Big Brother USA- The Final

Well, what a weird final. A strange crowd of drones (they may as well have been Mii characters) assembled outside the Big Brother gingerbread house. Where was the baying mob? The banners? Where was Davina? Oh, there she was, advertising hair-dye in the break. Subtle.
It was quite funny when the housemates got to grill Adam and Ryan- Adam started to go a bit manic and lose it, but him offering to give a load of the cash to charity was definitely wise. Ryan sounded much less convincing. I enjoyed Chelsia seemingly turning into a bizarre caricature of herself, but she did ask the pertinent question to Ryan- why would you love someone who branded you a racist on telly?
And were they or weren't they alluding to the Natalie/Matty blowjob? It was probably something else entirely.
And so Adam won, with 6 votes to 1, only Joshuah voted for Ryan to win; as usual, completely out of whack with the rest of the house (but that's why we liked him!)
I'm glad Sheila stayed loyal to Adam. I was hoping he would win, because I didn't want Ryan (or Jen!) to get their hands on half a million bucks. Jen's boobs looked horrible in that dress, all muscly and unfeminine.
And that was that. Adam got half a million, Ryan got 50,000 dollars, which isn't bad losing money. They even gave James 25K at the end for having the most lurid denim and the crappiest tattoos in history. They clearly have money to burn in America- next time- get a new host, that one is really fucking weird.
All in all, this has been the best thing on telly all year by a country-mile, something to genuinely get excited by, and consistently entertaining. It's just a shame hardly anyone watched it.
I'm sure our BB is going to die on it's arse this year by comparison. I wish the producers would take a look at this show, nick some of the tasks, and pick some seriously machiavellian contestants. Oh and then do vote to save instead of evict, then we lose the boring fuckers instead of the loveable bastards.
Just put me in charge and everything will be alright, basically. Vote me!