Monday 21 April 2008

Britain's Next Top Model

The girls are already ten billion times more exciting and interesting looking than the last American lot, which was the worst series of ANTM EVER. I'm quite shocked as normally the British one is a complete chavalanche.
Obviously our host Lisa 'fucked George Clooney- so what?' Snowden is a personality vaccuum. They should get George's new bit of stuff to do it, she seems like good fun. But at the same time, you don't want to punch Snowden quite as much as Tyra.
The contestants: Ok I'm going to try and take down names cos I always get moaned at (aren't my descriptions good enough?) Sophie- very cute, Lily Allenish. One with a squarer jaw than a lego man (I forgot the name already!). One called Louise with the most bizarre two tone eyeshadow since 80s TV comedy 'Watching' (how the FUCK do I remember that? I'm SO OLD!) Oh and she's quite plain apart from that, although she looked alright in her picture. At least four or five are actually conventionally good looking, which is very rare for these model shows (Claire, Alexandra, Stephanie, Lauren, Charlotte). There's one called Lisa with kind of choppy layered hair who is interesting looking. There's one called LINZI who looks about 40. Sara- bolshy black girl. Rachael & Catherine- big noses. Leanne- nice lips and bright red hair. Martha, bit of a lightbulb head. Aaron- has a boys name. Aw no, she's quite cute. I like Leanne and Lisa best so far.
So they were asked to pose topless pressed against eachother and told it was about 'feminine empowerment'!!! I've heard it ALL now! Fucking hell, did they replace 'male wankfest' in the dictionary with 'feminine empowerment'? I wonder what they replaced gulliable with? Model?
There are new judges this year- some bloke in a flat cap, and some OAP called Huggy. Who the fuck were the judges before? I don't have a clue.
Aw Lily Allen girl went. She was pretty! The ones I like always leave rapidly. My taste sucks!

6 comments:

* (asterisk) said...

Missed it. Maybe that was a mistake. Might catch a repeat to see if it's as good as you say. But then, you didn't like The Orphanage, so what do you know?
;-)

lightupvirginmary said...

hey, I may not be a film conniseur like you (I cant even spell it) but if there's one thing I DO KNOW it's my trash TV! It can't be denied! :-)

Red said...

I'm sorry, I can't move past that line where you describe a girl as "very cute, Lily Allenish". That's an oxymoron if I ever heard one! Lily Allen is her father in a wig and a frilly dress. Not pretty, not pretty!

lightupvirginmary said...

hahahaa she does look like him, but a cuter version!

Red said...

Hey, girly, where you at? I want to read something new by you!

lightupvirginmary said...

Hello! Aw it's nice to be missed. I've been here, it's just nothings tickled my fancy lately.. I watched some thing about Fred West which was so crap it was untrue. I saw Russell Brand on Jonathan Ross, that was quite nice. That Headcases cartoon is quite funny as well, I like the animation.
Just wait till BBs on, there'll be no stopping me!