Time for Cbeebies!
Julie: 'I just wanted to make it to the final.' You shouldn't have been a bit less duplicitous then.
'Because of a medical condition, Julie has her hair washed by an outside person.' WTF! What medical condition is that?! Divaitis? Again, the only reason they're telling us this is because Harvey is earwigging on Julie talking to her 'outside person' ie. mole.
Harvey can hear 'bare talking'. How can you be 'unprofessional' in the house? There's no professionalism required; you let it all hang out! You come as you are. What does he want her to do, start pulling pints? Saying someone is 'unprofessional' in the BB house is even more stupid than saying someone is 'inappropriate.' There's no such thing (well, except you know, threatening to rape someone, but apparently that's all hunky dory, too).
'Blatant.' Why does Harvey talk like a fucking 12 year old? Grow the fuck up. What did Julie say exactly? All you ever get is hearsay! Ashley: 'Someone should just tell her.' How about you, bruv?
Vote to save Julie just for one in the eye for this mutant Harvey.
Julie's hair looks nice now it's been done by a doctor. Did someone train for seven years to operate those GHDs? What medical condition is it? Alopecia? Dandruff?
Aw, to Julian sticking up for Julie, he's such a sweetpea. He knows exactly what she's like; he's just not bothered by it.
The living room they've set up looks like my living room; specifically the ornaments. I think we used to have that couch, too, back in the 80s. Ooh, this looks like a MASSIVE shit-stir task. Get your wooden spoon out.
Harvey aint got no social game! Is this first task like Pointless? Where's Richard when you need him?
Do you think they really asked 100 Big Brother fans? I don't there's 100 left.
I like Prince Lorenzo's eyebrows when he pops up in the corner. The Situation is just giving himself for every answer. Can't believe they didn't choose Julian for funniest housemate, Harvey actually chose Ashley over Julian; what a drongo.
Martin is going to look even smugger at being named most attractive. Sitch: 'He got me by a couple of percent' - lol.
Julie's gum chewing went into overdrive when she was named most manipulative. She's fucking scary, man. I would sleep with one eye open around her. Haha, she said even her husband does!
Martin: 'It's so wicked, this programme,' he says, smiling broadly. He's loving it.
The Situation: 'the bond we had was very thick.' Julie: 'no, you are very thick.' Julie, 80% of the public agreed! Julie has got some passive aggressive shit going on there.
Harvey is in the garden working on the sequel to 'Insania.' Martin is squeezing out a few 'dead parent' tears for the sympathy vote. He always was good in Eastenders, wasn't he? They're probably still alive (sorry).
I like the old people's home chic. I wish the BB house was really decorated like that.
This kid's TV show is rude; itchy growler?! Isn't that another name for a fanny? Puerile!
Julie can 'feel' the funny atmosphere. Because she's creating it! It's like Jasmine all over again.
This task is quite good today. At least it's kind of original.
LOL to 'throw me under the bus' being misquoted. Julie read that news out brilliantly considering she must be fuming. 'Lived through the world wars'! LOLOLOLOLOLOL. She did an Alan Carr smile then; brilliant.
Harvey's tut-tut-tut-twitching! Julie's going to throw him under the bus, and it won't be a metaphorical one, it'll be the number 29.
I feel sorry for Julian stuck between Julie and Coleen's bitching. I do feel he's holding back though; and he said as much when he said 'I don't want to make the news.'
Having to watch people searching under cushions for lighters on the TV is like looking at a mirror inside a mirror inside a mirror. It's a labyrinthine vortex. If I want to look at people searching for cigarette lighters, I'll merely turn to my left.
Can't they light the fags off the oven? Or if that's a health and safety issue, light a bit of paper and take that outside? Where there's a will there's a way.
Julie is being petty now. Julian is being so cool about things; not being drawn into the slagging session whatsoever. You can tell he thinks Harvey is pathetic. I feel a bit sorry for Prince. He seems a bit isolated, bless him.
Julie got her letter from home. 'Dear Julie, I can sleep with both eyes open tonight. Luv, Jeremy Kyle guest.'
It's annoying watching Harvey and Ashley floating their way to the end. I don't mind Sitch, but fuck those two.
Julie: 'I think Martin should stay.' Sure you do. Julian: 'Well, you are a disgrace.' Julie: 'yes, but that's not the point.' Aw. He has covered for her so well. I know part of it is gameplay; but I do believe 80% of it is that he's got a good heart. Julian FTW. I'd like to see Martin out tomorrow! Make it happen.