Monday, 30 March 2009

Dispatches: The Trouble With Boris

Boris might be useless, but at least he's not as odious as Ken Livingstone. Is there anyone on the planet who doesn't want to knock him out as soon as look at him?
With that said, Boris is utterly hopeless. I liked the description of him as a child getting distracted by shiny things. Oh, Boris! What a card.
Boris is apparently out of touch for wanting to scrap the bendy bus, as opinion on the street differed. Of course people on the street like the bendy bus; you can ride the bendy bus for free! I barely bother to use my Oyster on it, and I have a year long travel card. You just cant get to the little forcefield things sometimes. I personally have no problem with the bendys (benders?) except for the fact they are full of theives and drug addicts. And aren't they better for buggies/ wheelchairs etc? Some of the regular buses are so narrow and look like they havent been redecorated since 1960 if the upholstery is anything to go by.
Woah- Boris is in charge of 8 BILLION pounds a year! Fuck me.
Boris has been called a hypocrite for promoting green issues/ cycling whilst cutting funding for cycling lanes and scrapping the extension of the congestion charge. Levels of toxic gasses in London breach toxic air laws. Mmm! No wonder I'm ill again. Get me to the seaside.
Next there was a really boring bit about sleaze/ asbestos/ corruption which the basic crux seemed to be, Boris is mean as well as dumb.
If Boris can really make the air in London smell sweeter by the time of the Olympics, then he must have something spectacular up his sleeve. It probably involves the entire population of the city losing it's sense of smell.
It seems to me from this programme that Boris is not only dumb, he's corrupt. And he hates nature. But then he IS a Tory, what did you expect?

2 comments:

A.Jaye said...

Busy week huh M?

What about the best part? Telephone gangsterism? I'll be fucking furious if you hurt him too bad. No Boris - just a couple of black eyes and bruised ribs.

Like the mob said - "a little violence never hurt anyone".

Ossian said...

Boris writes the funniest newspaper articles though. He's foolish but not stupid. I agree with him about closing Heathrow and putting a replacement airport in the Thames estuary. I've never understood what makes people accept things the size of steel football fields flying over their houses every thirty seconds. If anyone tried to fire some bit of metal across the city to the other side, 200 police would turn up and beat the crap out of them. But Heathrow plays British roulette with the lives of everyone in London as well as deafening, suffocating and preventing people from sleeping properly and children from learning in peace and the government says "Great! let's build another runway."