How do they get away with it? The vote fixing that is. The 'pure' housemates, chosen by the pointless Gillian McKeith get to nominate. How are GC and her lapdog Danniella, chronic chainsmokers, PURE in any way? GC was exempt from the task for 'feeling nauseous'? The only task this bitch has done is the one where she got immunity. Funny, that. Gillian McKeith was a waste of airtime and whatever she got paid. Honestly, fuck these I'm a Celebrity people.
I have no idea why Big Brother wanted Tiffany, Stephanie and Jeremy on the block, while Darren Day, Danniella and GC just sit there smoking and whining and pretending they're decent people when we all know they're morally bankrupt. It was so annoying, as I like all three people who were up. I voted to save Steph though, as it's my aim in life to see her outlast Gemma Collins. At least Stephanie admits her sins.
I was sorry to see Jeremy go. I thought Emma treated him despicably, overcompensating for her Hazel/Daley fuck up of years' past by pretending she cares about sexism when we all know she's a raving misogynist. Jeremy is single, he can essentially do what he likes. I do believe he fell in love. I dread to think what Stephanie will face when she's evicted. That crowd are just looking for a witch to burn and she's the one. I have this faint hope in my heart that she could win it, just because I'd love to see the uproar, both in and out of the house. Helen won, so anything's possible.
I have more to say on all of that, and tried to last night with a podcast that was sabotaged by a live mouse being dumped in my living room by my cat. Whether the beginning of that ever sees the light of day, I'll let you know. The mouse, unbelievably, is still at large. *eek*
So on with tonight's show. God, is the phone task still going on? I hate two day tasks. Yawn.
I also don't give a fuck if Steremy shagged or not, but I like the fact it annoyed the hags so much. I include Darren in the hags, FYI.
OMg Jez wiggling his weiner at Steph. Now I'm going to have to delete another 10 people off Twitter for calling Steph a slag, even though it's Jeremy waving his willy around.
What is the POINT in Scotty T, does anyone know? Also, who is the other Scotty? There was Luke S and Luke A, but where is Scotty A, B or C? And can we swap for that one?
I watched the extended cut of Steph's call earlier and it was actually really moving. The fact she was so desperate to hear he her dad proud of her was cute. Her dad was soooo nice. I wish I had a nice dad. 'You hold your head up high.' Aw. Fuck Danniella, John. Steph is eating up the call time. 'Concentrate on your journey.' That's fighting talk. 'Retain your dignity' means 'don't fuck Jeremy' right? Too late, I think. He's not seen Sam for a while, ha. I have, plugging his wares on Twitter. I like the fact they all leave the room when they have the calls. Calls from home are better than letters from home.
Danniella: 'Of course her dad's proud of her.' *sour* What a bitch. I actually hate her more than GC now, which I didn't think was possible.
Big Brother zooming in on Jeremy and Stephanie getting it on before throwing them to the wolves. Mock horrified much.
Danniella: 'Scotty hasn't had a phonecall.' He has, it was just so insignificant, no one remembers it. It was just one of his feral co-stars barking down the line.
Danniella's getting her call. I'm so happy for her, not. Bet she's pleased her friend mentioned Tiffany, ha. 'He's like JLo.' Er, who the fuck is it?
Scotty couldn't wait to get Megan off the phone. Can't blame him.
Hold on, why is John 'I didn't cry at my father's funeral' getting another call? And bawling! Turncoat.
Jeremy is deffo finger banging Steph! I like the way they've cut all the phonecalls with the sex. It's dramatic, ha. What about the dignity though? 'Me dad!' Oh, fuck dignity. She knows she's not getting back with Sam now.
Gemma ordering her mum around and hanging up on her. 'You can walk? Sort me out a fucking party!' Ok then.
Steph is wondering how to speak to Sam. I don't think you'll have to worry about that. Jeremy pretending to be respectful: 'We should wait a while.' What about the magazine deals? The magazine deals wait for no one. Jeremy: 'We're gonna have amazing sex.' I'm sure. But he's happy to wait, OK? He can't even wait until they get out of the house!
I like Tiffany's reaction when she was saved, it seemed very genuine. I can't work out if Steph's orange dress is an eek or a chic. Maybe it's a cheek.
'It's made Danniella's day' that Tiffany is staying (subtext: Steph or Jeremy are going).
Steph and Jeremy saying their goodbyes in the loo. Quite apt. I still don't get this phonebox thing. I thought it was quite sad when he went. I'm so glad it wasn't her though. Fuck the other housemates.
Danniella: 'You get way you get when you behave a certain way.' Yeah like no septum. She's SMILING. Evil cow. How can she BE SO JUDGEMENTAL! How can you be 42, have been through all that, and throw around the word 'slag' and JUDGE SO MUCH? And allegedly she's a Christian? FFS. Hypocrite.
Danniella: 'She deserves every boo she gets and more.' So much for her 'trying to help' Steph as people were bleating to me on Twitter this week. Bet you I don't hear from them again. She's just HORRIBLE. I'm glad Scotty T was left without his playmate and it was his own doing for nominating Steph. Haha! Scotty T comforting Steph, ugh. Steph doesn't have to explain herself to that mutt Scotty T. He doesn't understand love. He just wants to know when his next walkies is.
What's Danniella carping about. 'It should never have been him.' Didn't she nominate him?
Danniella is in no position to judge ANYONE! Even my mum just texted to say Danniella is a 'trouble stirring bitch' and just jealous.
Darren even said the thing about Jeremy's locket aggressively. Why is everyone being so mean to Steph? It's so annoying. This lot are so fucking sanctimonious. At least Steph is being real unlike Darren 'I don't fantasise' Day. I'm tired of everyone being the voice of reason, being the morality police. Put a sock in it. We're trying to watch an entertaining programme here.
Danniella is obsessed with being 'mugged off.' I'd just settle for 'mugged.'
I'm glad to see Tiffany happy, she deserves it for being one of the only fun housemates in there. She's annoyed she didn't get to comfort Jeremy in his hour of need - I honestly don't think Jeremy would have been up for it. He's cuntstruck.
So we approach the last week. What pointless twist are they going to throw in to ensure Scotty MTV T wins? Watch this space! We get the winners we deserve. Unfortunately.
Showing posts with label gemma collins. Show all posts
Showing posts with label gemma collins. Show all posts
Saturday, 30 January 2016
Monday, 25 January 2016
Celebrity Big Brother 2016: The masturbate ball
The show started off slow tonight but then built up to a great climax... ahem. Apologies in advance, there's more jokes like that to come.
So Stephanie wins a facial and massage with the water being off but says no... then yes. So she's selfish, but not as selfish as GC, who didn't think twice.
So Gemma is worried she's 35 and people will think she's weird cos she;s not got kids. No they think you're weird because you're horrible. They understand why you've not got kids because no one in their right mind would sleep with you. I'm 35 and I'd rather die than have kids. John is right, if you really want kids, you go and do it. People who wait for their eggs to dry up need to get on it at our age, and not leave it too late, if that's what they want.
GC s doing reiki on Dal: 'You've got to picture a toilet going out of your colon.' Say what? 'Send love to your colon and imagine poo going down'. Er, or just use the loo like a normal person. The Darren goes for a shit and Gemma walks in on him. CONVENIENT. Big Brother is obsessed with scat.
Scotty T and Christopher moralising about Steremy. Ugh. Mind your own business. Jeremy: 'I can't help the way I feel about her.' Just leave the man alone. I never realised men like him actually talked about women in a nice way. I thought they were more like Scotty T: animals.
Jeremy kissing Stephanie's neck in bed, while Scotty looks down his nose like Norris off Corrie. Stephanie has got a strong eyebrow game. Not so good at managing her personal space.
Tiffany is waiting for someone to cross her so she can start a fight. 'I came here to fight cos that's what I like doing.' I hear you. 'No one is giving me beef.' Imagine Christopher or Darren in the DR saying this stuff.
Steph is worried Sam's not going to be there when she gets out. Steph, come on, now. 'Everything was perfect before this.' Well you're the one who fucked it up. Take some responsibility. The 'house' didn't do it.
I like the fact they're making them do a task which involves some level of skill, even though it's a puking task. They have to drink gross things and guess the ingredients.
I thought it was rigged cos Americans don't eat spam but then I got told on Twitter they invented it or something. Whatever, it's gross.
What's the point in holding your nose when you drink it cos then you can't taste the ingredients?
Tiffany is not happy. I couldn't drink that either.
So Darren is the last person immune. I'd say that's curtains for Danniella or Maloney on Tues. Or could Scotty T go? I always hear he could win it, but why? What's he actually done of any interest?
Ha, so the immune housemates get to uninvite people from the party. Gemma uninvited Chris, Steph did Tiffany and Darren uninvited Danniella. The alienation of Tiffany continues unabated. At least Gemma is trying to include her.
At least they gave the housemates they excluded from the party a drink, and a good job too, or the rest of the episode would have been a wrap. Tiffany is drinking a bottle of prosecco to herself, so she's going to get shitfaced. I've been there.
Danniella, 'Tiffany should just gatecrash the party.' A good plan (especially with Big Brother's complete lack of discipline) but Tiffany has come up with a better one, and is busy frigging herself off drunk in the toilet. Fair play! That will chill her out a bit. Good on her, she is so unapologetically her. I love it. I liked her face when walked out of the loo. I thought I hadn't seen a female housemate masturbate since Sam in the box, but someone reminded me about Kinga. I can't remember who came first now. Boom boom! (sorry)
Female masturbation is something so ignored that it's great to see it even MENTIONED now and again, let alone carried out, if only by implication.
Sexual antics warning coming up, AFTER Tiffany has wanked off. Ha. I suppose that was behind a toilet door.
What the fuck are John and GC doing in the loo? Ho come GC is being bearable tonight? It's awful! I live to hate her. I love the fact she's had no airtime though. She was becoming unwatchable.
I'm glad the boys are including Tiffany now. Those masks give the whole show a bit of an orgy vibe.
Truth or dare! Now Tiffany is finally enjoying herself! A bottle of prosecco, a wank and two snogs (well, four). That's a decent night by anyone's standards. And good for Jeremy - a great mindgame to play on Steph. Let's see how she likes the tables being turned.
Tiffany thinks Scotty would be great at 'eating pussy.' She said 'Jez is a cheeseburger but Scotty's the Big Mac.' Zing! Nice to see them let their hair (and their pants) down.
OMG! Tiffany asked Darren Day if he'd fantasised about cheating on his wife. She's kicking it up a notch! He paused for WAY too long, then said he 'swore on his kids lives he hadn't.' You're allowed to fantasise, Darren. So you're telling me he doesn't look at porn? He's trying too hard to be squeaky clean. I'm not buying it. I prefer Tiffany just being like 'RARRGHHHHH!'
I'm not sure why John is saying 'pull my nightie down when you've finished' or even who to, but it's freaking me out.
I love Scotty T motorboating and snogging Tiffany. Megan who? She must be SEETHING.
Jeremy and Scotty crawling round at Tiffany's feet and her giggling. This is more like it! The mantub could become the gangbang tub!
Tiffany and Scotty in the shower was gold. Tiffany would definitely fuck him. Dear God, her looking at Scotty's dick in the shower, did she grab it, too?! 'It's BIG! That shit would blow my back out. I want to bite it.' OMG! I am speechless. I think Megan's TV just went over.
Uh oh, Jeremy confessing to Stephanie he kissed Tiffany. This is not gonna go well. Fuck this Jeremy and Steph shit, let's see Tiffany and Scotty, at least they're enjoying themselves.
Stephanie: 'I'm nothing to you anyway, we're just pals, you can do what you like.' OK then. Why have you got a face like a slapped arse then? Jeremy is playing her a good 'un.
Jeremy: 'You're allowed to play me like a fool when you've got a boyfriend and I'm not allowed to have a game with the lads.'
Steph: 'I've put so much on the line for you then the one time I'm ill you neck off with someone else.' What is this 'necking off'? She sounds like Austin from #bb17. So is she admitting she's dumped her boyfriend? No, she's STILL hedging her bets!
Jeremy is drunk and getting a bit bolshy. He's annoyed that she wants to marry her boyfriend. He's right though, it is one rule for her and another for him. I think he's right to try and force her hand. Which brings us back to Tiffany... hopefully the winner of CBB 2016. Fingers crossed Danniella will go tomorrow, if not, I'll happily say goodbye to Chris or even Scotty. Hopefully they won't spring any twist crap on us. And aren't more people going in? This could be interesting/shit. Watch this space.
So Stephanie wins a facial and massage with the water being off but says no... then yes. So she's selfish, but not as selfish as GC, who didn't think twice.
So Gemma is worried she's 35 and people will think she's weird cos she;s not got kids. No they think you're weird because you're horrible. They understand why you've not got kids because no one in their right mind would sleep with you. I'm 35 and I'd rather die than have kids. John is right, if you really want kids, you go and do it. People who wait for their eggs to dry up need to get on it at our age, and not leave it too late, if that's what they want.
GC s doing reiki on Dal: 'You've got to picture a toilet going out of your colon.' Say what? 'Send love to your colon and imagine poo going down'. Er, or just use the loo like a normal person. The Darren goes for a shit and Gemma walks in on him. CONVENIENT. Big Brother is obsessed with scat.
Scotty T and Christopher moralising about Steremy. Ugh. Mind your own business. Jeremy: 'I can't help the way I feel about her.' Just leave the man alone. I never realised men like him actually talked about women in a nice way. I thought they were more like Scotty T: animals.
Jeremy kissing Stephanie's neck in bed, while Scotty looks down his nose like Norris off Corrie. Stephanie has got a strong eyebrow game. Not so good at managing her personal space.
Tiffany is waiting for someone to cross her so she can start a fight. 'I came here to fight cos that's what I like doing.' I hear you. 'No one is giving me beef.' Imagine Christopher or Darren in the DR saying this stuff.
Steph is worried Sam's not going to be there when she gets out. Steph, come on, now. 'Everything was perfect before this.' Well you're the one who fucked it up. Take some responsibility. The 'house' didn't do it.
I like the fact they're making them do a task which involves some level of skill, even though it's a puking task. They have to drink gross things and guess the ingredients.
I thought it was rigged cos Americans don't eat spam but then I got told on Twitter they invented it or something. Whatever, it's gross.
What's the point in holding your nose when you drink it cos then you can't taste the ingredients?
Tiffany is not happy. I couldn't drink that either.
So Darren is the last person immune. I'd say that's curtains for Danniella or Maloney on Tues. Or could Scotty T go? I always hear he could win it, but why? What's he actually done of any interest?
Ha, so the immune housemates get to uninvite people from the party. Gemma uninvited Chris, Steph did Tiffany and Darren uninvited Danniella. The alienation of Tiffany continues unabated. At least Gemma is trying to include her.
At least they gave the housemates they excluded from the party a drink, and a good job too, or the rest of the episode would have been a wrap. Tiffany is drinking a bottle of prosecco to herself, so she's going to get shitfaced. I've been there.
Danniella, 'Tiffany should just gatecrash the party.' A good plan (especially with Big Brother's complete lack of discipline) but Tiffany has come up with a better one, and is busy frigging herself off drunk in the toilet. Fair play! That will chill her out a bit. Good on her, she is so unapologetically her. I love it. I liked her face when walked out of the loo. I thought I hadn't seen a female housemate masturbate since Sam in the box, but someone reminded me about Kinga. I can't remember who came first now. Boom boom! (sorry)
Female masturbation is something so ignored that it's great to see it even MENTIONED now and again, let alone carried out, if only by implication.
Sexual antics warning coming up, AFTER Tiffany has wanked off. Ha. I suppose that was behind a toilet door.
What the fuck are John and GC doing in the loo? Ho come GC is being bearable tonight? It's awful! I live to hate her. I love the fact she's had no airtime though. She was becoming unwatchable.
I'm glad the boys are including Tiffany now. Those masks give the whole show a bit of an orgy vibe.
Truth or dare! Now Tiffany is finally enjoying herself! A bottle of prosecco, a wank and two snogs (well, four). That's a decent night by anyone's standards. And good for Jeremy - a great mindgame to play on Steph. Let's see how she likes the tables being turned.
Tiffany thinks Scotty would be great at 'eating pussy.' She said 'Jez is a cheeseburger but Scotty's the Big Mac.' Zing! Nice to see them let their hair (and their pants) down.
OMG! Tiffany asked Darren Day if he'd fantasised about cheating on his wife. She's kicking it up a notch! He paused for WAY too long, then said he 'swore on his kids lives he hadn't.' You're allowed to fantasise, Darren. So you're telling me he doesn't look at porn? He's trying too hard to be squeaky clean. I'm not buying it. I prefer Tiffany just being like 'RARRGHHHHH!'
I'm not sure why John is saying 'pull my nightie down when you've finished' or even who to, but it's freaking me out.
I love Scotty T motorboating and snogging Tiffany. Megan who? She must be SEETHING.
Jeremy and Scotty crawling round at Tiffany's feet and her giggling. This is more like it! The mantub could become the gangbang tub!
Tiffany and Scotty in the shower was gold. Tiffany would definitely fuck him. Dear God, her looking at Scotty's dick in the shower, did she grab it, too?! 'It's BIG! That shit would blow my back out. I want to bite it.' OMG! I am speechless. I think Megan's TV just went over.
Uh oh, Jeremy confessing to Stephanie he kissed Tiffany. This is not gonna go well. Fuck this Jeremy and Steph shit, let's see Tiffany and Scotty, at least they're enjoying themselves.
Stephanie: 'I'm nothing to you anyway, we're just pals, you can do what you like.' OK then. Why have you got a face like a slapped arse then? Jeremy is playing her a good 'un.
Jeremy: 'You're allowed to play me like a fool when you've got a boyfriend and I'm not allowed to have a game with the lads.'
Steph: 'I've put so much on the line for you then the one time I'm ill you neck off with someone else.' What is this 'necking off'? She sounds like Austin from #bb17. So is she admitting she's dumped her boyfriend? No, she's STILL hedging her bets!
Jeremy is drunk and getting a bit bolshy. He's annoyed that she wants to marry her boyfriend. He's right though, it is one rule for her and another for him. I think he's right to try and force her hand. Which brings us back to Tiffany... hopefully the winner of CBB 2016. Fingers crossed Danniella will go tomorrow, if not, I'll happily say goodbye to Chris or even Scotty. Hopefully they won't spring any twist crap on us. And aren't more people going in? This could be interesting/shit. Watch this space.
Sunday, 24 January 2016
Celebrity Big Brother 2016: Big Brother, plz grow some balls
Shit, since I last wrote a blog THREE people have left! It's been a quieter week this week, and still we've lost three. As Emma said, it's lucky they put 16 in. CONVENIENT, you might say if you suspected certain people were on a contract.
So it's a sad goodbye to David Gest (RIP), a fuck you to Angie Bowie (in the paper today saying Bowie strangled her; thought she didn't want to talk to the press?) Apparently she gave up £200,000 to walk. She wasn't worth £200.
I was very pleased to see the housemate evicted was rat-on-the-beach Megan. God, can someone sort out her style, the Princess Anne hair and the Dallas make-up makes her look in her fifties. I was chuffed to see her go instead of a decent housemate like Tiffany or John. I was surprised to see so many people boohooing on Twitter about Megan leaving. She had no redeeming features, thick as fuck, psychotic and a borderline racist. Excuse me if I don't cry my eyes out. Oh, she did have one redeeming feature, I take it back. Her arse cheeks. Or is that two? Either way, see ya.
It's obvious GC was going to stay on eviction night because the idiot general public (t.m. Helen Wood) AND the producers seem to love her despite the fact she is literally blowing up their game by refusing to play it. So then they give her immunity. You can say she picked where to stand but one of the task team could pushed a gold OR white mask up, cos let's face it, the handles they were turning weren't operating the boxes. Jeremy pulled his off (oo-er) and it still popped up. That sentence didn't get any better, did it?
So I suppose the 'top story' apart from GC vs John is Stephanie and Jeremy. I admire Stephanie just because she's the only one standing up to Gemma. Christopher and Darren finally appeared to say a couple of negative things about Gemma, AFTER they heard her get booed. Steph's thrush battle yesterday was revolting in more ways than one. But what was more gross than pigeon shit knickers, or creaming your knickers over Jeremy and admitting it, or knickers being left on the table, or the gang up eyes (redux) is people on Twitter calling Steph a slag. And it's not just the people using that word, it's the whole tone of the self-appointed morality police. They're worse than Scotty T. Who does it actually affect that Steph is 'cheating' (if you can call it that) on her boyfriend on TV? Her boyfriend. How awful for him, etc. But is it affecting your life? No, you're being given content for a TV show you watch. You might not want to watch that; I don't particularly, either, I think it's played out. She's not going to dump her boyfriend and commit to Jeremy, she's keeping her options open and I DON'T BLAME HER. Jeremy could just as easily fuck off back to Ireland. She's got Big Brother Brain and Jeremy is her Big Brother Boyfriend. Her OWN boyfriend has surely dumped her by now. But I don't think Steph can see outside the situation like we can. I think she probably thinks she can patch it up. Maybe she can. And if she can, or she can't, what's it got to do with us? Of course we can comment on the show, and what she's doing and blah blah blah, that's what Twitter and blogs and pods are for. But take a look at yourself, and ask yourself, have you ever done anything wrong in your life? The fact is, the Twitter handwringers are just like GC when she saw Jeremy and Steph under the covers; pleased as fucking punch to have something to be outraged about. So do us all a favour, and get off your high horse (if you're on one). Otherwise, you're no better than John Partridge, ha.
Anyway, in other news I heard GC cut her finger and has been 'rushed to hospital'. Don't rush back. Is it wrong to hope she gets gangrene? She'll probably come back with the Sunday papers and a new wardrobe.
Tiffany has been doing SO WELL lately. Her bathroom convo with John on the live feed over knickergate was one of the weirdest and most compelling things I've seen. Two true gamers in action, hamming it up. Fuck, yes. I think John is great and he must stay to the end. He's so dramatic and totally fake, therefore a great housemate.
So who's writing the warning, cos we've had Highly Offensive, HIGHLY OFFENSIVE and now HIGHLY Offensive language. But which is worse?
Er, why the fuck is Gemma getting a blowdry? Typical selfish bitch move by her there. Why doesn't she just fuck off home if she wants a blowdry? I actually think I hate her more than any other person on Big Brother ever. Is that even possible? The levels of bile runneth over! I spend the entire episode FURIOUS. Can't be healthy. No wonder Chris and Darren are nervous wrecks.
Bossing the hairdresser around, argh! Hold on, is that the stripper from the other night? I note that was cut from the highlights, and not surprised as I thought it was borderline sexual assault. Plus who wants a stripper with a beard? This beard thing must end soon. It's already been going on ten years too long. BEARDS ARE DISGUSTING. SHAVE THEM OFF.
So it's not 'a proper Essex blowdry'. What does that entail, glittery hairspray and a magazine deal at the end of it? Yes, she's still fucking moaning. GC is getting the full Frankie Grande edit from the producers now. They must despise her because she's making them look a fool. She has no respect for Big Brother, won't do tasks, comes and goes as she pleases. Just get a fucking turnstile in and be done with it.
Stephanie informing Jeremy about her required after sex etiquette while holding his hand. Can we just call her relationship done and let them get on with it? Then I can actually enjoy the romance instead of it being a bit grubby. It makes me cringe when I see them together, not because I care, but because I know I'm going to have to unfollow another 20 people on Twitter calling her a slag. And they were people whose opinions I respected, people I liked. And that hurts my feelings.
So here it is, Gemma tried to peel a potato with the sort of knife that should probably be banned in Big Brother and cut her finger 'through to the bone'. Darren: 'That's quite a bit of claret.' Is that you, Danny Dyer? Bleed, bitch, bleed!
Dt Ottoman was in no rush. Let's hope she treats him better than she does her hairdresser. GC has gone to the hospital to get stitches. Imagine how relieved they must all feel. I wonder if we'll ever get to evict her and feel the same way?
I just missed the rules to the task but I guess I'll figure it out. Oh it's like 15 to 1. You answer a question and then knock someone out (not like that, although...). Scotty T thinks Darren might win the whole show. Danniella made Chris lose a life 'cos he's her friend'. Er...?
Tragic that Christopher didn't dare say Gemma was the drama queen of the house. What a fucking wet weekend. He nom-vommed her face to face! He'd been growing on me, too. I hate the words 'man up' but MAN UP has never been more apt in this case.
Scotty T targeting Steph again. With friends like him, who needs enemies? And still he'll win it.
GC threatening Danniella: 'Play it properly then.' Scary. She's like a one-woman mafia.
Gemma's face when Stephanie was being honest about what a cunt she is. Danniella sticking her oar in. What a bitch.
Danniella: 'I want a gift from my kids.' Who said it was that anyway? She's demented. I know she's having a bad day, but Jesus. I read on Twitter the prize was a facial. You can't just make up what prize you want. If you want to see a picture of your kids, go home. I hope your letter from home gets shredded, too.
So Danniella was cool to lose a life when it was Scotty, but not when it was Steph. 'And so you know it.' Gemma's face said she got whatever she wanted. Danniella stormed out the room.
GC (shouting): 'Stop it cos you're a very nasty girl!' Steph hadn't actually said a word. Then Gemma goes, 'She's mugging you off left right and centre' to Jeremy. Then she screams in the kitchen 'She don't let up!' Who? YOU! Steph was just playing the game, participating in the task, an alien concept to you, I know. Disappointed to see Tiffany go with them. She had a duff edit tonight.
Danniella: 'The bird's a fucking bully.' How has Steph bullied anyone? She's the one BEING BULLIED. And I don't use that word lightly, although I generally don't give a shit about that word (unlike slag). Which brings us to:
'You're a fucking slag, love!' Danniella screams, while out of earshot. Really brave. Well you're a washed-up dog. Then they bash out the fire exit and Gemma goes 'they either remove her or we're going.' Um... do you want an Uber or just get the bus?
I love the fact the task just went on after Gemma and Danniella flounced off. Jeremy and Steph are the last two standing and he threw it to her. That was actually a really sweet moment. Whatever you think of Steph, her relationship with Jeremy is real, unlike GC and Danniella's, which is rotten.
So Christopher can see that GC is fucking up Danniella's chances, but will he dare say it to anyone but Darren? The chainsmoking chickens in the corner! They should have a sign up in the corner saying 'Spines not required'. Christopher is right, GC is playing Danniella. That sums it up completely. I'd really warmed to Christopher after that jungle task, but I'm really fed up with him when he won't stand up and be counted. If he DOES, he could go deep.
The housemates are playing charades when the miserable cows re-enter. I'm shocked they don't even get a warning from Big Brother. They looked very cheerful in the DR. They are MUGGING OFF Big Brother (and us watching). Gemma doesn't mind going in a cage now. That claustrophobia clears up quickly, doesn't it?
Then they come back in and say sorry to Jeremy, but not Steph. It's just wrong. That felt horrible.
I'm really pleased Steph has immunity but less of the 22-year-old girl crap. She's right to feel aggrieved, though. She's not 'over thinking it'. She understands it completely. She gets it.
There was a bit with John getting involved (never!) and Tiffany summing it all up in the DR but that doesn't really need repeating.
Danniella then apologised. I do think Danniella is just a basketcase in with the wrong crowd. Her apology seemed genuine - I think she's just missing her kids, but no need to be sexist.
Gemma to Steph: 'Giwls have gotta stick togevver.' Ok then. Steph seems to be hinting she's done with her boyfriend now. About time. I wish she'd just say it outright.
Random moment of the night: Tiffany to Darren: 'You're such a force in here. You're so sexy and masculine.' A force! He's less than a drip. Darren thinks she's on a task but he's 'very flattered.' Tiffany thought he was 30! Hahaha. Darren: 'I'm happily married.' LOL. He's not trying to be a love rat in there, Tiffany. All I can think is Darren Day smells great or something. Women just fall at his feet. But in reality, he must smell like Rothmans.
Don't forget to listen to Big Brother Bile, it's going a bit stale now, but should be a fresh episode early next week: Bit on the snide
Cheers for reading. Goodnight!
So it's a sad goodbye to David Gest (RIP), a fuck you to Angie Bowie (in the paper today saying Bowie strangled her; thought she didn't want to talk to the press?) Apparently she gave up £200,000 to walk. She wasn't worth £200.
I was very pleased to see the housemate evicted was rat-on-the-beach Megan. God, can someone sort out her style, the Princess Anne hair and the Dallas make-up makes her look in her fifties. I was chuffed to see her go instead of a decent housemate like Tiffany or John. I was surprised to see so many people boohooing on Twitter about Megan leaving. She had no redeeming features, thick as fuck, psychotic and a borderline racist. Excuse me if I don't cry my eyes out. Oh, she did have one redeeming feature, I take it back. Her arse cheeks. Or is that two? Either way, see ya.
It's obvious GC was going to stay on eviction night because the idiot general public (t.m. Helen Wood) AND the producers seem to love her despite the fact she is literally blowing up their game by refusing to play it. So then they give her immunity. You can say she picked where to stand but one of the task team could pushed a gold OR white mask up, cos let's face it, the handles they were turning weren't operating the boxes. Jeremy pulled his off (oo-er) and it still popped up. That sentence didn't get any better, did it?
So I suppose the 'top story' apart from GC vs John is Stephanie and Jeremy. I admire Stephanie just because she's the only one standing up to Gemma. Christopher and Darren finally appeared to say a couple of negative things about Gemma, AFTER they heard her get booed. Steph's thrush battle yesterday was revolting in more ways than one. But what was more gross than pigeon shit knickers, or creaming your knickers over Jeremy and admitting it, or knickers being left on the table, or the gang up eyes (redux) is people on Twitter calling Steph a slag. And it's not just the people using that word, it's the whole tone of the self-appointed morality police. They're worse than Scotty T. Who does it actually affect that Steph is 'cheating' (if you can call it that) on her boyfriend on TV? Her boyfriend. How awful for him, etc. But is it affecting your life? No, you're being given content for a TV show you watch. You might not want to watch that; I don't particularly, either, I think it's played out. She's not going to dump her boyfriend and commit to Jeremy, she's keeping her options open and I DON'T BLAME HER. Jeremy could just as easily fuck off back to Ireland. She's got Big Brother Brain and Jeremy is her Big Brother Boyfriend. Her OWN boyfriend has surely dumped her by now. But I don't think Steph can see outside the situation like we can. I think she probably thinks she can patch it up. Maybe she can. And if she can, or she can't, what's it got to do with us? Of course we can comment on the show, and what she's doing and blah blah blah, that's what Twitter and blogs and pods are for. But take a look at yourself, and ask yourself, have you ever done anything wrong in your life? The fact is, the Twitter handwringers are just like GC when she saw Jeremy and Steph under the covers; pleased as fucking punch to have something to be outraged about. So do us all a favour, and get off your high horse (if you're on one). Otherwise, you're no better than John Partridge, ha.
Anyway, in other news I heard GC cut her finger and has been 'rushed to hospital'. Don't rush back. Is it wrong to hope she gets gangrene? She'll probably come back with the Sunday papers and a new wardrobe.
Tiffany has been doing SO WELL lately. Her bathroom convo with John on the live feed over knickergate was one of the weirdest and most compelling things I've seen. Two true gamers in action, hamming it up. Fuck, yes. I think John is great and he must stay to the end. He's so dramatic and totally fake, therefore a great housemate.
So who's writing the warning, cos we've had Highly Offensive, HIGHLY OFFENSIVE and now HIGHLY Offensive language. But which is worse?
Er, why the fuck is Gemma getting a blowdry? Typical selfish bitch move by her there. Why doesn't she just fuck off home if she wants a blowdry? I actually think I hate her more than any other person on Big Brother ever. Is that even possible? The levels of bile runneth over! I spend the entire episode FURIOUS. Can't be healthy. No wonder Chris and Darren are nervous wrecks.
Bossing the hairdresser around, argh! Hold on, is that the stripper from the other night? I note that was cut from the highlights, and not surprised as I thought it was borderline sexual assault. Plus who wants a stripper with a beard? This beard thing must end soon. It's already been going on ten years too long. BEARDS ARE DISGUSTING. SHAVE THEM OFF.
So it's not 'a proper Essex blowdry'. What does that entail, glittery hairspray and a magazine deal at the end of it? Yes, she's still fucking moaning. GC is getting the full Frankie Grande edit from the producers now. They must despise her because she's making them look a fool. She has no respect for Big Brother, won't do tasks, comes and goes as she pleases. Just get a fucking turnstile in and be done with it.
Stephanie informing Jeremy about her required after sex etiquette while holding his hand. Can we just call her relationship done and let them get on with it? Then I can actually enjoy the romance instead of it being a bit grubby. It makes me cringe when I see them together, not because I care, but because I know I'm going to have to unfollow another 20 people on Twitter calling her a slag. And they were people whose opinions I respected, people I liked. And that hurts my feelings.
So here it is, Gemma tried to peel a potato with the sort of knife that should probably be banned in Big Brother and cut her finger 'through to the bone'. Darren: 'That's quite a bit of claret.' Is that you, Danny Dyer? Bleed, bitch, bleed!
Dt Ottoman was in no rush. Let's hope she treats him better than she does her hairdresser. GC has gone to the hospital to get stitches. Imagine how relieved they must all feel. I wonder if we'll ever get to evict her and feel the same way?
I just missed the rules to the task but I guess I'll figure it out. Oh it's like 15 to 1. You answer a question and then knock someone out (not like that, although...). Scotty T thinks Darren might win the whole show. Danniella made Chris lose a life 'cos he's her friend'. Er...?
Tragic that Christopher didn't dare say Gemma was the drama queen of the house. What a fucking wet weekend. He nom-vommed her face to face! He'd been growing on me, too. I hate the words 'man up' but MAN UP has never been more apt in this case.
Scotty T targeting Steph again. With friends like him, who needs enemies? And still he'll win it.
GC threatening Danniella: 'Play it properly then.' Scary. She's like a one-woman mafia.
Gemma's face when Stephanie was being honest about what a cunt she is. Danniella sticking her oar in. What a bitch.
Danniella: 'I want a gift from my kids.' Who said it was that anyway? She's demented. I know she's having a bad day, but Jesus. I read on Twitter the prize was a facial. You can't just make up what prize you want. If you want to see a picture of your kids, go home. I hope your letter from home gets shredded, too.
So Danniella was cool to lose a life when it was Scotty, but not when it was Steph. 'And so you know it.' Gemma's face said she got whatever she wanted. Danniella stormed out the room.
GC (shouting): 'Stop it cos you're a very nasty girl!' Steph hadn't actually said a word. Then Gemma goes, 'She's mugging you off left right and centre' to Jeremy. Then she screams in the kitchen 'She don't let up!' Who? YOU! Steph was just playing the game, participating in the task, an alien concept to you, I know. Disappointed to see Tiffany go with them. She had a duff edit tonight.
Danniella: 'The bird's a fucking bully.' How has Steph bullied anyone? She's the one BEING BULLIED. And I don't use that word lightly, although I generally don't give a shit about that word (unlike slag). Which brings us to:
'You're a fucking slag, love!' Danniella screams, while out of earshot. Really brave. Well you're a washed-up dog. Then they bash out the fire exit and Gemma goes 'they either remove her or we're going.' Um... do you want an Uber or just get the bus?
I love the fact the task just went on after Gemma and Danniella flounced off. Jeremy and Steph are the last two standing and he threw it to her. That was actually a really sweet moment. Whatever you think of Steph, her relationship with Jeremy is real, unlike GC and Danniella's, which is rotten.
So Christopher can see that GC is fucking up Danniella's chances, but will he dare say it to anyone but Darren? The chainsmoking chickens in the corner! They should have a sign up in the corner saying 'Spines not required'. Christopher is right, GC is playing Danniella. That sums it up completely. I'd really warmed to Christopher after that jungle task, but I'm really fed up with him when he won't stand up and be counted. If he DOES, he could go deep.
The housemates are playing charades when the miserable cows re-enter. I'm shocked they don't even get a warning from Big Brother. They looked very cheerful in the DR. They are MUGGING OFF Big Brother (and us watching). Gemma doesn't mind going in a cage now. That claustrophobia clears up quickly, doesn't it?
Then they come back in and say sorry to Jeremy, but not Steph. It's just wrong. That felt horrible.
I'm really pleased Steph has immunity but less of the 22-year-old girl crap. She's right to feel aggrieved, though. She's not 'over thinking it'. She understands it completely. She gets it.
There was a bit with John getting involved (never!) and Tiffany summing it all up in the DR but that doesn't really need repeating.
Danniella then apologised. I do think Danniella is just a basketcase in with the wrong crowd. Her apology seemed genuine - I think she's just missing her kids, but no need to be sexist.
Gemma to Steph: 'Giwls have gotta stick togevver.' Ok then. Steph seems to be hinting she's done with her boyfriend now. About time. I wish she'd just say it outright.
Random moment of the night: Tiffany to Darren: 'You're such a force in here. You're so sexy and masculine.' A force! He's less than a drip. Darren thinks she's on a task but he's 'very flattered.' Tiffany thought he was 30! Hahaha. Darren: 'I'm happily married.' LOL. He's not trying to be a love rat in there, Tiffany. All I can think is Darren Day smells great or something. Women just fall at his feet. But in reality, he must smell like Rothmans.
Don't forget to listen to Big Brother Bile, it's going a bit stale now, but should be a fresh episode early next week: Bit on the snide
Cheers for reading. Goodnight!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)