Wednesday, 25 May 2011

The Apprentice: lastminute.cunt

Beauty salon task. In Birmingham. Is Birmingham the grimmest place in Britain? It can't be far off. We used to go clubbing there very occasionally when we lived in Northampton. Talk about stuck between a rock and a hard place.
LOL to the 'clip-in winge'. Looked delightful! Orlando got volunteered to put makeup on and he looked THRILLED. He's got a GIRLFRIEND. Next you'll be insinuating he's GAY. And then he said 'spray tanning women is part of the task' looking beleaguered. Pussy-whipped or what (I can use this in a non-sexist way in my own blog- ha!)
I love the inventor guy! He's lush. I don't want Alan to shout at him. Be gentle.
I kind of like those big bows made out of fake hair they're selling. I don't if I can carry that shit off these days. I'm nearly 31!
I don't personally like beauty treatments when provided by qualified professionals, let alone by Apprentice contestants. Spas freak me out. I can't relax in that situation, it makes me want to go mentals. And if someone touched my feet I'd kick them in the face. DO NOT TOUCH THE FEET. Feet should be not seen and not heard and definitely not touched.
Love Tom not being able to remember the name of Lady Gaga! STFU Nick. Go suck on your Lord-Sugar-lemon-pop elsewhere. Karren Brady is also practising her best perturbed look. I wonder how much she gets paid for that kind of genius.
I like it when Suzy goes 'it's so unfair'. I'm surprised she doesn't stomp off to her bedroom and put Marilyn Manson on. She's getting set up to take the fall before they've even failed the task! Team Pessimist!
I liked Alan's joke about Vincent having the spray tan! I don't really like either of these girl team leaders, but the blonde one is preferable. I'm nervous my inventor is going to go now.
It's not the greasy spoon's fault you keep losing, Vincent.
OMG! that person I've never seen before who described something as 'lastminute.com' is my new most hated! UGH. I hate society.
Aw to the blonde team leader going all red and rashy. I'd go red and rashy in that situation, too. DON'T TAKE TOM IN. I heart Tom. Yeah, Natasha! She of the 'lastminute.com' EFFRONTERY.
Who really cares who goes out of this lot? Tom is safe. Vincent is safe! Rejoice.
I just worked out what the blonde one is called; Felicity. I don't want her to go. The other two are way more annoying. Oh, Felicity went. Just as I learnt her name! Dammit.
PS: It's lame they didn't say goodbye to her. That's nothing to be proud of. Didn't your mum teach you any manners? GOOD NIGHT.

2 comments:

LilyLipstick said...

I'm so relieved that Tom didn't go, I think he's kinda cute (I must be having some sort of quarter-life crisis to think that anyone on The Apprentive is cute, ugh). It was about time that the girls all turned on each other..."it's business" is not an excuse for having no manners...

lightupvirginmary said...

geekcrush! Let's hope he stays in for a bit. :)