Celebrity Big Brother 2015: Sneaker gimps

Hi all! So it's live nominations tonight, let's hope they don't 'do a Heather' and they keep it running to time. Also, no cheating please.
Piss wars have already begun, I see. Still, better than scat wars.
No shower tray to put your bits on?! Not very celeb.
Michelle is 'so offended by the words Katie speaks.' She hasn't said anything yet. I hate the way they all know too much about each other before they go in. Perez virtually had their biographies tattooed on his body like that hottie in Prison Break.
Kavana knows Mel B, ha. I bet she doesn't know him.
Reg Holdsworth and Cheggers alliance coming up; old codgers alliance. LOL to Cheggers refusing to be on Fat Club. Like they'd call a show 'Celebrity Health.' They probably sold The Undateables as Lovely People's Last Chance at Love.
Nadia isn't fat, so why is she saying she is? Stupid woman. Of course no one would attack Katie in the street, you'd be too scared of her. I like the way Katie isn't backing down in the face of Nadia's quizzing of her. SAY IT TO YOUR FACE. Check.
Michelle is giving Perez some grief for not messaging her. IM? What century is this? Why is he sitting on the kitchen counter? Unclean.
Jeremy: antibacterial toilet wipe bankroll. I like the face he called Nadia out for 'whining and complaining'. Nadia is annoying.
Katie don't like almond milk? I thought she liked healthy people. It's almond milk or cokeheads, take your pick. She doesn't like Patsy because she's a nervous wreck. Bit mean.
Michelle is looking suspicious about the foot massage. I couldn't physically touch someone else's feet. Anything to do with feet, I want no part of it.
So, the task is over. Katie should just come out the DR and put everyone on full-scale blast.
Perez is such a little know it all! He's like teacher's pet. Knowing the dates people went out with people (ie. Calum and Lindsay is just plain creepy.) I liked Michelle's chat with Calum and the camera work, too. Not sure about 'husbanded', though.
I'm not commenting on all Red Holdsworth's actressing because it's what he wants. Airtime hog!
I feel sorry for Alicia. She's a sad person. Still rather be her than Katie, though.
Kirk Norcross, ugh. This girl looks way too nice for him. I mean, she seems a cunt, but she's too good looking for him. Remember when he was sexually harrassing that Georgia girl?
Jeremy: 'We're all on the same plane, going down.'
Uh oh, the Patsy Kensit marriage files, we may be here for some time. Katie being a cunt about it, ha. What a wrong 'un.
Katie Hopkins crying cos she loves her husband, haha. While wearing a Dappy hat. Also, why isn't she putting everyone on blast?! Fail.
Perez is impertinent asking Calum questions about his dead dad. That's very personal. Calum: 'He gave it a go.' Yeah, on someone else's liver.
OMG Jeremy is doing Cornholio impressions! YES! Nadia thinks he's mentally ill but he just needs TP for his bunghole. Uhuhuhuhuh. Bring back Beavis and Butthead.
Cami is hating on Calum's trainers. Is she 12? LOL. Petty but funny. His clothes are 'sick'. Is this the 90s?
Haha now Chloe is saying Calum is 12. Cami started it. I'm telling, etc. I don't mind Chloe, she seems alright.
This code is pretty crap, 'my sister' equals 'my boyfriend.' Calum, don't bring your mum into it. You've taken it too far!
Ok, here's the face to face noms. Buckle up.
Michelle: Nominated Ken for wanting to go home. Isn't she meant to nominate two?
Perez: Ken. Sheep vote.
Katie: Perez. She wants to be the biggest cunt in the house.
Nadia: Katie. 'We're polar opposites.' You're both annoying as fuck.
Cami: Ken. Ken is ruining these nominations.
Jeremy: Pasty for having 'some auto immune stuff.' Best one yet. Tribe talk! Patsy said thanks. He's right, she's a weak player.
Chloe: Ken. I want to know what fine line he's been treading. Sexism, no doubt.
Calum: Ken. Ken is Reg Holdsworth, btw.
Kavana; Ken.
Ken looks lived, ha. He nominated Cami because 'she bit him'. Footage, please.
Alicia: Calum. Cos she got off with him, ha. 'Least likely to go up' my arse.
Pasty: Bathroom gate. Tell us more! Ooh, Ken is having a go at her. I'm glad she gave it back to him.
Alexander: Perez. 'I think he's a total control freak.' LOL. Say how you really feel.
Keith: Perez for sitting on the counter. Damn right! Counter attack!
No one has nominated Jeremy! Sweet.
A Tuesday eviction. Interesting. Oh, the only people they've put up are Alexander, Chloe and Ken. They only put up the people who has one vote when it suits them.
They're not arguing so I'm going to wrap my blog up here. Perez killed it by saying 'they're not allowed to talk about it.' WTF? Idiot.
Sorry if you were waiting for our podcast the other night, our computer decided to eat it. We're going to try again tonight but I've learned my lesson not to promise! Also, thanks to everyone who said nice things about my blog. I appreciate it. Night.