was in 15 mins early so I'm in time for the first eviction! I'm going to get the fucking sack! But all I was thinking about was Big Brother, anyway. Fucking hell, man. My career is going down the toilet. And for what?
A lot of things are wrong with this situation. I can't turn the telly up loud enough in this hotel room. The telly is really tiny. The contrast is buggered. I can't move my netbook because there's no wireless connection and the cable is too short. Oh, and twins just got evicted. I'm going to get the sack and it's just to see my winners evicted NOW. Not happy.
This is because I didn't vote today, isn't it? I was the only one keeping them alive! This is total turkey monkey. I'm all on edge and sad. WHY! Whhhhhhhhhhyyyyy?
Jesus, look at three of your final four! Denise, Frankie, Gareth... are you proud of yourselves? I hate it when Big Brother doesn't go my way. Generally, it goes my way. My hopes went up big time when Kirk and Natalie were shown the door, which is why I think this hurts so much.
Has Brian got loads of make up on or is the contrast on my TV completely fugged? Someone please shoot the morons shouting 'off'. It's making me REALLY angry. I am ashamed of my country.
I'm surprised the twins are cool with them showing pantsgate. I hate the way they're being interviewed. I love the fact they're not backing down. This is depressing viewing because of the crowd. Brian needs a cattle prod. I like the fact the twins said they became closer. They don't need anyone else. When you share the same womb, and the same bed with Hef, some idiots in tracksuits calling you slag don't really matter. You're determined!
Please, please, public pile your money on Michael. I don't think I can watch this otherwise. Oh God. I feel like crying. Is this normal? I like that split screen but this result is whack. Michael is OUT!
I can't stand Denise, Frankie or Gareth. There's never EVER been a final three I hated. Never.
I'm really glad I didn't leave my seminar just now (ie when I was supposed to) and come out to Michael and the twins being gone or I would probably have slit my wrists in the bath.
Honestly, I have had such a stressful day. Am I out of touch? I'm out of touch, aren't I? I'm GLADLY out of touch, though.
I've never felt so depressed about a final ever. This is so rubbish. I've got an en-suite bath. I'm going to have a bath during Gareth's non-interview. I honestly don't care who wins. Denise wins: vindication for being an alcoholic mess. Frankie wins: vindication for being a sexist div. Gareth wins: a victory for fencesitting. Seriously, how to choose between them? OK, I'm going to. FRANKIE TO WIN. There. I'd rather a sexist idiot won it than a drunken old mess or a boring nothingy non-celebrity.
Michael's interview was criminally short. He's a funny man, a real character, the closest thing to a celebrity we had in there, and they chose DENISE over him.
I have a 12 hour day tomorrow. I've not had a drink. There's nothing for me to eat here, like not one thing. The LEAST you could have done is thrown me a BB crumb.
I'm THRILLED Gareth is out next. At least a 'controversial' character will win now, rather than someone's ugly dad.
I bet ratings dropped dramatically after Michael's interview. My only friends on Facebook still watching it turned over.
Well done, Gareth. The most interesting thing you did in the house was dress up as a bit of sushi. Aw, he loves his mum. They could use Gareth's 'best bits' as an insomnia cure.
Normally at this point in a BB final my hearts pounding and I'm getting to jump around the room. As it is, I'm planning what I'm going to have for breakfast tomorrow.
Digital Spy's BB forum has also been down pretty much all night! So I don't even have anyone to complain to!
I'm probably less pleased about the prospect of Denise winning than I was about Ulrika winning. At least Ulrika didn't sexually assault or persistently harrass someone.
Does Denise get a trowel instead of a sponge with her foundation? She looks like she's come as a ventriloquist's dummy. I don't think Frankie should be allowed to wear sunglasses on eviction night.
I feel nothing about Denise winning. Nothing! I don't feel sad, angry, happy, any emotion I want to feel about my Big Brother winner.
I can't hear Frankie, is his mic fucked? Along with Digital Spy, and the general public's collective brain? Oh well, nevermind, I doubt if he has anything of interest to say. I've seen it all before anyway: birds, shagging, Danny Dyer. That's the lump sum of his personality.
And so people I actually like on Twitter are going 'yesssssss' about Denise winning, and I'm thinking, why? She's 50 odd, acts like she's 17, gets her boobs out, oversteps personal boundaries, hounds people trying to have five minutes on their own, gets annoyed when people aren't endlessly fascinated with her showbiz tales, and then cries for sympathy. Wow, what a winner. I'm really proud right now.
My friend JOTV just said 'Denise is a laugh' but in my opinion Denise is a laugh like David Brent is a laugh, she's someone to be laughed AT, not with. I find her quite tragic. I thought she'd come out of the house and take a good hard look at her behaviour. Instead, she's been REWARDED for being an old soak. It's topsy-turvy! Normally at the end of a series, you get some sort of vindication or sense of satisfaction. This just feels like a punch in the face.
Yeah go have a drink, Denise. And when Denise dies of liver cancer in five years time, let's just remember those laughs. You could have stopped that. You could have put her in rehab. You could have saved her!
I think the thing that offends me most about Denise is really, she's just someone's mum, which is fine, but surely our reality TV winners should be something more than that. She's just like someone you work with who gets on your nerves a bit. What has she done to win? Really? She's just everything I don't like in a person; lewd, contrived, desperate for people to like her. It's just the exact opposite of what I want in a winner.
Maybe I just outgrew Big Brother? I read Just 17 for about five years longer than I should have. I read NME for about five years longer than I should have. Maybe it's time to pack those childish things away and start watching Strictly.
Ha! No, it's just time for the British public to go read a book or go on a course and stop worshipping MORONS.
Night, and thanks for reading. Love you really.
Showing posts with label the twins. Show all posts
Showing posts with label the twins. Show all posts
Friday, 27 January 2012
Thursday, 26 January 2012
Celebrity Big Brother 2012: I bet they don't have peas in America
Rather a sad end to Big Brother for me as I'm watching this episode alone and I'm going on a three day conference starting tomorrow, so I don't know if I'm even going to SEE Big Brother, let alone get to blog it. It's really bad timing. I'm taking my netbook with me, so I'll do my best to hook it up somehow, and watch it, even if it's the dead of night. But if there's no Belkin I'm screwed. And if I don't see it, it's HARD trying to avoid the result all weekend, even when you're stranded in a conference centre in the West Midlands. I remember trying to avoid finding out Pete had won that year, and having to close my eyes all the way home on the tube from Reading Festival. Should have just stayed home and watched BB. Plus, if I don't see it on Friday in the early hours, by the time I write my blog on Sunday, no one will give a damn! I've got to wrap it up though. It's my duty. I'll do my best, OK? Wish me luck.
Anyway, let's get onto Denise's persecution complex. Nah, even I can't be bothered.
Is Frankie deliberately not getting the joke about 'doing lines'? Poor lamb. Does everyone love Frankie now? I don't. I still think he's a sexist little turd. But he's 18. Even I was an idiot at 18. Even you were! I don't think my hair was quite that bad, though.
All Nicola's dresses look the same. But every single one she tried on was nicer than the one she did choose! I don't mind Nicola, though. I like her just cos everyone else hates her.
I love this game they're playing, it's like Outburst. We always play that round my friend Adam's house but he's played it about 7 billion times and knows all the answers. The housemates seem to be spectacularly bad at this task. See, this is why Adam needs to go in the Big Brother house instead. Michael: 'Imagine! A night without trout.' He's always got the one-liners. Nicola's mad with Frankie. Whoops, I forgot to care, each side is so morally corrupt.
Frankie and Michael comparing the twins' looks in the hot tub. Chivalrous!
Denise is feeling old! Yeah, have a calculated cry in the Diary Room, that might get a few votes. Hey, why not get your boobs out, that might cheer no one up?
I like Romeo saying 'it was all on top' because my boyfriend says that. He also says, 'under the cosh', which I enjoy.
Michael was a little mean when he was saying he'd rather have sex with Gareth than Denise. Fair comment, though. Personally, I'd rather have sex with Michael than either of them.
The myth of Denise's 'own talkshow' in the UK continues! Please show them an episode of Loose Women and burst that bubble! I bet Michael will Youtube it in the hotel tomorrow night. He's going to get a surprise.
Michael and the twins are obsessed with winning, but that's just the way Americans are made, you can't resent them for it.
Interesting to see the twins scared when Nicola got booed. If they showed their vulnerability, it might do them a favour, although I prefer them emotionless. I liked them reassuring themselves that 'Frankie got booed, too'.
I thought it was interesting on BOTS when Romeo said he wanted people to see him how he really is, not how he was in So Solid Crew, and I think he achieved that. Who could have a bad word to say about him? Except that guy he stabbed, obv. Luckily, if you're a man and you stab someone (allegedly) or rape them (Tyson) or punch them (Brown, Gazza, et al) you get a second chance (let's laugh at that hilarious rapist in The Hangover 2!). If you're a woman, you barely get a first chance. If you're a good looking woman, a woman with a brain, a woman with an opinion, a woman who's funny, a woman who has sex (!) or a woman who likes a bit of an argument... God help you, we will stamp on you and we will boo our little lungs out to put you back in your place! But hey, that's the patriarchy. We're used to it.
LOL to Michael and the twins saying they don't care about winning! Hilarious. Denise's 'die hard fans'... who ARE they?! Who has actually clicked on her face and voted for her? I doubt if even Carol McGiffin has stopped shagging her toyboy for two seconds to bother (and why would she?!)
Denise stunned by the twins confidence/ arrogance. Gareth: 'I'm upset the twins want to win.' I thought you were a SPORTSMAN? Oooh, Denise and Gareth really want to win, too, don't they? Interesting. They've got the knives out, they're just less obvious, an unfortunately, it fools people.
Michael's roots are showing! Time for a touch up. I feel like Frankie's had that same jumper on for about a week now.
I'm loving the twins calling themselves 'humble'. What's the opposite of humble? It's true what they said about people dismissing them as blonde bimbos at first though, because even I, feminist nag extraordinaire, did the same. Because 99% of the time the glamour models in the house have been people like Orlaith, Imogen, Georgia; empty vessels with perky boobs and a lobotomy. So I apologise for judging the twins on that previous bad experience. But blame the Big Brother producers.
OMG - Frankie, naked! Do people really find him sexy? He looks like he's already got a beer belly to me. Aren't indie boys meant to be all cheekbones and ribs? That's how I like my indie boys.
Anyway, I'll miss this lot tomorrow. And I'll miss you lot, too. People actually seem to be reading my blog at the moment - weird. I'll try and fill the gap until we meet to slag off strangers again.
Good luck for the final. Save the Yanks! Vote for the twins and give that baying, thick, sexist, ugly mob something to really boo about. I'm counting on you!
Anyway, let's get onto Denise's persecution complex. Nah, even I can't be bothered.
Is Frankie deliberately not getting the joke about 'doing lines'? Poor lamb. Does everyone love Frankie now? I don't. I still think he's a sexist little turd. But he's 18. Even I was an idiot at 18. Even you were! I don't think my hair was quite that bad, though.
All Nicola's dresses look the same. But every single one she tried on was nicer than the one she did choose! I don't mind Nicola, though. I like her just cos everyone else hates her.
I love this game they're playing, it's like Outburst. We always play that round my friend Adam's house but he's played it about 7 billion times and knows all the answers. The housemates seem to be spectacularly bad at this task. See, this is why Adam needs to go in the Big Brother house instead. Michael: 'Imagine! A night without trout.' He's always got the one-liners. Nicola's mad with Frankie. Whoops, I forgot to care, each side is so morally corrupt.
Frankie and Michael comparing the twins' looks in the hot tub. Chivalrous!
Denise is feeling old! Yeah, have a calculated cry in the Diary Room, that might get a few votes. Hey, why not get your boobs out, that might cheer no one up?
I like Romeo saying 'it was all on top' because my boyfriend says that. He also says, 'under the cosh', which I enjoy.
Michael was a little mean when he was saying he'd rather have sex with Gareth than Denise. Fair comment, though. Personally, I'd rather have sex with Michael than either of them.
The myth of Denise's 'own talkshow' in the UK continues! Please show them an episode of Loose Women and burst that bubble! I bet Michael will Youtube it in the hotel tomorrow night. He's going to get a surprise.
Michael and the twins are obsessed with winning, but that's just the way Americans are made, you can't resent them for it.
Interesting to see the twins scared when Nicola got booed. If they showed their vulnerability, it might do them a favour, although I prefer them emotionless. I liked them reassuring themselves that 'Frankie got booed, too'.
I thought it was interesting on BOTS when Romeo said he wanted people to see him how he really is, not how he was in So Solid Crew, and I think he achieved that. Who could have a bad word to say about him? Except that guy he stabbed, obv. Luckily, if you're a man and you stab someone (allegedly) or rape them (Tyson) or punch them (Brown, Gazza, et al) you get a second chance (let's laugh at that hilarious rapist in The Hangover 2!). If you're a woman, you barely get a first chance. If you're a good looking woman, a woman with a brain, a woman with an opinion, a woman who's funny, a woman who has sex (!) or a woman who likes a bit of an argument... God help you, we will stamp on you and we will boo our little lungs out to put you back in your place! But hey, that's the patriarchy. We're used to it.
LOL to Michael and the twins saying they don't care about winning! Hilarious. Denise's 'die hard fans'... who ARE they?! Who has actually clicked on her face and voted for her? I doubt if even Carol McGiffin has stopped shagging her toyboy for two seconds to bother (and why would she?!)
Denise stunned by the twins confidence/ arrogance. Gareth: 'I'm upset the twins want to win.' I thought you were a SPORTSMAN? Oooh, Denise and Gareth really want to win, too, don't they? Interesting. They've got the knives out, they're just less obvious, an unfortunately, it fools people.
Michael's roots are showing! Time for a touch up. I feel like Frankie's had that same jumper on for about a week now.
I'm loving the twins calling themselves 'humble'. What's the opposite of humble? It's true what they said about people dismissing them as blonde bimbos at first though, because even I, feminist nag extraordinaire, did the same. Because 99% of the time the glamour models in the house have been people like Orlaith, Imogen, Georgia; empty vessels with perky boobs and a lobotomy. So I apologise for judging the twins on that previous bad experience. But blame the Big Brother producers.
OMG - Frankie, naked! Do people really find him sexy? He looks like he's already got a beer belly to me. Aren't indie boys meant to be all cheekbones and ribs? That's how I like my indie boys.
Anyway, I'll miss this lot tomorrow. And I'll miss you lot, too. People actually seem to be reading my blog at the moment - weird. I'll try and fill the gap until we meet to slag off strangers again.
Good luck for the final. Save the Yanks! Vote for the twins and give that baying, thick, sexist, ugly mob something to really boo about. I'm counting on you!
Wednesday, 27 June 2007
Big Brother 8: Don't Piss on my Patch
See, I go along liking Ziggy and then he says things like this. Sigh.
The age talk continues. 'I'm older than you!' 'But I've lived five more years...' 'I'm twice your age..' FUCK OFF. Stop talking about it! It's stupid! Honestly, next it will be 'I'm 26 and three quarters!' Zip it, Zigsy.
Not much to say about BB tonight: there is something strangely unwritable about the characters at the moment. The fight was very funny, first Charley vs the young lovers, 'You're a mug!' then Charley vs Billi which was particularly good. 'Model? You're a model for the blind! You fucking div!' Brilliant. Shifty eyed Billi couldn't quite compete with the mega trap calling her 'a fucking bitch'. One thing's for sure, Charley doesn't need a man to defend her honour. Even Gerry admitted he was scared of her! Ha. Love it. I do like a good old barney. Liam the 100K man, meanwhile, dredged the pool. What a deserving trouper.
They totally deserved to live on slop after welching on the sleep task. Brian's diatribe in the diary room was very funny- I like laughing at the yokel. Him pushing the twins round in the garden- you're looking round for the babysitter, aren't you? It's frightening that these people can vote or breed. It's frightening that these people exist. But it's alright. They're in a little box, safe (for now).
The age talk continues. 'I'm older than you!' 'But I've lived five more years...' 'I'm twice your age..' FUCK OFF. Stop talking about it! It's stupid! Honestly, next it will be 'I'm 26 and three quarters!' Zip it, Zigsy.
Not much to say about BB tonight: there is something strangely unwritable about the characters at the moment. The fight was very funny, first Charley vs the young lovers, 'You're a mug!' then Charley vs Billi which was particularly good. 'Model? You're a model for the blind! You fucking div!' Brilliant. Shifty eyed Billi couldn't quite compete with the mega trap calling her 'a fucking bitch'. One thing's for sure, Charley doesn't need a man to defend her honour. Even Gerry admitted he was scared of her! Ha. Love it. I do like a good old barney. Liam the 100K man, meanwhile, dredged the pool. What a deserving trouper.
They totally deserved to live on slop after welching on the sleep task. Brian's diatribe in the diary room was very funny- I like laughing at the yokel. Him pushing the twins round in the garden- you're looking round for the babysitter, aren't you? It's frightening that these people can vote or breed. It's frightening that these people exist. But it's alright. They're in a little box, safe (for now).
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