I'm blogging this on my phone so if it disappears halfway though, I wouldn't be surprised. I have got my netbook but my dinner's nearly ready so have to be ready to bust a move. I've already got the stink eye for eating a crisp sandwich too near dinner time.
Ah they've dug up reggie and fearne again. Delightful. Makes me pine for Jonathan King.
Example has got a face like a jug-eared child blowing up a balloon.
What is the difference between Example and Professor Green? They both look like chubby-faced little oiks you used to go to school with. Maybe I'm too old. But I suspect it's just rubbish, isn't it? Read all about it. No ta.
Will Young. That's some groovy dancing he's doing there. He looks like he's had a heavy night on whatever posh people drink.
Olly Murs looks fat but I think it might be my mum's huge telly. Is he not doing the one about the crab?
Ed Sheeran now. Nice jumper. There's not been a woman on yet. This is worse than Matt Cardie.
The Wanted. Do not want. Sexists.
Jessie J. Go away. Rubbish songs, odious personality. Dressed like a Christmas decoration. That plaster cast was the height of her career, it really was.
Didn't chewing over notes like that go out of fashion in the 90s?
Noah and the Whale. I guess that's the indie box ticked. Nothing for me this year, obviously. My mum is unimpressed with both Noah, the whale and Jessie J. She also predicted 'people will get sick of her soon.' Soon?
Even Pixie Lott has got out the washing machine for her song. Honestly 90s dance culture has been pillaged thoroughly this year. Darude, you were ahead of your time.
The only good thing I can say about this TOTP is they haven't repeatedly told up what's coming up for once. Probably because they're too embarrassed.
I don't know who The Vaccines are but my mums boyfriend said 'they sound like a group you see in a pub' and I don't think he meant it as a compliment.
Adele is beautiful. But she's not for me.
I missed who this band is. They're like a mini so solid crew. Probably the worst thing so far and that's saying something.
On an unrelated topic my mum just said 'I'm not homophobic. Some of my best friends are gay.'
Jimmy Saville: RIP.
My mum's boyfriend seems to think Little Mix are called Pick n Mix. If only. He is now saying one of them looks like a pig. It's not her fault what she looks like and I think she's cute anyway. Cannon bollocks! Little muffins!
Military wives. Are there no military husbands? Fuck the war. All of 'em.
My dins still not ready. But that's good cos I got to do my blog. Happy Christmas. I haven't even started drinking yet.